Kestrel-cat - That Girl In The Deerstalker

Social Media and Chat Noir are definitely Best Friends and nothing can convince me otherwise.

A condensed list of Things Chat Noir Has Shown Us Through Social Media:

   • Selfies with street performers he just so happened to see during patrols

   • Selfies in general of him making the grossest duck face he possibly can in front of couples and tourists, who are all just trying to mind their own business

   • Videos of him narrating what random alley cats are doing, because he’s a self-proclaimed cat whisperer and needs everyone to know (he doesn’t actually speak cat, he’s bullshitting you)

   • A vine series where the camera is pointed directly at Ladybug’s face as he starts naming off random green-eyed, blond celebrities, claiming them to be his secret identity, and catching all of Ladybug’s reactions. Her reactions become increasingly angrier as the series goes on. (The series ends when Chat claims to be Adrien Agreste and she straight up screams so loudly he drops the camera)

   • A video of him with street clothes over his suit and big ass sunglasses over his mask, arm over certified civilian Marinette Dupain-Cheng’s shoulders, who is also wearing big ass sunglasses. They’re drinking smoothies and shit-talking fashion designers very loudly. Marinette says she loves Gabriel Agreste’s work but she’d punch him in the face bc he needs an attitude adjustment. Chat chokes on his smoothie

   • An interview he does with Alya except he’s wearing a fake mustache the entire time and doing an unexpectedly amazing job at keeping a straight face.

   • Posts of him complaining about how people throw away perfectly good cardboard boxes and how truly offended he is like are you joking—

   • Posts of him gushing over how much he loves Ladybug and wow he’s definitely going to be embarrassed by those 5 years from now

   • Selfies of him in a group of Chat Noir cosplayers, the last selfie featuring the look on their faces as they check their social media and realise holy fuck that’s the real Chat Noir aND HE’S POSTING PICS OF US

   • An hour long video of him explaining why Physics Is Awesome and you should love it too. He somehow does this while cramming puns in almost every single sentence. How does he not get tired

   • A list of his personal anime recommendations, most of them unsurprisingly featuring cats in one way or another. His favourite movie is The Cat Returns

   • An ungodly amount of puns revolving around him being bi

   • An interrupted alley cat video where Marinette calls him over to her balcony and drags him inside because she wants to turn it into a makeup video. He ends up with black lipstick, flawless contouring, and beautiful eyeliner. He comes back for another video because “I really rocked the black lipstick”

   • Unintelligible posts he made while accidentally high on catnip

   • A picture, taken by a kid who found his baton, of him tangled up in a poor old woman’s ball of yarn she was using to knit a scarf. Thankfully she seems amused and not ready to beat him with her purse

   • A vine of him absentmindedly pushing things off the edge of counters, buildings, and desks, filmed by Ladybug herself without his knowledge. He’s always smiling evilly after the act

   • Badly photoshopped pictures he’s made with his and Ladybug’s faces pasted onto infamous movie covers

   • That One Time He Was On A Talk Show And Was Permanently Banned

   • A cute video of him responding to fan questions from a livestream.

   • “I do not pose all the time I don’t know what gave you that ide—” suddenly glitter falls from nowhere, he’s giving his most powerful smoulder, body draped over a gargoyle. Ladybug is staring at him from above, unimpressed

   • Videos of him antagonizing and shit-talking Hawkmoth. Akumas start targeting him viciously and he mentions in a video how fucking amazing it is that his greatest enemy is actually following him on social media, he’s laughing

   • Selfies he’s taken with elderly ladies he’s found around Paris, all of which have captions along the lines of “I met a gorgeous woman today!” or “this young lady was gracious enough to give this tomcat the pleasure of a photo in her presence!”

   • A post of him cursing out catnip and how much he hated that his friends are now drinking tea made out of the stuff like she just had to like gardening, she just had to plant catnip, she just had to share the tea with her friends, he just had to have the worst luck in the world—

   • Memes. All the memes. He likes to bring the oldest ones back, knowing full well just how horrible they are.

   • A video of him reacting to a video of people complimenting him. He’s bright red by the end of the video. (Obviously Nino, Marinette, and Alya are included. Nino and Marinette are the most enthusiastic ones out of the whole lot)

   • “Why are you so active with social media, Chat Noir? Most superhero stories don’t go that way.” “Well, I want everyone to know that I am an idiot. An imbecile. A complete and utter moron. It’s reassuring that you are all fully aware of that fact, yet still trust the fate of the city in my paws. Which, to be fair, is a dumb move on your part as well, Paris. We are all buffoons, apparently.”

Feel free to add to the list in any way you can

Minion Soulbonds

Everyone destined to fall in loyalty with a Spark is born with that Spark’s sigil on their skin.

The scattering of trilobites among children born after the Heterodyne Boys vanish is taken throughout Europa as evidence that they’ll come back.

In Mechanicsburg all the children are still born with trilobites and that’s taken as hope of a different kind.

The scattering of winged castles throughout Europa is considered with puzzlement during the days when Wulfenbach is a small barony (which doesn’t even have an airforce!) and Klaus is mostly known as the Heterodyne Boys’ sidekick. Maybe it’s going to be someone else’s sigil?

Bang hides hers. She’s a pirate queen, the last thing she needs is to follow a Spark around. When she finds herself doing just that she hides the tattoo anyway. Gil would be smug and Klaus would be unsurprised.

Boris regards his with annoyance, he doesn’t want to belong to any Spark, and then with hope, it’s not the sigil of the Spark that experimented on him, he won’t belong to them forever, and finally with acceptance.

Moloch’s trilobite baffles him when he’s younger. If the Heterodyne Boys return it certainly won’t involve him. When he’s sent to Castle Heterodyne and sees the same mark on the other prisoners he thinks that’s it, the Castle owns them now and was obviously destined to. The truth, when he’s faced with it, scares him even worse.

Violetta’s trilobite nearly gets her killed. A sign of disloyalty in the making, written on her skin. Tarvek pulls strings to keep her alive and hopes it means a real Heterodyne (because the alternative is Lucrezia inhabiting the body of one and he will not see his stubborn, loving cousin in loyalty with her.)

Hell yeah, interior designer!

I wish I could call everyone who liked or reblogged this “enablers” and blame  you, but I think we all know I’d be adding more anyway.

edit: fuck this got long. and…dialoguish…

Tarvek’s superhero persona is Storm King; that’s from the other superhero au but really it’s the one true option here. I’m probably going to draw several things from that.

Gil’s is Lightning Bug, ditto(ish.)

I dunno if they’d have kamis like in ML, but for this au I do prefer their powers coming from something like that? They both have rings? Or something around their necks, if we want to echo Girl Genius fashion.

maybe the school they attend is super stuffy and requires uniforms with ties and both boys have magical tie pins. Magical tie pins which they turn or tap to TRANSFORM.

i’m really just here for magical girl boy transformation sequences tbh.

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Things Marinette Dupain-Cheng has contingency plans for:

Adrien Agreste is a serial killer

Adrien Agreste is a secret robot

Adrien Agreste is a Fae who wants to steal her soul

Adrien Agreste is the harbinger of an alien invasion

Things Marinette Dupain-Cheng does not have a contingency plan for:

Adrien Agreste says he loves her back

ah, yes. cringefail affection giver and cringe fail affection receiver. what a lovely dynamic.

aka just two guys who cannot communicate to save their lives

Too bad the prophet Cassandra never met Odysseus

I’m just thinking that a time-travel AU that requires the team to reorient as Mandalorians where, at the first incident of someone asking questions, Obi-Wan declares “I know their names as my children” about Anakin and Ahsoka, making both of them cry later on in private, would be very nice, actually.

This wasn’t planned! He just SAID it!

“These are my kids,” says Obi-Wan Kenobi, on the spot, thinking it’s just a convenient and largely accurate way to describe his relationship with these young people in his care, completely missing the fact that he’s secured Anakin’s obsessive will-kill-for-you loyalty in the span of two seconds.

“That was just a cover, right?” “It might as well be true, Anakin, I did raise you for half your life and trained you as a warrior, that counts by Mando standards, and explaining Jedi-style apprenticeships would–” “I think Skyguy’s just asking if you really think of him as family.” “Well, obviously.”

Maybe he waffles a bit about age and how he’s not really OLD ENOUGH to be Anakin’s father but from a cultural perspective–

Just like… Obi-wan using a lot of hedging words because he’s allergic to telling Anakin he cares, but also, Anakin is basically his son-brother.

(Ahsoka knows but would def appreciate hearing, but Anakin… that kind of verbal confirmation would mean a lot.)

the infamous potlid incident

Ever since I saw Daruk's diary I can't stop thinking about this scene in my head. A literal pot lid got Link appointed to be Zelda's guard.....

Impa probably scampers over to check on Zelda and Link uses that moment to crabwalk away before he can make a bigger fool of himself😂