Tim: Bruce, I’m Gay

i'm thinking about jason vs white streak and a helmet that doesn't cover his entire face, and the absolute missed comedy of the entirety of crime alley thinking that they are getting beaten up by a very old man.

Average crime alley guy: yeah and then he stopped wearing the full face cover and his hair is like white underneath it's so weird--

other guy: wait. like. white? Like. LIke old person white?

Average crime alley guy: oh my god. oh my goooood. he uses a voice modulator to hide that he's approximately 98 years old. mr hood sir do you need help crossing the street?

Jason, 19: ?????????????

jason then realizes the convenience of being able to take off the mask and no one realize it's him because they're looking for someone older than alfred and just goes along with it and tells increasingly made up stories about being young in the 40s while shooting peoples kneecaps out.

this shit is the only remaining good part of twitter

bruce was not made to be a father he was made to be a grandpa. hes not supposed to raise children he's supposed to spoil grandchildren rotten and terrorize strangers with images of ugly babies. you will never see bruce wayne more serene or at peace with the universe than when he is in some meeting in some board room showing a bunch of people who really hate children photos of his granddaughter until they look like hes got them in a saw trap. Once upon a time he would have been trapped in here with them. Now, though? They're trapped in here with him.

Clark’s favourite post-big-mission-destress is using his super hearing to tune in to whatever bullshit Bruce has to deal with on the batplane ride back to Gotham with whatever batkids were on hand during the fight.

Bruce: alright is everybody strapped in-?

Tim: -fucking told you to move up- BRUCE TELL DAMIAN TO SHOVE IT

Jason: oh my god did you see Green Arrow eat shit when that guy shot at him?

Dick: Jason YOU shot him

Bruce: Damian you have to let Tim- Jason that was YOU-?

Jason: hey i TOLD him to move out the way it’s not my fault the bullet ricochetted off a lamppost into his leg-

Bruce: i told you to leave the real bullets at home- TIM STOP HITTING YOUR BROTHER

Duke: WAIT I LEFT MY IPOD BACK AT THE FIGHT

Tim: how am i the one getting in trouble- HES LITERALLY GOT HIS KNIFE OUT

Damian: i told you if you got in my way during the battle you would regret it and WHAT DID YOU DO?!

Stephanie: shut up Damian you were totally about to kick it, Tim saved your ass.

Tim: THANK YOU! AND WHAT DO I GET IN RETURN?

Jason: who the fuck takes an ipod to a fight we literally have bluetooth in the comms

Duke: who the fuck dies to the Joker he’s literally just a guy

Jason: OI-

Stephanie: *cackling*

Bruce: OK- Damian and Tim, opposite sides of the plane! Duke we can’t turn back now, i’ll just have to get you a new ipod-

Dick: BRUUUUUUUUCE JASONS BLEEEEDDDIIINNNNGGG

Jason: shut the fuck up you fucking snitch!

Bruce: WHO’S BLEEDING?!? JASON-

Stephanie: hey Duke can i paint your nails- TIM GIVE ME BACK MY PHONE

Damian: Father, Grayson has passed out

Bruce: WHAT-

Jason: HAH! I WIN THE BET HE FUCKING OWES ME 20 DOLLARS

Tim: what bet?

Jason: we both got stabbed so we didnt tell anyone to see who could stay awake the longest

Bruce: WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT-

Duke: do you guys even understand how many songs i had downloaded on that ipod? it was fucking engraved, man

Stephanie: Damian stop moving your fucking hands you’re gonna mess up the nail polish

Damian: I HAD TO ITCH MY NOSE

Jason: does anyone wanna see the video of Green Arrow eating shit or what?

Tim, Damian, Duke, Stephanie: YES

Bruce: WE HAVE TO GET DICK A BLOOD TRANSFUSION-

-back with the Justice League-

Clark: *sitting back with his eyes closed, a serene smile on his face*

Barry, whispering to Ollie: what’s he doing?

Ollie: i think it’s a post-battle meditation thing, calms him down

Barry: man, i should really start getting some healthier habits. i never bother meditating.

Ollie: he truly is an inspiration to all.

Omg He’s dead?!? No!!

Inspired by this post

In order for Danny to go ghost he has to die. Every, single, time. While it was definitely concerning at first, there r only so many times u can die and be ok before u just stop freaking out about it.

This is why when a 20 y/o Danny gets kidnapped by a cult that intends to use him as a sacrifice to a demon, he is oddly calm about the whole thing. As soon as they kill him he’ll just turn into a ghost and stop them so it’s fine.

Problem, he was expecting the summoning part of this whole shebang to happen after his death. Whatever, he’s fought demons before so as soon as they do kill him he’ll just have to kick this guy’s ass and then put a stop to the cult.

Only he’s plans r changed, get again, when some of the batkids show up before the cult can kill him. Double fuck bc it’s clear these guys r not equipped to handle a demon and with how he’s a little tied up right now he can’t really kill himself. So with very limited options he resorts to asking the heroes to kill him.

Needless to say, Nightwing is very concerned about the seemingly suicidal hostage. Red Robin is confused as fuck and decided it’s probably best to leave the guy tied up until they could drop him off at a hospital. Spoiler thinks the guy’s just joking but gets more concerned the more he insists they kill him. Hell even Robin and Orphan are thrown off by the guy’s repeated requests for death as the fight goes on.

It’s at this point that Red Hood, getting tired of the guys voice, decided to actually asks the guy why he wants to die.

Problem with this is Danny fucking sucks at explaining things and for some reason thinks “I can totally kick that demon dudes ass but like, only if I’m dead.” Is a satisfactory answer.

For most of the bats it’s not. For Hood tho? Who has a better understanding of magic than the rest of the fam and has been wanting to shut this guy up all fight?

“Seems legit.” *BANG*

Scott: Alright, so the vampire's gravestone is— Stiles: Cenotaph. Scott: What? Derek: It's only a gravestone if it marks the location of a body. A monument honoring someone whose body isn't present is a cenotaph. Scott:I'm… not sure that's how it works if the body gets up and walks away on its own. Stiles: There's a precedent for gravestones being reclassified as cenotaphs if the body is later removed and re-interred elsewhere. There's no rule that says the body itself can't do the removing. Scott: Okay, but the body is very much coming back. That's kind of what we're here to accomplish. Derek, shrugging: So it's a temporary cenotaph. Scott: And naturally our greatest concern here is avoiding semantic ambiguity. Stiles, nodding: Semantic ambiguity is how vampires get you.

Even older Timkon art

a bunch of sketches of these two because i love them, enjoy

this may be the stupidest thing ive made

Tim: So Duke, you officially been at the manor a year, how are you liking it?

Duke: I’m finally settling in. I’m no longer worried Bruce is going to send me away.

Jason: I get that. I thought I was just some charity case. I was terrified that I would mess up and end up back on the streets. I stole a bunch of expensive looking things and kept them in a go bag. I was prepared.

Damien: I too feared being sent away. My grandfather would have been disappointed. I was prepared to fight to the death to prove my place in the family.

Dick: I was sleeping with a knife in my sock in case he sent me back juvie.

Cass: (signing) I feared disappointing him. I felt like I needed to earn my place here.

Steph: He couldn’t get rid of me if he tried. I am like glitter.

Tim: Same. I think he tried to kick me out like 6 times. I just laughed and walked past him.

Duke: Are we just going to ignore Dick’s knife comment?