Im Fucking OBSSESSED With Han Yoojin. This Guy Is Literally The Most Insane One In The Group. To Outsiders

Destroy it. Immediately upon sighting subject B3-8812 you must remove its life force. The gummy’s. To properly dispose of subject B3-8812 you must remove its gummy insides and set them on fire in the nearest entity containment unit. 

Subject B3-8812 is a shifter with a bad habit of causing mischief, usually of the dangerous variety. It has a tendency to take the life forces of other living creatures and use said life force to power its ability to shift. 

To locate S-B3-8812 you must look for items that seem out of place, such as the horrible abomination seen above. Things like that gummy horror show don’t naturally occur, they are what one might consider nightmare fuel; which ironically enough is exactly what S-B3-8812 uses in its shifting. S-B3-8812  uses creatures from you most beautiful dreams and your most haunting nightmares to design what it wishes to shift into. 

Sometimes it chooses to become people, or characters, and sometimes it decides to disguise itself as and item, a plant, or a food. The reason it chooses to become assimilate to a food option occasionally, is because to pull those nightmarish or dreamlike characters from your brain it must inhabit your body first.

Angel manta ray (what if fish was bird??)

Sucks that "sleeping together" refers to sex. Sometimes a fella just wants to snooze with a pal.

one of the major appeals of cumplane to me is that shen qingqiu has all these impressive and interesting guys chasing after him and willing to wait on him hand and foot. but the one guy who he somehow favors the most is the overworked loser he's always fighting with???

insanity. if i were liu qingge i'd break something.

i watch baseball for the side quests

HC—Luo Binghe looks almost identical to Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky. (basically Airplane is hot but doesn’t realize it.)

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Shen Yuan woke up back in modern China after spending sixty years in PIDW, so, of course, the first thing he did was message Airplane.

(That’s actually the second… third?…thing he did. The first was trying reach out to the system. The second was crying.) ((But if Shen Yuan were asked why he was crying he’d scoff. Tears? No way! His eyes were just dry.))

Anyway, he reached out to Shang Qinghua—who, by the grace of God, came back with him—and found out that they both lived in Hong Kong. And not only that, but in the same neighborhood! Which was insane, but also very lucky. Maybe even too lucky? The universe never usually helped them out. Maybe this kindness of them being so near each other was an apology from The System? Whatever it was, it was best not to look a gift horse in the mouth.

The two agreed to meet on a Saturday, when Shen Yuan didn’t have school (being back as a senior in high school sucked).

Here’s the thing, Shang Qinghua sent a long winded text as a warning about how he looked very different. Which…fair. Everyone in PIDW was gorgeous, and people in the real world were not like that.

They agreed to meet at a café. Shen Yuan had sent Shang Qinghua a selfie so the man knew who to look for. It was a decent selfie, one Shen Yuan may have spent too much time on. It was a mirror selfie, showing off a nice outfit and Shen Yuan throwing up a peace sign. The photo showed an older teenager, with black hair that fell to his shoulders, large black eyes, and a silly smile. (He sent the picture to his mom too.) ((Seeing his family again was a whole other story better never to be told. There were a lot of tears and hugs on Shen Yuan’s part. It was a little embarrassing.))

Shen Yuan had gotten to the café early, snagging a corner table and waited with two iced lattes. He watched people out of the window. The streets were busy with both pedestrians and cars, there were delivery bicyclists and people carrying shopping bags. It was crowded. And loud. And dirty.

Being back was weird.

But, having indoor air conditioning was nice. And the internet! Oh God, he’d sell his kidney for the internet back home.

He blinked his eyes, his contacts felt harsh against them. Years without needing them made him forget what they were like. He should’ve worn his glasses, but had honestly forgotten where he put them. Maybe he should buy another pair? It wasn’t like he lacked the funds and he wasn’t sure how long he’d be in the modern world.

It was the chair across from him scrapping across the wooden floor that startled Shen Yuan back into focus.

His phone told him that Airplane was five minutes late.

“About time you showed u—Binghe?” Shen Yuan gapped.

“Close-ish?” Shang Qinghua flushed and adjusted his black framed glasses. His curly hair was kept in an undercut, he had pierced ears and a lip piercing and a sleeve tattoo on his right arm. He had freckles, dimples, and a 5 o’clock shadow too. Which. What? Okay. “Hi.”

That was Shen Yuan’s husbands face looking back at him! Sure, the eyes were black and there was no demon mark, but he intimately knew that face.

“Qinghua?!” Shen Yuan wheezed his name, his heart doing weird things in his chest at the fucking shock. “You look…you’re nearly identical to…”

“Yeah,” Shang Qinghua sighed, “imagine how surprised I was the first time I saw Binghe. The system stole my face!”

The voice was the same as Luo Binghe’s, even though the pitch was a little different.

And the body. Because…Shang Qinghua was tall? And muscular? And he was mother fucking LUO BINGHE.

“What the fuck?” Shen Yuan stared.

Shang Qinghua sighed as he grabbed his iced latte. His nails were painted black.

“My brain can’t—” comprehend this. Shen Yuan’s mind was static. Error 404 bounced around in his brain.

Was this some sick joke? Did The System do this? Was he really back in the bamboo house resting in bed and having a weird as fuck dream?!

“Wanna take this somewhere else?” Shang Qinghua asked, his eyes darted around the establishment uncomfortably. People were staring. At him. Because he was fucking gorgeous.

Shen Yuan had So. Many. Questions.

“Is it as bad as your office at An Ding?” Shen Yuan asked, his lips curled disdain.

Shang Qinghua huffed a soft sound of amusement. “Where do you think Binghe gets his clean freak mentality from?”

“Wait,” Shen Yuan stood up when Shang Qinghua did. “When you said you wrote a self-insert, you didn’t mean Shang Qinghua??? You meant Luo Binghe?!”

“Well, yeah, bro.” It was surreal to hear the word ‘bro’ come out of that mouth. “Binghe is all the good, bad and ugly of me, amped up to eleven. Well…with bad at a fifteen.”

“Wait, what?” The hamster in Shen Yuan’s wheel of a brain began to run faster as thoughts began to practically explode. But there was one that was louder than any of the other:

Did this mean that Shen Yuan basically married Shang Qinghua?!

what even is a crush

oh my god, I need a fic about demons across the realm looking at the two in awe and Shang Quinghua never knowing why until someone explains that their story had inspired literally SO MANY books, Regret of Chungsang? Nah, this is frozen affections (or sumn)- I bet the same problem the peak lords had with wrangling all the Regret of Chungsang books out of the hands of the disciples was a problem Mobei-jun had with his citizens T-T

Every single day I'm grateful for that time I stumbled on the SVSSS headcanon that while Bingqiu is considered highkey confusing and lowkey cringe in the demon realm, Moshang is known as the Power Couple™. They're the demonic love story. The 'It Couple'.

Just generations of demons sighing over the dramatic and bloody love story of the Northern King and his right hand man plus spymaster, yearning for one of their own filled with such glorious violence and betrayal! A classic childhood friends to lovers narrative filled with ups and downs and copious murder and gore! Love at first sight! The story of the loyal spy who rose up the ranks of the brutal Northern Court, culling his competition while providing vital intel to his liege, all the while infiltrating the most powerful cultivation sect in the world and eventually even becoming a Peak Lord! The slow burn of all slow burns! All kinds of spicy complicated power imbalances! Sexy, unexpected age gaps! Years of heavy plot! Decades of passionate courting! The pinnacle of inter-species forbidden romance! The tale of a man who swore eternal loyalty after falling violently in love at the very first meeting, calling a mere Prince His King in his desire and determination to see his beloved's ascension to the throne that was his birthright, and the Demon Prince who was unexpectedly presented with fierce loyalty in a life that had until then been rife with treachery and grabbed it with both hands and never looked back!

...and there's Junshan and the weird human he keeps around. Somewhat interesting if you're into that teacher-student thing I guess. There were very few deaths. Some bland murders. The trial arc and the self destruct thing plus corpse hoarding was interesting but overall very vanilla. Unseasoned. Not even a proper decade of drama. Kinda boring. And Junshan's half human so they're like Walmart version inter-species romance. But whatever the Emperor's into I guess. His dad was kinda weird too but at least his relationship with that human woman had some kick to it. The new generation just doesn't appreciate a long drawn out painful romance tsk tsk...

Like infinitely grateful to whoever first spawned that headcanon. Never fails to make me laugh. Honestly the most hilarious thing I've ever seen in this fandom. Hope your pillow is always cold and you never stub your toe.

Messed Up Idea: Semi-Good reveal where Danny's parents fully accept and love him, but they go into overprotective mode when the GIW get a lucky shot in one day. Terrified of their precious son's end they move out to Gotham where he can get plenty of ecto but the GIW are less likely to find him.

Unfortunately the best way to keep him from being found is to keep him in a special room they built to keep his ecto-signature contained and untraceable. Danny hates this because his parents won't let him out of that room anymore! It's a gilded cage filled with soft comforts and things he loves, but his sister and friends aren't there and he can't feel the wind or see the sky. Only his parents come to see him, but he knows he should be grateful they love him so much. This is the most attention they've ever given him.

But sometimes Danny is Bad and he slips away to haunt the rooftops away from his new home. He knows that it's wrong and he's endangering himself and his parents but he misses Jazz in Stanford and his friends back in Amity and the stars just above the burning smog. Sometimes he just spends lonely nights staring out at the city lights before he needs to return to that loving prison. But maybe someone new can keep him company on those lonely nights until at last he can be free again.

I feel like i need to say this where i can be judged for it so i can be sure i understand, because no one ever mentions it when they tell you to ‘be the bigger person’, but Being the bigger person isn’t about being more mature than whoever you’re arguing with, its about not letting yourself turn into the type of person you wouldn’t want to spend time with or hang out around. Don’t be the type of person you’d only befriend begrudgingly. Don’t ever stop trying to be the type of person you’d want to talk with.