Latest Posts by ladyv-aka-via - Page 4

Pass it on 💛

What a bean

What if i draw rex being a shy bean

And we've come full circle again

Balenciaga: Chevalier Armor Knight Boots AW21

Nine (or however many) people you'd like to get to know better

Tagged by @nytpicking

Last song: Soldier, Poet, King - The Oh Hellos

Favourite Colour: Oof that's a hard one. I love me a very vibrant cyan blue/aquamarine, light neon green and a nice magenta. Add a dash of black to that combo? Yes ma'am.

Currently watching: My favourite YTber debunking influencers, MLMs and pyramid schemes.

Sweet/Savoury/Spicy: Yes

Relationship status: Pringle

Current obsession: Non fandom? Doll customisation. Unfortunately I have to wait until I can continue with my project because MONEY *head slamming into the table repeatedly*. Also room renovation. Fandom? STAR WARS. More specifically Anakin Skywalker. I do love my special little babygirl. Oh yeah and Lucifer (Hazbin Hotel) he's a my babygirl too.

My no pressure tags: @jetii-mando @jayjaymorgan @farkmagic

From the river to the sea.

اللهم انصر اخواننا و خواتنا في فلسطين

i must not stir the pot. stirring the pot is the notifications-killer. participation in the discourse is the little-death that brings total activity obliteration. i will face the bad opinions on the internet. i will permit them to pass over me and through me. and when they have gone past, i will turn the block button onto their source. where the discourse has come from there will be nothing. only i will remain.

I was bored and I felt like fem Vaderkin needed some love! Seemed like a perfect solution for it!

Do I have excuse? Does boredom counts??

Anyway @aniisnotokay reblogged Balenciaga's medieval armour boots mentioning lady Vader and... Yeah. That's- that's the story behind it.

Enjoy!

Do I have excuse? Does boredom counts??

Anyway @aniisnotokay reblogged Balenciaga's medieval armour boots mentioning lady Vader and... Yeah. That's- that's the story behind it.

Enjoy!

When the Harry Potter HBO series comes out, I better not be seeing any of the bullshit justifications that you guys used to justify your Hogwarts Legacy purchases.

"Oh, she won't be making any money from it!" She's the executive producer.

"There's no ethical consumption under capitalism anyway!" That excuse applies when you're talking about things that humans actually need, like food. That excuse does not apply when you're talking about a TV show.

"I have to support the creators!" No you don't. No you fucking don't. If that excuse was true, you'd have to consume every piece of media that was ever created. Besides, Warner Brothers is a billion-dollar corporation. You won't hurt their feelings if you boycott one TV show.

"But it was my childhood!" I don't care. I legitimately do not care.

I don't wanna go through this bullshit again. Just don't fucking watch the series. It's that simple.

RIP. Aaron Bushnell I hope I can help spread your message like wildfire

Like you I am a fem anakin appreciator, but you cannot convince me she would be so yassified. She’s gorgeous and feminine but you cannot convince me she’d be wearing makeup and have her hair down and luscious every single day. She would be a messy bun every day kinda gal (but the messy bun looks so intentional and beautiful, not legit messy)

Appreciator is an understatement, my dear anon. More like straight up fanatic. XD

And do not you worry. I detest yassification, and I 100% agree with you!

She grew up a slave turned monk in canon. And in my modern aus, grew up poor in a desert town working her ass off to support her single mother.

I cannot see anakin (canon or modern au) wearing makeup or having any type of routine besides the essentials of wash face, brush teeth, and...? And even then that's iffy. Especially when busy with a mission or project or what have you.

She wouldn't even remember to brush her hair unless someone reminder her. That or she was worried her curls would become a matted untamed mess lol.

She, just like her cis male counterpart, is just naturally gorgeous. And effortlessly so. And it would infuriate everyone around her who puts so much time into looking even half as good as she does on a bad day.

And fuck yeah! Messy hair/bun anakin for the win!!!

She love long hair and has no idea what to do with it, so up it goes into the messiness of an updo.

Only effort she ever puts forth (depending on au) is for the occasional date night or gala type event she is forced to attend and told to look decent for.

Tho, friendship with padme would def allow her to explore more 'feminine' things like fancy clothes and makeup.

(I wish I could portray this in the app I use for editing. But alas, I can not 😔. The default is makeup, and the updo options are atrocious)

Oh god....

brought some fruit for the potluck

So why is Obi-Wan the fandom bicycle? Like, I'd legit love an explanation.

I love him. So so much. He is one of my faves. But why does everyone think he fucks and gets fucked by literally every other sentient in the gffa?

It's impossible to search his character tag without filtering and blocking out so many ships and other tags.

As always don't forget about eSims

Talk about depression and mental health, It helps stop the stigma

yall have got to be more normal about Southern people and I'm not kidding. enough of the Sweet Home Alabama incest jokes, enough of the idea that all Southerners are bigots and rednecks, and enough of the idea that the South has bad food. shut up about "trailer trash" and our accents and our hobbies!

do yall know how fucking nauseating it is to hear people only bring up my state to make jokes about people in poverty and incestuous relationships? how much shame I feel that I wasn't born up north like the Good Queers and Good Leftists with all the Civilised Folk with actual houses instead of small cramped trailers that have paper thin walls that I know won't protect me in a bad enough storm?

do yall know how frustrating it is to be trans in a place that wants to kill you and whenever you bring it up to people they say "well just move out" instead of sympathizing with you or offering help?

do yall understand how alienating it is to see huge masterposts of queer and mental health resources but none of them are in your state because theyre all up north? and nobody seems to want to fix this glaring issue because "they're all hicks anyways"

Southern people deserve better. we deserve to be taken seriously and given a voice in the queer community and the mental health space and leftist talks in general.

I-

*dies*

Balenciaga: Chevalier Armor Knight Boots AW21

TomSka has spoken. And all was hell.

Tomska going hard on Twitter again.

Apparently this tiktok was deleted hours after I saved it.

i didnt realise ao3 was started in response to lj deleting account relating to p//edophi|ia and they explicitly support the posting of such works yikes

You know I will actually

EXCUSE ME?!

HOw did I only now find out this is a thing?! @swartists4palestine thank you for this brilliant idea and if you ever open up the artist comm applications hit me to up!

Stunning piece @aliettali, I'm living for Ember!

Thank you @laz-laz-ace-pilot for your donation 🇵🇸

Art by the wonderful @aliettali

PSA that has been given 100 times already but needs to be said again:

The reason you, gen Z queers, need to be kink positive isn't because you support those kinks. It is okay to be disgusted by them, actually.

The reason you need to support kinksters is because "these kinks are disgusting" is the framework the alt-right is using and will continue to use to outlaw you. They don't think you're any different from the guys at Pride in leather puppy suits. They think your ENTIRE EXISTENCE is sexual. They think you holding hands with someone of the same gender, or existing as a trans person at all, is the same as a straight couple playing tonsil hockey in public.

YOU ARE A FETISH TO THEM. That is all you will ever be to the alt-right. They will never see you as human. When they talk about "our children being exposed to sexual perversion" they don't mean BDSM like you think they do. They mean YOU.

The only way to preserve your own existence is to fight for the right of kink to exist, because the instant kink becomes taboo or outlawed again*, rest assured, the alt-right will become MUCH more transparent about just what they think about your existence.

When you harp on about disgusting kinks and how they need to be hidden or outlawed and how they're harmful and everyone who does them is (insert thing here), you are giving the alt-right the tools they will use to imprison you as soon as they have unchecked power to do so.

THAT is why kinksters have been part of the queer community, part of Pride, from the start. Because the only way to keep our community safe is by truly ensuring everyone has unlimited sexual autonomy so long as the activity is taking place between consenting adults. It's just like how abortion-related laws are the lynchpin for all manner of medical autonomy laws.

The queer community can't stand without kinksters and vice versa. Even if you yourself aren't a kinkster and find them disgusting, like it or not, that is just how it is.

*Sodomy was illegal in Texas until 2003 and the law is still on the books, just not allowed to be enforced thanks to Lawrence v Texas, which SCOTUS has said they have an interest in striking down

ive been seeing a new wave of transmedicalists lately I think we gotta start being vocal again about how nasty they are. you don't need to take hormones or have surgery to be a trans person. changing your name and pronouns is gender affirming care. wearing new clothes and hair and makeup is part of transitioning too. you dont need to pass to be trans, you don't need to be male or female.

nonbinary, agender, genderfluid, genderqueer people are trans too if that's a label they want to use for themselves. and anyone who says otherwise is a piece of shit. it's not "anti-transitioning" to say so, it's anti-telling other people what to do with their bodies. it's pro-minding your own fucking business and letting people do what they want with their gender and treating them with compassion and enthusiasm

A cute guy likes me on a dating app. After chatting with them for weeks, we decide to go on a date. They are very flirtatious and forward over the app, but not when we meet in person. He admits he thought I was transmasc like him, we laugh about it because his mistake is funny and means I'm not passing but in a silly backwards way. I think his sudden awkwardness in person may be nervousness and flirt with him in ways less forward and aggressive than he'd been flirting with me earlier, and they become cold and distant for the rest of the date. By the time I get home they've blocked me on the app we met on. This case of being mistaken as a transmasc on a dating app will happen 3 more times, and in 2/3 times it results in a similar sudden lack of interest where once they were coming on to me. None of these people will be cis.

I am in a self defense class for queer people, learning hand to hand combat as a community. I have been here months. I notice I'm the only transfem in the classes but there are other trans people there so I don't think much of it. Today I have some stubble as I did not have time to shave before the early morning class. When discussing unrealistic action movie and anime fight scenes I describe on of my favorites, quoting the lines as I pantomime the goofy moves. They smile and laugh along until the word bitch leaves my lips in one quote, then the bisexual woman who only ever they/thems me glares at me like I've committed a grevious crime, and the rest of the class looks at me like a freak in awkward silence for a moment before moving on. I learn bitch is not a word a clocky bitch can "reclaim". I am quiet in classes now, and when I go I focus primarily on the training, when I see other trans women try it out they often give me a sad look and do not return for a second class. I get a sinking feeling that if I ever use this training to save my life one day I'd be branded a violent man instead of a strong woman.

I am texting with a good friend of years who was one of the people who helped me realize I was trans like them and even the one who helped pick out my name loves talking about our shared interests and sharing their favorite smut with me. We bond over favorite stories, artists, characters, and kinks as well as our trans experience. Yet they constantly tell me they could never date someone who's AMAB because of the trauma of being "female socialized" and their genital preferences for vulvas. Every compliment they have ever given me on my appearance or outfit is followed up by "but in a non-sexual way, I could never date you". Today I finally have the courage tell them they don't need to say that every time. They ignore this response. We keep talking for awhile, but they start taking months to respond to my messages and respond with a short sentence at most. They no longer share details about their life and shut me out when I ask or share details about mine, even the most mundane and chaste details. I stop talking to them. A birthday gift I bought them months before this falling out happened looms at me in my closet. I cannot use it as it doesn't fit me but can't bring myself to throw it away, just in case we reconcile one day. I feel pathetic for craving friendship with someone who sees me as "abuser-bodied", that so much of my early stages would've been impossible without their help. I feel a little more lost without them.

I am at a queer/trans/enby kink dance party with some friends. I am scantily clad and wearing a skirt and high heeled boots. I do not pass well so this space is one of the few places I feel safe and free dressing like this. It is packed with queer and trans people just like me engaged in delightful debauchery and wearing very little. The music hurts my ears but I'm happy to be here, I feel overstimulated but alive and authentic. I am approached by a beautiful stranger from across the dance floor, she is graceful and stylish, like some modern Galadriel clad in leather, white lace, and industrial piercings with impeccable voice training. She compliments my outfit, I compliment hers. She tells me I need to shave my armpits if I want to look like a real woman. My two friends stand up for me and yell at her. They assure me she was just being an asshole, that women were supposed to be hairy, but I can't help but notice how both of them have hairy armpits and yet the "advice" targeted me. The wide range of bodies that people here tonight find desirable on cis women don't seem to apply to the women like me. I am the only one of us that doesn't go home with a hookup at the end of the night. I realize now she likely spoke from experience. I am still hurt by her words, but realizing the kinds of experiences she must have had herself to feel her words were kind advice hurts far worse.

A local queer photographer who's work I follow is looking for women & non-binary models for a photoshoot. I have become comfortable with getting photos taken of me for the first time in my life since my egg cracked, and had a few small time modeling gigs under my belt. With something like this I could actually have the beginnings of a portfolio. I reach and am told that they are not looking for trans women models, "only women and AFABs". Getting the same line I get from agencies from an independent queer photographer repackaged in "woke" terminology stings. I see many queer and nonbinary models I looked up to take part in the shoot. I have to wonder if they knew that the photographer's definition of woman didn't include trans women, or if like me in my martial arts class they noticed no transfems were there but didn't think much of it because there were other trans people there.

It is years ago and I am still an egg. I am with my partner of 4 years. I am exhausted after a long day. She asks me for sex in the voice that I know means saying no will hurt her. I learned from her long ago men have high and insatiable sex drives, therefore saying no meant I wanted to have sex, just not with her. So I say yes. The sex is painful and unsatisfying, and I simply do my best to thrust through the discomfort until she cums. I feel numb and hurt. She enjoys herself but seems sad I did not cum. I assure her I love her. When we hold eachother after my obligation has been met and I finally feel comfortable and safe. We begin talking. She talks about the trashy women she saw on the street today, describing their cringe outfits and ugly styles and bad hair. All the styles and clothes and hair I yearn to try myself in my deepest and most repressed desires. I change the subject and ask her about work and family. She asks if I'd still love her if she were a man and I say yes. She says she would still love me if I were a woman. Something in that statement feels like a lie. It is months later when we break up and I move out. Now that I am a woman I look back and know from our years together that if I were a woman then she'd hate the kind of woman I'd become. That if I were a woman she'd still have the same expectations of me as a man, that her refusal of sex equated an impersonal not being in the mood but my refusal of sex equated a cruel refusal of love.

A lesbian group begins organizing a queer woman's strip night event. A safe place for amateur performers to shine and women to perform and enjoy sexuality away from the male gaze. I see no transfems in the promotional material or leadership team, and I've learned not to think nothing of it just because there are other trans people there. I do not go.

I am talking with my therapist. They are trans too and an amazing therapist, often providing insights and advice only someone else with the lived experience of being trans can. I express distress and suicidal ideation at the fact I feel like I need to pass before I can dress the way I want. That until I get expensive hair removal procedures and FFS I can never feel safe and welcome presenting authentically. I lament how these things are expensive and may never be accessible to me. They tell me I need to deal with my "internalized transphobia", as if these feelings aren't a result of constant rejection and othering by external forces even within queer spaces. As if the scrap of womanhood others sometimes acknowledge in me does not rely on their perceptions of me.

There is a publication accepting works from trans people of all stripes to document trans experiences. It gets flamed for not having a single transfem as a contributor. The people behind it apologize profusely, they say didn't notice no transfems had sent work in and would do a sequel publication that was transfem-centric. I wonder if anyone had noticed there were no transfems but didn't think much of it because there were other trans people there. I think about the kinds of spaces I've seen like that, and the implications it has about how they treat transfems, and I am unsurprised no transfems submitted.

One of my closest friends for years is very supportive of me when I first begin crossdressing and experimenting with they/them pronouns. She gives me suggestions on cute clothes to wear and takes me shopping as well as asks for pictures. We had helped eachother discover we were both queer as young teens, come to terms with it, and navigate it in a hostile environment, so I have complete trust. We are close enough we are frequently asking eachother advice on serious life choices & relationships, sending nudes for critique + tips before sending them to our partners, and sharing our most secret and vulnerable moments. She often asks me for tips on getting her straight boyfriends into pegging and crossdressing that make me slightly uncomfortable but I don't mind, she is a loyal friend I would endure a great many discomforts for. I host a lunch for us one day, and come out to her as a trans woman. I tell her my new name, say I no longer use he/him pronouns, and thank her for her support on my journey thus far. She launches into a monologue about how by changing my name I am throwing away all our memories together and spitting in the face of my family. Taken aback by her sudden heel turn after being so supportive of me being nonbinary and GNC, I excuse myself to go to the bathroom to get a break and give her some time to process. When I am in the bathroom trying not to cry, she is on the phone. I overhear her misgendering me as she is talking about me being bisexual in a frightened voice. She sounds truly afraid that I intend to be sexually violent towards her. When I leave the bathroom and sit back down I pretend not to have heard. She gets off the phone, saying she was just chatting with her boyfriend. We talk a bit longer, she explains how "the surgery" is dangerous and experimental and she hopes I won't get it. I assure her I won't and do my best to change the subject and hope she comes around after some time to process things, hurt and shocked that what I saw as a natural shift in the path I was already on marked me as frightening in her eyes after knowing eachother for over a decade. That a fellow bisexual suddenly saw my bisexuality as dangerous now that I was asserting myself as a trans woman. I say goodbye to her, and she says goodbye to me using my deadname, I do not risk an argument to correct her. It is months after the meeting we have not seen eachother since and she has not responded to any messages I sent. After reflecting on her reaction further I decide that I don't really want to spend time with someone who thinks these things about me for my own safety and mental health, regardless of our history. A friend of 14 years who supported my queerness and transness gone the instant I crossed an intangible woman-shaped line that marked me as a predator and invader in her eyes.

I log online and day after day see trans women getting banned and harassed. Seeing baseless callout posts calling them groomers and abusers getting taken seriously by other queer and trans people. Seeing proof that deep down so many people I consider kindred spirits see me and people like me as worthy of intense scrutiny and policing to keep "the queer community" safe and united. The blocklist grows but everything stays the same. I treasure the people in my life who don't take part in this and would do anything for them, but it seems they get fewer each time.

I'm not making this post to seek sympathy, I am used to this kind of shit and far worse has happened to myself and others. I just make this to illustrate transmisogyny is not some "online-only" issue like people claim. Even if online issues weren't "real" (as healed is fond of saying, "online is real") this has tangible effects in the way trans women are treated offline as well. By communities, friends, partners, colleagues, systems, etc. That's why we talk about it.

So much of the discussions people have paint transmisogyny as some online oppression olympics maliciously trying to divide the community, smear transmascs, and "reinvent bioessentialism". That is not what it is about. Discussions about transmisogyny is about how we are treated for being what we are, and while related to transphobia and misogyny it is seperate because it often represents doors other trans people and women can walk through that transfems cannot. It has affected me in my most intimate moments when I was with other trans and queer people I felt safe around, and taught me that I need to carefully manage my persona and presentation at all times lest my authenticity be branded "male socialization". I am even terrified to express attraction to people who express attraction towards me because I'm so used to being treated like a predator upon reciprocating or being used and abandoned by people I trusted. I am terrified to be too excited about shared interests with friends lest I be too loud or talkative about it and branded with aggressive male socialization. So I make myself quiet and small, and shrink from the community and people I care about, and become more and more isolated.

Anyways, stop platforming anons who spread lies about trans women, stop hopping on TERF harassment campaigns because the trans gal they're smearing "gave you bad vibes", and maybe consider carefully if in your own life where you draw the line for a transfem's behavior is any different from where you'd draw the line for anyone who's not one.

I turn to Ares.

Thanks to Tyler Miles Lockett who allowed me to draw inspiration from his ARES piece for page 2! Look at his etsy page it's SICK

⚔️ If you want to read some queer retelling of arturian legends have a look at my webtoon

looking for fics about your favorite character on ao3 be like:

dont care

dont care

dont care

what the actual fuck

dont care

ooh that sounds- what the fuck

unfinished

don't care

the best fic ive ever read in my life. this absolutely ruined me and ill never be the same ever again

dont care

I s2g you guys are spoiling me and i can see your tags JXBSBSB @battlekilt @ladyv-aka-via 😭😭😭

Rexwalker 💙🌟

captain rex with a dixie cup background i guess!!!!!!