HOW AM I A WHORE?

BAHAH pls i need a fic where ellie’s cockblocking gets to the point where aaron is desperately asking auntie penelope or jj to babysit her and jack for a night.. he would even entrust spencer for a few hours if nobody else was available just for some alone time😫🤭

on hiatus

this concept is so funny i love it cw; mentions of sex (nothing explicit), brief suggestive content, bau teasing aaron, reader referred to as mom, dad!aaron wc; 1k

"Can't you ask?"

"Well, I could." Aaron's gaze shot to the side, through the blinds and down into the bullpen.

"It wouldn't hurt, right? Because I don't know about you, but I can't wait another night." You exhaled, a slight buzzing effect coming through the phone as a result.

"I'm right there with you." Aaron admitted, resisting the urge to squirm in his seat. "I'm seconds away from reinstalling that damn crib."

"So ask. Anyways, I gotta go. Jack will be home soon, and I should get Ellie up so she does sleep tonight."

Aaron chuckled softly, his eyes finding the family photo framed on his desk. "Why does it not surprise me that for nap time, she'll stay in her bed."

"Stubborn. Just like her father."

After saying goodbye to you, Aaron exited his office, heading to where JJ, Penelope and Derek were all congregating. Their eyes rose as he approached.

"What brings you down here?" JJ asked, using her feet to twist her chair back and forth. "We're not dawdling, I swear."

He brushed past her playful - and untrue - comment. "Need a favor."

Brief distress flashed on Derek's face. "If it requires more paperwork, just give it to Reid."

Like you had said, there was no harm in asking. "It has nothing to do with paperwork. Just in need of a babysitter for tonight."

Penelope's hand shot up, eyes brightening. "Me."

"Big Friday night eh?" Derek wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. "What's on the agenda, where the two of you headin'?"

"Nowhere." Aaron shrugged nonchalantly, a smidge of embarrassment heating his face. He was hoping he could persuade with minimal details. "It'll only be for a few hours. We just need them out of the house."

"Oh," JJ smirked after a moment, accompanied with a touch of sympathy. Out of all people, she would understand. "I see."

Aaron met her eyes, keeping his face still but with subtle pleading, hoping she'd tune into it. One that read: I'm begging you not to elaborate.

They were adults. It wasn't a topic of taboo. He just wasn't just too partial on openly discussing his sex life with his colleagues. Doesn't matter how long he's known them.

"Need some, mommy and daddy time, don't you?"

Aaron's stern expression continued to linger, but gradually softened in confirmation. He was tired; tired of waiting and being on the brink.

"No wonder you've been so grumpy."

Aaron shot Morgan a look, before stating his case. "Ellie's out of her crib now. She's learned that the world still continues to go on past bedtime."

"She's out of her crib?" Penelope aww'ed, her bottom lip pouting in bittersweetness.

"And comes into our room," Aaron paused, "every night."

For the first few nights, Ellie had stayed put; the excitement and newness of it all enough to keep her in bed. However, it didn't take long for her to realize she could simply, get up.

She'd come into the living room - you'd usher her back into bed. Jack would come out a while later, complaining Ellie had gone into his room and awoken him - Aaron's turn to return her to bed.

Then came the excuses. She needed water (a sippy cup was given to her, and told this meant she had to go to sleep now). She wanted to watch a movie and "cuddle, please?" It took everything in Aaron to decline, especially after she played up the sweetness in her big, brown eyes.

You'd think after all that, she'd exhausted herself, but no. Next came her crawling into bed with the two of you.

That's where the matter currently stood. She didn't want to sleep in her new big girl bed, but rather, the big bed. Right in the middle, snug between the two of you, and keeping your plans on hiatus.

The next night, you had thought you were in the clear. But sure enough, the second Aaron was straddled atop you, his lips trailing your skin and leaving you breathless, did little footsteps make their way down the hall. Aaron would roll off you instead, supporting himself on an elbow, while you laid there defeatedly, anticipating the opening of your bedroom door.

And again the following night, the same occurrence of events. Admittedly it's been a while since the two of you have been intimate, due to a certain toddler and cases taking Aaron out of town.

Derek laughed, "She's a little menace. I love that kid."

Aaron sighed, both his frustration and need only growing more. His voice wavered on the desperate side, "So can one of you? Please. Just a few hours is all I'm asking."

"I'd be happy to relieve you two. For a full night even, Henry and Michael would love to have Jack and Ellie sleepover." JJ offered, and Aaron internally let out a deep sigh of relief. "Will and I have been there, I get it."

"I-"

"And Aunt Penelope can come too, don't worry." JJ interrupted Penelope with a smile, reaching over and giving her hand a gentle tap.

"I'd- We'd appreciate it. Thank you." Aaron's shoulders dropped, and he could already feel the tension leaving his body. A rush of energy swept through him too, anticipating the delightfully, now long, night ahead. He could not wait to get home.

His thoughts were put on hold when he noticed the glint in JJ's eyes.

"And so you can relieve yourself."

Derek cackled while Aaron rolled his eyes, turning away from the group to hide his smile.

"Just let me know what time you want them over."

Older Brother Hotch hits me in the feels almost as hard as Daddy Hotch.

Watching him being exasperated over Sean being a stupid dumb baby validates my Oldest Child Syndrome.

streaming companies will say um we're increasing your subscription fee. no password sharing. no screenshots allowed. please subscribe to a separate channel for this movie and another for this tv show. free trial but put in your card details so we can charge you if you forget to cancel. this title is a rental only that's 4.99 please. this title is not available in your region. you are begging people to torrent at this point Like ye are off the edge of the map matey here there be pirates argh argh argh 🦜☠️

That's my first comic, I hope it's not too bad (*´﹃｀*)

Maybe I'll color it later, but I like this version

Love the horny, horny old man 🫶🏻

Descend | Aaron Hotchner

Synopsis: You and Jack plan out a surprise birthday party for Aaron, but it's hard to keep secrets while dating a profiler. — part 4 of (1 , 2 , 3 ... can be read as a standalone)

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Younger (Of Age) F!Reader

Warnings: best friend's father trope, fluff, sassy jack hotchner, allusions to smut

Your mind was running three miles a minute as you ramble out an endless list of party supplies and worries. Jack is sitting in the passenger seat as you drive, and you're being very careful as you brake (since Jack had once told you he'd get a concussion one day from your driving).

"Streamers, balloons... oh gosh, I hope that Aaron isn't called away for a case, could you imagine that?... Oh! Do you think we should get a cake from the bakery by 8th street? He liked the cupcakes I got from there... Fuck... his birthday is in two days, why did I wait so long to get supplies!" You speak rapidly, tapping the steering wheel anxiously as Jack queues up some songs.

Your best friend raises his eyebrows in amusement and shakes his head. "You have got to calm down. My dad will like anything you do for him. Hell, you could probably just text him 'Happy Birthday' and he'll be all smiles for the rest of the day."

"This is serious, Jack!" You huff with a small worried frown. "Birthdays are so complicated." A defeated groan falls from your lips.

"Just do what I do for Leah. I get her some flowers and take her to dinner for her birthday." Jack tries to placate you, smiling a bit boyishly as he talks about his girlfriend.

You snort softly and tease him playfully. "In other words... the bare minimum?" You joke and make a right turn into the party supply store parking lot.

"First of all, fuck you." Jack quips back lightheartedly, waiting until you park the car to flick your arm.

Despite Jack's insistence that Aaron wasn't expecting anything huge for his birthday, your best friend allows you to drag him around town as you raid store shelves and make numerous phone calls to local bakeries.

Unfortunately, your mind is a prolific river of anxieties as you are suddenly hit with the realization that you're dating a profiler of all people. When the next morning rolls around, your newest concern was that Aaron would catch on to your plans to throw him a surprise party.

It was nearing seven in the morning, and it was the day before Aaron's birthday. You couldn't sleep too well, the gnawing worries of things going askew tormenting you even as you rested, twisting your stomach into knots.

Feeling a tightening against your stomach, you blush a little as you look down and remember just where you were. You had decided to spend the night at Aaron's house again, and you both had stayed up quite late.

You feel a soft kiss being pressed to the back of your neck. "Are you up, sweetheart?" His gruff morning voice fills your ears as he pulls you even closer to his body.

"Mhm... you're up early too..." You mumble back and run your hand along his arm.

"Felt you twisting and turning." He grumbles back softly as he yawns a litte, shuffling for a moment before returning to his previous movements of kissing down your neck and back.

You smile softly and the butterflies in your stomach flutter as you speak lightly. "Do you have the day off today?"

You were torn. A part of you was hoping he would so that you could spend the day with him, but another part of you hoped he'd be at the office so you could go pick up his cake and his gift.

"I do. How should we spend it, I wonder..." He says almost mischievously, his warm hand laying flat against your stomach and rubbing it before sliding lower.

"Well, unless you want to wake Jack up..." you trail off and smile widely, teasing him back by stopping his hand.

He grunts, dipping his head to kiss and suck on the junction between your neck and shoulder. That was definitely going to leave a hickey. "We can be quiet." He mumbles against your skin.

"Horny old man." You grumble playfully.

Aaron chuckles deeply, voice still a bit rough from sleep as he moves to lean over you. "Yes, yes, now let me love you."

By the time you manage to escape Aaron's sinful temptations and addicting touch, it's closer to nine am. He decides to take a shower as you head down to start making breakfast after brushing your teeth.

When you step into the kitchen, you see Jack rubbing his eyes as he sits at the kitchen island. "For Christmas I want noise cancelling headphones and for you guys to soundproof the bedroom." He muses without even looking up at you, texting on his phone.

You cringe a little and mentally kick yourself. "I'm so sorry..."

Jack waves you off, yawning and stretching his arms above his head. "I'm just pulling your leg, I was able to fall back asleep. Besides, 's not like I haven't put you through the same."

You shiver a little at the memories of waking up to Jack's varying shenanigans in adjacent rooms during trips with your friend group. "I think we should both just gift each other noise cancelling headphones."

"Yeah... well I'm staying over at Leah's tomorrow night, so go crazy." He says, smiling as he gets another text from his girlfriend. "Oh, and speaking of tomorrow, did you need me to help set up for the party?"

You groan at the thought. Ideally, Aaron would be at the office for a couple of hours today so you could go pick up some things, and then be gone until the evening tomorrow so you could set up for the party.

"Still not sure about that... Aaron doesn't have work today, and I'm not sure about tomorrow either." Your tone is low as you start grabbing ingredients from the fridge.

Jack huffs, clearly understanding your dilemma. "I can try and get him out of the house tomorrow if he doesn't have to work. Have a father-son bonding day or something."

You nod and smile. "Yes, please." You smile appreciatively.

"You're on your own today though, Leah wants to get lunch with me." Jack says playfully.

"So your usefulness does have a limit." You quip back with a deadpan look.

Later in the day, you slip away to make a quick phone call after coming up with an idea to get Aaron out of the house.

"This is Dave." You hear the older man's voice ring out.

You clear your throat softly. "Hi Dave. It's me, I need a favor."

"Ah, I was wondering when I'd hear from you." David chuckles. "Is the party still happening tomorrow?" He asks kindly.

"Yes, it is. The rest of the team is still able to make it, right?" You ask softly, keeping your voice hushed as you can hear Aaron shuffling around downstairs.

"Yep, our schedules are cleared for tomorrow. Y'know, Aaron was rushing to finish his paperwork all week, he wanted to get the weekend off to spend it with you and Jack." He says with a teasing lilt in his voice.

You wince a little in guilt and sigh. "Ah... Well, actually... would it be possible for you to call Aaron into the office for like... two hours? I need to go pick up some things for him last minute."

"He's going to bite my head off, kiddo." David muses, sounding resigned to that fact already.

"You have seniority, you'll be okay." You say and chuckle.

You hear the man sigh a little before chuckling fondly. "Alright, I'll think of something."

Exhaling in relief, you thank the man profusely before hanging up.

You slowly retreat from the quiet room, almost walking directly into Aaron's chest as you close the door behind you. "Oh!"

"There you are, honey. What were you doing in the towel closet?" Aaron asks in amusement, curiosity filling his tone. You could see the gears in his head turning as he sees your phone in your hand.

"Phone call." You explain simply, leaning up to kiss him. "Also, Jack heard us this morning." You grumble and playfully smack his chest, trying to change the topic.

Aaron frowns a little at that and rubs your back. "He needs to move out." He says jokingly while maintaining his serious expression.

Chuckling, you pat his chest and shake your head. "Now, now, we both know you'd cry if that were to actually happen."

Luckily, Dave actually manages to come up with some excuse for Aaron to drop by the office not even an hour later. Your boyfriend is grumbling the whole time he gets ready, and you felt guilty seeing his mood drop.

"He said it'd be quick, right? Just in and out." You say softly, kissing him while fixing up his tie.

"Yeah... I'll be back soon, okay?" He reassures you, cupping your cheek and stroking his thumb across your soft skin. He gazes into your eyes before bringing you in for a deeper kiss. "I love you." He whispers against your lips.

"I love you, too." You whisper back with a giddy smile, leaning into him as he runs his hands down your body.

When Aaron finally makes his way out of the house and toward his car, Jack is getting back home from his date at the same time.

Jack looks at him in surprise and smiles a bit as he takes in his father's appearance. "Hey, dad. Going to work?"

Aaron nods and glances back at the house quickly. "Just for a bit. What time should I be out of the house tomorrow?"

Jack pauses and blanches. "Uh... what?"

"So Y/N has time to set up for the surprise party." Aaron answers with a fond grin, chuckling a bit to himself.

"You knew?" Jack deflates a bit and sighs.

"Yeah, I figured it out this morning." Aaron says, remembering the way you were lost in thought all day, with Dave's 'work emergency' call just confirming his suspicions.

Jack nods and smiles a bit in defeat. "Alright... Uhm, you should leave the house at like two tomorrow. Also, can you just pretend to be surprised tomorrow? She's been super stressed these past few days."

Aaron chuckles and nods, patting Jack on the shoulder before walking toward his car, speaking up a bit as he walks. "Don't worry, I was planning on it."

True to his words, and to your absolute cluelessness, Aaron plays up his delighted surprise the next day when his team members surprise him in his living room. Though, it wasn't too difficult considering how you and Jack had transformed the house in the time he was gone.

Seeing your beaming face across the room made going to the office all day worth it. As he thanked everyone for coming, he couldn't help but think about how he'd love to spend the rest of his birthdays with you.

As the night continues, genuine surprise colors his face when you finally give him your birthday gift to him after everyone settles down in the kitchen to eat.

He flips through the booklet you hand him with complete wonderment, looking at the various professional photos you had taken of yourself posed in lingerie. The photos looked like something straight out of a magazine, and your otherworldly beauty had his knees growing weak.

"Happy birthday, honey." You whisper sweetly into his ear, kissing his neck as his mind malfunctions for a moment. "Also... we have the house to ourselves tonight."

His hand moves down to grip your hip, softly groaning into your ear. "Is it too soon to tell everyone to get out of the house?"

You smile and kiss his jaw, pulling away from him and shaking your head. "Now, don't be like that. They're here to celebrate you after all." With that, you disappear into the kitchen as Aaron gazes after you in utter worship.

"Wicked, wicked woman." Aaron mumbles to no one in particular as he forces himself to go put the booklet away to rejoin the party.

He really couldn't wait for his next birthday.

hotch + final moments

some people live their lives without even being obsessed with some guy. if you call that living

not now. mommys making a 0 note post

happy halloween 🎃