Leftinblasphemy - Fₗₒwₑᵣ

Me facing my problems

Senryū XI

We are not yet found ,

universe takes and gives us

whatever should be .

-t.f.s.

Franz Kafka, from a diary entry featured in "The Diaries of Franz Kafka,"

Poet is a storm.

I am writing in directions hoping to find the answer,

losing myself in a spiral of unworthiness,

my crazy mind recreated loneliness.

I needed to release the chaos with word,

moulding them into power coming

through a heart of glass that's glowing.

Formed a shape that only words

could come through a mind,

shaving the mud from my arms

to distract the miserable feeling

that caught me off guard.

I myself am not the best writer,

but if my poetry was made of gold,

If my soul burns in fire (motivation),

then i'm proud to be a storm.

-t.f.s.

- j (x)

Sometimes i think that your eyes are poison and it makes me go out of control.

-t.f.s.

I know.

I know that when I try to take my pain, It's temporary feeling and It still hurts like a thousand times of breaking. My breath leaves my body and It won't let me think properly. It's taking too long to go back to my stable mode. It just burns my whole skin like sun, and gravity is no needed in my head,it just throws my oxygen away. But I need that oxygen. I need that life like I need the homemade bread in the morning, the sweetness...it's taking me back where I used to have a comfort zone. And happiness- just me running down the garden with flowers in a sunny day,having a place to seat on and watch the smiley sky.

And I need that..that patience that takes too much time on my self-improvement,because I still am not blooming yet. I'm trying..I'm learning to stay alive.

-t.f.s.

- your words could be a flicker to somebody's heart,

but a scar to someone else's arm.

Life is not all about sad things ,

and it's not about promises ,

it's not only about happiness ,

It's about to feed your own need ,

and to smile to images no one can ,

as you make your breath the air

the others can breathe together

and life can change you ,

it can crush you, break you ,

torn you apart ,

but what it's inside

it is never lost.

-t.f.s.

Can't wait.

Vanitas no Carte 2nd Cour »» Coming Jan. 2022

Somewhere in northern Italy

“If I could have him like this in my dreams every night of my life, I'd stake my entire life on dreams and be done with the rest.” - André Aciman, Call me by your Name