✨ Frames Of The Day ✨

i was yapping at @sazzynatural about my hurdle headcanon and then my hand slipped and now here we are, i guess!

"Hey, Evan?"

"Yeah?" Buck calls, from where he's checking through his cupboards, making a shopping list. Tommy doesn't respond immediately and he turns back from where he's surveying the spice rack to look at him. "What's up?"

Tommy has that fond look on his face that, as far as Buck is concerned, might as well just be what his face looks like. The way that Tommy looks at him lights him up inside. He doesn't think anyone has ever looked at him that way, the way that he catches Tommy looking, so soft and endeared, like just looking at Buck makes him happy. It's - 

"I love you."

Buck's heartbeat roars in his ears. 

"Y-you - um. What? No, wait, I mean. I heard you. Tommy, that's - "

"Evan." He still looks fond, and that should be impossible, because Buck is screwing up, he has ring-side seats to this, is actively watching himself screw up, and Tommy's still looking at him like - like that. "Stop spiraling. You don't need to say it back, I just wanted you to - "

"No, no, it's not - uh - I, uh. I said I'd meet Maddie for coffee during her shift and if I don't leave now I'm gonna be late, so I, um. C-can we talk about this later? O-over dinner, maybe?"

Tommy's shoulders slump a little at that. "Uh. Sure. If you like."

"Uh-huh, yeah, that'd be great, I'll be back, don't uh - don't go anywhere, I won't be long, I just really - really need to get that coffee with Maddie, I can't be late but uh - that's - that's great, Tommy."

He sees Tommy's eyebrows go up, sees him mouth great, and then he's out the door.

Oh, shit.

***

The drive to dispatch goes in a blur, and he must look pretty freaked out because as soon as Maddie sees him, she quickly finishes her call and drags him into the breakroom.

"What's wrong?" she asks.

"I - I thought we could get coffee," Buck says lamely, and she gives him the big sister eyebrows. "Really," Buck says a bit frantically. "Can - can we have coffee?"

Maddie rolls her eyes, but she pours them both a coffee and hands him his, putting the table between them and leaning against it.

"I have fifteen minutes. Talk."

"Tommy said he loves me," Buck blurts.

"Buck, wow. That's amazing." Maddie's eyes widen at him over her coffee cup. "Wait. Not amazing?"

"I didn't - uh. I didn't say it back?" Buck says, and feels his heart sink. 

"Wait, you didn't?" Maddie tilts her head, looks honestly baffled. Which - fair. Buck is a little obsessed. "Do you - not?"

Of course I do, Buck thinks. How could I not?

"I - I'm being intentional," Buck says, and it sounds hollow already. "I don't wanna rush it and I had like - a timeline."

"Did - did you tell him about the timeline?"

"N-not in so many words," Buck admits.

"Evan! Please tell me you didn't just run out on the poor guy," Maddie pleads, over the sound of the breakroom door opening again. Buck doesn't even care about a potential audience, he's so suddenly miserable at the way he left Tommy at the loft.

"I - I didn't run," he says although - it was probably a close thing. "I…I told him I had to get coffee with you and we'd talk about it later," he admits, his voice getting smaller with every word.

Maddie's face does the thing - the scrunched up pout like she's holding back on telling him that he's a damn moron. Buck scrubs his hands over his face.

"Is this Buck's hot pilot?" Josh asks from where he's pouring coffee.

Buck hears Maddie's mm-hm. 

"He said he loves me," he says, still hiding behind his hands.

"Con…gratulations?" Josh says dubiously. "Or, how awful for you? I'm really not clear on the desired response here."

"He thinks it's too soon," Maddie says. "He had a timeline. Which he did not share."

"We were taking it slow!" 

"I hate to break it to you, but the way that man looks at you is not slow," Josh says.

"He's not wrong," Maddie says, and Buck hangs his head. Because they're right. They're both right.

"Look, you know me. I stumble into things, I end up too serious too fast and it blows up in my face. I - I really didn't want it to blow up in my face. And then he just goes and - and looks at me like that, and says that, and I don't - guys, I think I really screwed up."

Maddie gives him a sympathetic look. 

Josh gives him a deeply, deeply unsympathetic one. "Oh, I have totally dated a Tommy."

"I'm sorry, what?" Buck glares at Josh who looks supremely unimpressed.

"Calm down, ankles," he tuts, and Buck is absolutely going to kill Eddie. Or Chim. He's going to kill someone. How does everyone know about that? "I said I dated a Tommy, your man's virtue is safe."

"What does that mean, you dated a Tommy?"

"Look, not everyone knows when they're five like me, and not everyone goes from adorably clueless to out and proud as fast as you. Sometimes, and I know this might be a little revolutionary for you, Buck, but sometimes the queer experience? Fucking miserable for a really long time. So sometimes you just want to grab happiness where you can find it, as soon as you find it."

Buck thinks about the things he's learned about Tommy over the months they've been seeing each other, each one a little treasure to be hoarded, a part of the puzzle that makes up the man that he already can't imagine life without - the asshole father, the dead mom, the army, the closet, the loneliness - and he wants to slap himself. 

His phone buzzes in his pocket and he pulls it out, his heart sinking further at the message Tommy's sent.

Do you want me to cancel the reservation?

Buck turns his phone to show Maddie and Josh the message.

"What reservation?" Maddie asks

"Dinner," Buck says miserably. "Date night."

"Okay," Josh says. "Some of us are supposed to be working and don't have time for your little baby bi crisis. Evan Buckley, are you actually going to fumble that man? Before you answer, be aware that two thirds of the population of WeHo will get a hard-on the moment he's back on the market even if they won't know why."

"He's not going back on the market," Buck snaps. "I just - I just need to talk to him."

"There we go," Josh says, rolling his eyes and disappearing with his mug of coffee, and an idiot called back over his shoulder.

Maddie's a little kinder, hugging him quickly. "Tell him how you feel, Buck. Talk it out."

***

By the time Buck gets back to the loft, he has another message from Tommy.

Hey, I headed back to my place. Let me know if you want to talk, or if you want dinner. I'm sorry if that was too much. It doesn't have to change anything.

"Goddamnit," Buck grumbles, throwing the Jeep back into gear. The drive to Tommy's has never felt so long, and he sits outside for long enough that the neighbor across the street is just openly staring through the blinds. It's enough to propel him out of the car and up to the door.

It takes Tommy a minute to answer when Buck knocks and he looks - surprised to see him, honestly. Buck feels a horrible twist of guilt.

"Can I come in?"

"Evan. Of course. You want a coffee or something?"

"No," Buck says, trailing Tommy into the kitchen. "I - I did have one with Maddie, I'm kinda…vibrating out of my skin enough as it is."

"I'm sorry. That's not what I was aiming for."

"Y-you don't need to be - Tommy, I - "

"Hey, look, it's fine," Tommy says, and it looks like he really believes it. Like it really is completely fine that he told Buck he loves him and Buck's response was to buffer internally for a minute and then run out of his own damn apartment like his ass was on fire. Tommy taps his knuckles on the table between them in what Buck recognises as a nervous gesture. "I know that I'm not - I'm not the forever guy, and that's okay. I didn't say it to make you say it back. I said it because it's true and I wanted you to know."

"What are you talking about?"

"That I - " Tommy honestly looks a little puzzled. "What I said, this morning. It wasn't - there weren't any strings attached."

"You're not the forever guy? What the hell does that mean?"

"Just that - that I know I'm not exactly a…long-term prospect, and that's okay."

Okay? It's so far from okay. It's the worst thing Buck has ever heard.

"How are you not a long-term prospect? That's - that's the dumbest thing I ever heard, take that back."

"Evan. I used the L word and you couldn't get out of there fast enough. It's okay. You don't have to try to make me feel better. It's fine."

"It's not fine," Buck snaps, rounding the table to get closer to Tommy, catching hold of his wrist. "I'm not - look, I had a timeline, which, Maddie pointed out I didn't actually tell you about that, so that's my bad. But it was a timeline for me, to stop me going too fast and falling too hard and - and going full Buck. I didn't expect that you would - "

"Stomp all over this mysterious timeline?" Tommy asks, his eyebrows going up.

"And I'm now realizing how stupid that was. Did - did you mean it?"

"Evan. Of course I meant it." He glances down at where Buck is still squeezing his wrist, not quite holding his hand "I - honestly, I didn't think it would come as a surprise, I'm not exactly - "

"I love you."

Tommy blinks. "Evan - "

"Please believe me. Tommy. God, I screwed this up so bad, but - I do. I do love you. You are the forever guy. You're my forever guy. I promise. I just - I was just scared. But about me, not about you. Never about you. Tommy, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I - "

"Evan. Say it again."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

Buck lets himself sway forward, lets his forehead meet Tommy's shoulder. "Not the forever guy. You're a goddamn idiot is what you are."

"I'm your idiot," Tommy promises, and Buck laughs shakily.

They love each other. They love each other.

Lou Ferrigno Jr's smile. Reblog if you agree.

Ships

Week Ending October 28th, 2024

Bucktommy +19 Evan Buckley & Tommy Kinard, 9-1-1

Billford Bill Cipher & Ford Pines, Gravity Falls

Phan -2 Daniel Howell & Phil Lester, YouTubers

Buddie +7 Evan Buckley & Edmundo Diaz, 9-1-1

Agathario -1 Agatha Harkness & Rio Vidal, Agatha All Along

Poolverine -3 Wade Wilson & Logan Howlett, the Marvel universe

Megop +2 Megatron & Optimus Prime, Transformers

Lestappen Charles Leclerc & Max Verstappen, Formula 1 drivers

Satosugu -2 Gojo Satoru & Geto Suguru, Jujutsu Kaisen

Fiddauthor -4 Fiddleford McGucket & Stanford Pines, Gravity Falls

Ineffable Husbands +1 Aziraphale & Crowley, Good Omens

Narilamb Narinder & the Lamb, Cult of the Lamb

Zosan -5 Roronoa Zoro & Vinsmoke Sanji, One Piece

Farcille +4 Falin Touden & Marcille Donato, Dungeon Meshi

Ivantill Ivan & Till, Alien Stage

Symbrock Venom (symbiote) & Eddie Brock, the Marvel universe

Loustat -3 Louis de Pointe du Lac & Lestat de Lioncourt, Interview with the Vampire

Destiel -13 Dean Winchester & Castiel, Supernatural

Radioapple Lucifer Morningstar & Alastor, Hazbin Hotel

Bakudeku -5 Bakugou Katsuki & Midoriya Izuku, Boku no Hero Academia

The number in italics indicates how many spots a ship moved up or down from the previous week. Bolded ships weren’t on the list last week.

✨ frames of the day ✨

💔 i miss tommy kinard ꒰(˶◞ ‸ ◟˶)꒱

boyfriends

celebration: housewarming party with the 118 at tommy's house proposal: a little silly one but they take it seriously

“I guess what I’m saying is,” Tommy says, even as he dutifully carries a bowl overloaded with tortilla chips and another bowl equally overloaded with seven layer dip, “I don’t understand why we’re having a house-warming party if I’ve lived here for ten years.” He sets his cargo down on the table, then leans one hand on it and turns to face his boyfriend.

“Right, but I haven’t,” Evan says, trailing into the living room with two huge platters of his own (a big bowl of potato chips, and a homemade French onion dip that Tommy had snuck a taste of and nearly went cross eyed, it was that good). He gently places them down, then nudges Tommy’s bowls around a quarter of an inch at a time until their placement is to his liking.

God, Tommy loves him a lot. 

He’s lucky Evan loves him a lot, too, because he steals a tortilla chip out of the bowl and takes a healthy scoop out of the seven layer dip, and the barely concealed scowl on Evan’s face suggests he’d be getting his hand slapped and his ass kicked out of the house until the guests arrive, if only he didn’t love Tommy so much.

“Oh, my God,” Tommy moans around his mouthful. “Baby, did you make guacamole from scratch?” Evan’s expression smooths out into something more smug, more pleased, and this time he only flinches slightly when Tommy goes back in for seconds. 

“Marry me,” Tommy jokingly garbles around another huge bite of chip and dip, not really thinking much of it until Evan’s breath hitches.

Tommy forcibly swallows before he is necessarily ready to, the tortilla chip scratching his throat all the way down, but before he can ask Evan…anything, the doorbell rings. 

That quiet little expression of want that Evan had been wearing disappears when he swears and bolts back into the kitchen. “Can you get that?” he shouts. “I need to grab the plates and utensils!”

“Yeah,” Tommy says, and has to clear his throat when his voice cracks over the words. “Yeah, I’ve got it.”

When he opens the door, he’s got pretty much the entire A shift of the 118 crammed onto his porch. Right at the front is Jee-Yun, who breaks away from her mother’s hold just to slam into Tommy’s midsection. “Uncle Tommy!” she shouts, then holds her arms straight up at him. “Pick me up.”

Tommy makes a show of it, grunting and groaning, pretending that Jee weighs seven times more than she does. When he’s finally got her set on his hip, he pants and wipes the back of his hand over his brow, trying and failing not to smile at the sound of her bright little giggles. 

“Oh, I see how it is,” Chim drawls from the doorway, clapping Tommy on the shoulder as he steps inside. “You save a guy’s life and all he cares about is your kid.” He winks and elbows Tommy, not unkindly.

“Hey, Howie,” Tommy says, just as warmly. “Hi, Maddie,” he says as Evan’s sister steps over the threshold. He’s always a little nervous around Maddie, even though she’s never been anything but kind and supportive of her and Evan, but he can’t help it when he knows how much Evan values her opinion. 

She gives him a smile and a tilt of the head like she knows, before stepping into his other side and giving him a hug just as warm as her daughter’s. “Hi, Tommy,” she says, and reaches up to gently pat him on the cheek twice before stepping away. Once her mom leaves, Jee just wants to be put down, so Tommy obliges, and about ten seconds later hears her shout for her Uncle Buck. 

Hen and Karen are the next in, giving him a bottle of wine and a set of glasses to go with it. Neither of them are particularly affectionate as they walk in, bar Karen squeezing him lightly on the forearm, but he knows from experience that once they get into their cups, that will change. 

Ravi’s next with two six packs of craft beer that he presses into Tommy’s arms before beelining to the snack table. Tommy laughs under his breath and sets the beer on the ground when he realizes that Bobby and Athena are the last to wander inside, Bobby somehow carrying two casserole dishes and Athena holding one, along with a large bottle of champagne.

“Here, let me help,” he says, darting forward to relieve at least one of them of their burden, but he gets two sets of raised eyebrows for his efforts. 

“We’re guests,” Bobby says, unbothered, as he walks inside. “Let us help.”

Athena purses her lips at him, but as she follows her husband, she lightly bumps into Tommy on the way. “You’re family now, you know,” she reminds him, and her expression softens when Tommy fights down a nervous grimace. “We’re not that scary." She eyes him a little bit, smiling, and deigns to hand the enormous bottle of champagne over to Tommy. “Better get that on ice.”

Tommy nods and shuts the door behind them, but hangs back in the foyer while he watches the 118 gather together and greet each other with hugs and cheek kisses, and twists his hands around the dark glass of the champagne bottle. Evan - halfway into a conversation with his sister - suddenly breaks away and steps quickly towards Tommy. He bends down and picks up the beer that Ravi had shoved into Tommy’s hands, then leans in and kisses Tommy on the mouth, warm and soft and lingering. 

“Come on,” he whispers as he pulls away. “Everybody wants to see our house.”

Tommy will admit that he’s had his reservations ever since Evan moved in and brought up having a housewarming party, but as he steps into the living room and the family Evan’s cultivated for himself makes room to fold Tommy in, he finally understands why Evan wanted this.

He spends the next hour talking to Maddie and Karen about some godawful procedural show that they all watch as a guilty pleasure, and he’s in the middle of listening to Karen and Maddie debate about who Dr. Townsend should end up with - his RN Kathryn or Dr. Alcott - and trying to formulate a way to bring up how he thinks Townsend should end up with Dr. Kingston, the very male cardiologist, when a familiar pair of arms wind their way around Tommy’s waist.

“I can’t believe you guys watch that show,” Evan says as he hooks his chin over Tommy’s shoulder and scrunches his nose. The arms around him squeeze lightly before Evan says, “But he should end up with the heart surgeon guy.”

Maddie and Karen both make faces like it had never crossed their mind but it actually makes sense to them, and Tommy leans his head back so that his lips brush over Evan’s ear when he says, “God, I love you.”

Evan buries a smile into the meat of Tommy’s shoulder and starts to slightly sway them together, listening as Maddie and Karen excitedly discuss the possibilities of Dr. Townsend and Dr. Kingston.

“Don’t think I forgot what you said earlier,” Evan whispers, just loud enough for Tommy to hear, “when you were eating the seven layer dip.”

Tommy covers Evan’s hands with his own. “Wasn’t expecting you to,” he murmurs, and begins rubbing circles on the back of Evan’s hands. 

“You know we’re gonna have to talk about that later, right?”

Tommy hums, and just keeps swaying, “Later,” he whispers. “Right now, we’ve got family over, don’t we?”

Evan draws a breath, and the arms around Tommy tighten.

not sorry. this deserves it's own big gifset