Thinking About A Duct Tape Wizard

𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐒 𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆... | sae itoshi, shidou ryusei, kaiser micheal

part two with reo, rin and bachira soon!!

plot: you're in a nonpublic relationship, but one gesture in particular blows your cover <3

𝐌𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ; take a look, trust me!

— sae itoshi

That you had always been attracted to impossible things was not unknown: as a child you loved unicorns, one of the most imaginative and magical creatures ever. You believed you could love even something impossible, and the same thing had more or less happened when you met your boyfriend, Sae Itoshi. Sae was something impossible, out of your reach for the simple fact that you were a very normal person when he was one of the most famous U-20 soccer players in the world and, above all, of the moment

Sae was impossible, and you had always liked the impossible. That's how you liked to tell your mother when she asked how you ended up in a relationship with him. Known for a big misunderstanding in a public laundry, for a reason still unknown to you, fate had decided that this was not the last time you would see each other

The choice had come when Sae had explicitly asked you for it: not that he was ashamed of you or anything like that, but fame brings negative things as well as positive ones. One of them was privacy. Although after years he was used to invasions of privacy even during a walk, he didn't want to ruin what had always been normality for you. So no one, other than your families and a few friends of yours, knew about you two

And so, a little over a year after you had made it official only to your families that you were together as a couple, the thing that was impossible for you was how your cover was still standing. You didn't mind being in a nonpublic relationship, in fact you found it more pleasant and intimate, but Sae was famous all over the world: you knew that sooner or later everything would collapse like a house of playing cards

And evidently that day was today

"So, who is she?" his teammate asks again, the Spanish accent thick in every word. Your fingers tighten around the handles of his sports bag, desperately searching for a way that doesn't confirm what practically everyone in the room has already assumed. 10 pairs of eyes stare at you curiously, waiting for either you or Sae to speak and make up an excuse that they can deny

The last match that ReAl had won against an equally Spanish team had ended less than an hour ago. It was Valentine's Day, and the stadium where the match was played had made VIP seats available to which only the players partners could access. The partners had a card previously given by the boyfriends which gave the possibility of walking in certain areas of the stadium, one of which was the locker room. You had remained in the popular stands for the entire match, and after the end you had decided to use your VIP pass, which Sae had given you a few days before, to go and congratulate and surprise him. You had purposely waited a full hour to get in just so all the other teammates would leave, but apparently something had been holding them back

The players didn't know you, it was a secret relationship after all. The partners who usually came to see their boyfriends knew each other, and Sae was still the only one no one had ever seen with a girl. Everything fit with the perfect fall of the cover that you had so carefully supported

"umh" you stutter embarrassed. The most damning proof you have is undoubtedly the Sae sports bag you have in your hands, which stands out for its black color instead of the white and red that ReAl uses. You take a few steps back, not knowing at all how to escape the situation, much less where Sae is, who you don't even see in the locker room. His stuff is here, his teammates are here, but where is he dammit?

"We've never eaten anyone, or at least off the field" says a boy who gets up, making the rest of his teammates laugh. You recognize him for being a braggart that Sae tells you about every now and then, who has 100 girls and every game brings a new one. You roll your eyes at the tasteless joke, trying not to let your annoyance show

"I probably went to the wrong locker room, please excuse me..." you say turning on your heel, heading towards the exit, but the boy's hand grabs your wrist just enough to make you immobilize "It's not a problem, you don't have to apologize. But I don't think you're here by mistake..." the boy says laughing cheerfully, and really, you don't understand all his humor. You try to free yourself from the grip on the wrist, but the soccer player doesn't seem to give in as he makes some of his teammates laugh with sleazy jokes

“Could you let go of my wrist?” you say trying to sound polite, but he shakes his head "We need to figure out who your boyfriend is first! Victor, is she your girlfriend?" the boy asks, making you turn towards another guy, who obviously shakes his head "Sanchez, is this yours?" he asks another again, and you can't explain why you have to suffer such humiliating treatment if you haven't actually done anything wrong

"Arion, is it your-" the boy says, but someone interrupts him "She's my girlfriend."

Everyone turns towards the voice, including you: Sae, fresh out of the shower wearing sweatpants and a simple towel around his neck, peeks out from the locker room showers. His eyes waver a little at seeing you here, surprised at the whole situation and above all not understanding how you ended up here. He tilts his head, his usual apathetic look at the boy next to you "You should let go her wrist" he says taking a few steps forward, the usual nonchalance typical of his character. "Oh! Oh, yes" says the boy, immediately pulling away, taking a few steps back. The grip on your wrist releases, easing the pressure you had built up. You breathe a sigh of relief, but at the same time remember what situation you are in: the relationship that you had covered for so long has just come to light

You look up at Sae, who you think is the least bit angry, but there isn't a shred of anger in his face, in fact, he almost seems relieved. He comes in front of you, taking his sports bag that you had in your hands "Thanks. Two minutes and we can go" he says putting it back on the floor, putting a clean t-shirt on and putting the towel back on in his black bag. You look at him embarrassed, not daring to look at any of his teammates who have remained silent in the meantime

Sae stands up, holding his bag with one hand and grabbing yours with the other, letting your palms and fingers connect "Let's go" he says, nodding his head. You leave the locker room, everyone's gaze still on you. Start walking towards the back of the stadium, heading towards the car parks dedicated to the players cars. A slight, uncomfortable silence hangs between you two, and you wonder if he's simply thinking of a way to restore everything to how it was and make your relationship nonpublic again

"It wasn't that bad anyway. You can ask your teammates to just shut up" you say, looking down, but a light squeeze on your hand makes you look up in his direction “Huh?” he asks, and you try to sound clearer "For the relationship. You can tell your classmates not to talk-" you say, but he cuts you off even before you finish "Do you want to make it nonpublic again?" he asks, and you find yourself thinking about it

Being nonpublic had never been a problem for you, you appreciated that Sae cared so much about your privacy. On the other hand, your privacy never really mattered much to you: you wanted to walk with him and hold his hand even in front of a crowd, not pretend not to know him as often happened. If being with him meant sacrificing something, you would have done so immediately and without even thinking about

“I'm actually okay with being public-” you say and at the same moment you see him sigh more calmly “What is it?” you ask curiously "I've been waiting a long time to ask you this. But I didn't want to seem hypocritical since I asked you to make it nonpublic" Sae says, and almost immediately you smile at his words

The impossible was something that actually often actually happened. It had happened that you got dating to the prodigy of Japan, and it was happening now when you were officially made his girlfriend for all his fans and the world

— shidou ryusei

“You went too far as usual” you say, rolling your eyes, albeit amused. Shidou chuckles, buttoning up the buttons that hide your chest “You should be used to it” he says looking up after finishing his work. You laugh softly, still amazed at how you let yourself be dragged into such a situation. But then you think about it and you understand that avoiding these situations with your boyfriend is far too difficult. Shidou cups your face in his hands, tilting your head slightly to look at his beautiful work: two red and purple marks stand out from many other small ones. He observes them with a certain pride, stroking the bite mark he left on you with his thumb

“I don't think this was the break the director intended” you say, walking towards the door, reluctantly releasing the grip Shidou had. You hear him murmuring something, but you don't pay attention to it as you brush your hair to the side, leaving the hickeys on your neck visible: you have to walk in an empty corridor and you're hot, so you're not at risk. You place your hand on the doorknob, headed to exit and return to the car, but you are petrified when the entire corridor turns out to be filled with journalists

You stand there, motionless, and Shidou appears behind you, also intending to leave. He stands still, but less shocked, a few steps behind you. Everyone turns in your direction, and an awkward silence hangs in the narrow space delimited by the walls. Many, if not all, notice the red marks on your neck and there are more than a few surprised expressions. Some cameras turn towards you, some journalists take their microphones in case the situation requires them

And you immediately regret having, for the umpteenth time, indulged Shidou's shitty ideas. You knew you had to wait for him in the car so that he could go home with you at the end of the interview, but his messages had convinced you that there was no harm in sneaking out for a few minutes. While you were waiting he had sent you messages telling you that his interview was late and that the director had advised him to go to a private room to relax before his shift. He had asked you to come in to keep him company, that you could sneak in for a few minutes since the corridors were empty, and that he simply needed you. And so you found yourself against the wall with your boyfriend's lips on your neck, killing time until his interview

But evidently something had gone wrong with the program in mind, because now you had more than 100 journalists waiting their turn and now they had a front page story. You and him had been together for a while, and the agreement between you was to keep your relationship nonpublic for a while because the media often went heavy on their idols partners

But the cover seemed to have been blown

"Shidou, Shidou Ryusei? With a mysterious girl?" says a journalist, directing the microphone at you "The king of the penalty area with a woman?" someone else says, and from then on you just hear everyone else making up name after name as they try to get some information out of you two

"Holy shit" you whisper to yourself, covering your hickeys with your hair, even though everyone has noticed them by now. You die of embarrassment at all these eyes staring at you, and the best option at the moment seems to be going back into the room and hoping that this is all just a trick your mind is playing on you. You knew that sooner or later you would make it official, but you didn't think this way and especially with you in these conditions. It all looked perfectly like the most colossal figure of shit the human lifeform had ever seen in this shitty life

You look for Shidou, but when you turn you can't find him anymore. You wonder if he seriously followed the advice to go back to the room and hope it's all a dream, but you know that's not your man's style: instead you feel your shoulders surrounded by his arm, which promptly squeezes you to the point of keeping you by your side alongside. You turn towards him, and on his face you notice that his usual smirk that never leads to anything good. Something's about to explode

"Ladies, gentlemen! One at a time, please" he says loudly, and the attention they previously had on you shifts to him, who has always dominated the scene better in a frighteningly natural way "This racket for WHAT? Two red marks? You've never seen worse, then" he says, and as you thought his joke provokes a small laugh from everyone

The journalists try to get the best place in front of you, and perplexed you turn to Shidou "Don't do anything I might regret" you say almost in a whisper, but he grins "Let me do it, babe. I tied them to my finger like fish to a fishing line" he says confidently, and it's his confidence that worries you. Some journalist raises the microphone, firing off questions that you don't even understand because of the speed. Shidou still doesn't understand them, and after several attempts he gives up; he waves his hand, moving the microphones away

"I thought I would talk today about my relationship with the beautiful girl in question here, but evidently the scoop will go to you and not to the agency we are in" he says dramatically, as if he actually regretted giving information to others. "What did you want to do?" you whisper perplexed, not knowing that his goal today was to make it official anyway. Shidou turns to you, grabs your waist and bends your back, his chest smeared against his “Media, meet my fucking beloved girlfriend!” he says, kissing you. Confused, you don't know how to react, but shortly after you give in and respond to the kiss, placing your hand against his face. The journalists explode, the cameras start filming and broadcasting. It's an understatement that you have shocked the media for at least the next few days, but with Shidou in the end everything is unpredictable and without explosions

It wasn't the way you expected to make it official, but as long as it works it's fine, right?

— micheal kaiser

The subtle smell of french fries hung in the air, mixing with the light air that resonated in the club. Everyone's chatting made the evening pleasant, which actually seemed to go too well

Hamburg was huge as a city, Ness himself recognized it, yet he had lived there for a good part of his life before moving to Berlin on the campus of Bastard Munchen. You had been here a few other times, and you had fallen in love with the small and cute clubs that the city offered

When you returned to the hotel room with Kaiser you had begged him to go out tonight, since you had arrived you had spent all your time at training or at the match, which had ended with the victory of the German team. And Kaiser has little chance of telling you no, it's something he just can't do: so, a few hours later, you and other team members found yourself in a club celebrating the victory. Sitting next to him you were calm, after all he was your boyfriend and his team knew about you two, unlike the rest of the world. However, being in a public place the only affectionate gesture you could allow yourself was his hand on your thigh, covered by the table and which no stranger could see

Everything was going well: Bastard Munchen had won today, tomorrow morning you would return home and take a few days break from being the team manager. Everything was perfect

But obviously perfection, even if sweated with difficulty and attention, does not last long

You were chatting with a team member when, from afar, you noticed a group of guys watching you. It was nothing new, the players were famous and you were also quite well known thanks to your role in the team. Kaiser notices the same thing, tilting his face towards the small crowd "You're wanted" you say jokingly, and he snorts in a mock annoyed way: you know how much he actually loves this attention from fans, which feeds his big ego. The guys step forward, followed by others and yet others, until the table is surrounded by all the guys shyly asking for an autograph or a photo

The group, made up of a girl and two boys, approaches Kaiser asking to take a photo. He accepts, reluctantly lifting the contact of his hand on your thigh, and you can read his slight annoyance in his cerulean eyes. You giggle a little at seeing him annoyed, but you don't let it show

Then, the dinner that was supposed to be quiet and a way to spend time with your boyfriend turns out to be yet another time when public life comes before private life; it doesn't make you sad though, because seeing Kaiser happy while talking to his fans makes you happy too

You stay to eat your chips and chat with Ness, who unlike Kaiser only had to sign a few quick autographs, and every now and then you glance at Kaiser who stayed behind to talk to the group of people. You notice how completely comfortable he seems, so you don't worry

But then something reaches your ear

"We are moving to another club to spend the rest of the night, would you join us?" a boy says, and the rest of the group nods. Kaiser is used to these somewhat sudden questions, fans often cross the line almost without wanting to "I can't guys. The team is celebrating together tonight" he says playing with a lock of his blue hair, and you try to be indiscreet in listening to the conversation

"What a shame..." says a boy, and Kaiser chuckles "I know guys. Maybe next time" he says, and he seems about to go back to the table, when the girl stops him by taking a few steps forward "Or maybe there's is it a girl you're waiting for?" the woman asks, and you immediately turn towards their direction, trying not to cough up what's in your mouth for the surprise

You see Kaiser a little perplexed, you notice it from the way he tilts his head trying to come up with an excuse that seems convincing "Maybe. But I shouldn't tell you, guys" he says, and this time you're the one who's perplexed

You see him turn towards you, just enough to give you a brief wink that you notice all too well. You pretend like you didn't see him, turning away, but you really don't understand where he's going with his speech. You've been together for quite a while and it's always been confidential for a matter of convenience, being nonpublic you had many pros but at the same time many cons. And at the time you had never talked about making it public, as much as you actually wanted to be like this

"Really? Are you in a relationship?" the boy asks, and Kaiser smiles satisfied "I don't know. Do you think I have it?" he asks, and everyone immediately nods "There are rumors that you are dating the German model who is always on the front page of Vogue" says one, but the other corrects him "What are you saying! He could be dating the girl he was spotted with last week passed in front of the city's cathedral" says the other, and you see in Kaiser's gaze an amusement you've never seen before. You nervously bite your nail, not knowing what he's doing and above all why he didn't complete the conversion a few minutes ago. What the fuck is going on?

"You're both wrong! The rumors all agree that he's dating the manager of Bastard Munchen, have you seen how they look at each other? Or how she's always the first one he greets when the players take the field?" says the girl very convinced, placing her hands on her waist

It is at that moment when all your beliefs fall away. You thought you hadn't made the situation so obvious, but evidently you failed

You turn towards them again, trying to hide the blush that you now know has taken up residence on your cheeks. Kaiser claps his hands happily "Right! I'm waiting for her" he says, and everyone in the group's jaw drops "Are you serious? Are you seriously with the manager?" the boy asks, and he nods. You notice too late how the girl, peeking out from Kaiser's figure, has noticed you: you hide your face by looking down, but it's too late now

"But she's here!" the girl says, and Kaiser rolls his eyes as if he hadn't noticed you “I know. My girlfriend, yu-hu Y/n!” he says, raising his hand to greet you as if he hadn't just dropped a bombshell on a mere group of fans. You raise your face trying to look as calm as possible, as if everything is actually normal and your heart isn't going 100 times faster than normal. Kaiser comes closer, sitting next to you again and putting his arm around your shoulders, while the group looks at you surprised but happy "I don't like to keep my girlfriend waiting, guys. Have a good evening though!" he says, cuddling while you are literally trying not to start screaming

The guys nod, both saying goodbye and thanking Kaiser for his time. When they leave, you turn to him with the reddest face ever "What did you just do?!" you ask in surprise, but with his free hand he caresses your arm, making slow and gentle movements "Doing what I should have done a long time ago. Isn't it better this way, Schatz?" he asks. You suppress the urge to insult him, because the truth is, you too would have liked to make it official a long time ago

“Do you know that now you will have to confirm this to the whole world and not just to one group?” you ask with a sigh, relaxing the nerves that have been on edge for minutes. He smirks, nodding as he grabs his phone “I've had a post ready on Instagram for a while. It's been in the drafts for a long time, how about I post it now?” he asks, and you curse yourself for never being able to be mad at him

You both had each other's fingers tied, it was too obvious by now. Maybe it really was time to share your love with the world and not just with the team, as it has been until now

imagine if ayaka once tried to set her brother and vigil!mc up by bringing uo the offer of a wedding between the two during a meeting she called.

maybe you and ayato were.. in your teens nearing adulthood? idk.

little kazuha listening in to the conversation and once he heard “marriage” and your and ayato’s names, he burst in and starts bawling as he hugs the mc. glaring at the young kamisato head. and imagine if he stuck out his tongue and blew raspberries at them as he and you left the room.

-🦧 kazuha never forgot. though his grudge on the kamisatos has lessened

THIS IS ADORABLE ψ(｀∇´)ψ My serotonin for the day! o(≧口≦)o

Prepare for a lot of kaomojis utc ahaha-

Little Kazuha has always been protective of MC what with her suitors (as seen in that one short where he does everything in his power to stop the conversation between MC and a boy lmao).

Now, their age gap isn't that large, actually. I'd say around three.

So... maybe MC/Ayato's around 11? 12? Young enough to humor and play along with their younger siblings lol, who are around 8-9.

I can just see Ayaka having this phase in which she read tons of romance novels and gives matchmaking a try lmao. What better 'victim' than her dear brother?

Tomo is aware of everything Ayaka is doing lol and is probably the one to tell Kazuha about it when they were sword fighting.

The panic and hORROR (＃°Д°) on Kazuha's face as he goes,

Nee-san? Σ(゜ロ゜;) MARRIAGE!? (*ﾟﾛﾟ) !!

NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (ｼ;ﾟДﾟ)ｼ

He'll rush to the Kamisato Estate and demand to see where they are, with that sword of his in hand ahdjsdhahdada

Now, envision him running into a scene where Ayato and MC are exchanging flower rings (they're just going along with Ayaka's musings) and you can just see him- ‘`( ꒪Д꒪),､

youcanhearhisheartbreak

He'll go chOOOOOTTTO MATTAAAA ヾ(ﾟДﾟ;ヾ) Is this a real marriage he's seeing!? ヽ(#ﾟДﾟ)ﾉ

NEE-SAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING !!(ﾉ*ﾟДﾟ)ﾉ

（┛〃°　Д°）┛ YOU CAN'T GET MARRIED YET

ALSO WHO'S THAT GIRL MARRYING HIS NEE-SAN OFF TO SOME GUY? (｢⊙Д⊙)｢

THE KAMISATO YOU SAY? ฺ(☼Д☼) Oh no, a part of the tri-commission... (￣ ‘i ￣;)

THAT AIN'T STOPPING HIM

He'll make an excuse to pull MC OUT of there, going:

Nee-san quick ⊃゜Д゜）⊃

Then just being (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧ because he's successful lmao.

I forgot to mention...

I imagine if Diluc get super clingy...

He might asked us to tie his hair 👀 he'll sit on the floor like a little kid and like stay there until we're finished 🥺

Or

If he's tired...(and we're staying (a.k.a living) with him)

He'll be longing for our touch and when he's home, he'll be going into our shared room in a rush (but quietly 🤫) just to get spooned by us and inhaling our homey scent

Like...changing his clothes into a pj (I think he'll wear dark colours, satin pj) and wiggling himself into our arms 🥺🥺

*I cannot contain myself 🥺 my brain cannot stop imagining these things after reading your ficts*

-🍮-

Thank you for the food pudding anon nom nom ahahhaa

Hahaha he is such a soft person around you I don’t doubt that he might do that if he’s 100000% comfortable with you. 

He has such beautiful hair too <3 

Art Disclaimer: Please do not take the photo and repost. Feel free to reblog though. Commissioned jfairuz for this one. It’s so, so pretty. 

The Ruthless Prince Masterlist - Genshin Royal AU - Scaramouche x fem!reader

Summary: When Prince Scaramouche picks you out of a random group of commoners to marry, your life is turned upside down. He’s mean, snarky, condescending and he doesn’t act like a proper husband or prince at all. However, when Prince Tartaglia from the neighbouring kingdom takes an interest in you, Prince Scaramouche finds himself even more annoyed than usual. This is the story of him and you navigating this roller coaster of a relationship.

Chapter 1 - You’re Marrying Me, That’s Final!

Chapter 2 - Social Pretense

Chapter 3 - Can I Understand Him?

Chapter 4 - Pet Wife

Chapter 5 - Enter Prince Tartaglia

Chapter 6 - Just the Beginning

Chapter 7 - To My Heart

Chapter 8 - Where is This Anger Coming From?

Chapter 9 - check back later

This is actually the context for this pic guys trust me my uncle works at mihoyo

are you afraid of me?

what the hell type of name is "mr. crawling" if he can fucking walk?

‧₊ ᵎᵎ 🍒 ⋅ ˚✮ based on the hc that mr crawling doesn't stand so he doesn't scare mc.

warnings. just fluff/comfort, some spoilers for end04 and end17

Mr. Crawling is kind.

Mr. Crawling is sweet.

Mr. Crawling is a complete mystery to you.

Other than his complete and instant devotion to you, you know almost nothing about him. Not that you’re complaining; since escaping the other world with him in tow, he’s been a pretty decent roommate.

He doesn’t have many hobbies, unless staring at you from across the room counts. The only mess he leaves is long, black hairs that snake along the shower walls and more often than not clog the drain. He doesn’t even eat your food—something you discovered after a week of trial and error, setting out everything from leftovers to raw steak in the hopes of figuring out what a creature like him might like. As it turns out, he isn’t much of an eater, and he refuses to wear anything but the clothes he crossed over in, so at least you didn’t need to buy him new clothes. He’s low-maintenance in those areas, thankfully, and your paycheck doesn’t take a huge hit. 

Still, as close as you are, and as much as you’ve grown fond of him, you know nothing about who or what he truly is. Can he stand? Does he even have eyeballs? You know he can see, somehow, but how? Does he have teeth? You’re not even sure there’s a word for teeth in his language… Would he need a dentist? As most of your Mr. Crawling mouth knowledge went, you knew he had a tongue. 

The days pass, you fall into routines, and so do your questions.

“Crawling,” you had said one night, settled up on the sofa after a long day at work.  “Why can’t you stand?”

Mr. Crawling looks up from the screen, his wide smile faltering as he absorbs your question. His hair falls across his face, hiding whatever might be behind those red blotches he has for eyes.

“Me… not able to stand,” he replies, waving abnormally long limbs. “Arms good!” He seems proud, at least. 

You purse your lips out in thought- sure, he had those spindly legs, but it wasn’t like he couldn’t use them. You witnessed first hand the way he kicks his legs about under the blanket, unsettling cracks of his joints. Or when he sits up on his knees to fetch something on the counter top that he couldn’t reach from the floor. 

“You want me stand?”

“No, Crawling, I like you like this.” And you finished the conversation with a few pats on his head, and he nuzzled into your knee as if he was a pet. 

“You like me?”

You nod.

“Me like you!”

Low maintenance in the roommate department, high maintenance in the boyfriend? department.

You settle into bed that night after serving Mr Crawling his completely normal human soup that you definitely obtained by very legal and moral ways. Although, he didn’t seem very hungry that night, and you decided to just keep it for later. You debated on leaving it out in case he got hungry during the night when you were asleep, but seeing as to what the contents were, you weren’t up for it to stink out your kitchen. Back in the fridge it went!

“Rest?” he asks from the doorway of your bedroom, eyeless staring as you settle on the mattress. 

“I rest. You rest?” You pat the spot beside you. 

“Me watch you.”

Whatta guy… You wait for him to join you before you pull the blanket to your chin. And just like every other night, Mr. Crawling wraps his long arms around you, joints cracking as he stretches his legs out on the blanket- his feet hang off the bed. His hair tickles every exposed inch of your skin, but you don’t mind. You’ve gotten used to it at this point- maybe you should teach him to brush his own hair though?

His touch is cool, like air from a drafty window, and you relax under his delicate, careful pats on your head. It’s not long before you drift off.

It’s rare that you wake up in the dead of night. It’s rarer when you wake up to him not in the same position you fell asleep in. Groggy, you reach an arm out to the other side of the bed and hit the space where Mr. Crawling should have been. It’s still warm, however, and you sit up and rub your eyes. He’s not here.

What the hell? That wasn’t like him.

You slip into your slippers and shuffle toward the kitchen. The house is dark and still, except for a faint rustling. When your vision adjusts, you stop in your tracks. You were pretty sure your heart stopped for a second, too. 

He hadn’t noticed you yet, which is unlike him. 

“C-Crawling?” you stammer. 

Mr. Crawling is there, long arms in your fridge, but he isn’t small and folded like usual. He’s… standing. You blink, barely processing the sight. He has to be at least eight feet tall, maybe more, his head brushing the ceiling. His towering shadow spills over the walls, unsettling even to someone like you.

He freezes, letting out a startled squeak you’ve never heard before. His head whips toward you, and his hair falls in a curtain over his face. He drops to his knees instantly, scrambling across the floor to you with long, frantic arms. He tackles you into an overzealous hug, the kind you usually get only when you come home from work.

“You awake!”

You blink down at him. “I thought you said you couldn’t stand?” you murmur, still dazed. He lied? Why would he lie? Is there even a word for lie in his language?

His hair fans at your face, elbows propping himself up on top of you. Mr. Crawling tilts his head at you, and you wrack your brain in this stupid monster language that you just can’t perfectly adjust to yet.

“Uhm… You stand good?” you manage to fumble the words out. You stand good. That just sounds ridiculous. “Legs work?”

Mr. Crawling lets you sit up, grey hands cupping your face. He seems… off. Sad? Worried? You’ve only seen him not smiling a few times- and that was when you first met him- when he scared the absolute daylights off of you, when that man in red with the umbrella appeared… There was also that time you collapsed, and that creepy, eyeless nurse showed up.

“You scared me?” he asks, his tone soft.

Are you scared of me? 

“You don’t stand because you think you’ll scare me?” you mumble, hands holding onto his wrists. “Erm… Not stand… me scared?” 

“Me scary… You not like me.” His head hangs and Mr. Crawling’s hair touches the floor and licks at your legs.. His gentle hold of your face loosens.

He doesn’t stand at his full height because he’s afraid he’ll scare you? God. How can a ghost be such a sweetheart?

“Hey,” you whisper, pulling his hands off your face. You wrap your arms around his neck, tilting your head so you can see where his eyes should be. “You’re cute. Very big, yes—I was just surprised.”

“You… not scared?” His voice is uncertain.

You giggle, squeezing him tighter. “No. Just surprised.” He doesn’t understand you- and you need to wrack every shelf in your brain to get the words out. “Me surprised… you very cute.”

There’s a beat of silence as he absorbs your words. “Me cute?” he repeats, as if it’s the greatest revelation in the world.

“Very cute,” you confirm, unable to help laughing as he tackles you once again to the floor, hair scattering everywhere as he nuzzles into your chest, murmuring, “Me cute, me cute,” in a gleeful mantra. You pat his head, and he flops onto the floor beside you with a giggle.

You stare at him, illuminated by the extremely romantic light of the fridge. “Hungry?” you ask, and push some of his hair away from his face- he grabs your wrist before you get any closer to his eyes, though.

“Want eat… you rest.”

You shake your head, stifling a yawn. “I’ll wait for you. I… erm… rest with you?” You cringe, knowing you said it wrong. You’re at least seventy percent sure you said it wrong. Maybe it’s time to teach him your language.

Mr. Crawling lets out his normal unsettling giggles, a sound that cuts through the silence of the house.

You don’t bother getting his tomato soup out of the fridge like you usually do, and take a seat at the table. He looks lost for a split second, and giggles once more as he rises to his feet. You let out a few appreciative oohs and ahhs he reaches his full height. You’re still a bit shocked at how his head almost touches the ceiling.

He settles into his usual seat across from you, knees folded as best as they can be under the table, his feet brushing against your legs.

It’s like a lightbulb appears above your head.

What the hell type of name is “Mr. Crawling” if he can fucking walk? 

I have finally gathered the balls to send a request-

This my first time doing this and I'm so sorry if I'm awkward and doing this wrong help

AhEmmmMmMm anyways may I request the "Are you jealous? <(￣︶￣)>" Fluff with Diluc and/or xiao!! (If you don’t mind and if you’re not busy ofc)

Tysmm!! Have a wonderful day 💗💗

Slimed

Diluc x AFAB!GN!Reader / Xiao x GN!Reader

Summary: You start collecting little nice slimes from your adventures, you can't help it, they're just too cute to be left behind in the wild all alone and sad. Anyway, your boyfriend starts to become jealous when you take care of your little army of slimes instead of him :(

Prompt: "Are you jealous? <(￣︶￣)>"

(I'll give this a little warning and say that in this, Diluc is a simp for reader's mommy milkers, that's why it's AFAB reader. So just a smidge of horny juice ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

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Diluc

The first night, Diluc found it so cute coming home to you sleeping on your shared bed, two slimes enjoying the warmth of your body, a hydro slime resting on your tummy, and a pyro slime nuzzling your cheek.

He did bring up the fact that the pyro one can burn you, but...

"Oh, Diluc. Burny here would never do that." You raised the little pyro slime up to his face, the blob looking at him all confused. "He's my little baby~" Then, you brought the little slime to your chest, your lover visibly perplexed that the slime's expression immediately turned happy from confusion.

The second night, there was three more slimes, which the red-haired man assumed to be triplets, since they were all geo slimes sleeping stacked up together just above your head.

And things happen, so now, there was a freaking mommy anemo slime sheltering her two babies with her wings. Andddd... They're sleeping on his side of the bed.

That same night though, you weren't asleep, you were singing a quiet song to your pets, watching as they all swayed side to side in perfect sync.

You hear a cough from behind you.

Following the sound, you see Diluc!

Awww, you were just thinking that Diluc would absolutely love seeing that you just thought the Slimies, that's what you started calling them, how to dance.

"'Luc, you're home! I wanted to show you something important!" You jumped off the bed, almost tripping at the process, before jumping into the arms of your lover.

Does Diluc want to be mad at you for letting slimes invade the bed? Yes.

Is he mad at you for letting slimes invade the bed? Hell no.

He loves you a little too much to be mad at you for having such a big, soft heart.

I mean, you took home an anemo slime and her children because when you looked at their eyes for the first time, you knew they needed help, and you would die of guilt if you just left them their in the wild.

Diluc especially isn't gonna be mad at you after you just pulled him a chair, presented the "Slimies" on the bed in front of him, sung in your beautiful voice whilst the slimes dance to the soft melodies.

"What do you think? Isn't it great?" You asked ever so enthusiastically, even clapping for your little slimes.

"Of course it was, darling. You don't sing very often, but when you do..." Diluc had stood up from his chair, walking closer to you before sitting next to you on the bed. He had gently took your hand in his. "It's the best." With that, he kissed the back of your hand.

The red haired man did love seeing the slight tint of pink on your cheeks.

"But, uhhh.... Where are we gonna sleep?"

So that was the fifth night, the slimes took one side of the bed.

Diluc laid on his back on the other, you on your stomach on top of him, hugging his form as you slept peacefully. It was a pretty cold night, he would be lying that he didn't love the feeling of your body against his.

"No naughty touchies, Diluc! The babies might wake up and see us!"

On the seventh day, you asked the Winery's staffs' help in creating a small bed that's big enough for the mommy anemo slime and her babies to sleep in beside your own bed.

Now you have both sides of the bed back to normal... sort of.

Diluc knows that look, that look on the pyro slime's small face as it was squished between your breasts.

The look of utter superiority.

Great, he can't touch you in that spot, because "the slimes will see" but it's okay for that little bugger to just squeeze his way between those pretty mounds?

That's unfair.

"Diluc! Burny would never do such a thing! He's the sweetest little angel in the world." You had scolded him when he told you about that.

You had taken your three little geos for a walk in the city and manage to find yourself in Angel's Share to visit your favorite person in the whole wide world.

Surprisingly, it was pretty empty, just a few people upstairs drinking with their buddies.

Diluc's eyes landed on the three blobs that you held to you upper body, his lips tightening at the sight of the geos nuzzling your soft chest.

Great, not them too.

Your tiny gasp brings his attention back to your face. "Diluc..."

You smiled teasingly at him.

"Are you jealous?" His face and ears instantly heat up, your expression was just like: <(￣︶￣)>

"N-No... It's not like I'm mad that they get to be so close to you and I can't----" The red haired man cursed himself, not realizing what he just said. It made you giggle.

You gently placed the geo triplets on the bar counter, going around so that you could enter behind the counter where he is.

"Come here, you big teddy bear." You wrapped your arms around him, his figure stammering down a little so his head rested on your chest.

"How does that feel?" Despite Diluc's distaste for affection in public, he admits that he probably wouldn't pull away even if a costumer walks through the door.

"Good..." His voice was muffled from being buried on your covered skin.

You both hear the front door of Angel's Share open.

"Uhh... Is this a bad time?" Both your face were red as Diluc's hair as the Cavalry Captain's voice comes from the doorway.

Xiao

"Xiao..."

From the balcony of Wangshu Inn, he heard your whisper being carried by the wind.

Though you didn't seem distressed, Xiao felt worry run through him as he uses his power to look for you.

The situation is... a little less worrying than he thought.

"Can you help me get these little guys back to the Inn?" You had gestured downwards, directing his eyes to the big geo slime hiding behind your legs, with three other smaller slimes hiding behind the big slime.

The Yaksha had looked at you all confused. "Why?"

You frowned at him, putting your hands on your hips sternly. "Look at their eyes, Xiao. This geo slime family needs our help!"

From closer inspections, he definitely saw a few rough spikes and gashes on the mother slime, its facial expressions sad and begging, looking at you all hopeful.

Xiao looked back at your face...

Oh no, you had that puppy dog eyes again. You know he can't resist that.

And now you're both here, your delicate hands working on "healing" the mother slime's scars.

You did read somewhere that in the wild, geo slimes uses soil to patch up their wounds, rolling in a big pile of dirt to cover up scars.

"She must've been unable to do that because she just gave birth to these adowable triplets." You pat the heads of the three geo babies snuggly wrapped with your blanket.

You and the big geo slime are on the floor. "Don't worry, ma'am. We'll heal those wounds in no time." You bring out the bucket of dirt that Xiao managed to give you.

"Shouldn't you do this outside, where it's not gonna be a pain to clean up?" The Yaksha peeps in, receiving a pout from you.

"No, Love. It's too cold outside, their momma could get sick." You're not even sure if that can happen, but better safe than sorry. The guilt will rip you in half if you manage to make the poor slime feel worse.

As you take a handful of dirt in your hand, smearing it in the places where there are wounds and scars, Xiao's eyes follow your movements.

It's so similar, kind of like when you treat his own wounds when he gets into one of those tough fights with demons.

You even comfort the slime the same way, with a soft whisper that everything is going to be alright, that you're trying to make it feel better.

There was a feeling in his chest, a feeling that made him feel so pathetic. Why is he suddenly so envious of that slime?

Maybe it was because, your hands was on something else living that wasn't him? But it's a freaking slime, an injured, mother of three slime at that.

"See, we didn't make that much of a mess." Xiao's attention went back on you as your proud voice rings in his ears.

"And their momma looks so much better!" You scooped the little bit of dirt that fell off onto your hands and back in the bucket.

You smiled seeing the little content expression on the big geo slime. You realized, you can't just keep calling her the "momma geo slime".

"You need a name, huh? How about... Mocha?" You looked back at Xiao and giggled, a sound so beautiful in his ears. "What do you think, Xiao?"

"If that's what you want." He walked closer before sitting beside you. "Mocha, it is."

You said you were gonna let Mocha and the triplets live in the wild again after she and her babies are fully healed.

They've been in the Inn for a month now, sometimes you'd take them on your adventures with the intention of finally letting them go... but you just can't!

You always came back with them in your arms. They've become irreplaceable parts of your heart!

As Xiao was about to ambush a camp of corrupted monsters that's getting close to Wangshu Inn...

"CHARGE!" The tip of your sword was pointed at the direction of the monster camp, Mocha, Champ, Cookie and Sugar bouncing their way to the monsters.

With a sharp inhale, Mocha spat out a gigantic rock at the enemies, instantly crushing two of the monsters.

You ran up to the camp as well, taking on three of them at once, your sharp blade doing quick work of the monsters.

Meanwhile, the triplets had smacked the last three monsters so hard that they think they probably flew into another dimension.

"Hahahah, good job, team!" You exclaimed as you knelt down to the slimes' level, rubbing all of their heads just like they like it.

Xiao felt his eyes narrow, you used to compliment him and give him a little kiss when he would come back to the Inn after fighting off some threatening enemies.

Impulsively, he teleported in front of you, the geo slimes excited to see "that guy that Y/N really loves" again.

"I just wiped out the other camps of monsters..." In the middle of his sentence, he just realized what he's saying. Actually trying to impress you rather than just reassuring words.

You smiled at him, standing back up. "That's great! Verr and Huai'an are gonna be sleeping peaceful tonight!"

Xiao looked at you expectantly, waiting for you to do something... very important to him.

"Uhhh, Xiao?" You just realized that he was staring at you, making you a bit confused.

With a sigh, the Yaksha steps closer to you, the four geo slimes just looking back and forth at your interaction.

"C-Can I get a k-kiss?" His ears turn pink as he says that, your eyes widening at his question.

Oh, My Archons, when did your lover become this cute?!!!!

You giggled, even though the heat rose up to your cheeks as well, "Of course..."

Instead of the usual cheek kiss, you passionately cupped his face, pressing your lips together for a sweet kiss.

So sweet even the slimes felt shivers, and they don't even know what you're doing.

As you both part, you smiled "Are you jealous of the slimes?" You softly spoke, your forehead still against each other's.

...

You already knew the answer, "Yeah, you definitely are." You gave him one final peck before backing up, looking back down at the cute bundles of joy.

"Come on, guys, let's get back upstairs." Before walking away, you looked back at him, a teasing smile on your face.

"Maybe tonight, I'll make it up to you. Some Almond Tofu and.... a chat." His eyes were still blissed out and lips plump from the kiss.

You are a piece of work, "Yeah, a chat."

What a "chat" it was.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Oh my absolute God, I had so much fun writing this! Like genuinely, I didn't know I needed to write this, especially after writing for so many NSFW requests. Also, you're not awkward at all, you're cute uwu (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧

I hope you like this and thank you so much for requesting!!! God blessed that you got the balls to request because I love this so much! Probably one of my favorite from my own work!

it's platonicly fineee

Reblog if you think it’s okay to platonically say “I Love You” to your friends

Kazuha is a green flag for sure

---

That’s my Wife you Jerk!

Monkey D. Luffy x Reader

Summary: Luffy rescues his wife from the Big Mom pirates

Warning: based on whole cake island arch. Do not proceed if you do not want spoilers.

Now looking back, you could kick yourself silly for not taking Luffy up on his offer to join his crew when you had the chance.

In your fears of being chased and caught by the marines, you denied your a chance for adventure with the Straw Hat pirates.

It was so fun being with them that night. Why did you refuse Luffy’s offer?

Now you get to bask in your regret after having been chased and caught by the Big Mom pirates.

Standing before the pirate emperor, you wished you hadn’t gone aboard the merchants ship, when instead, you could’ve been on the thousand sunny, sipping cocktails and sunbathing on the deck grass.

A long fight later, and the merchants ship crew are long dead, and your fate remains at the mercy of Big Mom who took a keen interest in your strength.

“Ma-ma-ma-ma! You’re quite an interesting find! You must be the strongest Haki user I’ve ever seen, and by my experience, that’s definitely saying something. I think I’ll spare you.” Big Mom announces making you feel grateful at the prospects at your survival “You’ll be quite a fine addition to my family.” The feeling of relief is quickly fleeting, spiralling to defeat.

Once you’re married in, there is no escaping Big Mom.

“I’m already married.” You say, hoping to any god listening that Big Mom will spare your life and not force you to marry someone from her hoard.

“I’m well aware Monkey. Y/n.” Big Mom waives your excuse. “I think you would suit my son Katakuri just fine. Two strong Haki users are bound to heir a strong Haki protege.”

“Hell no! Listen here lady. I’m not marrying anyone! I’ve already got a husband, and that’s how it’s staying!” You challenge. Fears be damned, if you’re loosing your freedom, then it’s not a life worth living for.

“What makes you think you’ve got a choice girl?!” Big Moms voice seeps with venom. “You’d seriously rather die? What kind of idiot are you?”

“There’s no life if there is no freedom!” Your yell back, voice booming across the room with determination.

“Don’t you throw out your conquerors Haki to me you little brat! Listen here girl, that rubber idiot is on his way to my Island to take back his crew mate Sanji.” Your eyes bulge at the news. “Yes, that’s right. Vinsmoke Sanji is here marrying my daughter. Marry my son with no fuss and I won’t squash Straw hat.” You stare up unbothered at her threat. “Mark my words. If you become difficult, I’ll make sure Sanji has a hard and unhappy life.” Big Mom grins at your crumbling resolve.

You thought of Luffy and all of your past adventures together, and many more adventures ahead. That’s all you needed to reinvigorate your resolve. “Shove it hag! Sanji is a big boy, I’ll remind him where he belongs!” Big Moms vein pops from her forehead. “I’m not gonna marry your son and I’m not gonna join your stupid crew, because I already have a Captain! And my husband- he’s going to be king of the pirates!” You yell with all your might, making sure everyone felt the authenticity of your claim.

“Marriage or Death?!” Big Moms voice booms. But not a moment sooner, Luffy blasts through the wall, his hand impossibly inflated.

“That’s my wife you Jerk!” And with all his might, Luffy’s fist comes smashing down.

Dust fills the air, blinding you. Hearing the familiar echos of Luffy’s sandals, you begin to speak out. “Luffy! Take me home to the Thousand Sunny!” You demand, your wobbling lip coming to a stand still at Luffy’s maddening grin.

“Took ya long enough. Comm’on, the crews waitin’ for you.”