Which Ewan Character Should I Make A Headcanon Alphabet For Next? I Want To Write And I'm Not Feeling

Okay, I'm taking a break from the movie and gonna share my ramblings thus far. Spoilers ahead!

The Moulin Rouge establishing number really is fun! It's just a headache when you're trying to tally screentime. I like Zidler singing and dancing.

The patrons singing "Smells Like Teen Spirit" was awesome. Gave me chills.

Toulouse has my heart! I feel like he's edited to be shorter or something though. Something feels uncanny when watching him. Idk.

Nicole Kidman's singing doesn't do it for me. It's much to soft and she's consistently drowned out by others or the background music.

"Spectacular Spectacular" sequence was really fun.

Satine abruptly trilling and saying "I feel like dancing" to the Duke got the first laugh from me. That was 30 minutes in.

"Your Song" sequence was magical. I felt transported.

Surely Zidler could tell from his telescope that Satine was unconscious while (from his pov) she was being fucked. He was okay with that. And also with spying on an intimate moment 🤢. That made me sad for Satine. Zidler might act like a silly uncle but he's still a pimp at the end of the day.

Hot take: I like the Duke. Why is he the bad guy? Cuz he has a moustache and funny accent we're supposed to understand not to like him? Are we supposed to think he's ugly therefore bad? I think the actor is handsome. He's doing a good job.

Another hot take: why does Christian love Satine? Because she's the most beautiful out of Zidler's sex workers? If Satine was a Diamond Dog instead of the Sparkling Diamond then what would happen? Does he love her because she made him think she loved him and he just couldn't get over it? I'm confused and feel like the movie doesn't want me to think about it.

I could understand Satine loving Christian easier than the reverse. He's innocent, naive, genuine, and handsome. He's the puppy and she's the master. He's completely infatuated with her. Like a puppy, he can't help but want to follow her and shower her with kisses and cuddles. If I were in Satine's place, I would appreciate that sort of blind and gentle worship when I'm sure it's not common amongst her patrons. It's still not enough for me but it makes more sense. Maybe I'll elaborate later.

What is Nini's problem? That smirk she makes behind the Duke after cluing him in to what is happening under his nose made me angry.

The Duke is genuinely trying to woo Satine and keeps getting shut down. Let us see why we shouldn't root for him! Why is Christian the better choice??? How do we know the Duke wouldn't treat Satine the same if he actually got the chance? I actually feel sorry for him because he thinks he has a shot and they're just playing in his face.

Okay, so did anyone else watch "Come What May" and think "oh my god these are their wedding vows!" 😭 I can't begin to describe how precious that gesture is. My heart!

I will agree with Zidler that rewriting the play when the show opens TOMORROW is demanding the impossible.

Satine truly loves Christian. She's not doing this because Zidler owns her, or because her coworkers are depending on her to keep their livelihood. She's doing this for him. I admire her.

I'm sorry but can anyone tell me when in the world a couple would perform the Argentinian's tango? The thought seriously has me cracking up 🤣

On a serious note: That™️ scene is viscerally powerful. I mean damn. They didn't hold back. I think I want to talk about that more later.

But while we're on the subject, let's go ahead and address the Duke. There's 36 minutes left in the movie and NOW we see he's not the right choice. 36 minutes! Also, I understand him being angry. He's right. Satine DID make him believe she loved him. She lied to his face for months. He tried to be understanding about her work. He tried to make accommodations. They were betrothed and he trusted that she was being faithful to him and honest when she said wanted him. That is not his fault. She played him and the rug was finally pulled out from under his feet. I think his pain and feelings of betrayal are understandable. Now, how he deals with that pain is not okay. And this is a bit of a parallel between him and Christian. It's not a perfect comparison at all because Christian was lied to for only 5 seconds unlike the Duke. However, I can't help but think about the difference between Christian's response to rejection and the Duke's. If we remember that Satine says her job is literally to make men fall in love with her then I imagine that the Duke's reaction is one she has dealt with far too often...

Moulin Rouge Thoughts

So guys, I've been watching Moulin Rouge, and well, I've been thinking. I've had a lot of thoughts while watching and should've done this earlier. Maybe I'll start doing it for the other Ewan reviews. But I wanted to jot down the things that cross my mind while watching because, oh boy, have things been crossing my mind. I'm just afraid that I'm going to come across as a psychopath at worst, and a dumb dumb at best. I'm trusting that y'all have better insight into this movie since it's so beloved. I only just watched it for the first time recently. Stay tuned...if you dare ☠️

I've had some time to think about it and I'm feeling better!

I reminded myself that I'm the odd one out here. Of course people think I look weird! Just because I love Star Wars and Jedi doesn't mean everyone else feels the same and know what's going on. I'm in the real world not online. The unfortunate truth is that adults who dress up in costumes will always be seen as weirdos/immature/losers etc etc. I signed up for that when I decided to step outside wearing something unconventional. It sucks that I had some negative reactions. But you know what? I've started to have some positive ones too!

A little kid recognized my costume!

I got to take a picture with a coworker who dressed up today for her first time (up till now, I've been the only person in the whole store who's been dressing up) even though she's been scared to do it all week!

An elderly person exclaimed, "WOW, I love your outfit!" When I walked past them and said they wish more people were like me where they're from!

It's been a learning experience and I'm thankful for the reality check. I don't have to play by society's rules, but doing so is gonna make me an outsider. I gotta be okay with that 🤷

Thanks again for y'all's kind words! I love you guys 🫶

I really appreciate you guys. I wore my Jedi costume to work... let's just say my coworkers weren't as supportive as y'all...

I'm genuinely bummed out. I know my costumes aren't good. I don't get them special made or anything. I just use what's in my closet or from the thrift store. This is my third costume this week and I'm starting to realize I was probably being made fun of the entire time.

I know I'm not attractive. I can't help it. I wish I looked good like everyone else. I just like dressing up cuz it's fun. It's silly and makes me happy.

I'll still do Stranger Things tomorrow since it's supposed to be a group costume (even though I'm thinking I'm gonna be left hanging) and after that, I'm not sure...

I'm glad I have y'all. When I start getting down, I think about how y'all were nice to me 💜

11. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: The Serpent's Kiss (1997)

Fun Fact! If you're a fan of the "Long Way" motorcycle series with Ewan and his best friend Charlie Boorman, then you'll be pleased to know that their friendship began on this movie! Charlie has a minor role in the film as a secretary. He and Ewan met while filming and bonded over their love of motorcycles. The rest is history!

Genre: Drama/Romance

Rating: R

Director: Philippe Rousselot

Starring: Pete Postlethwaite, Greta Scacchi, Carmen Chaplin, Ewan McGregor

Synopsis: "The Serpent's Kiss" is about the Smithers family. Mr. Smithers wants to give his wife the gift of a garden so he hires a top-notch landscaper that his in-law recommends to him. Mrs. Smithers isn't very interested in the garden but prefers games and tricks. Specifically those she can play on people. Their daughter, Ann/Thea, is a peculiar girl. She reads far too much and gets along better with nature than people. While her mother indulges her, her father worries for her health and hires a physician to "cure" her or her abnormalities. Once the young landscaper arrives, it becomes evident that he is not just there to build a garden, but to use his expertise to exact revenge for his secret employer.

Ewan Review: Ewan plays the character Meneer Chrome who is a famed Dutch landscaper. He takes a job in England with the goal of transforming the overgrown lawn of the Smithers family into a one-of-a-kind, modern, garden. As he works on the project, he becomes interested in his boss's eccentric daughter while her mother becomes interested in him. Ewan speaks in a Dutch and English accent for this role but mainly Dutch. I'm not familiar with Dutch accents but I'm going to be bold and say that his was terrible. It annoyed the crap out of me! I couldn't take it seriously, it was forced, and completely took me out of the movie every time he opened his mouth. I would've enjoyed this movie a lot more if he didn't have to use that god awful accent. He has a female love interest and two kiss scenes. One is with a man and the other is with a woman . He also does some flirting with his boss's wife. There's an implied sex scene and implied nudity. You do get to briefly see him shirtless though. He wears a wig and you also get to see the worst haircut he has ever had in a movie to date. His performance isn't very good. There were a couple moments where it felt like I was listening to him recite lines from a paper. It didn't seem like he was all in for this project but decided to coast through. This might be a nit-pick but it's not a spoiler: not long after we meet his character he randomly tosses his wig off for no discernable reason and he never puts it back on. Nobody says anything about it. All the men of high class wore wigs in the movie so I assumed for a man to walk around wigless in front of high society would be deemed offensive. Anyway, I don't know what the point of that scene was.

Screentime Percentage: Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 44/106 minutes making his SP 42%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is the movie worth watching for Ewan alone? No. Although he is in much of the movie, he just doesn't do a lot nor is he interesting. Honestly, the character is boring. I wouldn't turn this on for Ewan. Is the movie worth watching in general? Sadly, it's another no from me. In all fairness, it's so weird that it charmed me a little but I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. I don't know what audience this movie was made for.

Warning before Watching: There is a whole incest subplot in the movie. There aren't any sex scenes or anything but the movie makes sure you know they're related so keep that in mind. In a scene where Thea is overcome with emotion she intentionally cuts her face. The scenes of her being "cured" of her "illness" by the physician could also be uncomfy to watch. There's nothing graphic but you do hear her scream in pain and just the general treatment of this character is sad. Lastly, you see someone die from poison.

Where to Watch: "The Serpent's Kiss" is available to stream for free on Tubi, Sling TV, Redbox, Amazon Prime Video, and Freevee. It's also currently uploaded for free to YouTube. Just search "The Serpent's Kiss Full action Movie Drama Ewan McGregor".

Trope selection tag game

Thanks @underacalicosky for tagging me! This'll be so much fun! 💖💖💖💖 I'm going to use obikin for my responses (to no one's surprise).

💖 enemies to lovers or friends to lovers - I love both of these so much. I think I'm going to have to go with friends to lovers, but I love them bickering so that's gotta be part of the friendship too. There's just something about everyone else around them knowing that they're in love with each other (though I also really love that in an enemies to lovers fic).

💖 coffee shop au or flower shop au - I love a coffee shop au! I love Obi-Wan going to a coffee shop for his tea fix just because there's the cute guy (Anakin, obvs) who always takes his order and draws little doodles on his cup. Or an Obi-Wan who, again, doesn't really like the taste of coffee but he loves the smell so he's actually really good at managing the coffee shop he owns that Anakin basically lives in. I will say, though, that Calico had a really good argument for a flower shop au in their post. So in that spirit, imagine a flower shop au where Anakin hates flowers (so me, that's why coffee shop will win every time for me) but applies for a job at the flower shop he passes on his way to campus when he sees the help wanted sign, all because he's had a crush on the hot owner (Obi-Wan) since it opened. A few months into Obi-Wan finds out that Anakin hates flowers and asks why he applied in the first place. Anakin's brain shorts out and tells him the truth. They date (and fuck) about it.

💖 hurt/comfort or there was only one bed - Only one bed by a landslide. I'm in a place in life where, if I had to choose, there would be little to no hurt in anything I read.

💖 found family or partners in crime - I love these both so much, but I'm going to have to go with found family. I'm obsessed with Obi-Wan and Anakin being Ahsoka’s dads, and found family just means so much to me in general.

💖 canon compliant or canon divergent - Has to be canon divergent because obikin deserves a happy ending. There can be compliant stuff there, but I need that happy ending.

💖 fluff or angst with a happy ending - I'm going to have to go with fluff. I can get through angst with a happy ending, but depending on how much angst and if it's all posted or if I have to wait and stew on it until an update it's actually really hard for me. I probably sound like such a weenie. Lol.

💖 1st person POV or 3rd person POV - 3rd person for sure.

💖 soulmates or forbidden love - I love a good soulmates/soulmark fic! So soulmates.

💖 roommates or fake dating - Calico cheated so I'm going to, too. Roommates who are fake dating is also my answer. 🤣

💖 slow burn or meet-cute - I'm all about that meet-cute!

💖 love triangle or polyamorous relationship - If I had to pick one I'd go with a poly relationship, but neither are really my thing.

💖 royalty au or magic au - I love a royalty au!

💖 high school/college au or neighbours au - I'm going to cheat again and say a neighbors au where Anakin's in college, or they're both in high school, or Anakin's in high school and Obi-Wan's in college, or something.

💖 mutual pining or idiots to lovers - I honestly kind of think they're the same thing. But I'll go with idiots to lovers.

I have no idea who's already played, but my no pressure tags are: @loycspotting @starpains @unspuncreature @kingdomvel @kenobisrightboot

I finally did it...I want to die.

I'm sorry. Y'all didn't follow for all this sad stuff. I don't have people offline to share my vulnerable self with so easily. I've tried and tried to push through and figure things out by myself. I just feel like an absolute wreck of a person. I'm not even a person. I have something I must do that I've been putting off, and of course, it must be done alone. I'm very scared and angry and crying as I type this. I can only hope against hope against hope against HOPE that I will finally receive peace when it is done. That I can move on and be normal and happy and a real person again. The kind of person you'll like. I've let my family down. I've let myself down. And I feel like I've let you down. Things will be different. They'll be better. I have to believe it.

I actually just watched this scene yesterday! I haven't seen the play so I'm going off the movie. My opinion is option A. Before Christian starts singing, he is reciting the lyrics which means that he didn't make it up on the spot. Now, I don't think he was necessarily prepared to start singing. That part was spontaneous. Otherwise, he would have began by singing instead of spoken word. What do you guys think?

okay real talk do we think when christian performs your song for satine is it a) the poem/song he had prepared to audition for her or b) he was so inspired by seeing her that he abandoned the previously prepared material and came up with this on the spot

another one! actually guys follow my tiktok -..

If you received this, you are a great mutual 🫂 Send this to 10 of your mutuals to spread love ❤️❤️❤️

Thank you! 🤗🫶

Your questions are so good omg. I’ll get to the rest of them after I go for a walk XD

i know this was from a couple days ago but I still wanna say thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed the questions. I had so much fun asking them and really loved reading your answers 😊

GUYS! GUYS! GUYS! Look at what I bought at the Thrift Store today!!!

I went to the thrift store to buy clothes and didn't find anything I wanted so I decided to peruse the movie section and I saw this gem! I almost screamed! I LOVE this movie so much; I can't believe I'm so lucky to have found it! I now have two Ewan McGregor movies, yay!