One Thing You Need To Know About Me Is That I Am Constantly Having Insane Galaxy Genius Ancient Greek

I hate queer discourse so much.

people are saying that it's "bad to support Maia (the no fly list leaker) because it's a bi lesbian"

literally none of this matters at all. queer discourse is a fake issue ment to distract you from actual bigotry and issues that affect the lives of queer people, and make you think that your enemies are other queer people.

think for five fucking seconds. this person just exposed national secrets (which should not have been secret in the first place). she is now going to be the target of thousands of people, transphobes, us nationalist, feds, and people who were exposed for being on the no fly list. are you seriously going to the people harassing it because it uses a label you were told you should hate?

I'm not saying you have to love this person. you don't even have to agree with her. but saying it's bad because of a label that literally no one has a problem with or even cares about offline is fucking stupid. either be happy for it, or ignore it. don't go out of your way to join in her harassment because of a label you hate for no reason other than people told you that you should.

hate cunts who are like "well maybe this piece of art doesn't mean anything" Your desire for simplicity is boring! Bitch!!!!! everything in the whole world means everything 2 me ....

My dad and I once had a disagreement over him using the adage "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

I said, "That's just not true. Sometimes what doesn't kill you leaves you brittle and injured or traumatized."

He stopped and thought about that for a while. He came back later, and said, "It's like wood glue."

He pointed to my bookshelf, which he helped me salvage a while ago. He said, "Do you remember how I explained that, once we used the wood glue on them, the shelves would actually be stronger than they were before they broke?"

I did.

"But before we used the wood glue, those shelves were broken. They couldn't hold up shit. If you had put books on them, they would have collapsed. And that wood glue had to set awhile. If we put anything on them too early, they would have collapsed just the same as if we'd never fixed them at all. You've got to give these things time to set."

It sounded like a pretty good metaphor to me, but one thing I did pick up on was that whatever broke those shelves, that's not the thing that made them stronger. That just broke them. It was being fixed that made them stronger. It was the glue.

So my dad and I agreed, what doesn't kill you doesn't actually make you stronger, but healing does. And if you feel like healing hasn't made you stronger than you were before, you're probably not done healing. You've got to give these things time to set.

Happy new year to all queers, weirdos, people with 20939384737 pronouns, people with no pronouns, multigender people, aspec people, xenogender users, neopronouns users, he/him lesbians and she/her gays, people who mold gender to their liking, people with extremely niche microlabels, lesboys, turigirls, mspec lesbians, mspec gays, mspec straights, straightbians, gaybians, straight gays/straightcians, queerhets, transhets, intersex people, dykes, butches, femmes, bears, twinks, and everyone under the lgbtq+ umbrella. Let’s make 2023 the most radical queer year of all. Never stop being you

 “Santo cielo!” Luigi cried out, laughing as the ghost continued his faithful administration of their usual morning greetings. The Italian did his best to control the beast, hand phasing through the spectral form as he tried to push Polterpup away. “Down, doggy, down! I’m up, I’m up!”

SAME MAN I WAS BEFORE: Chapter 8

cop shows are like "dammit! we would have caught babyeater mike by now if people didn't have rights,"

slightly punk-looking teenager on a cop show: i wont talk. i know my rights

cops behind interrogation room glass: damn. this one teenager won’t cooperate. now we’ll never catch Fuckhands the Baby Murderer. and it’s all because the police doesn’t have absolute authority. this is terrible

grandmas across the world: damn, good point

Should go without saying but never date a cop and christ never marry one. Rule of thumb if he's legally untouchable he's ethically unfuckable. You don't like that cop, you like buff men in tight clothing. I can show you more of those, better ones. Take my hand.

So there’s a trend that I absolutely hate in online discussions of (non-satirical) genre, particularly genre that’s influenced by the gothic. This trend makes my eyes roll back in my head until I can see through my own skull. It makes me want to bite a car in half. It makes me want to step into the jellyfish tank at the New York Aquarium and beg for the sweet sweet annihilation of a thousand stings. 

I call this trend: Oh Just Be Sensible, and it goes like this:

“Why do vampires always end up covered in blood when they feed, I don’t spill soup all down the front of my shirt when I eat dinner. Real toddler energy.”

“Why do people always cut their hands to swear oaths, everyone knows it would hurt way less on the [insert body part with fewer nerve endings]”

“Vampires shouldn’t be feeding from people’s wrists, it damages the tendons, if doctors don’t take your blood from your wrist, vampires shouldn’t either! No one will be able to flex their fingers the next day.”

(This comes up a lot with vampires, I mention, as I stride purposefully into the glistening mass of jellyfish.)

There are direct answers for some of these when it comes to the practical visual language of a particular medium (for example, you cut your hand on stage / on set because you can hold a blood pack in there, and even if you don’t have an effect, the gesture and its purpose can be discerned from the nosebleeds) but what really gets me is how thematically boneheaded this sort of observation is. 

Like, let’s go down the list here. 

Why do vampires end up covered in their victims’ blood? Well Scoob, do you think it could maybe have something to do with their bestial, inhuman nature? Or with the erotic and sensual abandon with which they can approach violence, now that they’re untethered from human morals? 

Why do people cut their hands to swear oaths? Aside from what I mentioned above, do you think maybe it’s because it adds a layer of gravity to see two people swearing an oath to one another with blood dripping from their clasped hands? Do you think it’s maybe to evoke a unity of body, something greater and more primal than a unity of word? Or maybe to remind us of the dire consequences of breaking a blood oath?

Why are authors having vampires feed from people’s wrists if it damages their tendons? Damn, maybe that’s because it’s where the pulse is. You know, the pulse? The heartblood, the thing that races when you’re scared or turned on or both? The thing that stutters when you’re close to death and could, should the author choose, ring in the vampire’s ears like a chime or a great pounding thunderclap. Maybe in a story about undead beings who drink blood, we can sacrifice a bit of sensible reality in order to enforce the emotion and thematic heft of a scene? 

Images like these communicate what is happening between two characters, not just the events that are transpiring! No one making stories forgot to consider ~sensible~ little observations, because it would be absolutely inane to consider an observation with the creative value of a wet paper towel. This stuff is part of our visual language for a reason! Themes also need to be communicated! 

God, like, okay, I’m exhausted and the aquarium staff keeps yelling at me when they find me here, but let me just wrap up by saying that relationships, character and meaning are expressed in so many ways beyond dialogue or internal monologue, and those expressions are so rarely sensible. 

(Also all this shit looks cool as hell, do you really want your protagonists swearing to die for one another by dabbing their slightly bleeding elbows together, grow up.)

I'm gonna cook clear crystal meth and put edible glitter in it and call it Silly Meth