Luxlila

I keep telling myself I am going to give guys a chance, but every single time the opportunity presents itself I shut it down. I do not think it has anything to do with fear of intimacy at this point. I have so much going on right now with getting my degree, doing lab research, learning a new language, getting all 3 of my healthcare certification renewed, working out 5 days a week, etc, etc. I just do not have the time or the patience to entertain anyone right now. What's crazy is when I tell people that I never been in a relationship, and do not plan on being in one anytime soon, I get side eyed. But it's like I am so young, and I feel like I have all my life to fall in love and go on dates and do all that relationship stuff. Maybe I am missing out, maybe I'm not. But I do know that I am in a good place in my life and I am super excited for what the next couple of years of my life have in store in me.

My first day of university starts tomorrow and I STILL DO NOT KNOW WHERE MY CLASSES ARE. I am going to loose it. :(

Fall season means having a new Tumblr theme and a getting a whole new personality.

Is hypergamy inherently transactional, and if so, does it risk commodifying relationship?

It doesn't surprise me at all that somebody would view hypergamy to be something that is inherently transactional the way it's showcased on social media. When you scroll through the hypergamy tag on TikTok, all you're going to see is tons of videos by beautiful woman who seem to to live the life - taken on expensive trips and shopping sprees, spoiled like a princess by their so called boyfriends, and living an enviably luxurious lifestyle. Nine times out of ten, she’s either a SW, staging it for views and attention, or trying to sell you something—a course, a consultation, a book, or some other product.

The version of “hypergamy” often showcased on TikTok is inherently transactional. Many of the women presenting themselves as “spoiled girlfriends” are, in reality, engaging in SW. This dynamic involves exchanging physical favors for money, which is fundamentally different from hypergamy. Despite the narratives pushed by some SWs, the two concepts are not interchangeable.The lines often blur in online spaces, which I find quite weird but it’s particularly concerning for young girls who come across videos of women being showered with gifts, roses, and luxurious lifestyles without realizing that, more often than not, these women are offering certain favors in return and this lack of transparency can be dangerously misleading.

Hypergamy is not a new concept or a trend that has arisen in recent years. It has existed since the dawn of humanity and will continue to do so because most women will always be attracted to men who can provide them with a good life, much in the same way that men are attracted to beautiful woman, it’s just a fundamental aspect of human nature and rooted in biology and social conditioning. Does that mean a man will settle down with a woman just because she's beautiful or that a woman will settle down with any rich man? In most cases, that’s not the case—unless they lack discernment or are extremely desperate. Attraction and relationships are far more complex than just beauty or wealth.

You can’t build a healthy, lasting relationship on something as superficial as good looks or wealth alone. Yes, physical attraction and financial stability are very important factors but there are many other key factors at play and no man in his right mind is going to marry a woman just for her looks or in exchange for physical favors. A woman who has married well will keep her mouth shut about it and care about her privacy and reputation, you're not gonna catch her filming videos of a day in her life as a spoiled girlfriend or trophy wife, she's not going to give you tips on how to bag a man and what manipulation strategies to use because those tips don't work in the long haul unless you want to attract narcissists or unstable man.

A woman who attracted a quality man did it by becoming one herself. The most reliable way for a woman to marry well is by focusing on becoming the best version of herself—not for the purpose of attracting a wealthy partner, but for her own growth and self-worth. Women who have genuinely succeeded in hypergamy don’t make online videos or share intimate details of their lives. They know the power of privacy, dignity, and self-respect.

Women who marry well do so not just because of their looks, but because they have dedicated themselves to personal growth in every aspect of their lives. They invest in their education, build meaningful careers, and refine their skills, improve in every aspect of their life while also cultivating a strong, supportive social circle. I don’t believe in opposites attract; you attract who you are. The quality of the partner you draw into your life reflects the person you’ve worked to become.

Cant wait to get back from university and start my mini garden

practice, practice and practice. Practice your ideal self privately so that publicly you don’t fumble or feel awkward. Practice the way your ideal self walks, talks, lives, eats, everything even when you’re alone. Over time, your body will get so used to it that it will come to you naturally.

Me 🤝 Turning in 3 assignments late my first week back at school.