I’m tired of fighting. This battle has gone on too long and I have grown tired and weary. These nights I spend alone, not a friend in sight. I isolate & when I disassociate, I wake up in my own blood. I drown myself in alcohol so I don’t have to feel my feelings & when I feel nothing I drink to feel something. it’s a fucked up paradox, but here I am. I can feel the end. I’m scared. I reached out to professionals but they don’t believe me. My own best friend deserted me with no explanation when they promised they’d be here through thick and thin. I’m tired of being me. I’ve changed, I’ve done better, but at the end of the day I still feel so fucking empty and lost. I feel like I can’t go on, but I push through. I’ve never hated myself so much in my life, and I just want peace.
“You’ll break your own heart if you fall in love with ideas and not people.”
— Bridgett Devoue
“When you lose a person, a whole universe goes along with them.”
— Lang Leav
ur not evil babe ur experiencing a human emotion
“I am not lucky. You know what I am? I am smart. I am talented. I take advantage of the opportunities that come my way, and I work really, really hard. Don’t call me lucky. Call me a badass.”
— Shonda Rimes
“You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude towards what happens to you. And in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.”
— Brian Tracy
You were suspicious of their feelings because you had no reason to love yourself—not your body, not your mind. You rejected so much gentleness. What were you looking for?
Carmen Maria Machado, from In the Dream House: A Memoir
“It’s funny how someone who was just a stranger last year, can mean so much to you now. It’s terrible that someone who meant so much to you last year, can be just a stranger now.”
— Unknown
MILK AND HONEY pt.3