Okay Maybe I'm Grasping At Nothing, But Hear Me Out:

Chai tea bag + lil but of brown sugar + apple cider packet + 16 oz. mug of hot but not quite boiling water

it will not Fix You but like. maybe. maybe.

“I win.”

Hi. Answer whenever you want but F6 team after they first capture Owen time travel to post Hobbs and Shaw? Owen doesn't approve of Hobbs, Roman is trying to figure out why future him is dating Owen, and everyone else is cracking jokes about the broody Owen being related to the very family oriented Deckard and Magdalene?

Omg, it's almost like a reverse of my fic Dear Future Self! I love it!!

I absolutely love the idea of F6 Roman staring at his future self with a future Owen. He'd just gape like a fish and pointing back and forth between them

~~~

Luke glared at Owen Shaw, who looked far too smug with his hands cuffed behind his back and having been punched by Brian

"This is how it's going to go down," Shaw sneered at Dom, who stood across from him and looked ready to murder the Brit

But before Shaw could get another word out, Luke felt the world fall out from beneath him

Letting out a shout, Luke tried to scramble to purchase, but found thin air pass through his fingers. He could hear several other shouts from the crew as he felt himself keep falling through a seemingly endless void

Finally, the ground met him. Face first

Grunting, Luke let himself lay on the grassy ground for a moment. He could hear people moving on the ground near him

Lifting his head, he saw the crew laid out near him. Dom was checking on Letty as Brian was calling out to Tej

But Luke didn't see Roman, Gisele, or Han anywhere

Along with Shaw

"What the hell did that bastard do?" Luke growled to himself as he got to his feet. Looking around, Luke's eyes went wide

Why in the fresh hell were they in his backyard?

"Anyone know where we are?" Brian asked

Turning back to them, Luke could see that they were all on their feet and looking around equally as confused

"I'm not sure, but it looks like we're in LA." Luke told them

Before anyone could say anything else, they heard a door open. Frowning, Luke saw the back door slide open to reveal a man Luke had never seen before

He was bald, but smaller than Luke and was wearing an oversized hoodie, with DSS written across the chest

Luke couldn't help but think he looked adorable

The man raised an eyebrow at them

"What the bloody hell are you lot doing here?"

"We're not really sure." Dom spoke up, glancing between the man and Luke. "Mind telling us?"

"LA, Hobbs residence." The man drawled

"Hobbs?" Tej asked, eyes narrowed

"This is my house, but it doesn't explain why we're on the other side of the world." Luke snapped and turned towards the stranger. "How'd we get here?"

"How the bloody hell am I supposed to know?" The man glared at him. "You're the ones who showed up on my lawn!"

"Yours?" Luke sputtered

"Well, half his."

Luke blinked

A man who looked exactly like him stepped next to the man and wrapped an arm around him

"What's your is mine." The man mumbled as he pouted up at the other Luke

"I'll try saying that when I want to drive one of your fancy cars, princess." The other Luke chuckled. "Let me talk to them and see what's going on."

The man glanced at the crew before going further into the house

"Someone want to explain what's happening?" The other Luke asked

"One second we were arresting Owen Shaw and the next, we're here." Brian tells him bluntly. "Do you know where that bastard is? The asshole kidnapped my wife."

"That was years ago." The other Luke frowned

"What do you mean?" Letty questioned. "We were just there!"

"Well, now you're not." The other Luke sighed. "Its been several years since that happened. Brian, don't worry about Mia, she's safe and sound. All of you are actually. Back in the states and with your families."

"And Shaw?" Dom asked

The other Luke sighed heavily at that and gave a half heart shrug

"He visits every other week."

"What the fuck does that mean?" Luke hissed

"Deckard," the other Luke nodded towards the house. "Is Owen's older brother. Meaning Owen visits often."

"You got with Shaw's brother?" Tej asked incredulously and then let out a low whistle. "You got some game, Hobbs!"

"Thanks." The other Luke snorted in amusement. "He's not like Owen exactly. He absolutely loves his family and has gone on a war path to destroy those who hurt his loved ones."

"Seems like big brother's code is also family." Dom sneered

"It's what his whole family believes." The other Luke shrugged. "Owen's just a bitter asshole sometimes."

"A fucking hypocrite more like." Brian snorted

The sound of the door sliding opening again made them all look at Deckard, who looked exasperated

"If you've been wondering where Pearce was, I found him." He huffed

The other Luke started to laugh

"Let me guess, he and Oh?"

"Yep."

"This is going to be fun."

Luke shared a concerned look with the rest of the crew

What was so funny?

---

Roman could only stare at the marble counter as his mind tried to process what had happened in the last twenty minutes

One second he was about to jump on Shaw for kidnapping Mia, and the next he was landing on plus carpet of a fancy bedroom

To only look up and see himself on top of Owen Shaw

Completely naked

It had been equally shocking to see Shaw roll them off the bed and take cover. A gun appeared in his hands as he pointed it at Roman and the Owen Shaw Roman knew

After a lot of shouting, Roman's other self ushered him out while grabbing a silk robe. They left the Shaws in the bedroom

"Look, I'm not sure how to explain it." His other self laughed nervously

"Yeah, how do you explain sticking your dick in the enemy?" Roman snapped

"He's not our enemy anymore. Owen's actually joined the crew."

"How?"

"It's, uh, a long store." His other self said sheepishly. "All you need to know is that Owen is actually really cute when he's not scheming to take down the world."

"Aw, Ro, no need for flattery." Owen Shaw's voices purred

Snapping his head up, Roman saw the Shaws coming out of the bedroom

The other Shaw was dressed in tight pants with a loose fitting tank top, while the Shaw Roman knew looked indifferent

"Only for you, baby." The other Roman smiled widely

Roman could only watch in horror as his other pulled Shaw into a short kiss. Glancing over at his Shaw, Roman was met with a considering look

Gulping, Roman could only hope the madness would end

~~~

Sorry it's not a full story, but I hoped you enjoy friend!

Problem: Jason Statham has 2 decades on Vanessa Kirby and yet in a flashback in Hobbs & Shaw their characters are shown as being close in age.

Easy solution: Hattie is aging incredibly well & is much older than she appears

Funny solution: Deckard is actually in his mid thirties and is aging like pure shit because his life is hell and the stress is causing him to shrivel up like an apple doll

Unique job and power combinations

A search and rescuer with the power of flight who can fly to reach stranded victims or get an aerial view of a scene.

A civillain who can regenerate limbs and certain organs like kidneys regularily donates them for transplants.

Reporter who can hear and eavesdrop through walls and great distances.

A Baker who never burns their goods because they can control heat.

A sewer worker who can purify water or control toxic fumes.

A builder with the power of telekenisis. Who needs a crane?

A vet who can talk to animals.

A doctor who can see broken bones with x-ray vision.

A welder who welds not with a torch but their own laser vision.

A detective with empath-like powers to feel others emotions, like guilt.

A spy who can mentally tap in to as well as scramble radio frequencies.

Someone who is renowned for cleaning up accidents like car crashes or explosions that involve toxic materials because of their immunity to it.

A villain who can't lie.

A DJ who can control sound waves, and dosent even require equipment.

A lifeguard who can breath under water.

A plumber who can control water can minimize water damage, stop leaking, easily detect where in a pipe a blockage is and more.

A pilot who can control wind can fly in almost any weather, prevent planes from crashing, and can do aerial maneuvers other pilots can only dream of.

A lawyer or news reporter who cannot lie. They struggle to get a job.

A miner or cave explorer/rescuer with echo location. They can easily traverse twisting caves, never getting lost, even without a light source.

An international spy who can shapeshift into different animals like a stray cat, a pidgeon or rat to eavesdrop.

A scientist with iron skin, who can't suffer chemical or heat burns should experiments go wrong.

A programmer who can run code through their own mind and manipulate it.

A first responder who can control electricity requires no defibrillator, and has a much higher sucsess rate then one anyway.

A gardener who can control plants can easily farm otherwise hard to farm plants like truffle.

A jeweler who can control metal that can easily fix broken jewelry, instantly detect fakes, and can alter ring sizes without machinery.

What did the Shaw siblings want to be when they were younger?

Hmmm. Now that is a bit of a toughy

-I see Hattie always wanting to be a spy or part of the royal guard. She admires all the queens and would think the noblest thing to do would be a guard for the queen

Or a spy to help their country stay powerful and keep the queen happy

-As for Owen, I think he wanted to be a lot of things- it depended on what he was doing that month

He wanted to be a singer, a football player, a dancer, a rower, a hacker, a thief, a cop, a composer, the prime minister, the king, etc

Owen was convinced he could do it all

-Finally, I think Deckard was the one forced to be realistic in his dreams, especially having to grow up so fast and raise his siblings

So, I can see Deckard wanting to be a famous chef, but knowing that was just a dream

Instead, he knew with what his mother, father, and uncle had trained him to do would dictate his life and the life of a soldier or spy would suit him best

Or that of a stay at home parent, but he wasn't ready for that life just yet. Not when he already was living that life with Owen and Hattie at the moment

Thanks for the question friend!

Sometimes twitter delivers

mcu + incorrect quotes 4/?

De Aged Fic Part 8

Part 7

About two months ago, Deckard had gotten a call from Madam M, telling him Owen had been up to something. He had finally succeeded in getting one of M's girls to join his crew and M wasn't happy about it at all

She had already hated Owen's guts before this, so it didn't shock Deckard that the only reason Owen was even alive at the moment was because M didn't want Deckard killing her

However, he took her warning and was trying to keep at least close to where Owen was. Just in case the little bastard's plan did go tits up

Now, lounging in one of his mother's luxury suites, Deckard received another phone call. He had been expecting it to be someone telling him Owen was either hurt, or Owen himself crowing about a job well done

But, instead, it was a voice he hadn't heard in years

"Deck?"

He had gone stiff as a board, fingers almost losing the grip on his phone. It had taken him only a moment to recover, but to him it felt like an eternity

"Hatts?" Deckard choked out. But before she could respond, new panic swept through him. "What's wrong? Are you hurt? Are you in trouble?"

He knew he shouldn't be asking her, especially after how clear she had made it that she didn't want any contact from him

"I'm fine." She said softly. "But it's Owen..."

His worse fears seemed to be coming true as Hattie sighed deeply

"He's... well, he's not like he is normally."

"What do you mean?" Deckard was perplexed

"I'm not sure how to describe it. I think it'd be better if you talked to him."

"All right."

After a few moments, Deckard could hear two voices faintly before:

"Deck!"

Flinching away from his phone, Deckard hadn't been expecting a young child's voice to practically scream in his ear

"Deck, are you big too? Hatts is really, really tall! Am I going to be tall? That's what she said, but I don't believe her, she lied about my toy yesterday, after all. Where are you? Can you come make me something to eat?"

Blinking rapidly, Deckard didn't know how to respond. If he wasn't mistaken, that sounded just like Owen when he was little. But that couldn't be possible

"Oh, give me the phone." Hattie's voice was faint

"No! I wanna talk to Deck! You got your turn!"

"Owen! Give me the bloody phone!"

"No!"

"Oh," Deckard called out softly. "Let me talk to Hatts, ok? We need to talk so I can come see you?"

"Fine." Owen mumbled, and Deckard could only imagine the pout on the boy's face

"Little brat!" Hattie hissed into the phone. "I don't remember him being this horrible!"

"Mostly because you weren't the one dealing with it." Deckard said lightly

"I wasn't that bad, was I?"

"No," Deckard smiled. "You were worse sometimes."

"I was not!"

"If you say so." He chuckled, but quickly sobered. "So, this is really happening?"

"Yeah," she sighed. "I don't know how, but it is. He called me earlier and I found him at home. Says he was picked up by some people, most likely cops, but got away."

Deckard nodded and thought for a second

"Why did you call me?" He asked gently

"Because I've already had to deal with him for a few hours, and I'm sick of him." She huffed

"And I dealt with him for all of his life. Your point?" He drawled

"I can't take care of a kid, Deck. Let alone Owen."

"Are you sure you want me there?"

The question hung between them for a minute, and Deckard could feel the tension building inside him. He desperately wanted to see him little brother and sister

"If you can help me figure out how to change him back."

Ignoring the relief flooding through him, Deckard started to plan

"I can be there in about an hour. Does he need anything? Clothes, food, entertainment?"

"Sleeping pills."

"We're not drugging our brother, Hatts."

"Fine. You get him to sleep then."

With that, Hattie hung up. Good thing Deckard knew where she lived