Strong Jaskier Who Doesn't Realize How Strong He Is?

"average cat owner spends 3 years in prison" factoid actualy just statistical error. average owner spends 0 years in prison. Miette's mother, who kicked her body like the football and went to jail for One Thousand Years is an outlier adn should not have been counted

When Nico and Will get engaged they go back to camp half blood to share the news. As they’re chatting and catching up a glowing sun appears over Nico’s head- the sign of Apollo. Everyone falters in confusion, including Chiron. Nonetheless he starts the whole “hail the son of Apollo” spiel when the symbol changes to a darker one, the sign of Hades. Chiron stops and starts again- “Hail the son of-“ He doesn’t get time to finish. The sign of Apollo flashes again. Sign of Hades. Sign of Apollo. Sign of Hades. Everyone is still in an awkward kneeling position except Will. Nico at this point has his head bowed in exasperation and his hand over his eyes. Will is stifling a laugh. The signs continue flipping in rapid succession. The sign of Apollo flashes one last time. There’s a pause.

The sign of Hades appears over Will’s head.

I was talking to my friend the other day about a dude I know, and I called him a “funky lil’ guy”. The response I recieved was somewhere along the lines of “he’s literally taller than you so you can’t say that”

My guy, you simply do not understand. Funky lil’ guys aren’t little, they’re lil. It’s purely vibe based

the moon will sing a song for me i loved you like the sun!

what you need to understand about recommending a show to me is that no matter how much we both know I'll like it, I can't watch it until the Neurodivergence Department in my brain approves it. I don't know when that will be, and I don't have any more control over it than you do.

So Jaskier, completely shitfaced, is sitting somewhere on the dirty floor near a tavern in Oxenfurt, when he meets Vesemir for the first time.

He instantly recognizes the old witcher and loudly calls him over, something along the lines of "Hey! Hey you- you, wolf! Papa wolf! Yeah, come on, I need to have a word with you about your son. The- the stupid one-"

Vesemir is obviously not amused, but he comes over nonetheless because for some reason that drunk kid knows him.

Then, Jaskier proceeds to ramble on about Geralt and it gets very close to trash talk, but Vesemir keeps his cool and reads in between the lines. What he finds out is this: Geralt - who up to this point had been his favorite - had somehow managed to break this poor kid's heart, not once, not twice but "at least five times". Said kid had apparently "spent more than half of his life" following his son like a lost puppy. He mumbles something about elves and djinns and then tells this elaborate tale of a golden dragon. "And then he left me on a fucking mountain!" Vesemir for his part would have not believed any of this, if the name Yennefer hadn't fallen. Many of the unreasonable things Geralt does are related to Yennefer.

The old witcher then takes a closer look at the sod on the floor and oh yes, didn't Geralt say something about a bard?

Then suddenly the kid stops mid sentence as if remembering something important. He waves at one of the other young men and loudly asks "Oi Mikael, is there- is there class tomorrow!?" Vesemir doesn't show it but he's kind of shocked. The drunk kid is clearly a student at the Academy, way too young to be traveling with a witcher. What ln earth is Geralt thinking?!

When the other man, for some reason looking as shocked as Vesemir feels, answers the kid's question with "yes", the bardling seems to sober up by a lot. He staggers up, wishes Vesemir a good night and starts to stumble towards Oxenfurt Academy, quickly followed by the other student.

The last thing Vesemir hears before they walk out of side is how the student asks the bard "Does that mean we won't have to write that test tomorrow, professor?"

Professor. Vesemir needs a break.

imagine twilight but Bella is gay and her and Edward just become such close friends that he wants to turn her because finally someone who reads around here

Dude even had the audacity to say “you’re slipping” when will only cut one of the three stings holding horace’s hands together

Why have I not seen LITERALLY ANYONE talk about how in Erak’s Ransom, when Will saves the group, Horace yells “Will!!” And holds up his tied hands AND WILL SHOOTS IT AND FREES HIM??? LIKE THAT WAS SO COOL WHY DO WE NEVER TALK ABOUT THAT????? The fact that, number one, Horace knew Will was skilled enough to do it, number two, Horace TRUSTED Will not to shoot his hand, number three, Will understood what Horace wanted him to do, and finally, the fact that WILL WAS ABLE TO DO IT IN THE FIRST PLACE?? Now obviously rangers are very trained and blah blah blah but THATS STILL BADASS????

yaehh

Sunflower

OC Elizabeth Swan || Angst || Fluff || Mentions of Suicide

Chapter 1: Coming Home

Chapter 2: Open Wound

Chapter 3: Collide

Chapter 4: The End

Chapter 5: The Beginning

Chapter 6: coming soon