It's Strange How A Few Short Seconds Can Lead You In A Whole New Direction,

It's strange how a few short seconds can lead you in a whole new direction,

It alters how you think and act and see your own reflection.

From a single moment on, my life was forever changed,

Like everything I previously knew had suddenly been rearranged.

No one will ever understand just how I felt that day,

But deep within this poem I shall try to convey.

I cannot even begin to illustrate the repulsive person I once knew.

I intend to simply express the horror that I went through.

I was abruptly pinned against the wall of a hard, rough concrete bathroom

Small blade across my cheek, how can i explain i couldnt move i couldnt scream. Fear takes over your body as threats are whispered in your ear.

"just come with me and the end will be near"

Suddenly I was captured, no possible way to escape.

Wondering if I deserved it, if it was truly my fate.

I tried to fly away, but my wings he had been broke.

I was like an innocent cow that he used to prod and poke.

My mind filled with confusion, and his filled with lust.

He took another part of me with each and every thrust.

Tears like elegant pearls gracefully danced down my face.

I peered into his soul with a firm look of disgrace.

His cold touch like a vacuum, sucking out the life in me.

His ears were wide open, but he wouldn't hear my plea.

Standing there in the night, so scared, so exposed.

I was covered by a veil of darkness, like satin petals of a rose.

The glowing moon looked down at me, peaking through a massive blanket of stars.

I could touch it; it seemed so close, but it was really oh so far.

Worse than at the doctor; he injected me with filth and dirt.

His intention was deliberate; it was very clear and overt.

It is a bit funny that a piece of scum is all he'll ever be,

And the only thing that he accomplished doing in life is me.

Sometimes late at night I simply can't fall sleep

Thinking about how my innocence is no longer mine to keep.

What some can only imagine in their worst possible nightmare

Is my gruesome reality that can't be undone nor repaired.

I may have the sweetest smile, glowing between my nose and chin,

But only I know the truth about the deep secrets held within.

I may have the prettiest eyes that have seen more than they should

And have cried more delicate tears than anyone else ever could.

I may have the kindest heart, but that came with a cost.

It has felt the worst of pains and experienced the greatest loss.

I cannot change the past, an event to which I succumbed.

But I can focus on the present and change what is to come. 

We are all so different and yet so much the same.

Everyone, in some way or another, will experience a kind of pain.

Everybody has things they wish not to recall,

Into each life some rain must fall.

Scattered throughout our lives, like a friend that is one of a kind,

Dreary days will steadily approach, bad memories trailing behind.

These dark days are necessary, just as important as the rest,

For if we didn't have the worst, we couldn't recognize the best.

__________________________

Now here i am holding on to my new fav shirt,

which has your Cologne

its as if your here though i know your slipping away.

yes i can call for help

yes i can find a way to runaway

but when someone can hurt you in a matter of seconds

what will happen if help takes too long

what happens when your feet cant keep up with the violent pounding of your heart

there will always be blank spaces in this story and those spaces are filled with fear

fear can consume you more than you could ever know.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

its funny how you can sit and write a poem

while the other person watches you

not understanding a word thats being written

language barriers come in handy sometimes..

______

i probably lost you though i have never given up

time is the only enemy

i still love you since we said hello

its wierd how i never agreed with the phrase: if you love him let him go.... if he returns you were always ment to be...

i cry too much,i dont want to let him go... but i cant keep causing him pain.

im being too selfish for loving him..