Hi my name is Don Quixote of La Mancha the Knight of the Rueful Figure and I have a rueful figure (that's how I got my name) with purple bruised ribs and tall stature and gaunt features and hair turning gray and a rather hooked aquiline nose and large black drooping mustaches and a lot of people tell me I look like Amadís of Gaul (AN: if u don’t know who he is begone!). I’m not related to Lady Oriana but I wish I was because she’s an incomparable flowering beauty. I’m a knight errant but some of my teeth and grinders are missing. I have long lank limbs. I’m also a defender of damsels, protector of orphans, succourer of the needy, righter of wrongs, undoer of injustice, and I wander a magic countryside called the mountains of Spain where I’m in my first year of knighthood (I’m forty-nine). I’m a gentleman (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly armor. I love my great-grandfather's forgotten corner of the house and I cobble together all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a doublet of fine cloth with matching shoes and velvet breeches and a helmet, morion, visor, breastplate and backpiece. I was riding outside La Mancha. It was early morning so the rays of the sun fell obliquely and the heat did not distress me, which I was very happy about. A lot of giants stared at me. I put up my pasteboard visor at them.
artists fuck better because we turn sex into art, masterpieces, mattresses become canvases where we can paint our love to someone with bodies.
I’ve always wanted to go to a house party like you see in movies but I never found out about any. Was too busy in the monastery where I was trained to kill
theres apparently a strain of weed named white yoda?
man whose body is possessed by the spirits of a vampire and an italian respectively. italian takes over, goes to mass, eats garlic, and has a nice day in the sun. vampire takes over and is like “wow why do i feel like shit”
why do we sleep on wrestling? it’s boomer riverdale. there’s an undead guy who’s controlled by a little dude with an urn that has his parents’ ashes in them. someone almost gets buried alive in an actual grave (in the ring). there was a plotline in steve austin’s rivalry with WWE owner vince mcmann where there rivalry is interrupted by an entity called the higher being who leads a cult that crucifies wrestlers. they kidnap vince mcmann’s daughter to make her marry an undead wizard. mcmann comes on the big screen and demands the higher being removes his mask- and when he does, it’s VINCE MCMANN. at one point someone drove a truck into the ring and started spraying water
TL;DR: professional wrestling is high camp