I Had A Dream About Columbo At A Drag Show. This Is What Came From It.

doubt thou the stars are fire;

doubt that the sun doth move;

doubt truth to be a liar;

but never doubt I commit to the fucking bit.

much to everyone’s surprise, it turns out that if you take the meds prescribed for your adhd, your adhd won’t be as bad which is a crazy concept I think

microsoft outlook is gonna make me commit a war crime and I cannot be held responsible for that

maybe not my best idea to use spicy ramen broth to swallow my adhd meds

I think it’s time to start squandering my youth

cleaning out the containers of paints lab students have mixed in the prop shop and so far my favorites are

-small bit of yellow lotta mold

-the color: huh?????

-hey why did someone put guacamole in here?? and why is it chunky????

-rust. not the color. the can is just full of rust

-raw egg. it is the consistency and colors of a raw egg. I would not be surprised to learn that that’s all this is. just a raw egg

-beautiful mint green feat. the look and smell of spoiled milk

-oops all mold!

-the venom symbiote?????

being the only person in my family who isn’t a big fan of baseball is incredibly annoying when they keep interrupting experiencing the Wonder of Nature™️ to yell about baseball

restaurant staff will laugh as they watch me struggle with the little toothpick machine but I look like a twelve year old boy so they think it’s endearing

it’s like a fun game to me to make overly specific posts about my life and my friends only for said friends to immediately hold up their phone to me with accusation in their eyes and the post on their screen or sometimes in fact loudly putting me on blast in the grad office during lunch break when everyone is in the room

the thing about macgyver is that he’s so full of t-boy swag