mybestmosquitofriend

Latest Posts by mybestmosquitofriend

from Simone’s instagram comments #crash4lottie

hey kids, what’s for dinner

my dealer: got some straight gas 🔥😛 this strain is called "macrodata refinement” 😳 you'll be zonked out of your gourd 💯

me: yeah whatever. i don’t feel shit

5 minutes later: dude i swear i saw some scary numbers back there

my buddy pacing the severed floor: mr. milchik is lying to us

x

i havent watched yellowjackets yet but im very intrigued by the fandoms ability to ship every single one of those girls with one another and also provide irrefutable evidence for each pairing. like im convinced by every single gifset. ill be damned if those two girls arent in love. which two girls am i talking about? doesnt matter. god bless

Elena Ferrante

i think about this more often than i should

Tiny kitty that can be made with 2 pipe cleaners. If you care. If you even care.

why does the dean 11x04 “im sitting in the drivers seat/dads sitting shotgun/but there arent any shotguns” monologue read like an actual poem. robbie thompsons mind

#they get it

and i WONT be attending book club next week so you can just FORGET it. wrinkle in time is SCARING ME and you guys just aren’t that sweet to me lately

yesterday i went to a party and i kissed this girl and she kept trying to give me her linkedin and i was like ...LINKEDIN? and she said yes linkedin. so i said i dont use linkedin. do you have instagram though. and she was like yes i do have instagram. you should add me on linkedin. and i said i dont use linkedin. and she said i will add you on linkedin. and i said girl give me your instagram you are NOT flirting with me through linkedin. and she was like. ok. fine. here's my instagram then. and gave me her instagram, which she clearly uses a lot, so it wasnt even that she only uses linkedin but rather that she just wanted to talk to me through linkedin specifically. fascinating woman if i wasnt already attracted to her her unwavering loyalty to linkedin wouldve drawn me in for sure

girlbestfriends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

cannot stop thinking about this skit from the new i think you should leave season

we asked girls what they think about since boys think about the roman empire, girl dinner, girl math, girl logic, let me explain world events to girls using shopping and boys as metaphors, not wearing makeup makes u a pick me, being butch somehow also makes u a pick me, so does being fat or ugly, hot girls read, hey if ur struggling financially or ur almost 18 and dont know what to do with ur life let me tell u how much money i made as a stripper doesnt that sound so much more fun than an office job, preventative botox, chemical peels that burn off the first three layers of ur skin, teen girls with 20 step skincare routines, a day in my life as a stay at home girlfriend, bimbocore, and this is all feminist actually do u want to kill urself yet

#jokes on you dana, he actually loves her

MYTHIC QUEST (2020-)

hello LGBTQLMNOP community

baristas deserve 100 dollars per hour

hey. don’t cry. crush two cloves of garlic into a pot with a dollop of olive oil and stir until golden then add one can of crushed tomatoes a bit of balsamic vinegar half a tablespoon of brown sugar half a cup of grated parmesan cheese and stir for a few minutes adding a handful of fresh spinach until wilted and mix in pasta of your choice ok?

Contender for my favorite tweet of all time

Me and my three best friends all converging in the same intersection at 60 miles per hour to play our favourite game car crash together