"I Want To Be A Healer, And Love All Things That Grow And Are Not Barren."

Me trying to write this sentence:

"Seeing the soldier’s clumsy sword work, Crowley realized that the Hibernian could have simply moved in and driven his saxe into the man’s body as he deflected the blade."

Google: no, not saxe, it has to be a saxophone

— Jonathan Safran Foer

D. H. Lawrence, from The Complete Novels and Writings of D. H. Lawrence

“Captain?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think it was destiny that brought us together?"

He squinted and, after a thoughtful moment, shook his head. "No. I'm pretty sure it was Cinder.”

a series of incorrect quotes based on personal interactions:

tennyson: don’t listen to anything this man says. half of what comes out of his mouth is lies!

halt: no

halt: more than half, i’d say

duncan: when halt began teaching crowley hibernian, i was convinced the two of them would use it to talk about me behind my back

*muffled hibernian bickering in the background*

duncan: as it turns out, they mostly use it to antagonize each other without my interference

halt: do we have to go to this funeral? i don’t even know this man!

pauline: he’s dead, if that helps, so you aren’t likely to meet him!

halt: it doesn’t help

will’s fortune cookie: your persistance will soon pay off

will:

will: I WANT A DOG I WANT A DOG I WANT A DOG I WANT A DOG I

crowley: i don’t see how anyone can drink their coffee with honey. it’s disgraceful

halt, behind him, pouring a copious amount of honey into his coffee: oh, yes — truly unthinkable

crowley: *writes “project” on a chalkboard* alright you motley lot, what should we name this project?

berrigan: operation oakleaf

farell: project coffee-beans

halt: mission ‘see-that-morgarath-never-shows-his—sorry-backside-outside-of-gorlan-again’

crowley:

crowley: *underlines “project”* we’ll think on it

will: *carefully places the final card on top of his card tower and sits back proudly*

pre-character development horace: *turns on fan*

I don't know why but I always imagine Caitlyn with brown hair as if everyone in her family has black hair and she's the only one with a lighter hair color

Seriously tempted to write a time-travel fic about Will meeting teenage Crown Prince Halt and royally screwing things up in the process. Someone slap me with a brick.

"There will come a poet, who's weapon is his word,"