Tumblr Is Full Of Phrases That We Are All So Desensitized To That They're Just Normal, But If You Say

*guy who is very clearly going through. something* oh yknow. just a little tired haha

Trans:

As the oldest of the Seven, the two’s relationship goes back several thousand years.

The first time the anemo archon visited Liyue, the Geo archon greeted him believing he was in need of his help. Yet the anemo archon was only there to drink with him.

Since then, the archons would gather to drink together. Now, all that remains is the two of them.

They call one another “the clueless bard that can’t read the wind” and “hard headed old man”, names perhaps they can only use because of how well they know each other

——————

zhongven shippers come get y’alls food

I headcanon that Lance says things like "holy crow" and "this castle has gone apples and bananas" because he's around children so much that he's had to overwrite any swear words in his vocabulary. I also feel like this is why he says quiznak more than the other paladins, it's another silly nonsense word he can use in place of swearing so it's more natural for him to incorporate it

Do u have any poly DoA headcanons you'd be willing to share with us plebeians? :3c

Do I have any poly doa headcanons I'd be willing to share????? You fucking bet I do~! Putting this under the cut because I got a little excited~

Nikolai is a classic blanket thief, but he doesn't steal the blankets for himself. He steals them for Fyodor, groggily making sure that Fedya is nice and tucked in so that he doesn't get cold during the night. This usually means that Sigma gets cold at night, and the only way to guarantee he'll get any sort of blanket coverage is to sleep in between Nikolai and Fyodor. Fyodor mentions that this arrangement was likely Nikolai's goal all along, but Nikolai refuses to comment on the matter.

Separately, all three of them are perfectly capable of cooking or baking without causing any sort of catastrophe. And together, Fyodor and Sigma work rather well together in the kitchen. The moment Nikolai enters the mix, all hell breaks loose. Not because Nikolai is bad at cooking. On the contrary, he's quite skilled in the kitchen, particularly at baking, but he can't resist causing problems when it's all three of them. After all, Fyodor and Sigma just look so cute when they're irritated at him, so how can he resist?

Nikolai never stops moving. He's always dancing or swaying or using his hands to fiddle with something. He's better at controlling himself when he's cuddling with Fyodor, who tends to prefer stillness when he's relaxing. With Sigma, Nikolai is always playing with his hands or pulling him into his lap or even braiding his hair. And when he is ready to settle down, it's that much easier to snuggle up with Fyodor once he already has Sigma in his clutches.

But when Nikolai's not in the mood to cuddle, Fyodor is quick to steal Sigma for his own gains. He's always cold, and Sigma's always hungry for affection. Even wrapped up in a blanket burrito, Fyodor is the most comfortable when he has Sigma close to steal his body heat to cozy up with <3

Sigma always keeps a small first-aid kit nearby. Nikolai tends to be destructive, both to himself and to their home, so he likes to be ready for whenever Nikolai inevitably hurts himself. He also keeps an eye on Fyodor, whose habit of biting through the skin of his fingers worries Sigma more than he would ever admit. Fyodor gets a little annoyed; why waste a band-aid when he'll likely need another one within the hour? But he finds Sigma's determination cute, so he lets himself be fussed over from time to time.

Sigma lived a sheltered, lonely childhood, so Nikolai makes it his goal to fill their daily lives with enough excitement to make up for it. This includes celebrating everything. He has a calendar, and it's difficult to find a week where every day isn't circled for one reason or another. From the smallest of anniversaries ("Look, Sigma! Six months ago today, you left the water running and flooded the kitchen!" "Why the hell are we celebrating that!?") to foreign holidays that they've never heard of ("Happy Fourth of July!" "Put the fireworks down, Kolya!"), Nikolai is determined to make a big deal out of it all. Sigma goes to Fyodor for help, expecting him to be the voice of reason capable of convincing Nikolai to stop. When he learns that Fyodor is the one providing Nikolai with the names of all of these random holidays, Sigma's not sure why anything surprises him anymore.

I should probably stop there before I end up rambling forever ^^; but thank you so much for asking!

Clockwork is doing his time ghost stuff in his lair when Batman suddenly appears, scaring the shit out of him.

Clockwork stared at a timeline, one in particular where his children workers were in a bit of a bind. He'd have to carefully warn Danny and watch over them a little more this week until this danger passed...

"Are you Clockwork?"

Clockwork did not flinch because that was impossible, even though his minute and hour hands spasmed from the shock.

He had foreseen this! How was he still surprised? And how on earth did a human sneak up on a ghost?

He turned. "Batman. I see you've found my lair. Did one of my... one of their highnesses show you the way?"

Batman tilted his head. He moved closer to him, his cape moving silently along with him.

Truly, Batman almost seemed more ghost than even him.

"Are you Clockwork?" He asked again.

Clockwork gave a nod. "That is I. What have you come here for?"

He knew what Batman was going to say or do.

Batman gave a curt shake of his head. "Nothing. I just wanted to confirm that I was given the right directions. Good day."

Clockwork watched him turn around and walk away, steps silent as ever. The very second he blinked, Batman was gone.

Clockwork stared at the spot where Batman had gone. He could still sense him in his lair, only faintly, but the quickness at which he acted was truly inhuman.

Clockwork clicked his tongue.

Why did his children employees befriend such strange individuals?

You were born of a sacrilegious union. Your green dragon mom never figured the knight she seduced while masquerading as a noblewoman was a silver dragon in disguise. You’d no idea either, born a human orphan. When your dragon blood awoke, so did the dangers which all your heritage entails.

Cutesy

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Hi chat hands you genshin textposts where it’s very obvious who my favorites are

obsessed with this frame from the scoob! movie

Tim: *idly* you know there’s a buzzfeed unsolved episode about you?

Jason: what’s buzfeed unsolved?

Steph: *chokes* there’s a WHAT