Latest Posts by onlycarrion - Page 6

ACC01 capsule collection @mercedesbenz_de - @actetm

Maggie Maurer by Elizaveta Porodina August 2022

i’ll never make a fandom post w/e but Morpheus’s son being Orpheus and Mortus’s son being Ortus has to be deliberate right

what, you didn’t offer her a hand?

is anyone else on this hill or is it just me and sisyphus and kate bush?

excerpt from ‘A Trans Body’s Path in Eight Folds’ from Pass with Care: Memoirs by Cooper Lee Bombardier (2020)

fyi the point of fucking up your data patterns isnt to avoid suspicion. it’s to make EVERYONE suspicious. same logic as the bloc, pals.  protect your comrades, be suspicious. ESPECIALLY if you aren’t doing anything likely to get you arrested.

@nagato_iwasaki 

To restate it–my general theory of history (ok, it’s more like my general hunch of history)–is that all apparent social progress is made as our civilization gets better at processing its trauma, bc cycles of violence/trauma/childrearing (and the normalization of these things) largely explain why the past so often seems so inhumanly violent to us–public executions, chattel slavery, massacres, etc, etc.

And there are people in this day and age who nonetheless glorify those days–the thing that got me reading acoup’s series on Sparta was his series on the Fremen Mirage, the illusion (delusion?) so often received in pop-history and in books like Starship Troopers that there’s this distinction between ““““decadent”““ non-militarized, peaceful societies and “morally pure” societies (militarily strong societies, i.e., societies that have value bc they are good at generating and exporting violence)

And–and I’m just spitballing here, I have very little evidence to back this up–I suspect that if you scratch contemporary subcultures where that kind of idolization of a militarized past occurs, where the atrocities–not even the atrocities in service of some cause, just the senseless, pointless, stupid violence–of societies like Rome and Sparta get brushed under the rug, you will find subcultures where people are much more traumatized than elsewhere by abusive, authoritarian, and outright violent upbringings, where the correlation of “authority figure” and “source of shame and pain” is much, much tighter.

Because if you are raised in, or still live in, a shitty, abusive environment, there are two ways you can deal with this: either you can say, this is awful, this is monstrous, no one should have to live like this (and if you do, so much the worse if the whole world is like that, or if it feels like the whole world is like that, because it is painful indeed to look at the world and think ‘oh my, it is full of pain and injustice and there is nothing I can do about it’), or “well, there’s a reason for all this misery.” The reason is ‘because it makes us stronger.’ Or the reason is ‘because it makes us more morally pure.’ Or the reason is ‘because God (or Lycurgus, or Odin, or the Emperor) commanded it.’ Sometimes–at least for some people–the worst possible outcome is that your suffering would have no meaning. It’s not just “well, I had to endure this, so why shouldn’t they?” Or rather, it is, but the core of that sentiment is, “how come I had to suffer?” and the desperate hope that, well, as long as other people are suffering, too, your suffering must have some kind of meaning. That’s Just The Way The World Is, After All. What’s the other possibility? You got fucked over, for no reason?

Sometimes when I’m reading about history, especially in its grimmer parts, I have this momentary feeling–not much more than a fleeting mental image, really. It’s an image of every human being since the dawn of time, as the tiny child we all once were at some stage, groping desperately in the dark for a way to understand the world we were dumped into. But we’re all, in one way or another, still one of those tiny children, with all that entails: a deep deficiency of understanding, a certain inescapable impatience and hotheadedness, cooperative creatures which nonetheless have a terrible fear of pain. In such a world, it feels like the only reasonable response is to try to cultivate a neverending source of compassion within oneself, to try to be as patient as possible with others, who are often just as alone and afraid as we are. After all, it’s what I hope they would do for me.

As Four - F/W 2002 Look Book. Known for their boldly capacious clothing, off-kilter runway presentations, and iconic “Circle Bag”, As Four’s radical design philosophy’s helped to earn them a strong following and reputation as one of New York’s most avant-garde fashion collectives.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CcwHR95hj4K/

@didu_official on Instagram

wild conjecture but i’ve been thinking about this post and whether, if as a basically-apocryphal little web search attests, cortisol levels begin to rise around 2-3am, this is why staying up that late feels so good, even or especially when there’s nothing on

i recall a piece of research about a possible use for an existing, relatively cheap and common drug that could be given in the immediate hour after a traumatic event (eg a car crash, a mass shooting) that would stop you developing PTSD; not just calm you down right now but prevent any long term effects from developing. you seem to have read a lot of papers, am I misremembering something or is that real. it wasn't in common usage, it was just a trial.

they were talking about hydrocortisone, the same stuff you put on itchy spots if you have a rash or something. hydrocortisone is the same thing as cortisol, which is known to the public as "the stress hormone". it's extremely good at suppressing inflammation.

before they started actually doing the research they assumed that PTSD patients would have higher cortisol in their systems than everyone else, but they found the exact opposite. PTSD patients are chronically low on cortisol, and increasing their circulating cortisol to normal levels makes them feel better. this may explain why PTSD patients seem to be "really good in emergencies", as the stress of the situation just brings them up to a normal cortisol level while everyone else is getting way too much, leading to panic.

at this point there have been tons of studies on cortisol in PTSD, including administration to crisis victims to prevent PTSD forming in the first place. use Sci-Hub to read full articles.

i got my hands on some hydrocortisone recently and can confirm it fixes an unbelievable number of chronic problems for me. however this is a drug with a very very high index of possible side effects and dosing is real tricky so i cannot recommend it as safe or easy for people to self-administer.

Sunlight entering the inner sanctuary of Amon-Ra in the Temple of King Ramses III (r. 1186-1155 BCE) in Karnak, Egypt

Alexander McQueen ‘The Overlook’ fall 1999

Paolina Russo FALL 2022

paolina russo fall 2022

Mystic church in Swiss

Inflatable Dress from MARRKNULL Spring 2022.

📸: MARRKNULL / ImaxTree.

Shannon Cartier Lucy (American, 1977) - Woman in the Woods (2019)

Upstate - Brendon Burton

元 Photo Louisa Meng

Yohji Yamamoto

Autumn/Winter 2006