Was Scrolling Through The Npdcultureis Blog Because Of The Post You Rebloged So Now I Have Some Question

i think my most narcissistic trait is the fact that i would be uncomfortable being friend with another person with NPD because i have to be The One And Only Narcissist™️

Part of my NPD is built on the "toughen up" unhealthy trauma coping mechanism - where the grandiosity is an attempt at convincing myself I'm over it and trauma hasn't affected me that much. I believe this contributes to the low empathy. Since I've basically told myself "suck it up" about severe childhood trauma, hearing someone else feeling distress about something elicit an automatic response of "Why are they so weak? I got over it, why can't they?"

(Disclaimer: The idea that I somehow "got over it" is in fact a fucking lie I tell myself and have repeatedly fallen for)

any other narcs get uncomfortable when you're the center of attention without trying. like if you want to be the center of attention its great but if it happens on accident you feel weird and bad and uncomfortable like you somehow manipulated the situation without trying

Maybe NPD Culture is seeing someone try to one-up other people and deciding to join in because you're the best at one-upping people.

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I relate.

this is some things i have to deal with, and i’m guessing i’m not the only one, so:

- even when you feel like a bad person, you’re probably not.

- putting yourself first is not selfish.

- having lower empathy doesn’t make you bad.

- not noticing when you hurt people until they tell you isn’t your fault, what matters is your actions after you’ve been told.

- not recognising yourself during episodes/crashes is normal, and even though it might be scary it’s okay.

- anger is a good emotion, it’s there for a reason. once again, your actions while angry are what matters.

- self-isolation can be good sometimes, mostly to avoid conflict or to avoid ruining relationships (for me).

- you deserve people in your life that understand you.

questioning npd culture is always blaming mistakes you do on trauma or neurodivergencey because it’s not my fault im like this

-🎒🌲

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(Source)

On February 8th, this nonbinary child was violently beaten by three cis girls. The school did not call them an ambulance after the beating was stopped, and they later died in the hospital from head trauma. They have also been deadnamed and misgendered in their obituary and in the news. As the author of the article puts it:

How is that not national news? A 16 year old beaten to death in a public school bathroom? By other students. All these unanswered seemingly obvious questions about what transpired, and how the adults involved acted. That should be every headline. In fact, almost every local outlet covering the story misgender and deadnames Nex, using their same assigned at birth. The indignities pile on. We don’t yet know if Nex’s nonbinary identity is directly tied to this incident. But, my God, it sure matters to me that this would happen to any child. A nonbinary kid assaulted in a girl’s bathroom. That outcome from the narrative of anti-trans rhetoric these past years. Still why wasn’t this story breaking news? It involves a nonbinary student in a public school. And school violence and school police resource officers. It involves the deep fear so many trans youth have shared with me about their schools.

narcissism/NPD recovery resources, because there’s like nothing good out there

Books and things to read:

Borderline, Narcissistic, and Schizoid Adaptations by Dr. Elinor Greenburg - Aimed at providers but apparently super great for self-help too

How Do You Develop Whole Object Relations as an Adult? by Dr. Elinor Greenburg - Tips on how to stop seeing yourself and other people as only either all-good or all-bad

10 Stages in the Treatment of Narcissistic Disorders by Dr. Elinor Greenburg - Goes through the stages of treating NPD

Rethinking Narcissism by Dr. Craig Malkin - A book about promoting healthy narcissism instead of unhealthy narcissism

Antisocial, Borderline, Narcissistic and Histrionic Workbook: Treatment Strategies for Cluster B Personality Disorders by Dr. Daniel Fox - what it says on the tin. May be best done guided by a therapist

Shame in patients with narcissistic personality disorder PDF - What it says on the tin.

Narcissus and the Daffodils - an essay about NPD by someone with NPD. Probably the best description I’ve ever seen

Things to watch and listen to:

Recovery FOR the Narcissist by Dr. Eric Perry - A compassionate podcast to provide insight, support, and encouragement to anyone who exhibits narcissistic tendencies. Very in-depth

Early Morning Barking - A YouTube channel by someone with BPD and NPD about coping with and educating people on BPD and NPD. He also has a Recovery from NPD by Dr. Todd Grande - A video about this provider’s experience with helping people recover from NPD

Misc:

Narcissism Self Help Therapy website - A daily program for people with NPD (may have some triggering aspects in Part 2 of the program)

NPD Safe carrd resources - More resources for NPD (I have not gone through all of these so I don’t know how good they are)

NPD Recovery Comics by The Ego System - A bunch of fantastic comics about recovering from NPD.

Most common responses I get when I post any sort of cluster B positivity:

An extensive trauma dump in an attempt to validate their hatred towards us.

"You sound like a narcissist"

"You're just trying to manipulate us but we won't fall for it"

"This is really invalidating to actual trauma survivors"

"This is why people don't like cluster B's"

"Part of supporting someone with a cluster B disorder is by not enabling their abusive behaviour"

"I'll only support cluster B's if they get help"

Assuming that my opinions are based on a lack of research.

A looooong response about how trauma survivors need to stick together that promptly gets deleted when they realise I myself have a cluster B disorder.

*Posts to r/fakedisordercringe*

Tries to justify the exclusion of an entire group of trauma survivors because "we need to keep ourselves safe from people like you"