What Did The Bishop Say When He Went To The Ball?

where’d he get a dyson airwrap in the 1400s…

when she says she doesn’t send nudes

remember in 2007 or 2008 when emo was at its peak and gay marriage wasn't legal and so we had boys in eyeliner and skirts making out with each other at the mall in protest. i think we need this again

Transmasc vampire but instead of blood he sucks out testosterone from men like they’re slushies

I'm not constantly sticking the needle on my fingers because I'm shit at sewing by hand. I'm microdosing stab wounds to develop an immunity to daggers.

imagine if doorways grew back like scabbed over with fresh drywall and you had to keep carving them back out with a jabsaw to keep the doorway clear etc

we've been doing this thing called "hitting the nosferatu" where you hunch your shoulders and walk towards things while pointing with a long creepy finger

my top hobbies are shame and embarrassment but i also occasionally dabble in envy

MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE IS BACK

Cinematic parallels