Test Cricket Really Is A Bunch Of White Men Occasionally Hitting A Red Ball And Occasionally Groaning

speaking of Ao3 not being a social medium:

it will always need money. It’s an archive. Even if they meet their yearly donation aim now without any problem doesn’t mean it will be like this in 5 years, in 10 years, in 80 years. Yeah you read that right. Ao3 is an Archive. It intends to be available forever. Like a library. Because Ao3 *is* a library. If you want to keep your library, you wouldn’t cut its budget just because it did well last year. Maintaining a library creates running expenses. The purpose of an archive is to preserve data indefinitely, and this costs money.

My emotions include:

• vibing

• not fucking vibing at ALL

Random convo I bet happen between civilians and vigilantes

Civilian: What hair product do you use man?? My man's hair is shiiiiining

Nightwing, chuckling: I just let it dry (lying)

Civilian: Naaaah, man I see you jumping from rooftop to rooftop everyday, tell me your secrets–

---

Gothamite: And who's gonna pay for this scratch on my car?!!!

Robin (Tim), trying damn hard to stay stealth: Don't you have insurance?

Gothamite, don't giving a fuck: No!

Robin: You should have–

Gothamite: You know what? HEY TWO-FACE–

Robin: No, no, no– Hold on–

Gothamite: HE'S RIGHT HE–

---

Gothamite: Okay- Cannabis is very much legal in L.A.

Batman: We're not in L.A.

Gothamite: Yeah that's funny because– *runs*

Batman: *Runs after him.*

---

Gothamite: See I don't hate you

Signal: Always good to hear that–

Gothamite: You doing a pretty good job.

Signal: I–

Gothamite, also a bus driver: But you gotta stop being thrown at my window–

Signal: I don't control where villains throw me.

Gothamite: Yeah bro– But you better start, otherwise there's gonna be one more out there–

---

Gothamite, also a security guard on his phone at 3 am: Yeah, no honey it's literally desert here–

Gothamite: HOLY SHIT

Batman:

Gothamite: Fucking warn a guy, mY GOD–

---

Gothamite: I thought you were taller.

Nightwing: I heard that a lot.

---

Gothamite: How do you see on that thing?

Batgirl (Cassandra):

Batgirl: I don't.

Gothamite, terrified: Oh okay–

---

Batman: Shouldn't you be at home?

Gothamite, who's also a teenager very much snicking out at four am: Shouldn't you mind you business?

Batman:

After being forcefully driven to home on the batmobile

Gothamite That was really unecessary–

---

Gothamite: Are you alone??? Where'd your dad? Where's Batman?

Robin (Tim Drake, early days): Batman's not my dad.

Gothamite:

Gothamite: See now I'm concerned.

Robin: Oh no–

Gothamite: What's is this a internship...? A job...?

Robin: You know what? Yeah, Pretty much.

Gothamite: Really? Oh okay, okay. I'm less concerned– Because–

Robin: Yeah I can see–

Gothamite: Like "is he kidnaping those children"?

Robin, chuckling: No, no–

Gothamite: You get paid?

Robin: Not really.

Gothamite: I'm back at being concerned–

---

Gothamite, from her window: Have you eaten yet?

Robin (Dick): No– (lying)

Gothamite: Oh, the poor child– Oh shame on you

Batman:

Gothamite: The poor kid– You're dragging him alone with you to fight crime on a empty stomach?

Batman:

Batman: I–

Gothamite: Unbelievable. I expected more on you– Hold on sweety I'll see If I have some cookies here to give you.

Dick: :)

---

Robin (Damian): Do I look like a fucking child?

Gothamite: Do you want me to answer that?

---

Old Gothamite being around the city since Batman year 1: You sound different.

Batman (Dick Grayson): No I don't.

Gothamite: Yes you do–

---

Gothamite: She looks different.

Gothamite: Mark is the same girl.

Gothamite: No honey, she looks different, she's was taller

Gothamite: Honey you're being paranoid.

Gothamite: She was a red-head!

Gothamite: Oh, Mark. Now the girl can't even dye her hair? Just because she's a Super-hero? Por girl can't even reinvent herself and people on this city start saying she's a different person?! Let her be! Her life must've be hard enough–

Gothamite: Jennet I swear to God that's not the same girl–

Batgirl (Stephanie), just trying to get some information:

Gothamite: You never notice when I change my hair–

no longer interested in the championship battle. the only battle in f1 that i’m interested in is the one between mclaren and ferrari: who can end the race weekend looking like bigger wankers

Phrases I bet were said on the batfamily patrols without context.

Tim in his comm: No. he's not dead- *casually checks Jason's pulse* yeah there's nothing to worry about.

--

Jason nudging a mugger with his feet: He'll live.

--

Dick: No one tells any of this to Batman

Batman, behind him: No one tells what to Batman

Dick:

--

Robin: You said Redhood should stop killing do I look like Redhood to you?

--

Jason: This * shows a pair off rubber bullets to the renchman * were not letal, now this * shows them a pair of real bullets* are.

*reloads*

Jason: Start running.

--

Dick at the comm: What do you mean next to the Batsburguer? I am literally-- Hood. Hood. Jason. sto- STOP SCREAMING AT ME- I am literally- SHUT UP! Jason- I swear to god, I will hang up on you... WE ARE LITERALLY IN FRONT OF THE BATSBURGUER,... What do you mean "what car" what do you think? We're... We're next to - sorry - Next to the old lady behind the drive thru... fuck sake You know what? Just send us your location- Just- Yeah...

Damian, looking at his phone with the location:..... Dumbass you're in the wrong Batsburguer.

--

The signal, making eye contact with the other batkids: I do not know them.

--

Damian Robin: What are you doing in here?

Tim in his civil clothes: Are you serious? This is literally my rooftop. I live in this house.

--

Literally everyone to Oracle: Do NOT call Batman

--

Oracle: I'm calling batman.

--

Batman, clearly lost, lying through his teeth while gripping the batmobile's steering wheel: This is my city, we do not need a map.

--

Jason: Oh my god, you two are such drama queens the kid just dislocated his arm. Hey. Hey Robin. Do that thing you did last time- He's going to be okay. Robin do that thing.

Dick: D-Robin do not-

Batman, at the same time: Robin do not

Damian currently running towards a wall to relocate his arm: *crack.* There. Let's go.

--

Steph: Technically he ran in front of my van so if we're being fair-

--

Robin squinting: ...Is that Harley Quinn in a Batman suit?

--

Harley: This is so unfair! Why he always send the interns to fight me!

Robin Damian, done with her shit: Maybe because you fight like a little boy

--

Spoiler: Yo mama

--

Nightwing: Let's do the flying Robin-

Robin Jason: What do you mean flying Robin? *Nightwing grabs him* WAIT. WAIT. WAIT. NIGHTWING- NIGHTWING YOU MOTHERF-

Nightwing: YEET

--

Redhood:

Nighwing: What?

Redhood: Let's do the flying Robin.

Nighwing: ⁿᵒ⁻

--

What pleases u in bed?

sleep

you can definitely spell FUN without whatever is going on here

Dick: I'm also bi

Alfred: I accept that, but you I will never accept you being a cop.

Made a comic based on this prompt:

https://tumblr.com/salemsvlog/730271411995918336/this-is-how-i-pictured-coach-meeting-eli-whe-he?source=share…

thanks so much @salemsvlog

thinking about batboys

of the eldest three, Dick and Tim are so much more likely to be evil than Jason actually is

Dick, in alternate stories and earths

- Renegade

- Talon

- Whatever the hell happened with the vampires jesus fuck dude

- Deathwing

- Talon again

Tim, in alternate timelines and stories

- Joker Junior (if it counts)

- Evil batman from an alternate future

- Evil batman from an alternate universe

- and i don’t think the 99 clones incident is very heroic tbh

like

Jason in most universes is either an antihero, a burnout, or a villain with a strict moral code

There’s worlds where

- he becomes batman

- he becomes red robin

- he trains his own robin

-he becomes a priest