Queste1 - 🦖🦕

op turned off reblogs but I want this forever

I am fascinated by this hypothetical person that got traumatized by senshi’s balls

Me: *looking at a porcelain hand in the home decor aisle of a store* if I lost my hands in some kind of tragic accident, I’d decorate my entire home with hand-shaped things. Then I’d invite guests over for like, dinner parties and such and sit there expectantly just basking in their discomfort.

My boyfriend: Do you hear what you say when you talk? Do you know what you just said to me?

i literally feel like im going to be sick trying not to laugh at this at my desk like i feel faint

Why is everything AI now I’m losing my mind

“Get his ass” Is so unreasonably funny to me. A huge win for the English language. Today’s version of “seize him” imo

they won't tell you this in therapy but sometimes the best way to stop catastrophizing/anxiety is to interrupt your spiraling with "girl what the hell are you talking about"

smoking cigarettes and drinking a six pack of these in the alley behind the pets store