Latest Posts by quetejuuu - Page 2

the lucky one (pt. 5) | jjk

summary: Growing up you only had one goal: beat Jeon Jungkook. Sometimes you'd win, other times you'd lose. Sometimes he'd lose, other times he'd win. But you'd both walk away from the match thinking the other was the lucky one.

pairing: jungkook x fem!reader rating/genre: 18+ Minors DNI | sports au, e2l/r2l, angst, fluff, smut word count: 27.7K chapter summary: You and Jungkook had always endured your lives, watching everyone else live theirs. It was time you helped each other learn how to finally breathe like real people. warnings/notes: typos probably, explicit language, jk and oc are the sun and moon 100%, hoseok i’m going to kiss you, karaoke..., yoonmin (i don’t ship them irl, don’t worry; all fictional and for plot purposes), panic attacks, poem referenced: mock orange by louise gluck a barbie dream house but all the dolls are kitchen knives by cassandra de alba, oc and jk are like so in love it’s not even funny anymore, oc in her mid-2521 na heedo era, she’s not doing too good, reporters are vultures, mention of king lear, i’m telling you they’re embarrassingly in love, unprotected soft sex like...soft-soft extra soft, mention of icarus/the fall of icarus, i think that’s it but if i missed anything please let me know, i hope you enjoy, my loves <3

chapter five: violet, roses are red, not blue ( ← previous | next → )  

FIVE WAYS YOU CAN Help Someone With an Anxiety Disorder:

Validate Their Feelings by Letting Them Know It’s Okay Not to Be Okay

Don’t Tell Them to Calm Down

Encourage Them to Focus on Things They Can Change

Help Them to Help Themselves

Discourage the Use of Alcohol or Drugs to Cope With Anxiety

OK . . .

You blinked once. Twice. Then once more, trying to make sense of the words before your eyes.

The thing was: you’d dealt with anxiety before. Hell, you’d been taking to biting your nails until they bled for a while now. You knew how it felt to peel over the edge of a toilet and empty your stomach’s contents just before a game. But . . . you never knew how to handle it or how to deal with it in such abundant measures.

Why were you looking into it now one may ask? Easy. You didn’t care much about how much you could endure, because truth be told: you knew you could handle it. You knew it would pass and while it sucked, you knew it was something you could deal with. And besides, you could deal with a lot, so . . . 

But . . . 

There were certain things that made sense to you. While you knew you could deal with everything on your plate . . . and while . . . while you knew Jungkook could handle himself . . . for some reason, you just didn’t want him to have to. 

It was an odd thing: realizing you’d rather deal with both your problems and his than let him suffer. You supposed that was what it meant to be friends, though . . . and well . . . you’d never really had any, so this was all new territory for you.

So ever since a few months ago when Jungkook told you about what happened to him just last year, you’d taken to the internet. You spent countless hours researching anxiety disorders, how to help, what to say, what to do, and on the off chance he had a panic attack near you, you’d taken to researching what to do then, too.

It made you feel a little stupid, yes, but you didn’t know how else to help. You didn’t want to make him feel . . . different for telling you, but you also . . . you didn’t want him to feel so alone anymore. (You’d even bought a book on it all (it only made you feel more clueless). 

Now . . . you didn’t know much, but you hoped the research would do something. And perhaps it wasn’t too far off either. After all, you’d been helping Jungkook stay away from booze as much as possible, even deciding to stay sober with him and you thought it was helping some. But you knew the late night talks were what helped more. You didn’t know how to say this without sounding full of yourself, but you liked to think you were helping him. 

That was what you truly wanted. To help him in ways you couldn’t help yourself. You could handle everything as long as he didn’t have to. That . . . that was what felt right to you.

So . . . five ways you can help someone with an anxiety disorder, you read again. You felt a little more than clueless. Still.

“Hey, Sunshine—“ Jungkook called for you, snapping you out of your own mind— “come look. It’s done.”

Blinking quickly, you clicked off your phone out of habit, realizing where you were. A tattoo parlor.

Yeah . . . 

It was the weekend of the final tournaments. The win or lose all, and Yunis was up there right next to the big leagues. How? All because of Jungkook. These past few months you and him had been unbeatable. Sure, you’d lost a few, but . . . more often than not, the two of you would end a match with grins on your faces moments before you jumped into his arms and just let yourself . . . celebrate with him.

That was how it had been. You and Jungkook against the world. And to be honest, you quite liked it that way. (Granted, after your little outburst, your teammates had stopped talking about Jungkook altogether and started to . . . almost but not really but also kind of . . . respect him more (except Wooshik, but whatever). That made things a whole lot better, but it was still just you and him and you were sure it would be for the rest of the season.)

Anyway . . . you were getting off-topic. 

The point was: it was almost the weekend of the final tournaments and Yunis was staying at some hotel somewhere in Ulsan. And well, while you and Jungkook were watching some movie in his hotel room, he got an idea. He wanted a new tattoo. For good luck, he’d claimed, and you . . . you hadn’t gotten a tattoo since that one mistake of one. But somehow, someway, Jungkook had managed to drag you out of the hotel and into the nearest tattoo shop he could find on the GPS. 

Which landed you there: sitting in the waiting area while Jungkook went first. (He wanted it to be a surprise. That was what he told you, which you thought was a little silly, but whatever.)

And then it would be your turn. 

Actually . . . 

You turned to face Jungkook, taking in the dopey grin he had spread across his face while he peeked at you through the door leading to the tattooing room. It was your turn.

“Hmm?” you hummed in questioning.

Jungkook shook his head. “Come look,” he repeated as he gestured for you to follow him. “And then I’ve got a couple ideas for yours. Don’t let me forget. And don’t pretend to forget. Got it?”

You rolled your eyes with a huff, but nevertheless, followed after him, shutting the door behind you. Out of the corner of your eye, you caught a glimpse of the artist, but, well, you had never been good at greeting people, so what should’ve been a small greeting wave, turned into you just staring at him with some kind of . . . smile on your face. And when you realized that was so not the way to go, you turned your attention back to Jungkook, grabbing onto the loop of his jeans as he led you to the mirror on the other side of the room.

Jungkook glanced to where you clung onto him, raising his brows as he looked between your face and your hand. “Good?”

You blinked. Then realized what you were doing. Then well . . . you cleared your throat and attempted to tear your hand from his body, but before you could, his fingers curled around your wrist. And without a second glance, Jungkook guided your hand back to him, allowing it to slip into his back pocket. 

All you could do was stare at the back of his head in shock. His dark hair was long now. Longer than it had ever been, to the point it could only be tied back with a hair tie or it’d be in his face all day, which was his go-to most days considering the days were long and hot. And somehow, he looked more like himself like that. He seemed to smile more, too, and you always managed to smile back even when you least expected it.

But you couldn’t help it. He was just . . . well . . .

(Sometimes he made you wonder if you should really find your friend this attractive but you ignored that most days.)

Whatever . . . the point was: you had trouble wrapping your head around his touch; around the fact that while he wasn’t exactly yours, he didn’t mind your hands on him at any time. No one had ever liked your touch this much. You had always been too cold; too harsh; too rough, but around him, you felt like your touch was almost . . . soft.

And that was what always shocked you.

“Are you drooling?” Jungkook asked, snapping you out of your own head.

Only then did you realize you had been staring at him for quite a while now, and well, he would always tease you about that. Because he was . . . Jungkook.

Your brows scrunched together. “What?”

But he didn’t bother to repeat his question. No, instead, he took his thumb and swiped at your bottom lip, inspecting it in thought. “Yep, just as I thought—“ he jutted his thumb toward you— “drool.”

Glaring, you stepped closer. “I don’t drool,” you nearly huffed.

“Mmm, that’s not what the evidence says.”

“It’s chapstick.”

“Really?”

“Really.” You glared a little harder. “Will you just show the tattoo?”

Jungkook only grinned.

And then, he turned his attention to his tattooed arm, slowly pulling up the sleeve of his shirt. Your eyes stayed trained on his arm the entire time, expecting some sort of skull or something stupid, but instead . . . no . . . as he pulled up his sleeve, he revealed a vine of some sort of blue flowers traveling from the empty space left on his lower forearm to his hand, covered by a saniderm wrap.

“What flower’s that?” you questioned, eyes still trained on the fresh tattoo as you carefully brought your hand to his arm. 

“Morning glories,” he hummed while he watched you slowly turn his arm to get the full view. “My mom says they’re a pain. They grow everywhere like weeds. Once you plant one, that’s it, she says. They grow like wildfire. A nuisance.” He laughed softly. “Figured it fit.”

“It’s pretty,” you murmured with a small smile. “Fits the rest.” You tilted your head to the side a little. “Kinda looks like the snake is wrapping around it.”

Jungkook nodded. “Cool, right?”

It was. It actually really was. 

“It’s nice,” you settled with instead, feigning disinterest. 

But Jungkook knew you well. “Admit it,” he pushed on, leaning toward you. “Admit you’re impressed.”

Nearly rolling your eyes, you finally huffed, “Yes, fine, it’s actually cool, Kook.”

“So I’ve impressed you?”

“Well, considering I thought you were going to get a dick, yes, I suppose I’m impressed,” you muttered with a small shrug. 

Jungkook snorted. “Well.”

Oh god. No, he didn’t.

Furrowing your brows, you pegged the question, “Please tell me you did not get a dick and balls tattooed on you.”

His face screwed up as he tilted his head to the side in thought.  “Well . . . “

“Kook.”

Pursing his lips into a cute pout, he offered you his other hand, showing off his fingers. And there on his ring finger was the number three, and on his middle was a sideways U. Meaning, yes, Jeon Jungkook did, in fact, get a small yet visible yet inconspicuous yet not that inconspicuous at all, penis tattooed on his fingers. And no, no, you were not surprised.

“Really?” you deadpanned.

Jungkook shrugged. “Whoops.”

“As long as you don’t think this is a matching tattoo kind of thing,” you started off with your finger pointing directly into his chest. “Because, I’m telling you right now, Jungkook, I am not getting a dick tattooed on my body.”

And Jungkook only snorted, shaking his head. “No, god, I’m stupid, not an idiot. I have my designs in my bag.”

Designs? Your brows twitched. He spent that much time on this? But—

But Jungkook was already one step ahead of you, walking from you toward where his bag lay on the ground beside the tattoo chair. He rummaged through its contents until he clasped his hand around a small sketchbook before he took it out and reapproached you, already flipping through it.

Flip, flip, flip . . . and flip, until . . . he paused on a page and slowly offered it toward you with an almost shy (?) look on his face. Jungkook, shy? You almost didn’t believe it, but still, you took the sketchbook from him without another word, letting your eyes take in the sketch before your eyes.

It was another flower. Well, a stem with a few flowers. Yellow this time. And a little different from Jungkook’s. Perhaps it was a little more peculiar. 

“It’s an evening primrose,” Jungkook began while your eyes stayed trained on the sketch, still analyzing it. “My mom used to have them in our garden back home. They, uh, only bloom at night. I remember every night we’d watch them. They’d do this little shake and—“ he laughed, softly at first, then a little louder— “my mom would say it was like they were yawning.”

You traced your fingertips over the sketch, remembering your own little memories of the silly flowers. That was why you remembered them. They were your mom’s favorite. She used to plant like five batches each spring and force you to come outside and watch them with her, and yes, you said force because you had always been a disagreeable child. But still, every night, you watched them.

“They’re my mom’s favorite,” you voiced aloud with a small smile playing on your lips.

“Yeah,” he hummed under his breath. “My mom said she gives her a bundle every year for her birthday.”

Glancing up, you nearly beamed. “Really?”

He nodded. “Really.”

“I guess they’d be proud of us, hmm?” you murmured, searching his face. When you realized what you’d said, you quickly cleared your throat. “For becoming chummy, you know?”

His brows twitched. “Yeah . . . I guess they would.”

A beat of silence.

Then . . . Jungkook cleared his throat, shaking his head of his thoughts as his eyes turned back to the sketch. “Anyway, uh, they remind me of home, so I thought maybe they’d do the same for you,” he allowed himself to say in a hushed tone. “But, I mean, there’s others. The drawing’s kinda shit, so—“

“I like it,” you cut him off as you held the sketchbook closer to you. “I’ll—“ you shrugged— “I’ll get it.”

Jungkook’s brows nearly shot up to his hairline. “Really?”

You only nodded. “Why not? It’s cool. It means something I think, so yeah, fuck it, I’ll get it. Besides—“ you flicked his nose— “the sketch is not half bad. You didn’t tell me you could draw.”

“That’s because I can’t.”

“Bullshit.”

“OK—“ he agreed with a shrug— “hand me the tattoo gun. I can give you a Jungkook original.”

Narrowing your eyes, you couldn’t help but purse your lips into an unamused grimace. “No, thanks, I’ll end up walking out with testicles drawn on my forehead,” you muttered with just a little bite in your words.

And that got him. Jungkook laughed, his eyes crinkling first before a grin broke out onto his face. All the while, he playfully ruffled your hair, gesturing for you to sit down in the chair a second later. And you let it happen, a small dopey smile on your face.

(And you almost realized that while Jungkook had been smiling more lately, you, too, had never smiled so much in your life. You supposed you had him to thank for that . . . 

Supposedly.)

It wasn’t your reflection which caught your attention in the mirror. No, rather, what your eyes had landed on was the fresh tattoo of an evening primrose placed in the center of your sternum. It was almost similar to Jungkook’s, yet different just like the two of you, and the funny thing about it was . . . it kept managing to bring a small, almost unnoticeable smile to your face. 

“What’s got you smiling?” you heard from behind you as Jungkook appeared in the doorway of the hotel room’s bathroom (completely shirtless, might you add).

“Oh, nothing—“ you shrugged as you reached for a comb (totally not just pretending to untangle the ends of your hair), while maintaining eye contact with him in the mirror— “just the fact you whined and whined about how much pain your arm was in for like, what? An hour after?” Turning slowly to face him, you puffed out your bottom lip into a pout. “Such a pussy.”

His brows raised—a look of challenge. “Yeah?”

A beat of silence.

Another shrug was your only response.

Jungkook fought off a grin, crossing his arms. “I’m a . . . pussy?” Pushing off the doorway, he took a step toward you, head cocked to the side slightly. “Hmm?”

Mirroring him, you crossed your arms over your chest. “That’s what I said.”

“Oh, is that what you said?” he mused, mocking your voice. 

And before you could even protest or drop your jaw in shock, he was in front of you. He caged you in, leaning his hands on the counter behind you. One more inch and his nose would be touching yours, but you didn’t dare close that gap.

“You’re such a child,” you hissed in a hushed tone as if his proximity had made the room that much smaller and you that much more exposed.

“Mmm, am I?” he mused, his eyes trailing over your features with such languid strokes, you wondered how you ever handled his gaze before.

You raised your head ever so slightly.

To which, obviously, Jungkook found amusing. With that small, toothy, almost endearing smile on his face, he closed the gap, his nose brushing yours. “Kiss me then,” he murmured, pressing closer, just enough to brush his lips against yours in a feathering touch.

And you began to wonder how on earth you ended up becoming putty in his hands. “What if I bite you instead?” you murmured, but despite your words, you leaned into his touch.

Resting his forehead against yours, he hummed, “Well, I wouldn’t be opposed to that either.”

You felt yourself grin. “Good.”

The only response you received was his lips pressing against yours. You leaned closer, pleasantly sighing into the kiss as a grin tipped onto his face. His hands tickled your sides, lightly dancing across your skin before settling on your rib cage just below the crescents of your breasts. 

(Perhaps you forgot to mention that you were entirely topless . . . 

What? It was uncomfortable with the fresh tattoo.

Whatever.)

And well honestly, you couldn’t resist not having him close. So what if it bothered your tattoo? He felt better than any pain relief. 

Quickly, you found yourself tangling your hands in his dark, grown-out hair as you pulled him close enough to have your bare chest pressed against his. It made you feel close . . . closer than you had ever felt with anyone . . . closer than you had ever let yourself. His grip tightened on you instantly, his hands squeezing your sides once more before he gently sucked your bottom lip under the grasp of his teeth.

It only deepened from there. You melted into him, allowing him to meld his tongue against yours. The act squeezed a soft sigh out of you, to which Jungkook couldn’t contain himself. He smiled widely against your lips, and then his arms were around your thighs, lifting you up onto the sink counter. And once you were supported by the countertop, he stepped in between your parted legs as his hands found your face, gently caressing your jaw while he all but sucked on your tongue like he had done so many times before.

“Stop trying to eat my face,” you chuckled against his lips, still kissing him back while your arms wrapped around his neck.

He shook his head, but the small grin you felt against your lips gave him away. “Stop turning me on then,” he murmured back. “It’s just not fair, Daisy baby.”

Daisy baby. That was a new one.

Your brows twitched without your permission as your eyes traced his features. More specifically, your gaze fixed on his lips, watching as he tongued his lip ring—a habit he had accumulated over the years you supposed. 

It made it harder to focus on anything except him. And for the second time that night, you wondered how on earth you ended up being at his mercy time and time again. 

It just felt so unlike you. So different. So new. So . . . unfamiliar. 

Did you like it? 

You questioned yourself over and over again these past months. It felt like something you shouldn’t be able to feel. Really . . . it just made you wonder and wonder and wonder.

Until . . . Yes, you decided. Oddly enough, yes, you did like it. You quite liked feeling like this.

But what exactly was this?

. . . Your eyes met his, and your gaze softened instantly. You had no idea what this was. No idea . . .

Jungkook caught onto the look which crossed your face and leaned forward, burying his face into the crook of your neck. “What’s got you lookin’ like that?” he sighed against your skin, pressing open-mouthed kisses anywhere he could.

And your eyes fluttered shut as you melted into his touch. “Nothing,” you hummed, angling your neck to give him more access to your body. “I just—“ 

But a knock at the door halted the words from leaving your tongue.

The two of you paused.

A beat of silence.

Another knock came.

Jungkook pulled back and your eyes met, confusion passing between the two of you. 

Who could be knocking at the door at this hour? Especially Jungkook’s? (Because, really, after the whole meltdown you had at dinner after the first tournament . . . everyone had steered clear of the two of you. So you wondered once more . . . who could be at the door?)

No words were exchanged between the two of you, Jungkook only took the step into the hall, and peered through the peephole on the door. You watched in silence as he stared a second too long, his posture stiff before he sighed and disappeared back into the room. And well, in utter confusion, you hopped down from the counter, following after him only to find he had put on a tee and grabbed another, moments before he handed that very shirt to you with a tight-lipped smile.

“Who is it?” you whispered, your voice hushed as you put on the shirt he’d handed you, covering your bare chest.

Jungkook tongued his inner cheek, but before you could even press the question, his face softened. A small, stiff smile met his lips as he reached out and caressed your chin with his pointer, while his thumb brushed your bottom lip. “Keep your claws in,” he murmured, that small smile still on his face as if he thought that alone would be enough to ease your wandering mind.

“What—“ 

But he was already gone. 

His touch left you and you watched as he approached the door, while you followed slowly behind. The door was swinging open the next second, revealing—

Oh. You blinked in shock.

In the doorway stood Hoseok, whose back was facing you at that very moment while he talked to . . . Seulki?

Huh?

Tilting your head in confusion, you caught Seulki’s wide dark eyes. Her eyes widened further at the sight of you two as she quickly smacked Hoseok’s shoulder and pointed behind him. The action caused Hoseok to immediately shut his mouth as he slowly turned around, his lips down-turned into an awkward expression as his gaze darted between you and Jungkook.

Furrowing your brows, you sent him a look. 

Hoseok blinked back in response. Seulki nervously waved before trying to pass it off as her attempting to scratch the back of her head. And Jungkook . . . well . . . he was the one to clear his throat, putting an end to the silence. (You, however, caught onto the fact that his eyes remained glued to his feet the entire time.)

That . . . that made you step forward, until you stood beside Jungkook, crossing your arms over your chest as you leaned against the door frame. “Something wrong?” you questioned the two of them, keeping a close eye.

Hoseok opened his mouth, hesitating slightly. “Uh—“

“We were looking for you guys,” Seulki cut in with a wide smile on her face. “So it’s good that you’re both—“ she glanced at Hoseok, starting to fidget with her hands as she cleared her throat— “here. Hoseok?”

Hoseok eyed her, a tad startled before he nodded in agreement. “Right, yeah,” he hummed with a clap of his hands. “We were gonna meet up with some friends from college in Busan for karaoke. They’re just . . . they’re coming to the final tournaments and we thought ‘why not, let’s go out’.” He laughed . . . awkwardly if you might add. “Anyway . . . We’ve got two extra train tickets. Could be yours . . . ?”

Quirking a brow, you glanced between them. “How much?”

A perplexed look crossed both their faces. But it was Seulki who spoke up first. “What?” she mumbled, slightly puffing out her bottom lip into a small pout—something she happened to do a lot that you’d caught onto. “Nothing. We just . . . “

As her words trailed off, Hoseok picked up where she left off. In fact, he took it a step further. “We . . . “ He quickly shut his mouth, shaking his head at his thoughts before he raised his head once more, eyes now locked on Jungkook rather than hiding from him. It didn’t matter if Jungkook didn’t look him in the eye, it seemed Hoseok had something to get off his chest as he took a literal instead of metaphorical step toward him. “I . . . I feel bad . . . for how we treated you. I assumed things. I never asked you. I never thought to. I should’ve gotten to know you before listening to anything Wooshik had to say. I misjudged you. For that, and everything else . . . I’m—“ he touched a hand to his chest before he gestured toward Seulki— “we are sorry.”

And while his words lingered in the air, you hadn’t realized that the stiffness in your muscles had slowly loosened and your gaze was now set solely on Jungkook. How could it not be? 

With a careful glance, you took in Jungkook’s demeanor. It was clear he, too, was taking in Hoseok’s words. His head was still lowered, his eyes trained on his feet, but they kept moving in rapid motions as if he were fighting with himself to not look up. And all you could think was: look up . . . please, please look up.

You hadn’t expected it when you first saw them in the doorway, but you weren’t an idiot. Hoseok and Seulki had come here to make amends. They had come here to admit their wrongs. You couldn’t be angry with that . . . not when you had seen just how happy Jungkook had been the first time he’d been able to . . . see someone.

If he looked up . . . then that would mean he would be OK. If he looked up . . . then maybe he could breathe a little easier. And truly . . . as odd as it sounded . . . all you wanted was for him to be . . . happy.

If Jungkook looked up . . . all of that could be possible.

“Look—“ Hoseok began again, nearly reaching out to pat Jungkook on the shoulder, but he stopped himself before he made contact— “Uh . . . you don’t seem like a bad guy . . . so I was wondering if we could all hang out like teams are supposed to, you know? Not just to apologize . . . but to . . . be friends, I suppose, is what I mean . . . “

You swallowed hard, fighting with yourself not to speak for him. Look up, Jungkook, you repeated over and over again in your head, watching him with careful eyes. Look up. Please . . . please . . .

Another beat of silence, more painful than the last.

Then . . . 

. . . Jungkook raised his head, and his eyes met Hoseok’s, and you knew what his answer would be.

In no way, shape, or form could you comprehend how you managed to make it to some random karaoke bar in the middle of Busan around, like, two in the morning. Hell, you didn’t even remember hopping onto the midnight train to get to the city in the first place, but there you were, dressed in whatever the fuck you could find in your suitcase that wasn’t a badminton uniform, and you were sitting next to one of Hoseok’s friends (Namjoon, you thought his name was.)

And while Namjoon managed to impress you with his choice in cologne, he had been talking your ear off for the past half hour and you couldn’t think straight for the entirety of the time he’d been telling you about well . . . you honestly had no idea what he was talking about. In truth, you couldn’t really hear much . . . because your mind was elsewhere. Because, because, because for the last half hour that Namjoon had been at your side, your eyes had been on Jungkook.

Now . . . you knew how that sounded, but you had a reason. You see, Jungkook wasn’t alone either. He had been sat next to another one of Hoseok’s friends (let’s call him Yoongi and hope you got that right) . . . and he was like . . . looking at him. No, no, like . . . he was looking him in the eyes . . . that is why you couldn’t stop staring, couldn’t stop trying to eavesdrop, couldn’t stop just . . . just . . . just whatever!

Was it embarrassing to say you were proud of him?

But . . . you were . . .

As much as you hadn’t wanted to admit it, he’d become the only person you’d ever been this close to in your life. He’d once told you you were the only one he could see . . . the only one he wasn’t afraid of to look in the eyes, and now . . . in just a few hours, he’d allowed himself to hear people, see them, interact with them beyond the restrictions he’d put on himself the entirety of his contract with Yunis.

And the little thing that made you feel all that more warm, was the attentive, genuine smile on his face as he nodded along to whatever Yoongi was saying. That . . . that made a smile of your own touch your lips as you took in the scene.

“You agree?” you heard from beside you, Namjoon’s voice startling only slightly enough to have you abruptly whipping your head in his direction with a confused expression on your face.

You blinked, furrowing your brows. “Hmm?” you hummed in a questioning tone as you snuck a glance back at Jungkook, only to find . . . oh . . . only to find him lazily shifting his gaze from Yoongi to you with an amused smirk on his face. (Great, so he had seen you looking at him. Great. That he’ll really get you later on with.) “Do I agree—what?”

Slowly, you forced yourself to tear your eyes from Jungkook and finally face Namjoon, who seemed to be oblivious to everything else. You weren’t even really sure if he had heard your question or if he were too busy inside his own head, questioning himself. But it didn’t matter either way, because . . . the music cut out, Hoseok and Seulki’s voices died down, followed by their out of breath laughter, and then:

“Alright, who’s next?” Hoseok called out, offering up the microphone.

Immediately, Yoongi shook his head, leaning back to indulge in his drink rather than the question at hand. And no one else could get another word in before, Seulki and Hoseok had caught onto this little act, only they didn’t exactly . . . go for him. No, rather, Seulki, specifically, all but jumped toward Jungkook. “I vote Jungkookie goes!” she declared as she leaned forward to dangle the microphone in front of his face.

“Agreed! Jungkook-ah, onstage now!” Hoseok exclaimed, closing the distance to Jungkook before he wrapped a hand around his arm, urging him to stand to his feet and take over the spotlight. 

(Clearly . . . something you hadn’t mentioned . . . everyone but you and Jungkook were . . . perhaps maybe a little bit or a lot or yeah, yeah, yeah . . . they were drunk. (So you could see how . . . this had happened.))

And Jungkook all but turned cherry-cheeked. “No, no, I can’t,” he laughed it off, trying to wave them away. “I’m a horrible singer, really.”

Lie.

He once sang for your elementary school’s talent show . . . you know . . .

But the others persisted, whining and whining and blah blah blah—

. . . Five minutes later, no doubt, Jungkook finally gave in with a playful groan. He took the microphone from Seulki, slowly making his way to the center of the room you guys had booked, and then you noticed something . . . his eyes had only been on you the entire time. And suddenly, you began to wonder what that meant, wrapping your arms around yourself as your brows raised in question.

Until:

“Listen,” Jungkook began, a half-grin sliding onto his face as he maintained eye-contact with you, “I’ll sing . . . but I need my sidekick.”

Raising your brows, you knew you’d kill him for that later. But still you didn’t move. All you could do was shake your head, because no, no, no you did not want to sing in front of anyone. 

“OK. OK,” Jungkook nodded slowly to himself, but you knew him better than that. He had something planned. And you could just tell by the way he began to walk toward the system in order to plug in the song that was somehow someway on his mind. Then, he turned back around, both microphones in his hands, his eyes solely on you with a mischievous glint in them as the first seconds of the song began to blast through the speakers.

Squinting your eyes in skepticism, you watched him. 

He only sent you a knowing grin.

And you suddenly had a feeling you knew exactly what he had put on.

“ . . . She ain’t got no money,” Jungkook began, trying his best to sing, but his grin kept growing and growing just as your face fell and fell and fell. “Her clothes are kind of funny. Her hair is kinda wild and free. Oh, but—”

You nearly smacked a hand to your face.

“—Love grows where my Rosemary goes,” he continued, beginning to bob his head now to the music. “And nobody knows but me.” Clearing his throat over the music, you knew you were in for it. “Come on, Rosemary, on your feet. Let’s go. Let’s go. Let’s go, because! Love grows where my Rosemary goes! And nobody knows like—Come on!—me!”

And finally . . . finally after being hounded and hounded, you unstuck yourself from your seat, your eyes solely on him as if it were just the two of you against everything, and then you took the microphone from his hand, and you knew you’d sealed your fate. Shaking your head at him, you playfully rolled your eyes moments before you glanced at the screen, checking where you were in the song.

Great, you thought. Fuck . . . OK. Clearing your throat again, this was your Hell. “I’m a lucky fella,” you began, your voice nearly tone-deaf, and certainly agony to the ears. “And I’ve just got to tell her that I love her endlessly.”

“Oh, because!” Jungkook jumped in, bumping you with his elbow. “Love grows where my Rosemary goes, and nobody knows like me!”

Snorting once, you continued for him, “There's something about her hand holding mine. It's a feeling that's fine,” you hummed along, realizing that perhaps . . . this . . . was . . . fun. And slowly, so slowly, you didn’t even realize you were doing it . . . you had begun to dance along, following Jungkook’s lead. “And I just gotta say—”

“Hey! She’s really got a magical spell and it's working so well that I can't get away,” he drawled out, perhaps carrying out his words a tad too much, but there was something about the smile on his face while he did it that you didn’t care. 

That was when you really lost it. Perhaps lost it was the wrong word, but that was when you really stopped caring if there were other people in the room, about keeping up your image or whatever. It just felt like it was you and Jungkook and the music.

And before you knew it, the song had ended, cheers came from Hoseok’s friends, but your eyes were solely on Jungkook. They had never really left him, because this was the song you’d sang at the talent show in elementary. It was also the song you had been too afraid to sing alone . . . because you were perhaps maybe not a shy child, but an antisocial one. And Jungkook . . . Jungkook had offered to sing with you. He’d never wanted to be in the talent show, but you . . . you always wanted the spotlight, and so, it was because of him that you were able to have it that day. Otherwise you probably would’ve spent the entire night crying in the school’s bathroom because you couldn’t force yourself on stage. And he . . . he had saved you back then. 

It seemed he always was . . . 

That made a smile slowly grow on your face, but before it could form into a toothy grin, cheers erupted throughout the room. Eyes widening, you glanced toward the noise, realizing it was not just the two of you but rather the two of you and . . . them.

But this them didn’t feel malicious as it had in the past. No, in fact, before you could even blink, Seulki was already jumping toward you, jumping up and down while she beamed about how that had to be one of her all time favorite songs. And Jungkook . . . well . . . Hoseok had reached him in seconds, clasping a hand on his shoulder as he went on and on about how he had no idea he had such a voice, asking if he’s taken lessons, and blah blah blah . . . all the while everyone else shouted requests at the two of you, hooting for an encore.

It . . . well . . . to say the least, it managed to bring that smile back onto your face, and finally you let yourself look away from Jungkook, knowing you could trust the others with him, and suddenly all you could see was Seulki. You’d never had many friends. Perhaps competition or surface people, but a little part of you saw Yurim, your college doubles partner and probably the closest you’d ever had to a friend, in Seulki. 

Except unlike all those years ago . . . this time you embraced Seulki with a hand on her shoulder and a warm smile touching your face as you finally let yourself tell her the little story of how the song came to be for you. Now, yes, she was drunk out of her mind and would probably forget about all of this tomorrow, but you didn’t care. 

It felt . . . nice . . . to talk to people like . . . this. And—And this feeling when you did . . . Oh what was that feeling called? Like, like warmth but better, perhaps innocent? 

Were you . . . happy?

And then . . . you began to wonder . . . was this what it felt like to have . . . friends? Were you allowed to feel like this? Like . . . like you were happy?

In that moment, you glanced back at Jungkook for a brief second just as he did the same. Your eyes met, and you knew he felt the same. And then: relief, relief, relief . . . 

A beat of silence. 

In it more relief. 

Beat.

Beat.

Beat . . .

But . . . like all things . . . balance. A knock on the door ripped that blissful beat of relief from your grasp. Brows furrowing, you slowly turned to see a blurry shadow just behind the door, indicating that someone was . . . asking for permission to come in? But . . . who? As far as you knew everyone who was there was supposed to be there.

You wondered and wondered, trying to tilt your head to see if you could make it out. And then you heard them call his name, but you didn’t believe it at first. You didn’t quite hear it. Seulki was jumping beside you, and you could have sworn you heard Yoongi announce that it was probably his partner at the door.

And then as Yoongi slowly walked toward the door, opening it to greet the man with this adoring look in his eyes, your heart plummeted to your stomach. Instantly, your eyes snapped to Jungkook, and you saw the entire world crumble before you. You tried to reach him but Seulki was still holding onto you, and you couldn’t breathe, you couldn’t speak, you couldn’t move, you couldn’t do anything but stare and watch as the world fell and fell and fell, leaving you with no way to put it back together.

Amongst the chaos, your eyes fluttered back toward the door and you heard his name once more. Jimin, you could have sworn Hoseok had called out, and you knew this was reality. 

Like an old ghost, Jimin had appeared at the door, almost unrecognizable from the boy you remembered in college. His hair now honey blonde, his cheeks full and almost rosy, with this way about him that just screamed he was different now. It made you wonder how different he was now than a year ago when Jungkook left his past behind him. 

Breathing carefully, everyone’s attention was on Jimin, but you caught sight of it first. Jimin’s eyes scanned the room and then . . . then they met yours. Your heart stopped again and you could have sworn his mirrored yours. His eyes widened only slightly, until they shifted just to the right of you, and you watched in silence as his lips parted, his brows twitching upward.

That was weird.

You would have expected him to meet the sight of Jungkook with anger . . . but the only expression on Jimin’s face was that of pain . . . perhaps . . . yearning . . . ? For something . . . ?

And finally, you allowed yourself to glance back at Jungkook, and you began to wonder if it truly were possible to die of a broken heart.

Jungkook stood stagnant, unmoving without even a single rise and fall of his chest. No, instead, his hand was clasped over his chest as if he were in physical pain, but he still didn’t move. Until he did.

Before you could reach him, Jungkook was off. He made a B-line for the door, pushing past everyone while they were distracted by Jimin’s appearance.

And you were a step behind him.

“Kook, where you going?” you briefly heard Hoseok call to Jungkook. “Jimin’s got to show you his vocals, man. He’ll give you a run for your money.”

But Jungkook wasn’t reachable. “I—um—restroom,” he barely strained out and then he was gone, slipping out the door and out of your sight.

You tried to keep up, desperately pushing past the others as you reached the door as well, but a hand on your upper arm stopped you in your tracks. Your eyes flicked from the hand on your arm to the face of the person it belonged to. 

Jimin . . . he was the one who had stopped you. Of course.

But you had never been easily swayed. You quickly ripped your arm out of his grasp, and left without a look back. But it was no use. The hallway was empty. Jungkook was gone.

So what? You’d find him. You had to.

Without another thought, you didn’t even wait to hear the door close behind you as you began to stalk down the hall, but a voice called out to you. 

“Hey, hey, wait,” the voice pleaded.

But you knew this voice well. You knew Jimin well, and you didn’t care what he had to say, not when Jungkook was missing.

Attempting to make another run for it, you put one foot in front of the other, only to be pulled back. Jimin wrapped a hand around your upper arm, pulling you into him and turning you to face him all at once. And you saw that hurt expression once again, but you didn’t care, you didn’t care, you didn’t care! Jungkook was out there and he was alone and you needed him to know you were never leaving his side again.

So fuck it, fuck it, fuck it. You didn’t care!

Desperately, you tried to peel his hand from your arm, but his words halted you in your tracks.

“Is he OK?” Jimin quietly asked, his voice barely above a whisper, almost as if he were ashamed of his own words. 

Taking a step back, you could only shake your head at him. “Are you fucking serious?” you all but hissed, the words burning on your tongue as you finally ripped your arm out of his grasp. “Now you care? Now you want to act like—“ Your words were ripped from your lips, unable to finish the sentence. Instead, another shake of your head came. “You’re fucking unbelievable . . . Of course he’s not OK. He hasn’t been for a while, and you would know that if you hadn’t—“ 

The words died on your tongue, and Jimin watched. While your eyes betrayed you, watering slightly, Jimin looked as if he couldn’t believe his own eyes. His gaze darted across your face, his brows raised in concern (?) while he watched as you fought against the floodgates, trying to bite back the tears in your eyes and the lump in your throat. 

And finally, you were able to force out the words: “He’s not OK. He’s really—“ you quickly exhaled— “really not.”

A beat of silence.

You swallowed that lump in your throat while a look of realization crossed Jimin’s face. It was funny . . . he looked completely different now than he did years ago . . . or maybe it was the look he wore. It was something you had never seen on him before. 

But you really didn’t care.

Sucking in a breath, you cleared your throat and began to back away. “And he needs me so I have to—“

But Jimin cut you off. “So he told you?” he asked almost a little too hesitantly as he took a step toward you.

Nodding, you swallowed hard. “Yes.”

His brows raised. “You guys are . . . good?”

“Yes,” you muttered, nodding again. “He’s—We’re friends.”

Jimin blinked. “Oh.”

“What?”

“I just . . . I didn’t see that coming . . . “

“Well—“ you bit your inner cheek— “it did.”

Another beat of silence.

Then: Jimin took a step back. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled, almost too under his breath to even hear. “I didn’t expect that he’d be here. I haven’t seen him in . . .  in a year. I didn’t even think he was . . . I didn’t think he was like that.”

Oh . . .

Don’t say it.

Don’t say—

Don’t—

But you couldn’t help but bite out, “No thanks to you.”

Jimin pinched his brows together. “What? What do you mean?”

You just had to say it . . . 

“Nothing—“ clearing your throat, you realized just where your loud mouth had landed you— “just . . . I have to go, alright?”

With one final look at the man before you—a man you once knew that now barely resembled the one you’d known—you walked past him, eyes trained solely on what was before you. Jungkook was the only thing on your mind. Finding him was the only thing you cared about. Leaving the past behind was easy when you knew he was waiting for you somewhere up ahead.

But a hand wrapped around your forearm, halting you in your tracks. Your eyes widened as you heard Jimin speak, but you couldn’t quite make out what he was saying until you glanced over your shoulder, your eyes meeting his words head-on.

“Look . . . look, I know,” he had said, an almost desperate expression plaguing his face. He swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing slightly before he sucked in a sharp breath. “I know. Trust me. I do.” Exhale.

Slowly, your brows scrunched together as you pried his hand off your arm. “Know what?” you questioned, your voice a slightly accusatory tone while you cocked your head to the side, eyeing him with skepticism. 

A moment’s silence passed before he searched your eyes. What he was searching for, you couldn’t quite make out, but he kept searching and searching and searching until his brows twitched upward, an almost pained expression fueling his face. And then: “I know it wasn’t Kook’s fault,” he confessed, his voice soft and quiet as if he were ashamed of his own words. “What happened between him and Tae. I knew it wasn’t his fault.”

Instantly, your heart dropped. 

He knew. He knew and he still let this happen.

You wanted to scream. At him. At everything. At nothing. 

But you stayed frozen, your mind spiraling and spiraling.

“I tried to get them to see that, too, but . . . Kook had always been our glue, not me,” he nearly whispered, harshly pointing at his chest almost as if he were trying to punish or rather condemn himself. “Tae and I would get into arguments over stupid shit all the time, and Kook would always be there to get us to see eye-to-eye. I didn’t know how to help them. I’m not good at that; he was.”

And then you saw it: you saw the past in his eyes. Slowly, it unraveled, and you watched as the three of them practiced day in and day out while you glared at them across the field back in college. You remembered being angry, but you hadn’t known why, and now . . . now you realized you had been envious of the fact that they were . . . friends. While you had none, they had each other. 

To see the three of them in completely separate places now . . . made your head spin and spin and spin. Never once did you think they’d do anything without each other, and now . . . now you were watching the past crumble through Jimin’s sad eyes.

It was almost as if you could see the moment they went their separate ways. Kook alone. Jimin and Taehyung together . . . but . . . distant . . . 

The distance was clear on Jimin’s face, and when he spoke, he spoke with a certain type of nostalgia that you knew all too well. “I knew what I had to do,” he continued, those sad eyes of his not leaving yours. “I chose Tae. I would’ve chosen them both, but I couldn’t . . . so I stayed by Tae’s side. I knew how they both felt. I knew that I could play neutral all I wanted, but Kook was gonna leave and I had to either go with him or stay with Tae.” He shook his head as he chewed on his inner cheek. “And I couldn’t let Tae go through this alone . . . and—and there wasn’t enough time to fix what happened between them, but I thought Kook would be OK. I would’ve fought harder if I knew—”

His words cut off, getting tangled around his tongue as the lump in his throat rose higher and higher. There was no way to tell when it’d finally choke him. What would happen then?

“He was just always so . . . fine,” Jimin whispered more to himself than to you, shrugging his shoulders as if he couldn’t believe it. “I thought he’d be OK. I thought he’d ignore all of this and win that medal we all dreamed of . . . but then he left the team and Wooshik . . he told me where he ended up.” He shook his head once more, his eyes now trained on the wall behind you, tears still glossing over and threatening to spill. “I didn’t think he was . . . struggling. I just thought he was hiding. I didn’t realize he was . . . “

“Well . . . I guess we all have our own ways of dealing with . . . guilt,” you heard yourself spit out before you could stop the words from flowing. You didn’t know why, you just . . . you just . . . you were just so angry. But at him? That you weren’t sure or.

It seemed Jimin was as shocked by your words as you were. His eyes met yours once again, blinking quickly, causing a few tears to slip down his cheeks. He quickly wiped them away, shaking his head in the process. “Don’t do this,” he muttered under his breath.

But you almost couldn’t control it. You were more parts anger than anything else, and there he was, the perfect subject to take it out on. Putting up a fight was useless, your mind was on autopilot. “Tae’s at home bedridden I assume and you’re here? On a date?” you hissed out through gritted teeth. “Mmm, I don’t know . . . sounds—”

“Don’t,” Jimin quickly cut you off, mirroring your anger. “You of all people don’t get to judge me.”

You raised your brows. “Why not?”

“You—“ he shoved an accusatory finger your way— “left him too once.”

And just like that, his words pierced your chest, making the anger spread into your bloodstream. “That’s different,” you bit out, eyes now shamefully trained on the ground.

“Is it?”

Scoffing, you shook your head. “Don’t turn this around. You—”

But Jimin wasn’t having it. “He loved you, you know?” he spat like the words had burned his throat.

The world stopped.

A beat of silence. 

Two beats.

Another.

. . . You could have sworn your heart thud in your chest. But . . . but that could’ve been your breath catching in your throat. 

And then you heard it: your own shocked voice. “What?” you all but gasped out, taking a subconscious step back.

Jimin furrowed his brows as if . . . confused (?) by your reaction. “He loved you,” he went on, keeping a watchful eye on your face. “I don’t know why or how considering you were such a horrible person the entirety of college . . . but he stuck by you. I’ve never seen anyone love somebody that much. Hell, I didn’t think it was real, and I couldn’t understand why . . . but he loved you, and when you pulled that shit on him; when you left, me and Tae saw it. He didn’t talk to anyone for months.” 

He loved you? He . . .

“He slowly came back, and a year later I thought he was fine. I thought he was finally over you, but . . . “ Jimin wet his lips— “I guess some old habits never die.”

Jungkook loved . . . you? In college he—But, no! He thought you guys had been friends. You were the one who had hated him, and he had thought of you as a friend. There was no love there. No, no there couldn’t be. He did not love you. He couldn’t have. No. No . . . No!

“And now you’re here . . . defending him . . . and I just can’t wrap my head around it,” Jimin finished off, his words more stable now. Then, slowly but surely, he nodded as if he had made peace with his thoughts. “But I get it. We all make our own choices. You made yours, but you . . . you don’t get to stand here now after everything and judge me when you left him in the dark for years. I made my choices, and I regret them most days, but it is what it is. You of all people should know that.”

But if he had loved you, then . . . had you broken his heart? 

You knew you’d done quite a lot of damage on him, but you hadn’t considered that you’d broken . . . the very thing you’d come to grow so fond of. Because truly, over the past months, you’d come to know him more than you knew yourself, and you realized he’d always had this softness about him. He’d always had a good heart. That was what you had come to admire most about him. And if Jimin was right, that meant you had hurt that very part of him.

If he was telling the truth, you had done so much more damage to Jungkook than you had thought. Perhaps it had been you who had ruined him.

That . . . that made your rage boil. “I do,” you ended up biting out, your voice harsher than it had ever been as your rage boiled and boiled, nearly bubbling and spilling everywhere. “I regret every mistake I’ve ever made and I know hurting him is at the top of the list, but you knew that, too, and you still repeated what I did wrong. Why didn’t you go back for him? Why didn’t you, I don’t fucking know, try?! Why didn’t you fucking try?! Huh?!”

Those words left your lips and before you knew it, you were face to face with Jimin, not even two inches apart. Your breathing was ragged and you could feel your rage burning through your bloodstream, turning it to rot, surely burning through your skin. 

Had it reached your heart?

“Why didn’t you try?” Jimin mumbled, the anger gone from his eyes as he took in your expression. And his words . . . this wasn’t a question. He wasn’t asking why you hadn’t tried to help Jungkook back then, no . . . he was reminding you that you hadn’t tried for a reason. 

Admit it or not, you hadn’t let him in because you hated yourself. And making yourself hate him, blame him, was easier than admitting you didn’t want to live with the person you had become. 

That was why you hadn’t tried—you were exhausted with yourself, with everything. 

And only then did it hit you. As those final words left your lips, you realized why you were so fueled with anger. You realized why you had chosen Jimin as your punching bag, and you realized what you had done. 

Because, really, you weren’t angry with him. No, you were angry with yourself. It was like he had said . . . you had left Jungkook once, too. 

Looking at Jimin was like looking in the mirror. What he had done to Jungkook was nothing close to what you had done to him. So being angry at him . . . hurting him was an excuse to ignore who you were really angry with: . . . yourself.

And finally, Jimin spoke for the both of you. “Because . . . I was exhausted,” he mumbled through a heavy exhale. “You don’t get it . . . I’ve stayed by Tae’s side for a year, and I’d do it again and again, but that doesn’t mean that there isn’t a part of me that doesn’t blame him, too.”

Wetting your lips, you took a step back, your anger slowly turning to guilt. This wasn’t his fault. Why did you blow up on him like that? Fuck.

Hating him wouldn’t make you hate yourself less . . .

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

“After the incident, it was like he just disappeared,” Jimin went on, his voice equal parts solemn and guilty. “Badminton was his dream. I think Tae loved it the most out of all of us, and just like that, it was gone. And without it, he just faded away. I don’t even think he blames Kook. He’s just . . . gone. It’s like he’s been on autopilot for the better half of a year.”

Fuck. Jimin wasn’t to blame. Just like Jungkook, this entire situation was just one big mess. No one was to blame. Fuck, no one was to blame, and yet . . . you were sure they all blamed themselves. 

How could you have been so blinded by rage you hadn’t noticed this before?

“And I . . . I have had to live for the both of us,” he confessed, finally raising his head to meet your watchful gaze. “I knew what I was getting into, and I did it because I care for him, but I didn’t realize . . . I didn’t realize that . . . you can be there for someone as much as you want but there comes a time when caring for someone makes you stop caring about yourself.” His brows twitched only once, but the action carried a world of pain. “Tae is my best friend. They both were, and I . . . I didn’t just lose Jungkook that day. I had to live for Tae, and in doing so, I stopped living for myself.”

I stopped living for myself. Closing your eyes, you were only reminded how wrong you had been. The three of them were all in pain, refusing to admit it. They all blamed themselves, you were sure of it. 

But no one was to blame.

No one.

Still, you stayed silent, keeping these thoughts to yourself. Your eyes fluttered back open, and it was as if you were staring the past in the face once again. And god, did it have such a guilty conscience.

“I know it’s wrong, but there will always be a part of me that resents him for it,” Jimin went on, sighing as his words left his lips. “And he—” he gestured back to the karaoke room; back to where Yoongi still resided— “is the only reason I didn’t lose myself. He is the only reason I can fucking breathe just for a second . . . so that is why I’m here. I don’t care if it’s selfish. He’s my sliver of happiness, which is why . . . “ he wet his lips, staring at you as if you were a reflection of his own past “ . . . which is why I don’t blame Jungkook for the things he did for you back then. So . . . I don’t blame you either but . . . but I guess what I’m trying to say is . . . I know what I did. I will always regret it and I will always wish I could turn back time and make it all go away, but I can’t.”

Which is why I don’t blame Jungkook for the things he did for you back then, you repeated in your head once more. Was Jimin right? Had Jungkook truly loved you? 

And then, one more final question popped into your head: Did he still?

“Min?” 

The singular name brought you and Jimin out of your little bubble. The two of you turned your heads in the direction of the sound, finding Yoongi had peeked his head out of the karaoke room. His dark eyes shifted between you and his boyfriend, a skeptical look plastered across his face. 

“Everything’s fine,” Jimin replied with a tight smile.

That was when you saw it—the way Yoongi’s face softened instantly with just a couple of words from Jimin. You recognized that look. You’d seen that very expression reach Jungkook’s face time after time again in the past months you’d spent getting to know each other more and more and . . . 

Wait . . . 

Wait, wait . . . you recognized that look, but in a deeper way, in a visceral way. Yes, you’d seen Jungkook wear it many times, but . . . you could have sworn you’d seen it somewhere else, too. You could have sworn you’d catch glimpses of it on your own face when you’d walk past a mirror or catch your reflection in a puddle. And you’d always catch sight of it when . . . Jungkook was up ahead or behind or near. 

Yes, that was it. You’d seen that expression on your own face when Jungkook was involved. But . . . did that mean? 

No, no . . . no. Stop it. You couldn’t think about what this meant or that meant or this or that and those and them or whatever! No. 

Right now . . . right now you had to focus. Jungkook had run off and you . . . you needed to find him, but—

Your gaze fixated on Jimin once again. What happened back then . . . He wasn’t to blame. No one was. They, all three of them, were in pain, blaming themselves and yet too scared to face it. None of them would dare to either. But it was so clear that Jungkook missed Taehyung and Jimin as well. And now . . . now it was clear just how much Jimin missed the both of them . . . 

And well, you could do something about that. Perhaps then this guilt would leave you alone. Perhaps then things could be set right. Maybe then things could be the way they were supposed to be before life got in the way.

The answer was clear, and you couldn’t stop yourself. “Jimin,” you began, clearing your throat and interrupting the conversation between him and his boyfriend. Once his eyes were on you, with a clearing of your throat, you continued. “I’m sorry . . . for blowing up on you. I didn’t realize that—nevermind—just . . . Jungkook . . . he misses you . . . and Tae. I can see that. He’s . . . He doesn’t hate you, you know? He blames himself, yes, but he’s not angry with either of you. I think he just wants you guys back . . . so . . . if there’s any way . . . ask Hoseok for my number.” You paused for only a second to swallow. “You shouldn’t have to live with regrets.”

A beat of silence followed your words once again, almost as if it were mocking you. But instead of turning your words to shit, Jimin welcomed the silence. He embraced it as a small smile lifted onto his lips. And then . . . then he nodded.

It was a silent agreement, but it was good enough for you. 

This could be it.

A new leaf.

For him.

For Jungkook.

For Jungkook, you affirmed, and with that thought, you nodded back. “It was nice to meet you, Yoongi,” you mumbled genuinely, before your eyes shifted back to Jimin once again. Another nod from you. “Jimin. Tell Hoseok that Kook and I went to eat, yeah? We’ll see him at practice tomorrow.”

“Hey—“ Jimin piped up before you could leave— “remember to live for yourself, too, yeah?”

And you nodded back with a smile.

The world fell away piece by piece as you turned from them, their faces still glued to the back of your mind, but you couldn’t waste any more time. As it was, your anger had already bubbled over and burned enough bridges that night to waste a lifetime. You should’ve kept your cool. You should’ve tried to see everything from a bigger picture, but this rage trapped inside you seemed to be bigger than you knew how to control. Sure, it had subsided now . . . but only because . . . because that was what was right.

You didn’t know how to explain it, but . . . Jungkook had become someone important to you, perhaps the most important in your life. You’d never felt that before. You never thought you’d be able to care about someone this much before, but . . . you did, and that was enough to put away that anger boiling deep inside you just enough to do right . . . for him.

Did that make you crazy? Maybe . . . maybe it did, but there wasn’t much in you to care about things like that. All you wanted was to find him. If you found him, everything would be alright. It would. You swore it would. 

Your feet didn’t feel like your own as you raced down the halls of the karaoke bar. The lights had begun to blur together in your vision, creating mixes of blue and purple racing in your peripheral. You’d even looked into room after room, disturbing group after group, solely searching for him.

Until . . . with your heart pounding in your chest, your breathing uneven, and a relentless shiver shaking throughout your body, through the muted colorful lights, you caught sight of a man’s figure crouched down in a corner of the building. His hands were covering his ears, his face hidden in his knees as he breathed heavily, but he was there. You’d found him. Instantly, your muscles relaxed. Exhale.

You’d found him. “Ju—” but you quickly cut yourself off before you could draw any attention to yourself.

Think. You had to think. You couldn’t approach him like you normally would. You couldn’t go in all thorns and nails on a chalkboard. This was different. This was what you had read about. What you realized you had never been good at—comfort.

How could you comfort? You had never been nurturing. Hell, you’d read something once that told you some women just weren’t meant to be mothers, and you knew you were one of them. You knew you couldn’t didn’t know how to be . . . soft.

But you had to try. For him . . .

And then you remembered:

Five Ways You Can Help Someone With an Anxiety Disorder:

Validate Their Feelings by Letting Them Know It’s Okay Not to Be Okay

Don’t Tell Them to Calm Down

Encourage Them to Focus on Things They Can Change

Help Them to Help Themselves

Discourage the Use of Alcohol or Drugs to Cope With Anxiety

But . . . but . . . fuck! How was that supposed to help you now? Let them know it’s OK not to be OK. OK . . . You swallowed hard. You could do that. Focus on things they can change. OK, OK. You could do that, too.

Hesitantly, you took a step forward.

But shit! You paused, halting in your movements. What if that didn’t work? What if you didn’t do it right? What if it only made it worse? What if you only made him worse?

Just . . . just . . . fuck, OK! Just— 

“Kookie,” you heard yourself say clearly before you knew you had even opened your mouth.

In response, his breathing stopped but he didn’t raise his head to meet your gaze. Instead . . . “It’s OK. Just go back . . . “ he muttered out, just loud enough for you to hear, but he still wouldn’t meet your eyes. “I’m OK.”

I’m OK. You swallowed hard. No . . . no, he wasn’t, and unlike all those years ago, you were not going to leave him behind. Not now. Never again.

It didn’t take another second for you to cross the distance to him before you sank to your knees right in front of him, reminding yourself not to startle him. “I’m here,” was all you said, fighting against everything harsh and rough in you, trying desperately to be soft.

The thing was: people could tell you countless amounts of things on how to help someone, but . . . you’d never get it. You weren’t good at it. You couldn’t do that, be that. You knew him, too. He wasn’t textbook like all the things you’d read up on. You assumed no one was . . . so . . . you’d like to add one more to the list: ask him how you could help.

“What—” you inhaled sharply— “What do you need me to do?”

Still, Jungkook would not meet your eyes, but he didn’t need to. You saw his body shift. You saw him process your words. And you knew he wasn’t going to hide from you. “Just—” he all but choked out— “ground me. Put your arms. Squeeze . . . hard.”

And just like that, you acted quickly. You didn’t waste any time as you scooted behind him, wrapping your arms around his figure, locking him into your body, and squeezing as he’d instructed. Resting your cheek on his back, you continued hugging his body to yours, listening to his heartbeat as you did so. Squeezing your eyes shut, you begged for this to help him, but the beat of his racing heart met your ears like a drum.

It wasn’t enough. You had to keep going. 

“OK, OK, what else?” you asked him, your voice clear and calm . . . and soft.

But the beat of his heart was the only thing you heard.

Ground him. You squeezed harder. “You’re here with me. I’ve got you. You’re safe. Speak to me, Koo,” you all but begged.

“Tell me something,” he mumbled, and you nearly exhaled in relief. “Please, say anything.”

Nodding quickly, you tried to scrounge up something, anything. “OK, um, um,” you stuttered out, racking your brain over and over again, until finally . . . “Do you remember when we were kids and my parents rented that cabin for the summer? You had this fake tattoo of a dragon that you really really wanted to put on your arm right—“ you grabbed his forearm, pressing your thumb into a spot— “here, but I wanted everything you had so I just had to have the tattoo. I whined and whined until you finally let me have it. And yet, in the end, my mom forgot to take off the plastic so neither of us ended up with the damn tattoo and we were both pissed.” Smiling against his back, you readjusted your grip on him, holding him closer than before, perhaps so close your souls could almost touch. “Your mom made us hold hands until we got over it.”

And with a small smile on your face, you heard it . . . 

His heart rate had started to slow, his breathing becoming more controlled as he tried his hardest to breathe in deep and exhale long. Was it? Was it working? OK. OK. Speak more. Speak—

“Yeah, and you wouldn’t stop crying, meanwhile, I won that thing in a raffle,” he interrupted before you could rack your brain for another memory. 

Wetting your lips, you replied, “But it worked, didn’t it?” Your eyes danced around the room, the memory almost as clear as day. The smile on your face grew. “We were sitting by the fire, getting way too messy with those s’mores you swore you knew how to make.”

“We camped outside the entire night,” Jungkook mumbled under his breath, his shoulders shaking slightly as a small laugh escaped him.

“Yeah, until you almost pissed your pants because you thought you heard a bear,” you remarked, the smile on your face too wide to contain.

“Hey!” he quipped back as his hand fell to your arm. “I was like nine.”

In shock, you watched as Jungkook slowly raised his hands to cover your arms, hugging them to his chest. Then, you rested your ear against his chest, and you realized his heartbeat had returned almost to normal . . . and . . . and . . . his breathing had calmed. And then you saw it, a drop of . . . something had wet his shirt where your cheek laid . . . and you realized . . . you were crying.

Was this softness that you felt? Or weakness?

The truth was: you didn’t care. Not now. 

Quickly, you wiped your damp cheeks on your shoulder and sniffled. “Scaredy cat,” you mumbled with a soft laugh.

Jungkook breathed out a laugh through his nose. “Brat,” he hummed as he squeezed your forearm.

A beat of silence met the two of you then. You nestled closer, holding him until he finally gave you the go-ahead that he was alright. You’d stay there all night if you had to. And he welcomed this with open arms, holding you as close as he could in his position, and just letting things . . . be, it seemed. 

Until, finally, after what seemed like hours, he whispered against your forearm, “I’m sorry.”

And you couldn’t help yourself. Your brows pinched together, confusion revisiting you as you asked, “For what?”

“You don’t need this,” was his only answer.

Another beat of silence.

And then: “You’ll always be unhappy when it comes to me.”

Squeezing your eyes shut, your only response was to hug him tighter. Fuck.

It is not the moon, I tell you. It is these flowers lighting the yard.

As the night droned on, writings upon writings popped into your head as you tried to make sense of this, of tonight, of everything; one, in particular, visited you too frequently to be ignored; one that you had held onto for years now. You supposed it was a silly thing—realizing just how many poems you had trapped in your head, but you had three years of isolation, three years of loneliness, three years where you only read and read and read. Those three years . . . poems had been all you had.

You supposed it would always end this way.

I hate them. I hate them as I hate sex, the man’s mouth sealing my mouth, the man’s paralyzing body—

And like the poem stated, these words remained true to you. You hated many things, perhaps too much. In those three years, you had grown to hate another’s touch, perhaps because you craved it so viscerally. But . . . the scent of mock orange wasn’t in the form of a man for you. To you . . . the scent of mock orange smelled a lot like a badminton racket.

and the cry that always escapes, the low, humiliating premise of union—

Perhaps you had grown to hate badminton. You hadn’t even realized it, but . . . looking back at it now . . . you had done everything to be someone . . . to be the best, and you had wanted that. You had really wanted that. Sometimes you thought it was the only thing that would ever make you happy, but . . . 

But . . . 

In my mind tonight I hear the question and pursuing answer fused in one sound that mounts and mounts and then is split into the old selves, the tired antagonisms. Do you see? We were made fools of. And the scent of mock orange drifts through the window.

But perhaps . . . like growing pains . . . a part of you had outgrown badminton. Could this be real? Could you really have outgrown the one thing you had ever loved? And if you truly had . . . what did that mean for you now?

How can I rest? How can I be content when there is still that odor in the world?

That odor.

That damned odor of mock orange blossoms.

. . . You had smelt them the day of the incident. The stench had followed you to the hospital, crawling under your skin and resting there for the months to follow. They hadn't even bloomed then, yet you still smelt them every time you breathed. When your heart felt less heavy and your mind was clearer than the day before, when it became month after month after month, the scent finally rid itself from your senses. And you thought you might have actually been allowed to rest without that odor in the world.

But as another month melted into the next, and you tried to get back onto your feet again, the scent of mock orange drifted back into your life. You, of course, ignored this, eager to get back on your feet. You’d been able to take a few steps, which eased the ache you had been carrying around for the past few months. You knew it was stupid to imagine you could actually be healed after a few months, but you didn’t care. You just wanted to walk again . . . maybe run . . . maybe play again with a racket in your hand.

It was nice—being able to dream for a few minutes.

But it did only last for a short time. Soon you being you had gotten too cocky in your progress. You wanted to try longer walks. You wanted to see if you could run.

Then as you ignored the warning signs from your parents, from your doctors, from your nurses, the second they allowed you out on the hospital courtyard, you took off, attempting to run. But . . . before you knew it, something snapped and . . . you were tumbling to the ground, crying in pain.

And just like that . . . the scent of mock orange drifted in and remained in the air.

You remembered just laying there after that, contemplating just how much this would set you back as the nurses hurried you back to your room to be examined. You wondered if you had fucked yourself entirely. You wondered if this was it and you would never be able to play or even walk again. You wondered what that made you now. You might as well have not even been a person anymore, because back then . . . badminton had been all that you had. Back then, if you weren’t the best; if you weren’t someone great, then you were nothing. 

And yes, you knew you had never been particularly interesting, but you never thought you were . . . nothing. The scent of mock orange tainting the air reminded you of the truth—without badminton, you might as well have been no one.

As you were escorted back to your room, examined, and left to rest, you laid there, the scent of mock orange being your sole company, and you realized you hated them. You hated those stupid, putrid flowers as you hated feeling . . . less. You hated them as you hated yourself.

Guilt might have been your ghost, but the scent of mock orange was your shadow.

How could you rest? How could you be content when there was still that odor in the world?

You were sure you never would.

And truly . . . how could you rest? If you were constantly trying to be better and better? When would you finally be the best? Could you be? No . . . no, you knew you couldn’t, but then who were you?

Who were you without . . . badminton?

That was the question on your mind as you flicked at your ramyeon with your chopsticks. You supposed like the mock orange blossoms, your coming-of-age escapades did not deliver the fruits of its promise. Becoming someone was all you had ever wanted out of life. You wanted glory. You wanted greatness. And yet . . . why did the thought of badminton slowly and slowly start to turn into this . . . dark thing? Why was it that when badminton was involved . . . bad things happened?

Now, you didn’t believe in signs and you surely wouldn’t start now . . . but it became evident that you had been made a fool of, wishing on a shooting star that was on its last breath. The scent of mock orange would drift in every time, reminding you that you would never reach that greatness again no matter how many times you tried. 

And that should’ve filled you with rage . . . jealousy . . . pain . . . but . . . you didn’t feel any of that. What you felt, at its core, was a gentle ache in your chest; the same kind of ache which came with nostalgia. 

You just couldn’t stop thinking of it. Actually . . . you hadn’t stopped thinking about that scent of mock orange since you saw Jimin earlier that night. He’d told you Taehyung had loved badminton the most . . . he told you he was a ghost of himself now because of what he lost. And then you began to think of what had happened to you . . . 

Those three years . . .

All you had ever thought about was getting back to the person you used to be. That was all you had cared about, and when you finally won that first game all those months ago . . . you had felt that same joy that you had always felt after a win. Except . . . this was different, you realized.

Remembering the win now, the image of you smashing the birdie down onto the court wasn’t what came to mind first. No, you remembered that day; you remembered the thrill of the win, but the image that came to mind first was Jungkook smiling down at you moments before you sprung into his arms.

Jungkook was what you remembered that day, not the look on the other team’s faces when you took home that winning title. And then you realized what you had been trying to ignore ever since you let your walls come down layer by layer: perhaps . . . perhaps there was more to life than badminton.

In the months you had let Jungkook in, you’d lived more than you had in your entire life. You’d laughed more, smiled more, felt more. You’d felt yourself be more. 

The scent of mock orange never visited you when he was around. It was like he was the real thing. You weren’t even sure if that made any sense. But . . . but . . . if you couldn’t smell those damned phony flowers, then perhaps Jungkook had taken their place. By chance . . . did he smell like an orange blossom? Without mocking, without malice, without trickery? Was he . . . real?

There was just something about the world that Jungkook had shown you that had a way of making everything just . . . mute. It was like before he’d shown you life through his eyes, everything had been loud, intense, brutal. And then . . . there he was, a bright smile on his face and the words ‘trust me’ leaving his lips as he held out his hand for you to take.

And you took it every time.

The scent of mock orange blossoms was left behind. And you began to wonder if just as you had outgrown your hatred for Jungkook . . . had you outgrown this visceral urge to hold a racket in your calloused hand?

Glancing down, you took in the image of your hand. The calluses were still there, the small cuts from accidental injuries, the bitten nails . . . they were all still there. Did they still fit around the base of a racket as they had three years ago?

You blinked, flexing your hand. Whatever, you decided. It would be tomorrow’s problem. (But we all know how good you were about . . . not . . . getting in over your head (so like, give yourself five minutes and you’d be thinking about it again).)

Whatever. Whatever. Whatever.

Anyway.

Focus on the present.

Yes, that was the plan. You nodded at your thoughts as you blinked, forcing yourself back to the present.

The scent of mock orange blossoms still lingered in the air as you tried grounding yourself to reality. Ignoring them was the best you could do. Because right now, you were supposed to be present, aware, and solid. You were supposed to be Jungkook’s shoulder to lean on after what he had endured at the karaoke bar. You were supposed to know what to do . . . but you didn’t know anything. You just . . . you just wanted him to be alright . . . 

And all you could focus on was the fact that the two of you hadn’t spoken since you held him about—

You checked your phone.

—an hour and a half ago.

It had been quiet between the two of you ever since. It had been even quieter the second you stepped inside the nearest convenience store. (Who knew how long ago that was.)

The convenience store was perhaps too quiet now. The two of you had bought some instant ramyeon—one spicy, one mild and sat at the nearest tables outlooking the streets of Busan. Many people had walked back and forth, going about their night (well . . . now early morning), but not once had either of you decided to make little guesses about their lives as you had done many times before. No instead . . . Jungkook was silent. And you were too. 

But . . . you didn’t like the silence; not like . . . this. Slowly, with that thought plaguing your mind, you turned your head toward him.

Jungkook sat beside you, his head lowered slightly as he stared blankly out the window. He hadn’t touched his ramyeon once, which was evident as his chopsticks were all too clean without any stain or color. He just kept staring out the window, following those who walked by with his eyes all the while his tongue toyed with his lip ring. 

It was obvious why he was stuck in this limbo. Sure, of course it was all too obvious, but that didn’t make it any easier. Knowing why he was stuck like this wouldn’t do anything to . . . help.

And suddenly you were reminded of what Jimin had told you that night. Remember to live for yourself, too, he’d said before you left him. He’d told you it was impossible to live for two, but . . . why? Why couldn’t you? Why couldn’t you at least . . . help? You supposed the problem in that was the fact that you had no idea how to help, and that scared you more than you’d liked to admit.

You just . . . you just wanted him to be OK . . .

“You gonna eat that?” you heard yourself ask him before you knew what you were even saying.

Jungkook turned to you instantly with an almost shocked expression on his face as if he couldn’t remember where he was or who he was, but his eyes still shined with recognition as if he could still recognize you despite it all. He blinked slowly, eyes drifting over your face, and then . . . then he slowly started to relax. His shoulders slumped slightly as the stiff muscles in his face loosened. And once he returned to the present, his eyes drifted from your questioning expression to the ramyeon in front of him . . . and then he was shoving a huge bite into his mouth all the while maintaining eye contact with you while he chewed.

You shot him a blank look, because you knew what he was doing—avoiding the inevitable by trying to make light of the situation. “I wasn’t going to force-feed it to you, you know?” you ended up mumbling as you continued to watch him chew, half making sure he ate all of it and half not sure where to rest your gaze.

“Don’t look at me like that then,” Jungkook muttered, his words muffled from the food in his mouth.

“Like what?” you questioned as you leaned closer to him, analyzing the crease between his furrowed brows.

His eyes shifted to the ground ever so slightly before he turned back to meet your gaze. “Like you pity me or something,” he huffed, jutting out his bottom lip into a pout as he averted his gaze to his bowl of ramyeon.

And you couldn’t help but let the corners of your mouth perk up into a small smile. He was still the boy you remembered when you were kids. He hadn’t changed too much. He was still . . . him. Only now, you had grown to appreciate how he was unlike in the past. Now . . . when he flashed you that pout, you wasted no time in waving him off with a small sigh. 

“Oh, Jungkookie,” you all but mused as you grabbed a napkin from the table, “sometimes it’s like you’re still that whiny little kid I grew up with.” You brought the napkin to his lips, gently dabbing. “You really haven’t changed at all, you know?”

With his eyes flicking from the napkin to your face, he timidly licked his lips and mumbled, “I was not whiny.”

You breathed a small, barely audible laugh. “Mmm, if it helps you sleep at night,” you hummed with a small shrug as your hand, now discarding the napkin, reached his face once again, except this time, you barely thought about your next move. Instead, you let your hand drift to his hair gently curling the long, dark strands behind his ear. 

And he just stared at you, his dark eyes warm and gentle as they always had been. His brows twitched as you alternated between playing with his earrings and toying with the longest strands of his hair. He almost seemed . . . at peace, and you wondered if this could be considered a moment of happiness?

Perhaps . . . 

It was moments like this that you wondered how the sick smell of mock orange blossoms had ever ruined your life. 

But like the poem described . . . the smell wasn’t something to be forgotten. It eventually seeped back in. And just as Jungkook had almost allowed himself to sink into your touch, his eyes turned back to the window where he caught a glimpse of his reflection.

It was almost soul-crushing how fast his face fell.

Jungkook took one last look at his reflection, shaking his head slightly as he averted his gaze to the table and clenched his jaw. "Fuck,” he whispered out, his voice hoarse, “this is so fucking annoying. Everything feels so off. I just . . . “ His words tangled around his tongue as he dropped his head to his hands. “Everyone always looks at me like I'm some fucking problem. Like if they get to my core, they can fix me. But I can't be fucking fixed. I fucked up. I ruined my best friend’s life. I don't deserve to be fixed."

And suddenly it was as if you were twelve years old again, seeing your mother cry for the first time and not knowing what to do or what to say. You had grown up that way—not being able to comfort. It had always been who you were. You’d never known what to do to . . . help. 

Yes, you could follow the directions of some online article and you could ask and ask and ask how to help him, but would it ever be enough? And what if he said he was fine when he was so clearly not? What then? How were you supposed to help then?

God, you wished you knew the answers. 

“You’re not broken, Koo,” you started with, your voice just as small as how you felt in that moment.

“What if I am?” he mumbled into his hands. Slowly, he raised his head, and for another time that night, you faced that crushed look on his face. For another time that night, you saw the things he had been dealing with all on his own. You saw him. “What if I . . . ?”

And then you realized: you didn’t know how to comfort, but you did know how to bear things well. You knew how to crumble up the pain of not being good enough. You knew how to deal with a dream being crushed. You knew how to just . . . deal, and if Jungkook needed help, you could carry the load for him.

So, swallowing your own emotions bubbling up in your throat, you began slowly, "I know I can’t say . . . anything. I know that no matter what I do it's not gonna' make you feel better, because shit doesn't work that way. I'm not some fuckin' hero. I know that. You just need to know that I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere, okay? I'm never leaving your side." Nodding your head, you could feel your eyes burning again. But you didn’t care. The world could see you cry for him and only him and you’d accept it with a heavy heart.

A beat of silence followed your confession.

The world exhaled.

You inhaled as you rested your hand on top of his moments before you began again, "You're—I care about you. . . and—and that means that no matter what time it is, if you feel like you're gonna do something to yourself, then you call me. We can go throw shit off a bridge or—or punch dummies. You need to scream? Then we can go scream until our lungs bleed, okay? Whatever. It doesn't matter. Just—" you squeezed his hand as your heart pulsed in pain in your chest— "You're not alone."

Though the expression on his face didn’t lift, Jungkook accepted your hand, taking it within his grasp to intertwine your fingers together with his. “It’s been months . . . and I still feel like this . . . “ he trailed off, gently shaking his head as he turned back to his reflection in the window.

Instantly, your free hand found his cheek, slowly turning his head so his eyes would only face yours. “I don’t think healing is . . . linear,” you admitted softly. “If I think about it . . . it took me years to be able to play again. Mental shit has to be like that too, right?”

His eyes fluttered shut under your touch. “I don’t know,” he softly sighed as his other hand reached to rest over the one you had caressing his cheek. “I’m just tired of feeling like this.” He swallowed thickly. “I just . . . it’s like . . . I watch everyone else live their lives while I endure mine. And—And I don't know what to do. Sometimes everything just gets so intense, and it just happens. It's like it's some fucked up kind of instinct. Trust me, I wish I could feel something other than this, but I don't feel anything. It's all fucking numb." He nearly dropped your hand, but you clung on tighter, refusing to let him slip through your fingers. "I don't fucking know what I feel. I just . . . I feel like a fucking ghost."

And for the second time that night, you watched the once never-bothered Jungkook reveal another layer of himself to you. 

I feel like a fucking ghost, rang in your ears again.

Jungkook squeezed his eyes tight and slowly . . . a single tear trickled from the corner of his eye down the side of his nose. 

I feel like a fucking ghost, once more, and you knew the words which would leave your lips before you even had the chance to think.

"Haunt me, then," you found yourself breathing out in a hushed whisper as your thumb caught his fallen tear, wiping it away with ease.

His eyes cracked open, a shocked expression crawling onto his face. "What?” he barely got out as he searched your eyes for anything that would tell him you hadn’t meant to say . . . that.

But you had.

Haunt me, you’d told him, and you knew you’d meant it. The words didn’t have to cross your mind for you to know what you spoke was the truth.

Haunt me.

Haunt me.

Haunt me.

Give it to me, and breathe.

That is what you had wanted to say. That is what you had meant. You could only hope he knew you were telling the truth.

Tilting your head to the side, you breathed out the air in your lungs. "I told you before, and I meant it,” you began in a gentle tone. “I'll carry the weight for you. All of the pain, the anger, the hatred . . . all of it . . . I will carry it all. Give it all to me, and I will find a way to deal with it." Squeezing his hand once again, you offered up a small smile. "You're not alone anymore, Kook. You do not have to deal with all your shit on your own. You've got me, and you can hate me, you can push me away, you can leave me stranded with no way home . . . but I promise you, I'm not going anywhere."

His brows twitched. “I can’t do that. You’ve got too much to think about.”

You shrugged with a roll of your eyes as you dropped your hand to your intertwined ones. “Like what? I’ve never thought a day in my life. Barely passed college with a 2.7,” you hummed, your voice a little more chipper now as you tried to keep his eyes on you and coax a smile out of him. “I’ve got nothing to worry about.”

“The games,” he muttered with a small sniffle. “You’re shit at multitasking.”

That time, you did smile wider. There he was. “I can manage,” you mused as you leaned into him, nudging him with your elbow. “How about let’s go feed the fish by our hotel after practice tomorrow, hmm? To relax? Yeah?”

And then . . . you could have sworn he nodded. Maybe it was to himself or maybe it was to you, but you knew what it meant. You would accept a nod.

“You gonna eat that?” he asked a second later, gesturing to the half-eaten bowl of ramyeon in front of you.

And you knew he would be OK by your side. You would make sure of it. (You were the older one after all.)

So with a small smile still on your face, you detached your hands from his and reached for your bowl, scooting it toward him. Quietly, he took it from you and began to devour what you had left.

Yeah . . . he was still the same kid you knew growing up. And that . . . that was enough to make your heart feel warm.

It made you wonder if you could ever be . . . warm . . . like him. Unlike this cold, hollow shell you were so used to. Was that even written in your books? 

Wetting your lips, your eyes fell to your lap, only to be met with the image of Jungkook’s hand resting on your thigh, secured under the holes in your ripped jeans. It seemed without you noticing, Jungkook had absentmindedly reached for you, toying with the strings adorning the rips in your jeans, only to end up nestled underneath in an attempt to feel your skin against his.

It was sweet. Innocent. 

It made you feel warm, yet again, yes. But it also made you feel . . . fuck . . . what was that word?

And that was when you realized something . . .

“You’re wrong, you know?” you ended up muttering out before your brain could catch up with your impulse.

Jungkook hummed, eyeing you. His eyes were still slightly puffy, causing your heart to swell in your chest.

How could he ever think he deserved this?

Wetting your lips, you confessed, “I’m a better person because of you. How could I ever be unhappy with that?”

Jungkook blinked, clearly shocked. Then, he began to toy with his lip ring before he sucked in a sharp inhale and nearly whispered, “All I want . . . is for you to be happy.”

And you couldn’t help but smile. It was warm. It was innocent. It was because of him. “Would you look at that?” you mused in a quiet voice. “Looks like we just came to an agreement.”

The corners of his lips twitched ever so slightly as he nodded once before the two of you resumed your late-night slash early-morning meal. He finished your food for you, and you watched, making sure he ate it all, all the while, the words, I’m a better person because of you rang throughout the air.

I’m a better person because of you.

How could I ever be unhappy with that?

And you knew you meant every word.

The scent of mock orange blossoms couldn’t reach you now. 

Not here. 

Not with him.

When you were a kid, every Barbie doll your mother ever bought you would end up scalped and decapitated. Now . . . morbid . . . you knew. You weren’t exactly sure why you resorted to . . . that, but playing with dolls just always meant ripping their heads off. You supposed it was kind of symbolic now. 

Maybe you were jealous that their lives were perfect and yours was . . . meh. Or maybe you really just really hated dolls.

You supposed there had always been a certain sickness to you; a certain uneasiness that came with being a preteen girl. You were told sweet sixteen was when the claws came out, but you began to question if yours had grown in long before then. Maybe you had been born like . . . this or maybe everyone just felt this way and spent most of their lives hiding it, because if not . . . 

. . . it felt like life was just some sick joke that you hadn’t clued in on yet.

Perhaps that was why you had become so keen on poetry: it said what you feared only you felt. 

Because really, you used to use pages out of books to fasten a joint in a pinch, too, and now it physically hurt to imagine ever even tearing a page. 

But words felt more comforting now. Sure, a racket felt like it fit into you like a hook in an eye, but now . . . now it felt just a tad more awkward than it had in the past. Words . . . words could never disappoint you, you decided long ago when they had been all that you had had.

There’s something soft in me—

You remembered reading long ago.

—we killed it and it’s rotting.

And maybe it was silly. Maybe it was dramatic, but words made things feel better. It made the world less scary. It made looking at Jungkook and wondering what this feeling in your chest was . . . not so scary. It made things . . . better.

So, you’d read, and you’d overanalyze, and you’d spend your time too wrapped up in words because it made everything that much bearable. Because it made the fact that your claws didn’t come in at sixteen so much easier to swallow; it made the fact that there was nothing soft about you alright.

Because maybe there had been something soft about you long ago. Or maybe you had killed it; maybe you had taken the softness and traded it for survival, only to discover all the rot inside of you that you had been trying to ignore for years now. 

Had the fire gotten a hold of you even back then? 

Is that why you no longer feared it? Because there was nothing left to fear? Did all this rot mean you were no different from a hit deer off the highway? 

. . . 

Whatever. 

It didn’t mean much, right? 

There were no birds coming to feast on your rotting corpse like the deer you wondered if you resembled. Nothing had come to consume your body as the world had consumed your soul. You were just there . . . 

With a sigh, you clicked off your phone, disregarding the poem as you shoved it all away into the back of the pocket of your athletic shorts. And as you stood there, you slowly glanced up only to meet the image of Jungkook walking toward you, a half-smile on his tired face with a duffel bag over his shoulder and a racket in his hand. You hadn’t seen him since you woke up that morning, quickly dressed and told him you’d meet him at the center after your run. And there he was, his hair in a small ponytail with a grin on his face at the sight of you. (You tried to ignore the urge to meet him halfway. (Also ignoring this . . . weird feeling blooming in your chest the second you saw him.))

“Well, it seems the sun’s decided to come out after all,” were the first words out of his mouth as he drew closer. And only then did you realize the day was dreary, filled with dark clouds and humid spring air. 

Tearing your eyes from the clouds above, your gaze landed on Jungkook just as he stopped before you, setting his duffel bag on the pavement beside you. He wasted no time either, poking your abdomen with his racket. “Bad day already?” he questioned, tilting his head to the side in thought.

Sighing, you shook your head. “No, just . . . thinking.”

“Well, stop, it’s aging you,” he lightly scolded.

You squinted your eyes into a glare. “You’re on one today.”

And well . . . all he did was wink. Of course.

Now . . . you knew how this looked. Just last night you and him were up into the early morning nursing each other’s wounds and now it seemed like it hadn’t even happened, but there was a reason for that. The two of you knew each other. He appreciated that you didn’t make it a big thing. You were always going to be there for him; that much was obvious by now given your history with each other. But if there was one thing the two of you both hated, it was being treated as if you were as fragile as glass. So for now . . . last night was a little secret between the two of you, and right now . . . right now you both had to get your heads in the game for the finals tomorrow.

So there . . . that was that. At least that was how it was for you. You were sure it was the same for him, but it wasn’t like you could think about that right now either. Right now you had to think of the tournament as draining as it felt to even acknowledge it.

But just as you were about to move past it all and grab your own duffle bag from the ground, Jungkook halted you with a hand on your wrist. Your eyes immediately snapped to his.

“You sure you’re good?” he questioned once more, his eyes wider now, more concerned than before.

(There’s something soft in me—

But you couldn’t burden him now. Not after what he went through last night. Because you knew him, and you knew he’d do anything to make things right for you . . . even if it meant ignoring his own troubles. And well, despite what you liked to claim, you couldn’t bear to do that to him.

—we killed it and it’s rotting.)

So instead, you blurted out: “Just stressed, you know?”

His brows pinched together slightly, but he didn’t press it further. “Right . . . “

And that was that. You didn’t let another word pass between the two of you as you picked up both your duffel bag and his and began to walk toward the training center. Jungkook, of course, fought you the entire way, trying to grab the duffel bags from your hands, but you insisted, tsking at him as he tried to outsmart you (as if he ever could).

While he repeatedly tried to snatch at least one bag from your grasp, your eyes were training on the scene in front of you. And it was only when the two of you turned the corner, now facing the center head-on, that you realized maybe the dark clouds had been a sign telling you to turn back; to stay inside; to practice somewhere else. Jungkook, on the other hand, was preoccupied, as, in your shock, he managed to snatch both duffel bags from your grasp. And he was mighty proud of himself too until he heard what you had seen . . . and slowly the grin fell from his lips as he turned to face the scene.

Because before the two of you, crowding in front of the training center were reporters on top of reporters with their big flashy cameras and notepads, and . . . behind them, spray painted across the building was your name . . . with the words ‘is a traitor’ too big not to notice.

There’s something soft in me—

we killed it and it’s rotting.

It happened in slow motion. The reporters caught sight of the two of you, and that was it. They were racing toward you in seconds, all screaming this and that, trying to get a story, and all you could do was stare in a state of confusion and shock as if you were waiting for a car to pop out of nowhere and hit you.

Off the highway like another deer.

You’d never seen something like it. Sure, you’d seen this stuff in movies, but never in real life, never because of . . . you. There had been articles published when you fell out of the badminton scene three years ago, but never something like this. Never something like this. Fuck, even the interview you’d done as a team were never like . . . this.

Off the highway like another girl.

What was . . . this?

It was bad. You knew it was bad, but you couldn’t hear anything. You could see Jungkook growing angry beside you, pushing the reporters back as he said . . . something . . . but you couldn’t quite make out what it was. You couldn’t hear it. You couldn’t hear anything.

You should have known better. You should've known there was a chance something bad would happen. Because like always, when you got that sick feeling in the pit of your stomach, when the dark clouds came out and the air felt wet but chilly but humid . . . something bad always happened. But you hadn't thought that the world would be so cruel, especially the day before the end.

This wasn’t supposed to happen. This wasn’t supposed to—

You felt the world caving in on you. You felt small. Small and disgusting. You wanted to disappear. You wanted to run, but you couldn't. Your mind had been the only thing to stay alert. Just run, you thought. Run. Run. Fucking run.

But you couldn't. You wanted to but the camera kept flashing and the reporters kept yelling and yelling and yelling and all you could make out was that everyone hated you. Suddenly, it was three years ago and everyone was pretending to be nice to you, then bitching about you behind your back. Suddenly, you were falling. Your hip was hurting. You were screaming and nobody cared. Nobody cared. Nobody—and then you were pushing everyone away again. Suddenly, you were alone again. And then you felt it. You felt it all, and then . . . then you couldn't breathe.

I can't breathe. You tried gasping for air, but it never stuck in your lungs. I can't breathe. You could have sworn this was what drowning felt like as your breaths came out quicker and quicker. Oh, my God, I can't fucking breathe.

You needed air. You needed to run.

Your eyes darted to the training center, and you knew what you had to do. You forced your legs to move as you tried to make it to the center. You’d be inside in a minute; you just needed a second. One second and you could breathe again.

But before you could even really move to make it, a hand was on your shoulder, and it wasn’t who you thought it’d be. No, it wasn’t a comforting touch; it was the touch of a reporter trying to make you stay in place just for you to answer their question. There was no making it out of this.

Glancing up, your eyes met the reporter’s and then you finally heard the words you’d been drowning out all morning: “Are the bribing rumors true?”

All air escaped your lungs. Bribing? You? “What?” you weakly asked (you’d never sounded like this before in your life, and yet . . . ).

But before anything else could escalate, Jungkook was stepping in front of you. His body blocked yours from the reporters, his hand carefully resting on your hip as he tucked you behind him while he mumbled, “Don’t bother—”

“What—” you blurted out before you could stop yourself— “What rumors?” 

You just . . . you wanted to know. Bribing? All you’d ever done in your career was try to be the best. You’d put blood and tears and sweat and everything into badminton, and this . . . this was how it repaid you. You’d fucked up your leg for it; fucked up your life; fucked up everything just to hold a fucking racket in your hand and now they wanted to say that you bribed your way into . . . into what? Success? You wanted to know the truth. You wanted to know.

But no one bothered giving you an answer. It was just question after question, confusing you more and more, and all you could come to the conclusion was the fact that the whole world must have thought you were as horrible as a person as you feared you were.

So, the final person asked, “Do you have anything to say?”

And all you could fathom was: “I—” you swallowed hard— “I . . . don’t care.”

That was it.

I don’t care, you’d said even though you did, because you always had. You cared too much. Too fucking much. And you were too much. And this was too much. And just . . . just . . . 

You didn’t bother thinking further. Your mind went blank as you tore yourself from the scene. Dropping your racket to the ground, you took a step backward. 

. . . And then you were gone.

Run, you’d told yourself, and finally, you listened.

And as you ran, you realized, things were easy for you when you could ignore them. If you spent your time worrying about everyone else, then there would be no more time left to worry about yourself. You supposed that was an issue on its own, but that was how you survived. 

A burnt child loves the fire. Yes, and you did. You loved it because it meant you’d have one more reason to survive. Survive enough and you wouldn’t have to deal with the aftermath. Just keep surviving the fire. That . . . that was what you were good at.

But you didn’t know how to deal with . . . this.

This wasn’t a fire. Far from it. 

It was almost as if you were stuck at the bottom of a lake, your foot trapped under a rock, unable to get to the surface. And no matter how hard you fought to unsheath yourself, you stayed trapped at the bottom, water threatening to clog your air pipes.

And the thing they don’t tell you about drowning: it only takes forty seconds.

Forty seconds turned into minutes then an hour, and you began to wonder how long you had been left at the bottom of that lake. How long until the water finally reached your lungs?

It was about half an hour ago when you’d finally found the pond just outside the hotel your team was staying in, that you’d finally searched up whatever the fuck had gotten you in so much shit.

Yunis Doubles Player Accused of Bribing Referee to Make Nationals, was the headline. Apparently, an anonymous inside source had come forward and claimed that you’d not only bribed your way into winning each tournament for your team, but on top of that, you were also taking whatever drug to help with your fucked leg.

And get this . . . apparently it was because once you won finals, you’d go on to sign for Russia, leaving Korea behind, essentially making yourself a traitor. So there it was. In less than a day, you were a traitor, a drug abuser, and a cheat. Because apparently, that was true. 

Whatever . . .  it didn’t matter anyway. Even though it wasn’t true, the media had made it so, so it was by default. And as if badminton hadn’t already been feeling like a chore, your love for it lessened and lessened into . . . this hate.

That was what you felt: hate. Had you become hatred now?

Had you become a ghost, too? . . . Had you always been? . . . 

“Don’t do it. You’ve got so much to live for,” you heard a voice say in a joking manner behind you just as you tossed another rock into the large pond below your dangling feet. (The voice had startled you all the same, nearing skyrocketing the rock out of your grasp, but we don’t dwell on that.)

Still . . . 

. . . you didn’t jump. There was no need to. Startled or not, there was no need to fear. You knew that voice, and it only ever filled you with comfort, nothing else.

So instead of answering, you dropped your head in shame, eyes on the koi fish swimming idly through the water below you as your hands tightened around the edge of the rickety bridge. 

Jungkook had found you. Somehow he always managed to make his way back to you, no matter how many times you pushed him away.

(It used to be annoying. Now it was just . . . well . . . it was something else now. It had grown into something . . . more . . .)

His footsteps grew closer. He was behind you now. Close, yet still so very distant.

Silence for only a beat more.

And then, he spoke.

“I was trying to find an excuse to come find you,” he murmured, his words unexpecting of a response as he sat down beside you, dangling his feet over the edge of the bridge.

And you . . . you stayed still, peeking at him through the corner of your eye. Sure enough, he was real, and he was sitting there dressed in his athletic clothes, some of his hair pulled back into a ponytail, while he held in his hands two pieces of . . . bread (?). 

Your brows scrunched in confusion. “Bread was your excuse?” you questioned, your voice quiet.

Jungkook glanced between you and the bread, then back at you until he settled on the bread, tapping a finger to the loaves. “Ah . . . right . . . well . . . buy one, get one free,” he curtly explained. His eyes drifted back to you, then, as he wet his lips and sighed. “You talked about wanting to feed the fish.” Add in a shrug. “Thought this might be where I’d find you . . . so—“ a clearing of his throat— “Just—Are you OK?”

And you couldn’t help it. You took him up on his offer, silently grabbing a loaf of bread from his hands and resting it on your lap. Your eyes followed it the entire way, watching as your hand began to rip a small piece from the corner. “I think,” you finally replied to his question just as you tossed the piece of bread into the water. “I can’t force people to believe me. So—” pausing for a second, you watched as two koi fought over the piece of bread— “whatever, right?”

Jungkook plucked a piece of the bread off, but instead of throwing it to the fish, he plopped it into his mouth, chewing in contemplation. “You were always the best player,” he mumbled through the mouthful. Plucking off another piece, he waved it in your direction, gesturing to you. “They can’t take that away.”

Maybe it was the sentiment or maybe it was how he’d begun to eat the bread he brought solely to feed the fish, but you couldn’t help but fight off a smile. Because when times were like this, you felt fine; you felt . . . almost good, but when you were out there neck-and-neck, trying to hit the birdie again and again, you felt . . . off.

It made you realize that one: badminton didn’t feel like it used to and two: you weren’t entirely sure that the accusation itself was the reason behind your anger. Because maybe it was easier to be angry or sad. It always had been. 

But as you ripped off another piece of bread to throw to the fish, it hit you. You weren’t exactly hard to figure out you’d like to think, so really, put two and two together and you get one burnt-out badminton player looking for an excuse to quit.

Fuck.

It really was that, wasn’t it?

You didn’t want it to be. You didn’t want to believe it either because badminton was your life. There was no without. Like a hook in an eye. Hook in eye. Hook in eye. Hook in eye. You couldn’t escape it. 

But now . . . after years and years of trying to get back to that same person you were before the accident, you’d ignored just how draining it had begun to feel to practice and practice and try and try and . . . try. You mistook it for physical fatigue; for healing from your injury. You didn’t once think that your disinterest may have been because you had grown further and further apart from a racket in your hand and the sound of the court squeaking under your shoes. And when that reporter asked you if you’d cheated to get back in the game . . . you’d taken that chance to run away; to ruin it for yourself once more . . . and this time not for the sake of self-sabotage but perhaps . . . conservation.

So you began to ask yourself the same question that had been haunting you for a while now: how well did badminton still fit into you? You’d thought about it last night. You thought about it a million times before, refusing to acknowledge it, and now . . .

Then you found yourself turning to Jungkook. “What—” you sucked in a quick breath— “What made you want to play badminton? . . . In the beginning . . . “

Setting the bread aside, he leaned forward, resting his forearm against the lower part of the railing. “I’m not really sure,” he mumbled as he rested his cheek against his forearm. “It was just . . . easy for me. I liked being good at things.”

“But . . . “ (you had begun to toy with the bread instead of tossing it to the fish) “ . . . why did you love it?”

A few beats of silence.

Beat.

Beat.

Beat.

Then, Jungkook spoke: “The people, I think,” he finally said in a calm, collected tone, adding in a shrug at the end of his sentence. “I never really cared about being someone special; I just when I played, I always played with friends. It was fun. I think when I look back on it, it wasn’t badminton that I loved, it was the people. My friends . . . coaches . . . “ his eyes flashed to meet yours, “. . . you.” And he maintained eye contact. “It was the only time I ever felt happy, and when I grew up . . . when badminton felt more like a game of loss . . . it lost its magic. I wasn’t a kid anymore. Everyone had grown up and I was still there, on that court. . . . It wasn’t fun anymore . . . “

Oh.

Because, truly, you’d felt the same. Well . . . perhaps a tad different. Badminton had been fun for you because you always won. It was the only time you felt . . . special, good . . . worth . . . something. And when you lost it all, you felt like nothing upon nothing upon shit. So when you finally gained it all back, it was almost as if with each win, that magic Jungkook spoke up washed away bit by bit. Winning wasn’t fun anymore; it was being with him that made it worth . . . something.

But could winning itself ever have the same effect as it did years ago? Would you ever crave it so violently again?

“Do you think it could ever be fun again?” you voiced your thoughts aloud, hesitant as if admitting this aloud was some kind of sin.

“Maybe,” Jungkook muttered with another shrug. His attention was drawn on the fish now, his round, brown eyes following them as they swam to and fro. “But—” he breathed in heavily— “if I had it my way . . . I’d go back home and help run my parents’ shop.” There was that smile creeping up on his face again at the mention of home. “And if I really had it my way, I’d be thirteen again and I’d never grow up. I’d be small and happy and I’d never have to leave home again. That is what I truly want; to be that kid again . . . but for right now . . . I think I’d settle with just going home, knowing my mom’s special dish is waiting for me.”

Home.

He spoke of it so fondly, and you began to wonder if you’d ever loved it as much as he did. Now, you knew you did. Your parents were good, kind people. They were good parents. You loved them, missed them, but home had never been something that you’d acknowledged if that made any sense. You were just always looking forward to the future and who you’d become. You supposed you never stopped to take in the lines drawn onto the bathroom wall labeling your height year after year. You supposed you never stopped to catch sight of the way your mom would shave off the skin of the apple because she knew you didn’t like getting it in your teeth. You supposed you never thought of home as home because you always knew it’d be there, and now . . . now it was far far away and you were so so small, no longer great and big, and looking forward to the future. 

It made you wonder if this feeling deep inside you had something to do with missing this home Jungkook spoke of. And then you began to agree that, yes, yes you would very much like to be small again, coming home from badminton practice to the smell of your mother’s cooking and your father’s tunes playing on the CD player.

Perhaps . . . perhaps you wished you were little again, too. And perhaps you wished you could start over, this time with badminton as more of a love than a state of survival . . . and maybe then you’d know more of this . . . home.

“Kook . . . “ you began, eyes darting from fish to fish as your thoughts raced, “if I admit something . . . do you promise not to judge?”

Jungkook hummed moments before he reached out to tuck your hair behind your ear. “What’s on your mind, hmm?” he mused, nudging you with his elbow as if telling you to go on.

Another few beats of silence. (It was odd how it kept lurking over your shoulder like a vice.)

And then: wetting your lips, you swallowed the weird feeling in your throat, finding it hard to get these words out for some reason. And then . . . when you were sure the silence had begun to eat at your flesh, you opened your mouth to voice your thoughts. “What if . . . what if I don’t love badminton anymore?” you mumbled, your voice nearly inaudible as you heard your words echo in your head again and again. But just like Pandora’s box, once they were spoken, you couldn’t shove them back down. Your words just kept flowing. “I mean . . . I’m—I’m twenty-five years old. All I’ve ever known is badminton. I ruined my life for it. I wasted three years trying to get it back and . . . and . . . and what if I did it for nothing? I wasted my entire life trying to be the best at something that I don’t even like anymore. What am I supposed to do if—if I don’t want it anymore?”

There.

Right there.

There was the truth you’d been hiding from for so long, and it was laid out in front of you, staring back at you.

What if you had wasted your entire life trying to be the best at something you didn’t even like anymore?

It wasn’t even like you wanted an answer from him either. You just needed to say it. You just needed to admit that perhaps you and Jungkook were more similar than either of you had ever thought. 

And did that . . . did that give you relief? To be understood in this way?

“I just—“ you blurted out, still trapped inside your head— “It’s like you said. I just . . . maybe I just want to go home. I don’t . . . I don’t want to go to the Olympics or—or anything. I don’t want to be who I was. I just . . . I don’t know if I care to be . . . that anymore.”

A beat of—wait—no, unlike you thought, no silence entered your space. No, instead, Jungkook didn’t miss a beat. “Oh, baby—” he sighed, his voice like honey moments before you felt a warm hand cup your cheek— “you haven’t changed one bit either. Don’t you know? Violet, roses are red, not blue.” Your eyes met. His filled with understanding, while yours stained in shock. And then . . . then he tapped his thumb against the corner of your mouth, and offered up a small smile. “Where’s your smile? Hmm?”

Instantly, you sucked in a sharp breath as your eyes fluttered ever so slightly, taken off guard by his words. You wet your lips, trying to form any kind of sentence, but nothing ever came. Until you realized something . . . this feeling . . . it wasn’t something you were used to . . . but it was something you’d heard of . . . and it was . . . soft.

You’d never held something like that. You’d never owned something like that either. You’d never been it. You’d always just been machine parts and badminton plays. Strategies upon strategies. Always thinking and thinking and thinking and never just . . . being . . . feeling . . .

Until . . . 

. . . until him.

And you had no idea how to handle that.

“I’m so scared,” you heard yourself whisper before you realized it was you who was speaking.

Jungkook furrowed his brows as his eyes trailed across your face before he wiped his thumb across your cheek, then dropped his hand to yours. Only then did you realize you had been crying. Not sobbing or anything close, but a few tears had slipped past, and there he was again wiping them away like it was normal; like it was OK.

“Why are you scared?” he questioned softly as he squeezed your hand.

“Because,” you muttered out with a confused shrug. Hell, you didn’t even really know. You just knew . . . you just knew that: “I’m only still here . . . on this team . . . because of you. I think . . . I think what I like about badminton is . . . you. You’ve made it worth something when it’d lost all meaning to me. And . . . and . . . I think what scares me the most is that . . . is that you’ve made me . . . soft . . . and I can’t tell if I hate that or if I . . . if I’m grateful.” Quickly, you wet your chapped lips. “I’ve had good things in my life. I’ve had success and victory and fame . . . but it all felt like it came with a price. You know? Win a competition and you feel great but what about the next one? It was always just a constant race . . . but being around you . . . it doesn’t feel like I have to win anything. I feel softer and—and it doesn’t even come with a catch. It’s free.” Your eyes searched his. “Am I even allowed to have something like that when I should be obsessing over winning this championship?”

Jungkook leaned closer, taking your hand into both of his as he held it close to his chest similar to how you’d hold a teddy when you were a child. And then . . . he spoke, and you couldn’t believe your ears, wondering if this was the same man you knew when you were young. “Have all of me,” he murmured, his eyes never leaving yours as if he wanted you to know he meant this within his soul. “Take my bones and build yourself a home. They’re worn, sure, but I like to think they’re pretty sturdy . . . so . . . take them.” His eyes searched yours deeper. “Take all of me if you have to. Take all of me . . . ”

Blinking slowly, you shot him a look, a small, shocked smile creeping onto your face as you let a sliver of a laugh out before you knew it. “That’s disgusting,” you scolded him, shaking your head at his words, but you couldn’t help but find some sentiment in them. Maybe it was the morbidity to you, but no one had ever said such things to you . . . and you found yourself holding these words close to your chest just as Jungkook held your hand close to his.

He smiled back, too. “Good. I knew it’d make you laugh,” he murmured softly, and you knew this, too. It was him after all. He’d do anything to get a laugh out of you, and you began to realize that it had always been that way. (Perhaps you should’ve spent your childhood laughing more than scowling at him.) But it seemed he didn’t mind as he began to rub his thumb back and forth against your knuckles, his smile slowly fading into a solemn expression. And then: “You asked me to haunt you, but you’re the one who haunts me.”

You swallowed hard.

You’re the one who haunts me.

Oh . . . 

And then you began to wonder: was Jimin right? He loved you, he had told you. And suddenly, you realized that if this were still true . . . it didn’t bother you. You’d accept it even. But what did that mean for you?

You swallowed hard once again.

“You said I make you feel real again,” he continued on, making you forget your own thoughts as you watched his head tilt to the side in thought, ever so slightly. “I’ve thought about it. I don’t want to haunt you. I don’t want to poison your softness. I want to make you keep feeling real and soft and . . . you. And . . . and well . . . you make me want to be real again. You–you make me want to be a person, to be something, to make something of the person I am. I don’t want to end up like your King Weir—”

“Lear,” you felt yourself whisper so quietly you almost didn’t hear it. All you could do was stare at him and stare and stare and . . . 

“I don’t want to be him,” Jungkook restated. A small pause followed as those warm brown eyes you’d come to be fond of searched yours like you were the only two people left on the planet. “I don’t want to be nothing . . . and you’ve reminded me of that.” Wetting his lips, he reached for your other hand, now holding both your hands in his, his thumbs running across your knuckles.  “So I was wondering—” he maintained eye contact, while he gave a quick squeeze to your hands— “if maybe instead . . . well . . . I want you to help me live . . . no haunting necessary.”

I want you to help me live.

It echoed in your ears.

I want you to help me live.

I want you to help me live.

I want you to—

Did he know that he’d given you a whole new reason to keep living? Did he know that when you thought of him, you realized you had another reason to live? Didn’t he realize that it was him? That caring for him had made you a better person?

But Jungkook took your silence as a sign of rejection, so before you could slap yourself up the side of the head, he nearly retreated, quickly muttering out an apology for being . . . weird. Only, this was now and not then, and you were you, and well, you quickly reached for his hands, pulling them into your lap. His eyes followed your movements, clearly taken off guard, but you didn’t let him dwell on it too long.

“How about—” you began, running your thumb across the tattoos dotting his fingers— “let’s take care of each other?”

Jungkook blinked once. Then twice. Then . . . then his brows twitched in longing? Understanding? Or . . . oh what was that word?

Whatever.

It didn’t matter. What mattered was his answer. And you already knew it before you’d spoken those words. 

OK, he nodded. 

OK, he smiled. 

OK, your eyes seemed to glisten back.

OK.

There was a time in your life, where every night you’d have the same nightmare. Over and over again, you’d be trapped in this room with no windows, no doors, just darkness. And in the middle of the room would be you, or rather a version of you, strapped to a chair, with flames slowly licking up your legs, scorching your skin. But you wouldn’t feel any pain, because it wasn’t actually you. Sure, it looked like you, but . . . you were on the other side of the room, watching with wide eyes as you heard yourself scream and beg to be released from the shackles. 

The flames wouldn’t touch you there. They were around, yes. They were burning holes into your clothes, yes, but you couldn’t feel it. All you could do was sit and watch as this variant of yourself burned alive right before your eyes.

And as if watching yourself be scorched alive wasn’t bad enough, there would be this point in the dream where you, no, she, no . . . it . . . would speak to you. Through the flames, it would hiss and whisper that it was your fault. 

It was your fault, and you’d know what it meant. 

But, No! you’d scream back. Because, no, no, no, this couldn’t be your fault. You couldn’t have been the one to ruin yourself. That would just be so, so, so . . . well . . . it would be too much.

(You knew now that it was just one big accident. Sure, trying not to blame yourself for it now was hard, but you’d learned in the past few months. It hadn’t been your fault. It hadn’t been his either.)

But back then . . . back then the incident loomed over your shoulder like a ghost.

You were getting ahead of yourself again, but . . . but the dream, no . . . the nightmare always started and ended the same. You stuck in a burning room, left to watch yourself burn and burn and burn as you, she, it, whatever (!) screamed and screamed, its voice growing louder with each, it was your fault!

And with the last shift of blame, the fire would finally set in. The red, hot flames that had left blisters and boils on your skin would begin to itch, then sting, and then consume you until all you felt was pain, pain, pain.

Then it would be your screams which filled the room.

Only when the pain would begin to shift, your back ripping with agony as this pair of . . . wings (?) split from the wounds, would you think you’d been saved. Because just as those wings had appeared, on the other side of the room, so had a door. And perhaps, perhaps then you could escape the burning room; fly out of there and save yourself. 

That was always your first thought: survive, and you would always head for the door without a second thought. It was only when you’d hear the other you’s screams that this immense amount of guilt would hit you, because there you were, able to save yourself but not without leaving a piece of you behind to burn to ash. 

. . . You never turned around to give yourself one last glance either. Instead, you always counted to three before you stepped off from the ledge, trusting that what was behind the bright light coming from the door would surely save you. And every time as you realized you were falling and falling, the heat would leave your senses and all you’d be able to feel was wind in your hair and the smell of salt water. You were no longer in the burning room. You were free.

With the opening of your eyes, you would be in the sky, your wings carrying you. And for a moment, you would believe that you truly were free; free from the incident, free from your guilt, free from everything.

Until the wind no longer felt refreshing and the vague smell of burning wood could be sensed; until you finally glanced back at what you had left behind, only to realize the wings you had been gifted were not made of feathers and bone at all, but rather wax, and under the Sun’s embrace . . . they had begun to melt . . . 

You’d spare yourself the details of stating what happened next, but the story was simple. Think Icarus. Just like Icarus, every time, your wings would melt and you’d hit the sea below you, shortly drowning but never dying. No, every time you’d get a bit closer to death . . . but you’d wake up just before you succumbed to it.

And every time you’d wake in a fright, sweat coating your body as you panted and panted, trying to figure out if you could still feel the fire on your skin or the water in your lungs. And every time you’d wake wondering if that was why you craved the fire so viscerally; if that was why you felt like you were drowning from time to time.

But . . . that dream, that nightmare . . . well . . . you hadn’t had it for a couple weeks or maybe months (?) now. It used to be something that you just considered part of your routine; something that you just had to deal with. But ever since you and Jungkook had begun this little thing you guys had going on where you’d sleep next to each other almost every night, you hadn’t been having any dreams. 

You didn’t quite understand it. You just knew that the nightmares had stopped . . . and maybe you had him to thank for that (just a little bit).

Slowly, you brought yourself out of your mind, planting yourself in reality once again as you were reminded that you and Jungkook had gone back to his hotel room after you got in a few hours practice after well . . . after your little . . . mishap. You’d showered and washed your hair, brushed your teeth, and blah blah blah. You were already tucked into bed, waiting for Jungkook to finish up brushing his teeth so the two of you could watch something to fall asleep to. (He was slow . . . of course (brushing his teeth while listening to a playlist at max volume)). And you, you were beginning to doze off, lost in your mind as you thought of the peaceful sleep you had awaiting you (partially thanks to him yeah (!) you knew . . . whatever).

Still, you couldn’t help but roll over in bed, your eyes quickly catching a glimpse of him in the mirror just outside the bathroom. And well, you couldn’t help but laugh just a little as you watched him dance to the music playing from his phone, haphazardly brushing his teeth along to the beat. (You couldn’t wait until he hopped into bed next to you and you could finally get close enough to feel his heartbeat against your cheek (not that you would admit that out loud. . . right?)).

“I can see your asscrack,” you called out across the room, laughing slightly because duh you were lying but you couldn’t help but tease him. (Plus . . . maybe a part of you missed him being beside you (you wanted him to hurry up, could you blame yourself?!).)

“Nuh-uh—” he gurgled out through the copious amount of toothpaste in his mouth— “not falling for that again. You’re full of shit.”

You couldn’t help but laugh again, falling back against the bed, the back of your head now laying in the center of the pillow. One, two, three, you counted the swirls in the ceiling. It was literally like watching paint dry having to entertain yourself until he was done. It was an odd thing, wasn’t it? Liking someone’s company that much?

God . . . what had you turned into?

“Do you sleep with your eyes open?” you heard Jungkook ask from beside you just as the bed dipped and he crawled under the covers, no shirt and only in his boxers (as usual).

Ignoring the pitter-patter of your heart, you turned to face him, your eyes immediately trailing across his features. “You tell me,” you hummed, quickly rolling onto your side so your entire body was facing him.

“Probably,” he mumbled as he settled into the bed, propping up the pillow to support his head. “Dunno though. I try not to look at you too much.”

Your jaw dropped. Then a scoff. And you didn’t waste any time, reaching forward to twist his nipple . . . hard.

Instantly, he caved in on himself, clutching his chest as he whined, “Ow. Not cool, baby.”

You threatened to do it again, your hand outstretched.

But he waved a metaphorical white flag in surrender. “OK. OK. I’m kidding. I’m kidding,” he all but begged, twisting away from you.

Falling back against the bed once again, you avoided his eyes. “That’s what I thought,” you huffed, crossing your arms over your chest as you faked your displeasure with him. 

Jungkook only found this amusing, soothing a hand over his chest before he shifted closer to you, his tattooed arm thrown over your waist as he pulled you into him. It took him no time to bury his face into the crook of your neck, nuzzling his nose just under your sweet spot. “Mmm, don’t be mad,” he mumbled against your skin, slowly kissing his way up to your ear. “You really are the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.” A kiss to your cheek. Then a squeeze to your side as he brought you closer and closer and closer until you were sure the two of you were intertwined. “You always have been, you know?”

Slowly, as confusion and shock twisted onto your features, you turned your head so you were nose to nose. “Don’t be silly,” you whispered as one of your hands found its way into his long hair. “I know you were kidding, you don’t have to overkill it.”

Listen, listen, listen . . . you knew you weren’t god awful, but every girl feels like they’re not good enough. It’s built into us, so sometimes it comes as a shock when someone is so . . . so forward. It wasn’t like people just went around saying ‘oh, you’re the prettiest girl ever duh!’ like duh! Obviously! So . . . 

But Jungkook always managed to surprise you. Always.

And just as you were about to close your eyes, thinking this was over and the two of you were going to actually get some sleep, he surprised you once more. “You know . . . “ he began, his voice low and quiet, almost as if he were fighting with himself to say his next words . . . “I spent the entirety of the sixth grade learning every flower I could just so I’d have something to tease you about,.”

“What?” you all but snorted as you threw your leg over his hip. “That’s insane.”

“Well, I had to get your attention somehow,” he mused, while his hand had begun to trace letters or random doodles on your back.

Scrunching your brows together, you asked, “What are you talking about?”

“You’re so dense. Pretty, but—” he tapped a finger to your forehead— “hollow.”

Instantly, you shot him a look. “You wanna talk?”

He only laughed.

A beat of warm silence. You traced his bottom lip with your thumb, toying with the piercing. He nipped at your thumb. Another beat. He pressed a kiss to your thumb. One more beat, then . . . 

“I had a crush on you, idiot,” he confessed against your thumb in the dead of night.

This time you actually did snort, moving your thumb to rest on his chin. “What? I was all braces and forehead acne,” you went on, remembering who you were and how you were and all the little things that you wished had been different about yourself back then. “A crush, JK? Be serious.”

“Hey, hey, I’m not a liar,” he quickly rushed over, humorously defending his honor. “I had a crush on you. Seriously. Why do you think I tried to impress you all the time.”

Your smile nearly faded. (And Jimin’s words revisited you (you pushed them away).)

He wasn’t kidding.

But . . . 

“Impress me? You spent our entire childhood showing off how much better you were at everything than I was,” you said, confusion and everything in between laced in your words. Because, truly, what? “That was like our . . . thing as much as it disgusts me to admit.”

His brows raised ever so slightly. “What?”

Oh no.

No, he wasn’t kidding. He actually did have a crush on you. But that meant . . . that meant the whole reason you had hated him growing up was over . . . nothing. He had never meant to start anything. He was just . . . he was trying to impress you and not . . . one-up you. 

He wanted you to like him back . . .

So then you had—oh, no!

“Wait,” you cut your own thoughts off with a gasp. “Oh my fucking god, are you serious? Kook, I thought you were just trying to be an asshole.”

Jungkook pulled back. “No, what the—” his words died on his tongue as it all dawned on him. “Is that why you thought I hated you?”

“Yes! Obviously!”

“Oh, shit . . . “

And then . . . as if this couldn’t get any more on-brand for the two of you, Jungkook had begun to laugh. Quietly at first, then his hand was slapping against his face as he cackled, his shoulders even so much as shaking. He was full-on laughing. Laughing.

“Why are you laughing?” you exclaimed, squeezing his shoulder

“Because! You hated my guts for like fifteen years and it’s all because you took my sixth-grade flirting as an insult!” he bursted out through small laughs. “You—” he embraced you, his hand cupping your cheek as his eyes searched yours— “are something else.”

“Well . . . it’s technically your fault,” you responded with a quick click of your tongue.

His brows twitched upward. “Oh, is it technically my fault?” he asked while trying to fight the half-grin tipping onto his lips.

“Obviously.”

“Mmm,” he hummed, thinking for only a second before: “At least you’re pretty.”

In response, your mouth fell open slightly. “I will bite the tip of your penis off.”

“Mmm, kinky,” he remarked as he nudged your nose with his.

Scrunching your nose, you tsked, “Ew.”

“Come on, baby,” Jungkook mockingly whined, pouting as much as he possibly could. “No cold shoulder. Gives me the chills.”

But you were having too much fun with this to give it up now. “You had a crush on me,” you all but gagged as you turned your nose up (once again ignoring Jimin’s words . . . ). “Disgusting.”

“Is it?” he questioned in amusement, moments before his lips were on your exposed jaw.

“Mmm.”

Jungkook gently bit your cheek. “I think you’re the one with the crush,” he mused, his lips trailing down to your neck again, this time hovering just over your sweet spot.

“Oh, please,” you scoffed, trying your absolute hardest not to show how affected you were by just his lips grazing your skin. But one gentle kiss to your sweet spot, and you could feel your heart skyrocket to your throat as you all but choked in a breath. It was just that . . . he had this effect on you. (Fuck, did he ever . . . )

“Begging now, are you?” he remarked before leaving another kiss here and then there and the oh, you guessed it, just on the corner of your mouth but not on your lips, of course.

And all you could do was admit you were weak when it came to him, and just give in. Which was, of course, what you did as a soft groan escaped your lips and you turned your head to face him once again. “Would you get over your ego and kiss me?” you deadpanned, all but pouting at him.

That almost got him immediately. His eyes flicked to your lips, then your eyes, then to your lips once again before one of those cocky grins plastered across his face. “Yes, ma’am,” he whispered, his voice like silk.

That was the last response you received before his lips grazed yours. Gentle at first was his touch, like a feather on skin, but as he nudged your nose with his, he finally closed the space between you two, pressing his lips against yours in a soft kiss. You leaned closer, pleasantly sighing into the kiss as you nipped at his bottom lip. A grin tipped onto his face before he dipped in for more, running his tongue along the crease of your lips. You complied quickly, hands tangling in his long, dark hair as you pulled him closer and melded his tongue with yours. He inhaled sharply through his nose as his grip tightened on you instantly, his hand sliding up your thigh, squeezing your hip before it snuck under the hem of your shirt (or rather his old college badminton tee that he had grown out of by now (which meant it was yours by default . . . duh).

A soft mix between a gasp and a quiet moan escaped your lips when you felt the coolness of his hand graze the swell of your breast, palming it. He grinned into the kiss, circling his thumb around your nipple, knowing damn well that it would get to you and have your skin blazing in seconds. 

That was just the thing—he knew how your body worked. More . . . he knew how you worked and perhaps that was why he had figured out how to pleasure you.

Still, you tugged on his hair in annoyance, huffing slightly and pouting perhaps just a tad, which you knew he found endearing. That was the thing, too . . . you knew how he worked as well. He snickered against your lips, proving your thoughts to yourself just moments before he pulled you closer and began sucking on your bottom lip as his thumb pressed down on your puckered nipple, tweaking the bud. You hummed softly in response, grinding your underwear-clothed core against his muscular thigh.

He stilled under your touch for a mere second before his hands gripped your waist as he pulled you down onto his thigh, moving with you while you grinded against him. “Making a mess, pretty girl,” he murmured against your lips as he moved to lightly kiss your neck. His hand was at your shirt again in an instant, fisting it and pulling it up over your breasts.

“You’re such a guy,” you nearly moaned out, your hands now on his shoulders as his head dipped to your breasts, catching a nipple in his mouth all the while he flexed his thigh against your core. He didn’t stop there either. He softly hummed against your skin as he released your nipple long enough to kiss it just moments before taking it into his mouth again, swirling his tongue around the bud and sucking hard. And you couldn't help it, you jerked against him, throwing your head into the pillow as a loud moan sounded from the back of your throat.

“So you agree—” he mumbled as he still flicked his tongue over and over again over the abused bud— “you like that about me?”

Before you could even answer, his hand had gone from your waist and now tangled in your hair, holding the back of your neck. That was moments before his lips detached from your puckered bud and reattached to your lips. His other hand worked quickly, too, as he slid his thigh out from underneath you and swung your leg over his hip, his hardened length now pressed against your aching core.

“Maybe I do a little,” you whispered with a small grin playing on your puffy lips as you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him in closer.

He grinned back. “You’re so beautiful,” he murmured back, kissing you quickly before you could respond.

And his comment was long forgotten as he grinded his bulge into your heat, stimulating both you and him. It was intoxicating. No, he . . . he was.

He was so intoxicating, you couldn’t help but whine out, “Take them off, please.” Your fingers were at his boxers, tracing the elastic band as you all but whimpered against his lips. You just wanted him, him, him. All of him.

“Eager?” he mused as his thumb dug into your hip. (You knew this was eating at him just as much as it was eating at you. It always did.)

“Please, Kookie. Can’t take it,” you whined further, all but straight-up riding him to scratch the ache inside you. “Need it so bad. Killin’ me.”

“Fuck,” he groaned, and he didn’t waste another second either. “Love you like this.” His own whines filled the air as the two of you struggled to tear off his boxers, your underwear quickly following after as both the undergarments eventually became lost under the covers. But neither of you cared.

It was a quick descent after that. You couldn’t help but grind your core over his hard length, the sound of your wet arousal evident even over the hum of the air conditioner. The two of you never did this. You’d always done foreplay after foreplay after foreplay, finding it thrilling to tease each other, but right now . . . right now all you wanted was him inside you. You wanted him as close as possible, and it seemed he wanted the same, the both of you unable to think or do anything other than grind against each other. 

Only then when you couldn’t take the throb between your legs anymore did he press a single kiss to the corner of your mouth before you felt him slowly enter you, inch by inch sinking into your cunt. Your eyes fluttered closed as your mouth parted and your head tilted back while you basked in the fullness which came along with his cock sliding snugly against your tight walls. Your breath hitched in your throat just as you felt him bottom out, your core taking him all the way until the hilt.

The next second, you were wrapping your legs around him, locking them together in an attempt to get him even deeper. Your eyes fluttered open next, meeting his gaze instantly as he stared down at you with his brows pinched in pleasure and those big, round eyes of his blown out . . . but was this lust that he gazed at you with? His gaze appeared different, almost warmer, almost softer, almost too soft to touch . . . to have . . . to hold. He looked too pretty like this. Definitely too pretty for you to handle.

It didn’t help when the following words out of his mouth were: "You're always so fucking tight.”

And then he began to move, not breaking eye contact once. No, his eyes watched yours as his cock pumped in and out of your wet heat. His breath hit your face, and you could almost feel his heartbeat against your chest, syncing with yours as the two of you stared into what you could only describe as each other’s souls.

It was odd, too, because while whatever this feeling was blooming in your chest scared you, you couldn’t look away. You couldn’t turn from him. You just wanted him, him, him. Always him. You feared that if you did turn away, when you glanced back he wouldn’t be there anymore. And that perhaps scared you more than anything: losing him.

But there he was. He was always right there . . . 

Almost as if he could hear your thoughts, his grasp on you tightened, his cock sinking deliciously deeper if it were even possible. The pressure in your lower stomach was becoming too much as it bloomed and bloomed, twisting and turning in a pleasurable ache. You bit your bottom lip, turning your head to the side as your breathing became more uneven by the second, but not once did you dare look away. No, you watched each and every twitch of his brow, every shaky breath, every flutter of his eyelashes, and you relished in it, soaking it all in. 

It became clear to you that you couldn’t look away even if you tried.

And it seemed neither could he . . . 

"Why are you looking at me like that?" you rasped out, trying to swallow your spit.

Jungkook nudged your nose with his. "Like what?"

You swallowed, this time harder (Jimin’s words revisited you once again). “I can’t say . . . “

His brows twitched this time. “How could I not?”

How could I not? And you knew what he meant, just as he had known what was playing on your mind. How could I not?

And then he was kissing you again, taking you by utter surprise. Sure, the two of you had had sex over and over again and each time felt a little different from the other, but this . . . this was like the beginning yet the present all at once. It was like you could feel all of him in just this kiss; like you could see his past and he could see yours and neither of you had thought about running once. 

It was soft. So was his hand as he brushed through your hair as he kissed you, tracing your hairline, your cheek, your jaw, then your neck as if he were trying to map out your features. 

(You couldn’t help but melt under his touch.)

Why was his kiss always the softest thing you had ever known?

Then . . . amidst your soft moans and carnal sounds, he pulled back, his eyes finding yours again. He glanced between the two of you where your bodies met, brows rising in marvel as he released a small sigh before rolling his hips against yours again and again. And then . . . then, he grabbed your hand, intertwining your fingers together as his gaze met yours once again and he whispered so quietly, almost too quiet you wouldn’t have heard it if you hadn’t been so close, “I don’t even know where you end and I begin.”

And you knew instantly he didn’t just mean where your body met his. No, this was deeper, and you realized he could feel that this time was different, too.

Swallowing hard, you fluttered your eyes in almost a state of shock as you stayed silent. But you didn’t need to speak. No, you took his words, and you held them close, and then you were holding him. Take my bones and build yourself a home, he’d told you, but no, no, you wouldn’t put him through that. He could take yours. He could take all of you. You would give yourself to him.

Fuck, you would give all of yourself to him. Only him. Him, him, him.

“Wanna see your face, baby,” he murmured as he brushed your hair out of your flushed face. “Prettiest girl I’ve ever seen. My pretty girl.”

And you knew that was it.

With one final kiss, you let him know all this, allowing him to take the lead once more. Everything pulsed as he picked up a sensual pace, hitting your sweet spot over and over again as his thumb snuck between your legs, skillfully working against your swollen clit while you chased the coil. It tightened and tightened, rings of pleasure hissing in your ears. His thumb quickened its pace, and then the coil snapped, your release crashing over you. All you could do was surrender to it, tilting your head back into the pillow as your hips raised while your hands squeezed his toned arms. All the while, Jungkook continued the long drags of his cock against your walls, dragging out your orgasm for as long as he could.

“Wanna stay like this,” he confessed, his thrusts growing slower and slower, unsteadier and unsteadier as he nearly whimpered into your neck. “Love this so fuckin’ much. Being with you—fuck. You make me feel so good, baby. So good.”

“I’d let you,” you mumbled against the shell of his ear, your voice a little too hoarse as you were still coming down from your high. “I’d let you do . . . all the time . . . I want—” you were delirious at this point and you knew it, too— “Want you always.”

Your words barely even registered in your brain as pleasure and that blooming feeling in your chest consumed you. It wasn’t long before you found yourself lifting his head so your lips could slot against his. And he graciously accepted your offer, consuming you just as the feeling had done.

The two of you wasted no time in escalating from gentle kissing, allowing you to further calm down from your high before your cunt was throbbing once more. And . . . before his cock had begun to feel too fucking hard inside you, nearly twitching for release as it begged for your addictive touch. 

You let yourself get wrapped up in him for a little longer, too, never wanting to stop. Your hands were on him again as you tangled your fingers in his hair and pulled. This time a loud, deep groan came from his lips, and you knew you had him. He gave another groan of submission when you tugged again, his thrusts barely cohesive now. He was close, and you reveled in this, wishing to bring him to ecstasy. With that thought on your mind, you devilishly reached over his muscular ass, fingers quickly finding his perineum and pressing into it, massaging the sensitive spot.

He was sheathed deeper inside you before either of you could breathe, the two of you too wrapped up in each other to move positions. You just wanted to feel each other again and again and again, because for some reason . . . this time was different.

Different and yet all the same. That was how it had always been with Jungkook.

And you couldn’t quite put a word to the feeling, until . . . 

“Will you cum inside me?” you whispered, your voice hoarse as you omitted a soft moan under your breath. “Please. I need more.” Swallowing hard, you finally met his gaze, and instantly, you couldn’t look away. There was just . . . something . . . there. “I need you.” Your brows furrowed as you soaked in your own words while you searched his eyes. 

Slowly, with another roll of his hips, he sank lower, his abdomen grazing against yours so he could be close enough to brush his lips with yours but not that close to kiss you. But you . . . you couldn’t be without his touch, and found yourself tilting your head to press your lips against his, finally finding that something you had been searching for in his eyes. 

And then . . . then it hit you.

“I need you,” you heard yourself whisper before you knew the words had left your mouth. “I need you, Koo.”

I need you, you’d whispered, and you began to realize . . . you knew what you felt for him wasn’t what you’d feel for a friend. Because you did need him . . . in more ways than you’d like to admit.

And that scared the shit out of you.

taglist:

@hrts4kook , @taehyungs-chopsticks , @loomipee , @st3ft0n3s , @callmenada , @neg-l3ct , @dawn33 , @illegurlbangtan , @jeonsdetails , @rihabaxl , @yoongipost , @jjk1iscoming , @miumiugurl , @sadgirlroo , @lucwithbangtan , @iamsisuu , @shanelleeex , @beonim , @sherlynxx , @fairy1919 , @purplewhales , @bloopkook , @ggukcanim , @bloodline1632 , @jungkooksseuphoria , @tea4sykes , @mugiwaraelly , @darkuni63 , @jalexad , @lpgirl2324 , @fairy-jaykay , @h0tvillainap0logist , @stuffy16 , @keniicastillo , @yoongukie-ff , @seesawe , @chocolatesublimesoul , @yopjm , @jeonlovescoffee , @xmirvamx , @jk-190811 , @percyjacksonlovesannabethchase , @vminkookgf , @werxyz , @tornparts , @aprilspring , @kswr1d , @jimilter , @02010802 , @sunsetnamjin​ , @lonekittycat , @moonchild1 , @hanamgi , @yoongslast , @heronstairsxd @pointofviewyugyeom

Mutual Help | #57

↳ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; in order for you to pretend to be his girlfriend, he helps you with your sexual desires ⏤ he calls it mutual help

⇢ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: jungkook x reader

⇢ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fake dating au, fluff, angst, smut, slow burn

⇢ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: explicit language, mature content

⇢ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 10.2k+

⇠ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯. | 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐱 | 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ⇢ 

When you truly think about it, you've probably let Jungkook in in more ways than one. Being in his presence is tempting. He is a temptation that messes up with your head. It is one of the reasons why you think the so-called break has been a smart decision. But he's not all that. He is still the same Jungkook whose presence is comforting. It's times like these when you're reminded of how much you love your friends. 

Catching up with him and talking about how the day has been for each of you, isn't something new. There's not that much that has changed. You only stopped fucking each others brains out. Though, you hate how much you already miss it. And you shouldn't feel like this. But you also don't want to overthink anything, or keep your mind busy with something that's probably better not to think about. 

Your dreams have been wild, the only time where you actually go back to how things were. Not all of them though. Maybe two or three since the camping trip and your decision. 

Despite the inner struggles, Jungkook is your comfort person. Oddly enough, even though he's in the center of your thoughts, he brings you the biggest peace and comfort. 

Tonight wasn't planned.

Luckily, you're always prepared when it comes to unplanned visits. All three of them love to surprise you (not that you mind), so your cupboard is never without at least one bottle of wine. Not being a much of a drinker yourself on casual evenings, you still suggest having a glass or two. 

Jungkook agrees. After reminding you of him having to drive back home, you suggest him staying over. He agrees again. Maybe him staying overnight might not be the best for your hormones, you are forced to believe in yourself. Isn't this the whole purpose of this? To go back to just being friends, the ones you've been two years ago?

When you think about those times, you think of happiness. Surrounded by the greatest friends you could've ever asked for. 

“Mind opening it?” 

Jungkook looks up, finding you standing in your kitchen with a bottle of wine in your hand, a wine opener in the other. Standing up, he goes to help you without any words but there's a slight amused smirk on his lips when you hand him everything. 

You share a look, not forgetting to playfully roll your eyes at him. 

“So many bottles of wine and still can't open any of them.” he teases you, hinting at all the wine one of them had to open.

“Listen,” you muse, “You guys always whine about wanting to drink wine.”

“That's not true,” he laughs, knowing that he's bluffing. “We would drink anything.” he adds, which holds some truth to it for sure. 

Feigning irritation, you motion for him to hurry. You watch him attentively, leaning yourself against a kitchen counter while he puts those muscles to work. He cuts the foil below the lower lip of the bottle, showing you how easy it is with a teasing tilt to his brow. Trying to hold back your laugh, you purse your lips instead before he inserts the screw in the center of the cork. He rotates it a few times, you're not sure because his eyes are on you.

“You're so cocky.” you comment, his brows shooting up as he lets out an audible laugh. 

“What? I am not,” he argues, laughing. “You're just too amusing to look at.”

He levers cork, at least he tries to because it seems to be stuck. It's going harder than usual, which you can tell from all the times you had the opportunity to see a similar scene. His brows furrow and lips press into a thin line. 

You cackle, “Maybe you got too cocky, buddy.”

“Shut up.” he mutters, his muscles bulging as a pop sound resounds, signaling the cork is levered successfully. 

Maybe not so much, because in a seconds the wine spills around Jungkook, staining his shirt as well. You gasp, a hand over your mouth as you two share a look. Bursting out laughing, you shake your head. 

“What did I say, too cocky.”

“Would you do it better?” he challenges, causing your grin to drop as your eyes narrow.

He puts the bottle down, the wine opener already in your sink as you grab a few kitchen paper towels and dry off all the spilled wine. Luckily, it's just a few droplets and no disaster is made. However, Jungkook's shirt has suffered the most. His entire white shirt is filled with dark red spots, turning purple from the wine's color. 

He sighs in a slight annoyance, easily grabbing the back of his shirt as he effortlessly pulls it over his head. Almost choking on your spit, you try to not react too much as you quickly throw away the wet paper into the bin. But you straighten yourself too quickly, almost bumping into Jungkook's chest as you stare wide-eyed at him. He looks down on you, confused by your almost panic-struck face. 

“What? Already too nervous at the sight of my chest?” he jokes, wiggling his eyebrows at you.

You purse your lips, trying to play it cool as you chuckle. “You got naked all of a sudden. You just caught me off guard.”

“Is this me naked?” he laughs, “Come on.”

“You know what I meant.” you say through clenched teeth, poking him in his stomach, ignoring how hard it feels. “Besides,” you start, gulping. “Break, remember?” 

“I just took my shirt off,” he laughs, throwing his head back as you're met with his soft dimples and white toothy grin. “You never minded it before.”

“I never fucked you before, did I?” You lean yourself against the counter once again, hand gripping the edge of it tightly. 

Jungkook notices it, his amusement not so hidden behind the little twitch of his lips. Eyes back on you, they dance across your soft and slightly panicked features. “Am I that irresistible?”

“Cocky again?” you shoot right back, not giving him that pleasure of confirming his thoughts and feeding his ego. But he knows. One look at you and he seems to know it all. 

You make a mistake by allowing your eyes to drop, first at his lips and they disobediently trace down his chest, muscles and then the deep V-line. Oh fuck, you want this man . You mentally scream at yourself and throw hands, definitely disappointed in yourself. He's barely doing anything and you're ready to drop down on your knees.

“What's the point of taking a break, if we can't control ourselves?” you ask out loud, not quite sure if those words are only aimed at Jungkook, or you're letting your consciousness speak out loud. 

He watches you for a moment, getting closer and you stumble back, awkwardly getting back to your previous spot as he tries to hold back a laugh. It's not your fault your body is reacting! And your mind panicked. 

“Don't know about you, but I can control myself.” he says.

“You can?” you ponder.

“Mhm,” he nods, “Otherwise I would kiss you by now.”

“Kook!” you exclaim, already panting at those words as he gives you a smile. You don't look long enough to detect what kind.

“I would.” He's not ashamed to admit it. 

You watch him wet his lips. They look inviting. Automatically, your mind replays many times you've got to taste them, actually more than that. Your entire body feels hot, too hot in this small kitchen and you don't know whether to scream or cry.

“Break, remember?” he reminds you, a smirk dancing all over those damn lips and stunning features. He brushes past you, the stained shirt gripped in his hold as he makes his way to your bathroom.

You don't move. You can't.

All you muster to do is gulp all the saliva that have collected in your mouth, touching your hot cheeks with the back of your hand. Letting out a loud exhale, you ignore your strong heartbeat that feels like it's in your neck.

Quickly grabbing the two glasses for you and him, you ignore the sharp ringing sound. Suddenly, you're desperate for the wine – very happy about your friends insisting to have one at your place at all times. 

Perhaps, wine is not what you're desperate for at all.  

This is exactly what you were talking about.

Among all the things that are going against the morality of any friendship, thinking of Jungkook a certain way feels forbidden. And it should be. Maybe it is a little dramatic because it's not like you spend every minute of your day, thirsting over your best friend. But you've caught yourself thinking of him a few times a day. 

Just a few days after you came back from the trip, Maya visited your place for the first time. In fact, she sat on the exact spot where Jungkook is sitting right now. At first, you never felt like bothering her with your stupid shit, especially when she's in the middle of planning her wedding while working every day like a normal human being. 

But you couldn't take it. 

You wanted to take things off your mind, undoubtedly connected to only one person who's closest to you. Now in more ways than two years ago. 

However, you did want to get things off your chest as well and eventually, you've found your way back to him.

“I think I made a bad decision.” you told her when the topic Jungkook started.

Now, Maya might be the person who absolutely understands the craving and temptation he brings inside you, but she has also become your best friend whom you can share your inner battles with. 

“I shouldn't feel this way.”

“First of all, I think it might be a good decision to stop thinking of what should and shouldn't feel right. You're overthinking it.” she told you, ignoring your slightly offended look you sent her way. 

“He's my best friend.” you gritted through your teeth, suddenly growing overwhelmed with those thoughts again.

Deep down, you know you made the right decision. You know the reason why you made it in the first place. Yet, here you are, regretting it.

“Y/N, honey,” Maya's silky and comforting voice caught your attention. She angled her body toward you, leaning her head against her palm. “That feeling of… wanting him is not gonna go away with a snap of fingers.”

You frowned. You frowned for a while while she let you ponder in silence.

“I did it so we could focus on being friends. No intimacy.” you almost whispered, nibbling on your bottom lip. 

“And it's okay still wanting him to bend you over and fuck you.”

“Maya!”

You both laughed, the girly laugher filling your once quiet and sad place.

“It's okay to have regrets. Just go with the flow.”

That's the last thing she advised you before you asked her about the wedding. She advised you something you and Jungkook did – and look where it brought you.

Luckily for your sake, Jungkook has had a shirt in one of your drawers, the result of him staying at your old place a few times. Actually, you're sure there are a few Taehyung's things in one of your drawers as well.

Gulping down your nerves with your wine, you naturally grow warm and relaxed. You barely pay any attention to the movie, focusing on how Jungkook's shoulder and side of his body feels… nice. You tend to get sleepy and cuddly (among other things) when tipsy. You're on your third glass of wine, nowhere near drunk but the exhaustion of today has caught up to you. 

Jungkook's legs are outstretched, resting on your coffee table which you used to scold him for. Even though you often caught yourself doing the very same thing. Is it fair to scold someone for things you do as well?  

“Kook?” 

“Hm?” The soft, yet husky hum resounds from the man beside you, his hands resting on his stomach. 

“What do you think about… the break ?” You cringe at giving it a proper name.

Though, Jungkook understands what you mean. He's quiet for a moment and when you lift your head up, you see his confused expression before his eyes settle down on you.

“Because you never told me what you think.”

Staring at him, you notice his hair is longer than the last time you've seen him. It's not been that long ago, yet you notice the small change. You wonder if he's going to grow it out like last time. 

“Why you asking? Already regretting it, hm?” he teases, nudging you a little as your cheeks heat up. 

“What? No!” It sounds like a proper lie and your throat tightens. 

Whether Jungkook knows it or not, he decides not to tease you any further as his eyes focus on the screen of your television once again. 

“I don't know what I think of it,” he responds after a while. “You told me the reason behind it and I respect it.”

“But do you agree with it?”

“Where is this coming from?” he frowns, though it's soft and confusing, just like your little and sudden integration is. 

“Can you just answer?” you ask in annoyance. 

“Yeah, I agree with it.” He says, “Maybe we got carried away too much.”

He leans forward, causing your head no longer leaning against him as he grabs his glass of wine and takes a few sips of it before getting back to his previous position. This time, you're watching him attentively. Your head leaned against the couch while the movie goes completely ignored. You watch the dark liquid in his glass, swirling it around.

Did you get carried away too much? 

The only thing that changed was the fact you were having sex. Okay . Plus the never-ending thirst and temptation. Jungkook has shown you a different side of sex, something you've never experienced before. Perhaps, that's the reason why it felt so hard to let go. 

And you panicked. With the events that happened lately, you felt like you wanted to go back to when none of this happened. But were your arguments happening because you were having sex? 

“Do you miss it?”

Jungkook's brows lift up as you earn another glance from him. “You asking me if I miss fucking you?”

Your face gets hot all over again. “When you put it like this…”

He chuckles, leaning his head back as he stares at the ceiling. “It's been like a week.” he informs you.

As if you don't know. And what a week it has been! 

You're just curious, blaming it on the wine because your thoughts are set free.

“I hope you know that when I look at you, sex isn't what I see.”

You look at him, ears perked up in attention as your heart flutters. “I know.” you whisper.

“I'm not Taehyung. I can go without sex.” he says, a loud snort rippling through your throat as you cover your mouth. He gives you an amused grin. 

A silence follows and your thoughts work. Actually, they never stopped and now the alcohol inside you just urges them on. 

“I had a sex dream of you.” 

Completely oblivious of Jungkook taking another sip, he chokes on the dark liquid as he straightens himself from his position, gulping before coughing. “Jesus, Y/N.”

You give him an amused grin. “It was hazy. It didn't feel like a proper dream, you know what I mean? I feel like I had five dreams that night.”

It's true. You had a dream with him. It was very brief, much to your disappointment it ended too soon.

“This makes me sound like I'm thinking with my dick only.”

“You have no dick, Y/N.” Jungkook reminds you, snickering. 

“You know what I mean.” you mutter in response. 

Jungkook settles down his wine. He's a little surprised to see you sitting up, watching him attentively as he leans back. “What?”

“Nothing, you look good.”

For the second time tonight, Jungkook almost chokes on his spit. Shaking himself out of the sudden shock, he clears his throat. “Are you flirting with me?”

“No,” you say like it's the clearest thing in the world. “Just saying.”

He frowns, eyeing you suspiciously. As if he can't quite figure out what's going on inside your head. “Are you drunk?”

Jungkook knows you and your limits. You're a little tipsy, so is he but you definitely seem to show it more than he is. 

“No.” 

You sigh, sitting onto your heels before briefly tracing the veins that adore Jungkook's hands and arms. Is it June night or has it suddenly gotten too warm?  

Jungkook catches you eyeing him, trying to hide his subtle smirk. He knows. “Break, remember?” 

“Mhm,” you hum, completely ignoring the little reminder. “What a stupid idea.”

“Okay, I think you're drunk.”

“No, I am not.” you argue, frowning at him as he watches you in complete amusement. “I've thought about it a lot.”

“Is the wine making you horny?” Jungkook questions. 

No, you do.  

Though, you keep your mouth shut. You ignore him. “I know why I made that decision…” you trail off. 

Jungkook raises his brow, waiting for you to continue. But? It's written all over his face.

“I miss you.”

He stares, blinking a few times. “You mean you miss my–”

“No, no. Maybe. I mean, no. You're not just that to me–” you quickly hurry to explain. 

The problem is, you're not sure how to explain whatever it is you want to say. Whatever you think of pours out of your mouth. Usually you have enough time to think of what you're about to say, but right now you're unhinged. Maybe it's the result of your own frustration.

He is patient. 

He's confused as fuck, well probably – at least you think so because his expression is neutral and he simply watches you, not ushering to explain or elaborate more. 

He watches your eyes dance across the space around him, until your eyes settle on him. Then wander over his body until you shamelessly eye his wet lips, tainted by wine a little. He knows that look. He has seen it on many occasions.

“I'm not drunk, I promise.” you suddenly tell him. “I know I make no sense right now but…”

“Tell me what you want,” he tells you simply. “What's going on inside that pretty head?”

And you almost fold immediately, cursing that mouth of his.

“Trust me, it's not that pretty right now.” you mutter.

He laughs, “I can imagine.”

Ignoring what's that supposed to mean , you shift on your spot. “I know I wanted a break, but what if we did this one last time?”

You hate how nervous you suddenly feel. Is it embarrassing to admit such a thing? The last time you had a sex it wasn't under great conditions. It was mind-blowing and definitely did the work, but still. 

Scooting closer to him, he attentively watches you as you lick your lips. “I mean… There's something I would like to try. And I trust you the most.”

Jungkook pulls his feet off the coffee table, setting them down on the floor as you make your way toward him. He lets you. He even helps you to sit down in his lap. Your hands are sprawled across his chest, slowly caressing the thin material as you feel his muscles under it. 

“You're finally gonna let me fuck this ass?” he asks, eyes hooded lazily as he grabs your ass and squeezes the soft flesh. 

Excitement floods your lower region, what could be considered as butterflies swirl inside your stomach. 

“Fuck no,” you breathe out, “You're not going anywhere near my ass.”

Jungkook pouts, cheeks tinted pink from the wine he has drank. “Shame.”

You giggle, “Just one more time.” you tell softly, inching closer as your lips hover over his. 

He breathes out, nose nudging yours. One thing is sure, alcohol sometimes makes both of you horny. You're not the type to go and look for a potential hook-up out there. And neither is Jungkook. At least you think so.

“You agree?”

“You're making this very hard for me, you know that, right?” Jungkook mutters, lips almost touching yours as his hold on your asscheeks tightens. 

“Why's that?” you hum, teasingly playing with his hair until your fingers caress the nape of his neck. 

“You just do,” he says before adding, “First you want a  break and now you're on my lap, giving me those eyes.”

“What eyes?” you play clueless, causing him to chuckle.

“Those fuck me eyes.”

“You said you wanted to kiss me in the kitchen.”

“I did.” he hums, agreeing. 

“You want this too, right?”

He looks up, lazily, eyes clouded with need and lust. 

Again. He is your comfort place. He is comfortable and being in a position like this – you've got no regrets and you want him. Even if it's for the last time for God knows how long. There's no telling if you're ever going back to hooking-up. Usually, that is the plan when there's a word break involved.

Fuck focusing on your friendship for now. What did Maya say? Go with the flow? 

“Yeah, but I don't want you to regret anything.”

“I'm never gonna regret this.”

You're not sure who moves first. Whether it's you or Jungkook, it doesn't matter. Your lips finally meet in a hard kiss, molding together as he deepens it. He kisses you, hard and needy, and you almost cry at that feeling. Fuck, you really did miss this. Before you can think of how wrong this might be, your want for him, you completely ignore it. Any possible morals are out of the window as you gasp into Jungkook's mouth.

He tastes like wine. You both do.

Eventually, you're forced to pull away to catch a breath. Jungkook's crotch underneath you hardens, informing you that he's aroused just as much as you are.

“What you had in mind?” he asks, voice raspy.

Pulling away with a smile, you turn off the television as you stretch your hand toward him. He watches you, slowly taking it as his big hand envelopes yours. He gets to his feet, his lean and hard body touching your side as you grow impatient. You lead him toward your bedroom, closing the door with a loud thud but not before turning off the lights in your living room. The bills are important, right? 

Jungkook stands at the edge of your bed before you swiftly push him, causing him to sit down with a tiny smirk. Ignoring the smug face, you stand between his legs. 

“Should I be worried?” he asks, hands on your hips as he caresses them. Trying not to swoon too much over that simple action, you pry his hands off you.

“Lay down.”

His brows raise momentarily. 

“I see.” he mutters knowingly. 

“Now.” you urge him, glaring at his smirk widening. “Wait.”

He cocks his brow at you.

“Take off the damn shirt.”

He chuckles, reaching behind him and tugging the shirt over his head. Fuck . Does he have to look attractive even while taking his shirt? God. Fucking hell. You did miss him. 

Tossing the shirt on the floor, he sits there watching you up and down as you just stand there and admire his figure. One he worked hard for, yet it paid off entirely.

Fucking wine.

Before you can demand another thing, he gives you one last look of amusement before he scurries further down your mattress. You watch him lay down, making himself comfortable on your pillows as he leans his upper body against the bed frame. What a sight he is. 

He watches you, silently and attentively, the entire time you get to your closet. You slide the door open, rummaging the bottom of it. His eyes are on you. You feel them on your back, watching your every move. While the fire that sits in the pit of your stomach, full of excitement, you pull out the item you've been looking for. 

Just as you slide the closet door closed and turn around to face him, you see his smirk drop as he stares genuinely taken back. Now it's your turn to smirk as you swirl the fluffy pink handcuffs Taehyung kindly gifted you around your point finger.

“Fuck no.”

The response is immediate. 

You get on the bed, taking the handcuffs with you of course. Jungkook watches you with a frown settled on both his face and lips. You get onto his lap, sitting right on top of his hardening cock. 

“Why not?”

“I'm not getting handcuffed.” he states, eyeing you carefully as you place them beside you and start caressing his naked chest. 

It's clear to say you want to be in control. It's debatable though. Whenever Jungkook has shown his dominant side when it came to sex, you were just as much in control. And you love and enjoy every second of him being in charge. This time, you want to be on top and play with him. Or maybe that sounds wrong. You want to give him pleasure, focus on him. To try something new. 

You get closer to Jungkook, kissing his sharp jaw as he clenches it, watching you carefully but not moving just yet. You're sly. He's reminded of you being a little minx. You continue your path down his neck, kissing his skin as his chest moves, breathing slow and steady. His chest is neck, you pepper the skin with soft kisses just as you stop below the hem of his jeans. 

He bites onto his lower lip harshly, meeting your gaze as you look up through your lashes. 

“Can I take them off?” you ask, talking about his jeans.

“You don't have to ask.”

You grin, reaching for the belt as you undo it. His button and zipper are next before Jungkook helps you to take off his jeans. 

“Just wanna make you feel good,” you tell him, eyeing his hardening and evident erection. “Can I make you feel good?”

“Fuck,” he sighs, looking up at the ceiling. “You wanna be in control, huh?”

“Yeah,” you nod, “What? You think I can't do it?”

His lips twitch. “No, no.” he assures you, though you're not sure if he's telling the truth.

Narrowing your eyes at him, you cup his bulge as you get on your knees, leaning down to his crotch. You palm him, his jaw clenched while you're trying not to moan at the feeling of his hard cock. Just the thought of pulling him out and having him inside you makes you wet. 

Giving him one last look, you momentarily stop before you lean down completely and press a kiss to where his tip is, on top of his briefs. 

“Fucking hell,” he gasps. “You're already teasing me.”

“What? No. I'm just taking my time.” you assure him cutely, smirking up at him which tells him otherwise. 

Before he can react, you lift yourself up and carefully straddle him. You reach for the handcuffs, ignoring the way his cock is almost digging into your own crotch. 

“Y/N.” he warns you.

You pout at him. “But why?” you almost whine. “You scared of handcuffs or what?”

“Keep talking and you're gonna be the one handcuffed.” 

“I promise I won't do anything bad.” 

He watches you, frowning and not totally sold on your idea. It definitely has something to do with his male ego. Jungkook is naturally dominant and while he had you on top multiple times, you never handcuffed him or showed this type of dominance. You reach for your oversized shirt, tugging it over your head as you expose your breasts to him. He gulps, watching the way they bounce from the single movement. Your nipples are already perked up, sensitive like always and perhaps, it's from the arousal as well. 

He goes to touch them, mindlessly and automatically. His mouth opens in shock when you slap his hand away, even though you want nothing more than for him to touch you. 

“What–”

“I wanna try this, Kook.” You're playing with him already. You pout and give him the puppy eyes, finger trailing down his abs. “You always asked what I want to try and this is one of them.”

He sighs, hand rubbing his forehead. “Fuck, okay.”

“Really?”

Jungkook almost smiles at how excited you sound. What the hell are you planning? 

In reality, you're just going with the flow. 

You reach for the handcuffs, knowing they're going to work well with your bed frame. You can easily handcuff both of Jungkook's hands. But just as you're about to reach for his hands, he automatically pulls away which causes you to give him a glare. He rolls his eyes, offering you his wrists. You sit on your knees, telling him to lay down completely. He does, with the same frown that makes you giggle under your breath. You take his wrists and bring them up to your bed frame.

Jungkook takes that time to watch you work on the handcuffs from below, feeling them wrapping around his wrists. Wanting to curse, he drifts his attention elsewhere and watches your breasts that are right above him.

You pull back with a successful and triumphal grin, watching him tugs onto them. While he mentally curses Taehyung for giving you such a stupid gift ever, you admire your work. You lean forward again, making sure they hold and Jungkook takes that time enveloping your nipple into his mouth. You gasp and flinch at the sudden feeling, pulling back to find smirking Jungkook.

“Couldn't resist,” he says cheekily.

Despite his current and clearly submissive position, he looks anything like it. He's here, your cheeks hot and heart beating fast. You don't think you'll ever grow tired of him showing his crave for you. You've said it multiple times in your head, but you've never felt wanted as much as you feel with Jungkook. 

“Well, then start resisting.” you say smartly, ignoring the smug face. “Stop looking so cocky, you bastard.” 

But he doesn't stop. He's smirking, looking at you because despite everything, he's in control. Frowning at that, even though you secretly love it, you stand up and get out of your pajama shorts. Revealing that you aren't wearing any underwear, Jungkook watches you hungrily, his head lifted thanks to the pillows under it. He's got a good view of you at the end of your bed. 

You smirk. Men. One look at a naked body and they fold. 

“Come here and sit that pussy on my mouth.”

Or not.

You give him a look, seeing him lazily lay there with his arms above his head. 

“You don't get to make demands.” you inform him, watching that smug face wipe away slowly. 

While you're completely naked, you sit on his calves and lean down to play with the hem of his briefs. 

“This is torture,” he informs you back. “This is exactly why I didn't wanna be in these fucking handcuffs.”

“Already complaining?” you throw back. 

He presses his lips into a tight line, keeping quiet. 

Torturing a little more, you hover him once more with lips dangerously close to his. “That's what I thought.”

He chases your lips but you pull away, giggling when you're met with the usual frown. 

Getting back to your position, you pull down his underwear. His cock springs free, shamelessly slapping against his abdomen before it stands upright. Minus the little facade that you have going on of planning to tease him, you're just as desperate to move further if not more. 

So you wrap your hand around the base of him, wrapping your lips around the tip as you taste his pre-cum. Jungkook sighs in delight, allowing himself to close his eyes in a sudden relief. You lick the underside of him, knowing what you have to do since you've done it multiple times before. This is nothing new, yet it still feels amazing each time. 

The handcuffs make a sound against the wooden frame, just as you let your mouth wrap around him some more, taking him deeper. The clank of them makes you look up, biting back a laugh when you see Jungkook's frustrated face. 

“What were you gonna do?” 

He growls, warning you not to tease him some more. Well, it surely isn't as much fun for him as it is for you, but that doesn't mean he can't enjoy it. It makes sense. This is the first time where Jungkook can't touch you because he's physically unable to. You understand the frustration, you do. With a silent promise, you make it worth it. 

Putting his cock inside your mouth, you hollow your cheeks and deliver him pleasure. Your hand and mouth works on him, and not even hair getting into your face stops you. You know if it weren't for Jungkook's hands not being available at the moment, he would wrap his hand around it, making sure it doesn't get in the way and he can see you.

“Mhm, yeah.” He mutters from above you, enjoying your mouth wrapped around him.

It's not enough, you know it isn't but you're not planning to make him cum. You've barely started and in order for him to enjoy this, there's more you want to do. You don't want to make it lame since this is your first time doing this. You're not going to lie. You like having him this… helpless. You enjoy it, it's a nice change from the usual cockiness.

You eventually pull away, making sure to suck him until the last minute. A trail of saliva connects the tip of his cock and your lips, causing you to wipe it with your thumb. He watches you the entire time with dark eyes, not questioning why you stopped. 

This time, he lets you be in control because you don't look like you're about to deny his orgasm and make him truly suffer. On the opposite, he stares at you attentively as you simply turn around and throw your leg over his chest, facing him with his back. 

“Fuck.” he curses silently from behind you, watching you lean forward to his cock once again. 

However this time, your ass and cunt are right in his face. He sees how wet you are, just that alone makes him smirk because he knows you won't be able to withhold your own pleasure for much longer. After all, it does make his ego bigger knowing you're affected. You're clueless to his inner thoughts, even though you do realize how wet you are, it doesn't even cross your mind, not even when the air hits your core.

It's not until you have Jungkook's cock back in your mouth when you suddenly feel his mouth on you. You don't expect the swipe of his tongue, gathering your juices which makes you flinch in surprise. Throwing him a glance across your shoulder, you're met with the same cockiness you've seen a handful of times. 

“Lemme eat this pussy out.” he almost begs.

“How am I supposed to focus then?” you question, the remains of wine causing you to speak your thoughts right away. 

His lips twitch. You give him no reaction though, letting it up to him as you turn around and arch your back. Jungkook is a menace. He gets what he wants either way, shameless as ever as his mouth envelopes your clit as he sucks. 

You gasp, leaning your forehead against his thigh while your hand stops working on his hard cock. For fuck sake. Frustration is what you feel because for a split second, you realize Jungkook is in control. He eats you out, your body and determination practically begging to be touched. Reminding yourself that this is not supposed to be totally about you, you force your hand to get to work. You're realizing you're not doing a half of a good job at delivering pleasure at the moment.

“Focus,” Jungkook says against your leaking cunt. You can imagine his mouth already being soaked in your juices, dripping it down his chest. Even the single imaginary sight of that makes you want to let out the biggest groan. “I thought you're great at multitasking.” 

Apparently not when it comes to this , you want to bite back but you can't. You simply cannot. It's like the moment Jungkook touches you, you're already gone. 

Somehow, after a moment of realization and determination yet again, you take him into your mouth. 

“That's it,” he groans against you, sending vibrations right to your core. The wet sounds coming from behind you create a sinful proof of your doings, ones you don't mind at all. 

You're close.

You can't focus. 

Not with Jungkook's mouth that skilfully slowly but surely brings you to your end. And then the cocky bastard opens his dirty mouth again, not minding what it's been doing, not even a bit. 

“Wanna spread this cunt. Come on, rub yourself against me.”

Ignoring Jungkook's pleas of wanting to be suffocated by your pussy, you shake yourself out of a familiar daze full of desire and lust. This bastard! 

You pull away, not only to give him one last taste of your mouth, but also taking the approaching orgasm from yourself. Jungkook's quiet until a noise of both surprise and disappointment fills your bedroom. You get off his lap, facing him while you give him a perfect view of your messy appearance. One he's undoubtedly the reason for. 

“Why would you do that?” he whines, tugging onto the handcuffs again. His face grows frustrated at the restraint. 

And then it's gone. What was a frustration just a second ago, you watch his entire face morph into a perfect slowly growing smirk. 

He's satisfied. Satisfied that once again, he proved you just how much control he has over you even with barely any way of touching you. He can't use his hands, he can barely move as they stay handcuffed above him, secured around your bed headframe. But that hasn't stopped him. No. He was cunning enough that at the first chance of being somewhat close to you, he used his mouth. 

“You'll pay for that.” you inform him, trying to keep your features hardening and not to melt when Jungkook's lips stretch into a wide grin. 

“For what?” he scoffs, “For almost making you cum?”

Ignoring the obvious and amused jab at you nearly losing it (when he's the one handcuffed), you nibble on your inner cheek. 

“Come on, free me now. You had your fun.”

Your eye almost twitches at that. 

“Lemme fuck you, you love it from behind, huh?”

Despite his nasty words leaving your stomach fluttering, more than it should, you don't let him get past your walls. You sigh, loud so he can hear it perfectly and maybe make him feel unsure of what's about to come. He stays silent. Watching you as you reach for your nightstand, you feel his eyes appreciating your nudity before they go back to wondering what you're doing. 

You pull out the sex-toy he gifted you, the one you both used two or three times. His brows are pinched together, probably wondering what and who you're going to use it for.

Now, since you've never done this with Jungkook before, you being in full control which has proved to be debatable, you've no idea how he will possibly react. You can only assume. From being in an intimate relationship with Jungkook, you've learned a lot. Apart from the physical side of your own sexual preferences and desires, you've come to notice how Jungkook loves to feel you up. He loves to touch you, explore your body each time like he has never done before.

Even without having many sexual partners before, it's safe to say you've never felt more comfortable than being in Jungkook's hands. Quite literally. The way he touches you… he knows what he's doing. 

Obviously, this is in a way a punishment for him. Actually, now that you think about it, you're not sure if he's doing it purely because you want to, or because of another reason.

So when you place yourself at the end of your bed, making sure you have enough space to lay down, you do exactly that. With one swift movement, you spread your legs apart, giving him a full on view on the thing he couldn't get enough of. 

All cockiness is smeared off his face. And while triumph burns inside you – from this great achievement – a realization hits him.

“No.” he murmurs, watching the way you smirk as you turn on the sex-toy. You bring the fake imitation of cock to your clit, moaning at the vibration as soon as it touches you. 

Bottom lip caught between your teeth, there's a clank resounding in front of you as your lips twitch. “I'm definitely having my fun now.” 

“I was–I was just teasing. Come back here, baby.”

You should've probably taped his mouth shut. The freaking petname really tests your patience and determination. 

“I'm serious.”

But he's ignored by you, at least you act like you can't hear him, enjoying the way he groans in protest. However, you can be just as teasing and you moan loudly, letting the dildo's tip enter you. 

“Y/N,” he growls, “This is not funny.”

“Oh, fuck.” 

You would have laughed if you weren't so focused. The truth is, you're sensitive down there – something that's caused by Jungkook and his always running mouth. As much as you itch to get to him and toss the sex-toy as far as possible, you don't give him that satisfaction. At least, not now. 

“Who's in control now, Jeon?” you hum, opening your eyes clouded by both amusement and lust. 

“Okay, I get it.” he grits through his teeth. “Come here.”

“Say it nicely and maybe I'll consider.”

If looks could kill, you're sure you would be six feet under. But one moment of leaning your head down, moaning out loud, you notice his jaw clenching before he clears his throat.

“Come here,” he says softly.

Cracking your eyes, you grin in achievement as you sit up. You're too impatient, you want to touch him. No scratch that. You want to feel him. You want him inside you. But you're playing your part in this act, making it seem as if you have all the time in the world. 

You turn off the sex-toy, the one he probably mentally curses for buying, and you come closer to him. The expectation and despair on his face makes you want to laugh. He's cute. And freaking hot too. 

His chest heaves, it glistens with a sheer coat of sweat. His cologne and scent that's glued to his skin has filled your bedroom. He watches you carefully, almost as if he expects you to tease him more. But when you sit back down on his thighs, facing him, he sighs in relief. His cock begs for attention and you give him a few pumps, ones that make his eyes flutter shut as he gets what he wants. Partly.

You leave the dildo next to you, planning on using it later as you glance at your nightstand. A look of surprise and then disappointment fills your face, one that Jungkook quickly questions.

“What?”

“I've got no condoms. You have some with you?”

Jungkook snickers, “You mean did I bring condoms with me when you decided to have a break from this ?”

You give him a glare, “I wasn't planning on having sex.”

“Do I look like I was?” he questions with a raise of his brow. 

“Don't you have them with you most of the time?”

“Clearly not,” he rolls his eyes, “What's the issue anyways? I haven't had sex with anyone else.”

You're the one who rolls their eyes now, “You would be really quick if you have. It's been like a week since the trip.”

Deep down, you know Jungkook could've gone anywhere and had sex during this week. If he wanted to.

“And you know it's not about that.” you add.

“Let's end this with a bang. Since you know, we're not supposed to have sex then.”

“Are you mocking me?” you frown. He purses his lips to avoid smirking. 

“What did you say? One last time?”

“You know, keep talking and I'm gonna finish myself in front of you.”

“Not what I had in mind but,” he acts as if he's thinking hard. “It would still be something. I love that cunt.”

Almost choking on your spit, you quickly recover. You need to wipe that smirk off his face. “Or I could just leave you here, handcuffed and naked.”

“You wouldn't!” he exclaims.

“Try me.”

He shakes his head with a disapproving frown. “We don't have that many options. Either raw or go to sleep.”

What are you even talking about? Your coincidence scolds you.

“You're right,” you say, already hovering. “I love this cock.” you tell him cheekily, watching his eyes widen just as you grab him by the base. 

You bring it to your entrance, teasing him a little (and yourself too) but the glare he gives you just prolongs it. He lifts his hips, almost entering you and you gasp, giggling. 

“Who's impatient now?”

“You're testing my patience right now.”

“If I were you, I wouldn't talk too much.” you hum, warning him cutely which causes his features to harden. Oh my god, perhaps you're enjoying this way more than you thought you would! 

Despite everything, you don't want to deprive him and yourself of the pleasure. It's easier to give him one cheeky grin as you guide him to your entrance. His eyes dance across your exposed breasts, looking down at where you're about to connect. That's enough for you to slowly sink down his length, gritting your teeth from the immediate heat that swallows you whole. 

Sex is amazing. But sex with Jungkook has shown you it's more than that.

You would've never thought how addicted you can become to this. Maybe it's a little too dangerous but you don't seem to care. Not at the moment anyway, not when he spreads your folds and stretches your warm and wet walls. Oh god. 

It takes you a moment to fully sink down on him, his hard length settled inside of you as you feel every inch of him. Jungkook groans, throwing his head back. Though, he doesn't usher you to move and gives you space to get used to him. You swear you can feel him in your stomach. 

Starting to roll your hips, your clit brushes against his pubes as his jaw tightens once again. That's not enough for him, but he doesn't voice the annoyance and frustration just yet. He lays his head down properly, dark eyes watching you and the way your body rolls.

You bite your bottom lip, momentarily closing your eyes just to open them and see him staring. “You like that, baby?” you joke, watching his hardening features turn into amused once as you both giggle.

“Baby?”

“You call me that too.”

“Mhm, I do.” he hums as you spread your palms over his chest and lean forward. “You love it.”

“Maybe a little bit too much.” you confess, laughing at your obvious confession.

And then you lift your hips, his cock rubbing against your wall which quickly wipes away his smirk. You let the head of his cock stay inside you, his entire length coated with your juices. 

“Don't play with me,” he says. “This is torture.”

“Then beg.” you propose, watching his features turn into pure shock before they change into devastation. 

It's funny. Makes you giggle all over again.

“What?”

“You heard me. Beg,” you grin, “Or what? Is that against your male ego?”

“You're so cruel,” he begs. “If I knew–Hey now!” he exclaims when you let him slide out of you, your lips curving into a smirk. 

You get off him entirely, laying on your tummy beside him. Elbow leaned against the soft mattress, you prop up your chin on your palm. Jungkook groans, frustration getting the best out of him as you grab the vibration. Turning it on, you catch his attention as you press the vibrating tip against his hard cock. He flinches, cussing you out immediately.

“Yah!” 

You laugh, “What? Does it hurt?”

“I don't know if you noticed, but I'm fucking hard and sensitive.” he grits through his teeth and you pout. “Just do something.”

Rolling your eyes, you turn off the sex-toy, playing into the little facade you created as you toss it away. Lifting yourself, you hoist your leg over his hips and face him with your back. He barely has any chance to react as you sink down on him again. This time, you actually move. He breathes out in relief. 

“I knew you were a good girl.” he mutters, causing you to stop. “No, no. Continue.” he reacts immediately which makes you smile.

You hold your balance by gripping his legs, just below his knees as you start riding him. It's hard to focus on other things than just his cock inside you. 

“Mhm, fuck.” You hear behind you, a soft moan leaving your own mouth when he hits your good spot. 

You pick up your pace, your ass smacking against Jungkook's skin but when you start to feel the familiar heat gathering in your lower religion, you're forced to stop. You don't want to cum too soon. Jungkook whines, cursing under his breath. 

“You're so whiny.” you comment, sending him a look of amusement across your shoulder. 

He's frowning, mouth pouting without realizing as he tugs onto the handcuffs again. Realization hits him and that makes you laugh again. He forgot he's handcuffed and wanted to touch you. 

“Just wait until you're done.” he threatens. 

Ignoring the way your stomach tightens in excitement, you don't give him that satisfaction of recognizing his effect that he has on you. Instead, you turn around to face him, sitting back on his thighs as you lean toward him.

“One last time, remember?"

“You also said break and look at us now,” he bites back smartly. “When I asked you if you're gonna let me in, this wasn't what I had in mind. But I'm not complaining.”

You start tracing random patterns on his abs, they flex under your touch and you know he's holding himself back. “That would be awful if you were complaining.” you hum.

“Y/N,” he whines. “Just do something.”

“I told you. Beg… or ask nicely.” you hum, moving your finger up to his chest.

“Please,” he says dryly.

You lift your brow at him, giving him an unimpressed glare. “I said nicely.” you remind him.

He groans, almost ready to throw a tantrum. Oh, this is so much fun!  

“Please, wanna fuck that pussy.”

You smile, leaning forward to get close to his face. His breath hitches as your lips hover over his. The faintest touch of them earns the corner of his lips before you pull away. You wrap your hand around his cock, pumping him a little before you put him inside you again. Jungkook hums and nods, obviously too joyful that you've finally listened. You don't waste any time, lifting your hips up and down as you ride him. 

“This is what you wanted?”

“Fuck yes.” Jungkook breathes out, muscles tensing. “Fuck, that's it. Yeah, just like that.”

He says, forcing his eyes to stay open as he watches your breasts bouncing. 

“Fuck, baby.”

Despite being fully engrossed in chasing your orgasm, you still smile in the midst of it. 

You're close to cumming, stopping your movements shortly after which leaves Jungkook whining. Loud and clear. 

“You were close, weren't you?” he teases after frustration slowly fades away.

“Shut up,” you bite. 

“Come on. Fuck me. Please .” he begs softly.

Nibbling on your bottom lip, you comply and move your hips again. This time, you don't stop. You chase your orgasm while Jungkook coaxes you through it.

“That's right, use me.”

“You like this?” you breathe out, throwing your head back as you feel yourself getting closer and closer.

“I love it,” he corrects you. “I'm gonna miss this cunt so much.”

“Don't say that,” you croak out. “You're making me regret things.”

“No regrets,” he groans. “Fuck, yeah.” He moves his hips up, meeting your thrusts in the middle as you whimper.

A few more thrusts and one big from Jungkook, you come undone above him. The knot snaps inside you and your entire body stills as your walls start clenching and unclenching. Your juices drip down Jungkook's length, undoubtedly staining your sheets as well but that's the least of your worries. 

Jungkook watches you come back to reality, eyes clouded with lust.

“You think you can go for round two?” he asks, watching you breathe out an audible chuckle. 

You can.

Giving him a nod, you settle onto rubbing his chest softly while trying to catch your breath.

“Uncuff me,” he says, stealing all your attention once again – this time not caused by the usual charms of the man under you. “Just wanna touch you.” he adds, softly and with a pout.

“What if I don't want you to touch me?” you hum, starting to roll your hips again which makes him hiss.

He grunts, closing his eyes. “Don't lie to yourself.”

Regardless of both of you aware of the lie, you keep smiling knowing he's damn right. 

“I'm not gonna do anything, I swear.” he promises, whining as your movements deepen.

Feeling like you could chase your second orgasm of the night, you reach behind you and put your hands on his thighs. Jungkook stares, eyes wide despite the evident desire and need.

“Holy fuck, you're gonna be the end of me.”

You giggle. You freaking giggle and Jungkook swears he's done for. 

“You little minx,” he grunts. “You wanna make me cum without me touching you? That's fucking cruel.”

“I like to be cruel sometimes.” you tease.

As much as you wish his hands would be on you, touching you everywhere and the way only he can, this is so much fun. 

While Jungkook's eyes are the only touch you can feel, the dark irises leave hot traces all over your skin, you enjoy his attention on you. It's no secret he alone brings you more confidence than he can ever imagine. Not to grow sentimental, especially right now and at this dirty moment, but for that you'll be forever grateful to him. You're scared for what's about to come in the future. You're too scared to think about it and you automatically shut down any hints of those thoughts coming up. 

You enjoy this while you can.

After this, you want to focus on your friendship with him. It's for the best.

You could easily regret doing this with him right now. Especially after the idea of taking a break. In reality, you don't. There are no regrets as of now and you hope they won't come. You won't allow it. 

“Play with your tits, baby. Show me,” Jungkook pants. 

Having you slowly start to bounce on his cock again brings a rush of heat to every inch of his body. You obey, grasping your breasts into your palms while you squeeze to soft flesh. Jungkook whines and groans, clearly still frustrated he can't touch them or anything at this point. 

“Pinch your nipples.” he orders, not full of dominance like you're perhaps used to, but full of desperation. 

You moan as you listen to him, bringing more pleasure to your body as you imagine it's Jungkook's hands instead. Eyes closed yet again, you can't bring yourself to keep them open. Your muscles strain, lungs begging for more air as you feel your heartbeat drumming in your eardrums. 

“Fuck,” you pant, “Think I'm gonna cum.” you force yourself to admit, totally clueless to Jungkook obviously seeing and feeling it. 

“Rub your clit for me. Fuck.”

Hand reaching between your legs, it's a little tricky to fully obey as you're still bouncing on his cock, close to cumming. You still rub your clit, whimpering and stuttering things you can't remember. Whatever leaves your mouth blends with the sounds of skin slapping. One hand on Jungkook's abdomen, you make sure you stabilize yourself while the other works on your clit. 

“Keep going, keep going,” Jungkook whimpers. “Please, please, please.”

You do. Your thighs burn but nothing won't stop you. Orgasm comes crashing down on you for the second time. Your walls clench around Jungkook's cock, sucking him dry as Jungkook warns you of his own approaching orgasm. 

“Fuck, fuck, I'm cumming.” he manages to get out.

Just in time, you barely make it and lift yourself as Jungkook's thick cum shoots up. The warm liquid lands on your pussy, some of it getting onto your lower belly trickling down your thighs. 

Jungkook curses under his breath, head dropping down onto pillows as his chest heaves. Yours too. Dropping down next to him, there's no care in the world as you both try to come back to your senses. 

After a minute of harsh breathing fading, Jungkook comments. “Almost didn't make it.”

Looking at him, you both grin at each other. “I made it.”

He scoffs playfully, amused by your confidence. He's restrained, therefore it would be completely your fault if he came inside you. 

“Gonna uncuff me now?” 

“Oh shit.” you curse, sitting up as you grab the key off your nightstand, leaning forward to uncuff Jungkook's wrists. 

As soon as you do, Jungkook's arms shoot down as the pair of pink fluffy handcuffs land on your floor. You watch him rub his wrists, frowning before looking at you as you shoot him a sheepish grin.

“You enjoyed that?”

“Probably more than I thought I would.” you giggle.

Jungkook's lips twitch. “At least one of us did.”

“You came, didn't you?” you raise your brow at him. “I'm receiving no complaints then.”

He laughs, sitting up as he cracks his neck. Looking down at his crotch and around the bed, he cringes a little. “Made a mess.”

“It's fine, I'm gonna clean that up. Go take a shower.” you point toward the door.

“You sure?” he asks, cocking his brow at his cum sticking to your skin. 

“Yeah,” you laugh, reaching for the wipes that are beside your bed. You clean yourself, ushering Jungkook to use your bathroom while you take care of this mess. 

Knowing there's no point in arguing, he still with an unsure look starts to get out of your bed. What he doesn't expect though is a slap delivered on his buttcheek. He turns around, shocked with mouth agape as he shoots you a look. 

“What does it feel like?” you tease, biting onto your lower lip as he shakes his head, fighting back a grin. Too bad, you catch a good glimpse of it. 

“You're lucky this is over.” he tells you, ruffling his raven hair. 

You're not sure if lucky is the right word to describe it, though it works for what he has in mind. And god, you're so close to calling this break off. Desperate and foolish. 

But since he talks about luck, it seems like it's on your side this time considering he turns around and leaves the room before you can make another rash decision. 

You decide to finish the movie after you're both cleaned, and so is your bedroom with fresh sheets. Everything goes back to normal, both of you acting as if you haven't had sex a few minutes ago. Ignoring the way every inch your skin feels like it's been electrified.

Jungkook's body takes most of the space in your bed eventually, the entire bedroom swallowed in darkness as chilly air fans your thin curtains. No scent of sex anymore just like there is no trace of your previous doings. The only proof lives in both of you now.

“Back to best friends?” Jungkook asks behind you, his arm outstretched just above your head.

“Back to best friends.” you confirm, ignoring the sentiment behind your tone.

“Don't tell anyone that I–”

“That I had you handcuffed and you whined?”

“Yah!”

Cackling, you look across your shoulder as if you could see him. “Are you ashamed of it?” you tease.

“Taehyung wouldn't let me live if he knew.”

You both laugh quietly. 

“Can you rub my back now?” you say after a while.

Jungkook snickers, sighing as he gets on his side facing your back. His hand is on your back, scratching and rubbing gently as you hum in pleasure.

“Shouldn't you be the one who's rubbing my back? Y'know because of what you've put me through tonight.” he grumbles, causing you to smile into your pillow.

“Didn't you enjoy it?”

“I couldn't touch you.” he says as if that answers everything. 

You still keep smiling, not being able to fight it back. “But other than that?”

He doesn't respond for a moment, leaving you to look behind you again. He hears the sheets rustling. “I came, didn't I?”

Somehow, that answers your question and you hum, lullying yourself to sleep – with the help of Jungkook's hands and touch of course. However, with a serious realization of what the fuck are you going to do now.

Jungkook

𝕸𝖔𝖔𝖓𝖑𝖎𝖙 [Teaser] 🔞

They told you to be careful with him, that he's much more than meets the eye, but you'd been convinced that you had him all figured out; all bark and no bite, just like any other big buff alpha you've met before. Oh how wrong you were.

Tags/Warnings: (here we go...) werewolf!kook, Alpha!kook, werewolf!reader, omega!reader, some angst, blood and fighting, we love drama, strangers to mates, soulmate AU, major injury, hurt & Comfort, fluff, Primal Play, slight powerplay (mc fights for dominance but looses), biting, rough manhandling, Dom!Jungkook, protected sex (an implant is mentioned we practice safe sex even in our imagination after all), Size kink because it's me writing this get over it, strength kink because it's me writing this get over it², spitting oops, spanking oops², mean dom kook, scratching oops³, orgasm control, knotting oops⁴, happy ending Yay

Length: unsure, approx. 5 chapters, ~2k words each.

A/N: Hi hello look it's technically not a hybrid fic. Also yes this teaser contains partial smut so please do not read this at church or your mom's birthday thanks.

🌘.━━━━━━━━━━.🌕.━━━━━━━━━━━.🌒

"Hm, but I'll play with you, won't you like that, hm?" He hums into your ear, and you melt underneath his words, easily nodding at his proposal, because you've waited way too long for this.

He's finally made his move, and you're gonna enjoy every last second of it.

"You think I haven't heard you talk to Jimin about me, don't you?" He suddenly brings up, inked arm reaching over your thigh so his hand can cup your heat- harshly so, forcing your body upright even, and you can't help but mewl at the way it puts pressure on your aching core. "You think I don't know how you yap about me to your friends hm? How you call me nothing but what? A 'bitch in heat', wasn't it?" He recalls, and you whimper a bit because you did call him that.

You called him a lot of other nasty things, and you do regret it a little. Just a tiny bit though. Or maybe a lot.

"Yeah well-" you huff impatiently, throwing your head back over his shoulder. "-You're all talk and nothing more." You complain. "You'll just- you just wanna fuck me and then toss me aside like everyone else!" You tell him with a slightly angry bite to your tone, and he clicks his tongue, fingers of his effortlessly opening the buttons of your shorts.

"Stupid omega-bullshit." You blame, hips moving impatiently as you curl your toes from the sensation. He shakes his head.

"And yet you let me." He chuckles, and you want to cry. Because you do let him fuck you over like this, right now. You do, with full knowledge of the consequences after. But you also want him, because he's got these.. glimpses of something you've never had before.

These moments of actual happiness, actual care and gentle adoration- something similar to the love everyone always gushes about around you, the thing you've never quite experienced before. "Why, I wonder." He asks you, while his fingers easily dip in between your legs, slick making it easy for him to move around.

"I think you know why." He shakes his head however, free hand moving to pull you up properly against his chest again, perched up on his thigh, legs spread open while your shorts and underwear pool at your ankles. "You know exactly why you let me, and why I'm doing this in the first place." He offers, and you don't answer.

Cause you're not sure. If it's not your omega hormones, then what? Is he going to come at you with some fated soulmate bullshit?

"You've got me tangled around your fingers, darling, and you don't even know it." Jungkook tells you with ear amusement in his tone, voice vibrating against your back. "Your body is calling out to me, and only me, isn't it?" He wonders, two fingers dipping inside you, finally giving you something at last. "You crave me, and can't bear the thought of anyone else touching you like this." He explains, while he leans in to let his lips run over the skin near your ear, searching for where your scent is strongest. "You feel empty without my touch, cold without my presence, lonely without my eyes on you." He goes on, and you want to cry out of frustration because first of all how does he know, and second of all why can't you fucking cum?!

"You know I'm right." The alpha wolf tells you. "Because I feel the exact same things." He offers.

"Wha-" you start, before you're interrupted by a specific motion of his fingers inside you, legs kicking out.

"Dont act so surprised." He mumbles against your skin, watching from above how you squirm in his grip, arm holding you close while the other plays around with you. "Its not like I'm hiding anything from you or anyone else." Jungkook chuckles. "Not like you, that is." He teasingly bites at your earlobe, making you shudder.

You're absolutely boneless in his grip right now, close to crying as he keeps your final high always a breath away.

"You're testing my patience, darling." The wolf continues, really making sure you know he's truly playing with you. "One moment you want me, the next you don't. Who's really playing a cruel game here, I wonder?" He accuses, and now you're really close to tears, but for different reasons.

"I dont-" you start, moving your legs in desperation. "- Wanna talk 'bout that now.." you whine, and he clicks his tongue.

"You don't ever want to." He almost growls. "And I'm sick of it, darling." He says, the pet name said almost like a threat, harsh and sharp. "You either talk-" he starts, and you're sweating at what cruel thing he's got in mind. "-or I'm leaving you."

And you know that by leaving, he's not only talking about his hand between your legs.

And that- the prospect of him leaving you alone- finally breaks the floodgates, making you cry.

Because you dont want him to leave.

Not anymore.

skirt chasers

jjk x (f) reader

summary “Baggy clothes are in, but you wouldn’t know that, Miss I Draw Inspiration From Catholic School Girls.” tags f2l, triple texting king kook, ncampus crush kook who is also the weird gamer boy, the skirt aspect is forgotten towards the end tbh, dumbassery is a disease and we are all affected by it, confessions SO CORNY it could be a 2005 teen romcom warnings smut in the form of: unprotected sex, use of mirrors, mostly heavy petting as foreplay I’m sorry, mentions of Jk’s furry ways as a gag kinda, like an unnecessary amount of swearing  wc 7.8k 

to make a long story short, i saw this nsfw gif and wrote this entire fic between 2 am and 6 am anyway i actually really like how this turned out!! lmk when u think

Part of the ideology behind the pleated skirt was in hopes that buying a new wardrobe would somehow help you rebrand your image around campus. Truthfully, it was kinda too late for that now; you’d been here going on three years, your friends and anyone with eyes could see that the style of clothing you leaned towards favored comfort over fashion. However, someone—it might’ve been Taehyung—had gone on a drunken spiel the other night concerning the importance of presenting oneself via fashion. It wasn’t aimed at you, but it certainly left you wondering. 

Which is how you find yourself shivering to the bone now, lingering around the west quad as you wait for Jungkook to come out of an anatomy lab. He’s at that point in the semester where grades mean nothing and everything to him at the same time, so Namjoon’s commissioned you and your other pals to take turns babysitting him once a week to make sure he gets at least some assignments done. 

Seguir leyendo

dilf jk: series masterlist

>>pairing: jungkook x reader / dilf jk x grocery store clerk oc

>>genre: strangers to lovers, friends with benefits, smut, fluff

>>status: on going

** snacks are drabbles that can be read as stand alones. they are not relevant to the plot. they are not written chronologically, but i order them as such as i go **

most recent work will be labeled: !! NEW !!

you find a baby in your store and in turn, a dilf finds you

‎❥⁞ part one: the art of wanting - 10.3k words, (m)

‎you find a baby in your store and in turn, a dilf finds you.

❥⁞ snack: the art of caring  - 4.7k words, (m)

‎jk picks you up after a fight with your roommates… he and nari are better company anyway!!

‎❥⁞ snack: gardening/pool day drabble - 1.2k words, (pg)

nari plays in the dirt while jk gardens and you make a bet

‎❥⁞ part two: the art of playing - 6.3k words, (m)

costumes are a must for jk’s work party… they come with the cutest heart-shaped cuffs… now what could they be used for?

❥⁞ part three: the art of craving - 6.9k words, (m)

‎jk takes you to a bbq at his friend’s house. the tri-tip is good but the creampie is even better.

❥⁞ snack: the art of waiting - 3.9k words, (m)‎ ‎ 

jk comes back from his business trip and he’s wearing new pjs… you must get his face between your legs.‎

❥⁞ part four: the art of doubting - 17k words, (m)‎ ‎ ‎

seeds of doubt are planted and unfortunately they grow faster than love. things with jk fall apart. 

❥⁞ part five: the art of yearning: pt 1 - 15.7k words, (m) 

jungkook wants you as much as he misses you. 

❥⁞ part six: the art of trying - 29.3k words, (m)  !! NEW !!

you’re trying to forget about jungkook, but he’s trying to make sure you remember why you shouldn’t. 

Heeyyyyyaaaa, could you plss do an angst JK fic where he’s Y/n’s husband and is unfaithful? I’m a sucker for angst hahaha

The emotional rollercoaster I went through imagining this scenario, jesus freaking christ, I'm almost tempted to make this a series

Pairing(s): King!Jungkook x Queen!OC (Name: Belle)

Rating: G | PG | M | R 18+

Type: Drabble | Oneshot | Two Parter | Series

Genre: Royal AU | Marriage AU

Tags & Warnings: infidelity, cheating, lots of crying and screaming, jungkook is something else dude, sexual references and sexually charged scenes (non-explicit), anGST

This is continued into a lil series so if you like, check out the next part! 

Summer mornings made Belle remember the year of her marriage. It made her happy before, recalling the memories of the handsome Prince Jungkook taking her hand in marriage. She was only a young, blushing princess who'd walk around in pink veils and look at the world with glittering eyes. They had so much time together. Jungkook would take her riding into the forest, they'd walk the gardens together or talk in front of the fire.

When Jungkook became King, those things became a luxury than a regular activity. Belle couldn't remember the last time she and Jungkook spent a day together without any interference. It wasn't possible but god was it needed.

Jungkook looked more tired and fell right to sleep every night. The more he listened to issues of the kingdom, the less he smiled for everyone's convenience.

The downward trail of the King, they said. Jungkook would eventually lose all sense of his true self to become embodiment of a feelingless monarch.

Feeling the heat against her skin, Belle decided to take matters into her own hands. Her duties would not begin until later in the afternoon and the hearing of the King must've ended once the sky was bright. Picking the skirt of her green dress, she made her way to the private room in the main castle where Jungkook would relax before moving onto other duties.

Perhaps they could go riding and postpone some duties. Or they could just stay in the private room like they used to on breaks. Her heart pounded in excitement, feeling like a young princess for a few seconds as she ran across the hallways to Jungkooks' private room.

"My love!" Belle called out gently as she opened the door. Her grin quickly dropped, stomach lurched and heart sunk into an endless pit.

All the naivety dissipated as she saw a creme dress and blonde hair, sitting on Jungkooks' lap, plump lips latching off his jawline when she heard Belle come in. Jungkook moved his hands off the girls' waist, hair messy over his eyes.

The girl flushed red and jumped off his lap, bowing pathetically and rushing out of the private room.

She let out a small shaky sigh, hand over her stomach; nauseated from the sight. "Why did you—"

Jungkook stood up and carefully walked towards her, his black shirt mostly opened to reveal his chest. "Belle..."

Belle shook her head, slamming the door shut. "You could've talked to me!" Eyes flooded with tears and her heart felt like it was being forced out of her chest. "I was sitting here for months thinking you were actually suffering and—" She leaned forward on the large wooden table as Jungkook inched closer.

"It was nothing serious—" Jungkook whispered in that same loving way. How tainted and dirty it sounded after what she just saw. He leaned his nose against her temple. "—my love—"

"Don't!" Belle pushed him away roughy. Her crown sliding off the side of her head, tears staining her cheeks and her breathing grew ragged. "Don't call me that and touch me when you still smell like her!" Her voice cracked.

Jungkook tightened his jaw, persisting to step closer. "I'm your husband."

"Mighty good one at that." Belle stepped back. "You drink, you never talk to me, you have your own chambers now, it's for fucking her, isn't it?" She gestured roughly to the door.

Jungkook almost towered over her. "No—"

"Don't lie to me! I've tried being a good wife and queen for you and your kingdom and you—" Belle pushed him further away again. "—go behind my back like common dog!"

Jungkook grabbed onto her hands this time, turning her around until his arm was locked around her body.

"Let me go!" Belle cried out.

"Shh..." Jungkook nudged his lips against her earlobe, another arm held over her chest to leave no distance between them. "Don't weep, please."

Belle only sobbed more, still trying to break away until her crown clanged on the table. Her curls hovered half her face. "Why—"

"I don't—I don't know why," Jungkook whispered. "Please, just don't cry." He buried her face against the crook of her neck.

Her breathing calmed for a moment as she softened into his hold. Jungkook took that second to kiss her neck.

Whether she was like this out of sheer exhaustion or actual peace was a debate to be had later. All Belle knew right now was no one was going to comfort her for something like this other than him. Her new Queenly duty.

the lines between us | jjk. (m)

banner credit to my lovely @viefleur isabella <3

➵ summary : you’re detective partners who hate each other’s guts and everyone knows it. what they don’t know however, is that there’s so much more between the lines, and he knows damn well how to rearrange your guts too.

➵ pairing : detective!jungkook x detective!reader

➵ genre : detective!au, partner!jungkook, e2l!au, fwb!au, slight fantasy!au, one-shot, smut, angst

➵ rating : 18+

➵ word count : 10k

➵ warnings : swearing, angst!!, arguing, tension, mentions of guns, injury & crime, explicit sexual content, heavy petting, slight brat!reader, slight brat-tamer!jk,  fingering, nipple play, oral (f. receiving), clit biting, hate sex, choking, size kink, dirty talk, degradation, humiliation, restraint (w/ jungkook’s hands), denied orgasm, hitting it from the back, a spank, pain kink, missionary, creampie, cum play, overstimulation, f. masturbation, cum tasting, finger sucking

↳ in submission for the july games:

❂ “To The Lighthouse”          ⁂ hosted by: professor bee @inkedtae through @bangtansorciere

⤐  au type: salty shores // enemies to lovers ⤐  themes: slow burn, fantasy ⤐  kinks: clit biting, spanking, pain kink, size kink, dirty talk, overstimulation, degradation, humiliation, masturbation, cum play <3

➵ a/n : first of all massive thank you to bee @inkedtae !! thank you for offering your lovely help by having a read and making me feel 20892x more confident 😭 thank you to @viefleur my beautiful isabella for making this perfect banner for me!! i appreciate her hard work so much and thank you to my lovely @opaljm @taegularities and @hantaev​ for beta-ing!! not to forget @ppersonna​ lindy for helping me figure out my whackass tenses 💀 as always feedback means the world to me <3

➵ playlist : set me on fire by estelle

“You’re the most infuriating person I know on this fucking planet.” 

Seguir leyendo

SURPRISE! || KTH

❃ Festivaled Away: Daredevil Week hosted by @bangtanbathhouse​

⤞ Ticket: Adrenaline Rush ⤞ Main Event: A Dare ⤞ Games: Exhibitionism 

⤞ title: SURPRISE! for @kithtaehyung​ ⤞ pairing: taehyung x female reader ⤞ genre: smut | established relationship ⤞ summary: Your boyfriend is sending you nudes, again… And also helping you discover hidden kinks? ⤞ word count: 1.5k ⤞ warnings: taehyung with the gold chains | female masturbation | exhibitionism | praise kink | dom!taehyung | sub!reader | phone sex | voice kink | teasing | a little begging | dirty talk | nudes | erotic humiliation | finger sucking | orgasm control | a little obedience play? | Sir kink | pet names | idk if it classifies as a plot twist but yeah…to be safe. ⤞ rating: 18+ ⤞ a/n: Happy Birthday to one of my bestest friends!!! I love you, Ryen!!! And I hope this little drabble brings you another smile on your birthday! Today I present 1.5k words of dom!Taehyung finishing heauxs with only the sound of his voice. Thank you @taechwitaaah​ for beta-reading this for me at the last minute. Thank you @yoon2k​ for the prompts! Oh, and for context, this is why I sent you a playlist lol. SURPRISE!

⤞ playlist: Surprise by Chloe | Melt by Kehlani | Go Crazy by Chris Brown, Young Thug | Wild Side by Normani ft. Cardi B | Cyber Sex by Doja Cat | Good For You by Selena Gomez, A$AP Rocky | WE (Warm Embrace) by Chris Brown

“Why would you do this to me?”

Seguir leyendo

WILD THOUGHTS - JJK

sometimes, being an esteemed photographer had its ups and downs. this time, it was a bit of both.

pairing — jungkook x female reader

genre — smut, angst

word count — 1.7k

warnings/tags — photographer!jk x spoilt!reader, dom!jk, sub!reader (implied), swearing/cursing, insults, praise, bros got the biggest boner in public, male masturbation, jk is big mean, degradation, oral (implied m receiving), mentions of pussy eating, mentions of unprotected sex, mentions of cumshots/creampies

a/n: this was something i was going to write a while ago, with the brains of @mercurygguk but i figured i’d keep it short and simple for the sake of ramadan 😭

btw!! this isn’t my last post before ramadan, i have another post scheduled to automatically post next month 🥳

hope everyone has a blessed month! 💗

Oh, the absolute fucking nerve you had to walk into his studio and cause a commotion, boss around his employees like you owned the place.

His week had been utter hell, running from one studio to the other, taking photos of his models but being back at his usual studio, Jungkook thought he could have a relaxed session with you.

Yeah, he did his research on you just to see what he was getting himself into and honestly, he wasn’t surprised.

Upon entering your name into the search engine, before your wiki page even came up, his screen was plastered with tons of articles about you, and they were nothing to be proud of.

‘Spoilt brat.’

‘Rude.’

‘Disrespectful.’

The list went on.

That was when he discovered you were handed this modelling opportunity because of the high status your parents held among designer brands, being the most sought after celebrities.

Your mother pulled a few strings and here you were.

With a bit of back and forth arguing, Jungkook instructed you to head to the dressing room with his assistant to get you ready for the shoot and surprisingly, you obeyed.

It wasn’t long before you stepped out onto the set, a silk robe shielding your body as his assistant did some final touch-ups on you.

The silence on set was deafening as you pulled off the robe, donned in a white lace bra and a thong, with the addition of a short lace skirt that barely covered your most intimate parts.

Now don’t get him wrong, Jungkook had come across thousands of models, all beautiful in their own way, and never affected by them, but something about you… your curves straining against the tight bands of the undergarments, tits sitting perfectly within the confines of your bra…

He fucking loved it.

It was such a shame you had the desired genes for this industry, but fucking hell, your personality made him wanna throw a brick at your face.

You were completely unaware of the commotion stirring within him, going about as usual and climbing onto the bed on set and ignoring the unwarranted stares you were receiving from everyone, “How do you want me?”

It takes Jungkook a couple seconds to gather himself before instructing you to lie on your stomach and lean on your forearms, giving you the freedom to position your hands as you please.

“Give me sexy, and seductive, I’m sure you’ll have no trouble with that,” he says, bringing the camera up to his eye without realising what he’d just said.

You promptly ignore him, trying to contain the little bubble of excitement building in your stomach as you posed, hands gracing your face, fingers occasionally grazing your jawline.

Jungkook hums in approval, taking a couple more snaps and putting you in different positions before instructing you further, “Good, now take the skirt off and lie on your back,” he says, pulling the camera away from his face to gaze down at you.

You sit up on your knees, unbuttoning the skirt from the waist band and pulling it off, handing it too him and now being extremely aware of how exposed you were.

This is what it meant modelling for a lingerie brand; exposed skin and provocative photos.

Despite how you felt, you laid back on the bed, bringing one leg up to a slight bend as you threw your arms above your head, face turned to the side with your eyes closed as Jungkook snapped away, moving around you to capture every perfect angle.

All you could hear from him was praise and validation, the occasional ‘good girl’ slipping from his lips. You usually didn’t care for validation, knowing you were good at everything, but Jungkook… There was something about that asshole that made your skin crawl with goosebumps and you were certain he must’ve noticed.

And he did notice, being on his knees next to you, but he assumed it was due to the cold so didn’t comment on it. He was far more focused on capturing every angle possible because he wanted to wrap this up asap.

He rises up to his feet again, “Okay, on your hands and knees for me.”

Your breath hitches in your throat, but you don’t have time to process his words already being on a tight schedule. You did as told, standing on all fours on the bed, your spine arching perfectly and ass raised in the air slightly.

Jungkook bites back a smile, eyeing your current state as he stood before you.

Now would be a good time to shut you up with his cock.

He hides his face with the large camera, adjusting the lens to pick up everything from your perfectly raised ass peeking out behind your head, the sensual lighting drawing in the shadows along your body, accentuating your curves.

He’d be lying if he said his dick didn’t jump at the sight.

You were completely unaware of the affect your body had on him, continuing your job as expected and after a solid 2 hours, Jungkook called everything a wrap.

He sets his camera down on and extends his hand out to help you off the bed, his hand burning upon holding yours, “You’re free to leave, I’ll be in contact with you in the next couple days to discuss what comes next,” he tells you, dropping your hand and dismissing you rather quickly as you tried to stand up straight.

“Have a good night, Miss L/N.”

He didn’t wanna be in your presence any longer, nor did he wanna deal with your incessant complaining, when the boner in his pants was bound to burst any minute now.

You don’t even get a chance to open your mouth before he’s out the door, wondering why he was in a rush.

Why was he in a rush?

Because the moment he jumped into his car, driving out onto the streets, his boner was doing up a madness; relentlessly straining against his trousers as he gripped harshly onto the steering wheel.

He replays the moment he was spotting you in that vulnerable position; ass up, face down, the seamless arch of your spine adding a hint of elegance and sweetness to your appearance, though you were the complete opposite.

Rude and vile.

Taking photos of you from behind, your barely clothed cunt on display, sitting snug against the flimsy material.

Just one small movement of shifting your thong to the side and he could be burying his face in your pussy, eating you out to his desires—

“Fuck!” Jungkook slams his fist against the wheel, using his free hand to palm his throbbing cock for some relief.

He shouldn’t be thinking about you like this.

He was clearly wound up and full of sexual frustration after that shoot and it was unknown to him why this occurred so easily and why you of all people, had to be the cause.

Within a matter of minutes, Jungkook was pulling into his apartment garage, climbing out of his car and locking the door, using his bag as a shield to hide his erection from anyone he walks past.

He takes the elevator up to his penthouse suite, unlocking the door with a shaky hand and entering, dropping his bag to the floor and slamming the door shut behind him.

Good thing he was alone, he didn’t know if he was angry or horny right now, pacing up and down the room and pinching the bridge of his nose.

Maybe he was both.

He shouldn’t.

He really shouldn’t…

Fuck it, he could deal with the consequences later.

Jungkook throws himself on the couch, slouched back and thighs spread apart. Like this, his boner looked far bigger than he thought which made him wonder if anyone within distance from the garage and the building actually noticed it.

He removes the buttons of his shirt, leaving it open to give himself some air before reaches down to pull his pants off along with his boxers, letting his hardened cock slap against his abdomen, aching for a girl it shouldn’t.

He doesn’t waste another minute, wrapping a firm hand around the base of his cock, pumping himself up and down slowly as his head falls back against the couch.

“Shit…” he grits, bucking his hips up into his fist to get himself off, spreading the small beads of precum at his tip along the entirety of his cock.

Jungkook’s mind wanders far, conjuring up the sinful image of you riding him, your sweet little pussy clutching onto his cock like a tight glove and perfectly rounded tits bouncing in his face.

“Fucking hell…” he curses under his breath, using his free hand to massage his balls, squeezing and pulling at them for something more. He shook his head, tightening his grip, “That fucking bitch…” he seethes, picking up the pace as his thighs twitched, “How dare she do this to me…”

With a raspy moan, he continues to think about you, your plush lips wrapped around his cock, mouth taking him whole as he uses one hand to grasp at your skull, pushing your head further down till the tip of your nose was brushing against him.

He imagines you touching yourself with your mouth stuffed full of his cock, unable to wait like a desperate bitch.

Jungkook would do everything he could to hurt you in all the right ways; using you as his personal fleshlight, his very own cumdump who’d be there for him on-call because spoilt brats like you didn’t deserve the luxury of a comfort fuck.

No, spoilt girls like you deserved to be treated like whores; broken down into nothing because that’s what they deserve.

Maybe that would teach you a lesson; you can’t always get what you want.

“Gonna give her a piece of my mind,” he tells himself between panting breaths, stroking his hard cock and pushing himself closer to his orgasm.

He was so close.

The undying urge he had to paint your face with his cum, splay your tits white and bury himself balls deep in your pussy till you drained him of every last drop—

And that did it.

Thick ropes of cum were landing on his lap, all over his hands, some of it dripping down the base of his cock and he jerked himself off slowly, getting the last of what he could before letting go with a heavy sigh.

His thighs had tensed up and shirt all creased from the lack of care he took while sitting, and it was now when he realised he got off to you.

Little did he know, you were doing the exact same thing, touching yourself to the thought of him.

taglist: @aliceaflor5-blog @kookiecrumb @jjkeverlast @prettyghost @kooliv @koobsessed @gimmethatagustd @pb-n-juju @aslias17 @ririlovesangst @kootonins @taehyungseggs @dewamused @jungshook7 @jiminsneckkisses @moonfaery @fragmentof-indifference @hoseokteardrop @hopeworldjimin

Please do not repost my works onto any platforms.

Pretty Girl~Jungkook

Summary: Getting tattooed over a stupid drunk mistake was nerve racking, but Jungkook knew just the way to help you relax.

Paring: Tattoo!artist Jungkook X Chubby Reader

Warning: Crack in the start, smut, heavily tattooed Jungkook, praise kink is highly hinted at, thick cock Jungkook, mentions of drunk reader but no actual alcohol mention, cream pie so un safe sex(Wrap it before you tap it) Just faith low-key, also its hinted that Jungkook is obsessed with the readers thighs. The ending sucks but I tried lmaooooo also no tattooing actually happens if im being honest.

AN: Finally got this out, sorry about forgetting to post earlier this week. I loved writing this request out. I hope you enjoyed it.

Your hands were shaking slightly, nerves pressing though your chest as you lifted your head from your steering wheel. The neon light flashing into your car, slightly flickering onto your dash as you took a deep breath in, grabbing a black face mask and rolling the straps over your ears as you grab your car key and purse slipping out of your car. Walking up to the metal door you twist the handle pulling it open pushing the next red wooden door open, sighing the sound of a tattoo gun going off and laughter slightly put you at ease. Looking around the grey walls were covered in drawings, artwork and pictures of tattoos and piercings, the T.v screen that was mounted on one wall was a black screen. You slowly walk to the shelving under it, names were printed on the spins of each one, Namjoon, Hoseok, Taehyung, Jackson, Lisa and Jungkook. Your hands reached out to a partially opened one of Jungkooks, when suddenly a deep voice made you jump.

“Hello, how can we help you?” You hand placed on your chest as you see a slight smirking man standing there, his silver hair styled back, his face bare of tattoos and piercings. Yet the moment you looked past his ching the wrap of a spider web linking down to words caught your attention it had you glamping as you looked back up and gave him an awkward smile.

“Yeah..uh I'm looking to do a cover up?” Your words came out as a question making him nod as he reached his hand out.

“I’m Namjoon, what are you looking to cover up?”

“Don't laugh.” You mumble making him shake his head as you let out a sigh as you look at the fabric shorts you had slipped on, thinking ahead that it would be smarter than pants so you wouldn't have to pull them down to see the horrible tattoo. “I was drunk at a party with some friends when someone brought a tattoo gun out.” You mumbled, slowly rolling both of your short legs up. His eyes widen as he starts to shake his head, his thumb and porter finger pressing against his mouth as he lets out a breath.

“No the fuck you didn’t.” His words were full of a slight teasing tone and yet disbelief, it had your cheeks going red as you sigh and drop the shorts back down.

“I swear sober me makes better choices.” You mumbled, though you felt your cheeks heat up even more at the thought of how technically it was your first tattoo. A stupid drunk tatoot. Your words had him nodding slowly as he stepped forward, his hand pressing against your shoulder as you watched a teasing smile on his face.

“I mean drunk you seems fun, getting 'Mouth Here’ with arrows on both of your thighs seems fun.” Namjoon laughed out his hand on your shoulder squeezing slightly, his words had you throwing your head back as you  let out groans as you covered your face.  As you step away from Namjoon you hear the tattoo gun stop as someone pokes his head out. A glove covered hand is what you first see then doe like eyes, silver balls above and below one of his eyebrows catch the artificial lights of the shop as the look of complete and utter interest and curiosity cover his face.

“What did I just hear?” His eyes cast over you, your large frame heating up by the minute as you let out a deep sigh, someone's head popping over his as Namjoon looks over with a smile.

“She needs a cover up.” You watch the man with the eyebrow piercing nod as he takes off the gloves on his hand as he moves forward, throwing them into a waste bin as he moves forward. You saw the man's eyebrow raise, your skin on show as you took a deep breath in, reaching down as you reached down and lifted the ends of your fabric shots. You watch as the man’s doe eyes widen, almost comically as you huff as he pressed his hand against his lips. The sound of huffing, as if he was holding back laughter, had your eyes slightly rolling, cheeks heating with embarrassment as you dropped your shorts again. Him and namjoon made eye contact for a split second before the two were in a fit of giggles, you felt yourself fight off jogging the two in the teasing of your horrible drunk mistake.

“Really? Come on.” You whine slightly, making the man shake his hands as he calmed himself down and looked at you. A seriousness filled the room as he stepped forward and nodded at you, Namjoon watching as he took a breath in and gave you a half smile.

“Do you mind if I touch them? See if there would be any issue with tattooing over them at all?” His words have you nodding slowly as he bends down, the sound of his knees snapping has Namjoon shaking his head. You watch his eyes staying on your large thighs as he lets out a warm breath against your skin. “I'm gonna touch you okay?”

“Yeah.” He nods as his warm thumb suddenly runs over the arrows then down to the words, his head nodding slowly as he stretched the skin slightly and then stood back up.

“They should get covered up pretty easily, you took care of them well. The lines are thin enough, but shaky as hell. Who the fuck did it?” His question had you letting your shorts drop as you pinch the bridge of your nose, taking a deep breath as you watch Namjoon wave as he headed back into the back where he originally was. The man in front of you tilts his head, arms crossed, muscle slightly bulge through the thing baclk long sleeve he was wearing. Your eyes finally cast down to his hands, the look of lettering on his knuckle and slightly a skull piece peeking as you watched his hand move had you blinking, the thought of his vein and tattoo covered hand wrapped around your neck. Shaking the thought out of your head, well trying to, you finally respond.

“Well I was drunk and it was done at a party by some random dude.” You mumble making him nod slowly as he holds his hand out, your hand reaches forward the roughness of his hand making your skin flinch as he gives you a toothy smile.

“Jungkook, I primarily do the cover ups here. So I'm booked till this saturday, let me give you my number so that way we can bounce ideas back and forth for what you want done.” His words had gone from slight teasing to genuine in a istant, it had you letting out a breath of relief.

“Y/n..and seriously thank you, I was so hoping I'd be able to cover these up. When I realized what I did in the morning I legit felt like dying.” You chuckle, shaking your head as he slowly nods finally dropping your hand, you watch as his tongue drags over his lip as his arms recross over his chest. A small smile curling onto his face, a teasing gleam in his eyes making your heart thump against your chest as you take a deep breath in.

“I mean any real person wouldn't need instruction on where their mouth should go.” His words have your neck, cheeks and your ears burning. Though a teasing smile windes onto your face as you cross your arms, pressing your chest makes him look down a gulp as you chuckle.

“You'd be surprised.” You said back, making his smirk grow tenfold as he let out a breathy laugh as he held his hands up taking a small step back as you joined him with the laughter.

“Well fuck thoses people, here my card with my number on it. I'll be waiting to hear from you, pretty girl.” he mumbled a black and white card pinched between his fingers after reaching into his back pocket.

“Hand these out at the bars too?” Your question made his cheeks go flushed as you took the card from him as tilted your head, taking your mask down and giving him a toothy smile. “See you later, pretty boy.” Your words had his cheeks going flush as you hear someone's laughter bubble out of their chest, shaking your head you turn to walk out the sound of Jungkook clearing his throat then snapping out a ‘Hoseok’ had you giggling.

Hey this is Y/n, I was in the shop last night. Wondering if you had time to talk about the cover up?

You let out a breath, the morning cup of coffee resting in front of you as the soft hum of Ariana Grande played in the background. The soft feeling of your overly large flannel brushing against the top of your thighs had your head bobbing as POV started to play. Your hand grabbing the hot ceramic cup you do a quick spin away from the counter to your work desk, the spread of drawings you had been messing with along with the printed papers for school mixed together. The mess had you taking a deep breath in as you set your mug down, you hear a ding of your phone making you reach behind you onto the counter almost falling over as you see a new message.

Hey Y/n, thanks for getting to me so early. I'm in the shop waiting and have time to talk on the phone and get an idea of what you want to do. Also I should've done it last night but, can you send me a picture of your thighs where the tattoo is? That way I have a good idea where the placement should be.

Taking an awkward deep breath in trying to remember if you had a decent picture of the tattoos. The idea of sending him a picture of your thighs was overwhelming in a way, it was strange. He had already seen them, the cleuate the faded stretch marks and the way they overlap each other. The way you scrolled through your photos and letting out a deafening sigh running your hand through your hair as you peek into your snapchat, one of the few photos from that night that the tattoo was done. It has you groaning, the redness from the fresh tattoo and the slight drip of blood had you wincing. Saving the photo you move back to the messages as you take a deep breath and send the photo.

Sorry about the gore, it's the only one I have and it's such an awkward place to take a photo by myself.

Watching the delivered turn to read it had your cheeks flushing read as you exit out of the chat and placed your phone down again. A deep sigh passes your lips at the thought of the tattooed god staring at your thighs, let alone touching them in the next couple of days. The thought alone had your heart racing, and your mind panicking slightly. It wasn't that idea of getting tattooed by him, it was him. Just from the brief feeling of the rough pads of his fingers brushing over you skin had your head rolling in different scenarios in your mind though it was cut off with a ding making you blink slowly. Hand reaching forward and opening your phone, seeing he had messaged back.

Can we do a call on the phone?

It's all good, I'm just glad seeing it fresh compared to how it was last night that it didn't get infected. Anyway, any ideas on what to cover it up with?

Not really, if I'm being honest I just want it covered up..maybe some animals? Nothing flora I have that on my shoulders and I feel like if it was on my thighs too it be way to much

Taking a breath you send a thumbs up, you wait, eyes scanning over the class email you had just received making you groan at the list of the projects that would be due in the next semester. You take another deep breath in, and right as you let it out a ring echoes out of your phone making you look over and swiping the call to start, pressing the microphone placing him on speaker.

“Hey, so no flowers?” Jungkook's voice called out, it was slightly teasing, making you press your chin to your arm as you nod, humming, making him clear his throat. As you perk up as you look at the phone an idea flashed into your head.

“I..I really like horror films.” Your words had an interesting ‘huh’ pass, it had you sitting up as you grabbed your phone and waited as you heard a pencil moving.

“We could do something with that, what's your favorite?”

“I mean I love the classics, nightmare on elms street, friday the thirtieth, chucky..” you trail off trying to fight the excitement as you take a breath in. not wanting to grow too excited and make you seem weird, well more weird than a fat girl who got a horrible tattoo at a party could be as you hear a pencil drop as the ding of a bell.

“What else? We could do a horror movie thigh piece and something else for the other one.”

“Wait, how much would the horror movie piece be?”

“I mean it's not gonna be cheap, but I can work around sessions to make sure you can pay for the cover up and now we can work more and more as time goes on.” His words were slightly rushed as you took a deep breath in a chuckle.

“Are you planning a full leg piece for me or something?”

“I mean what's your cut off price for both pieces together?”

“Uh..no?” His words were a bit of a whisper as you hear a chuckle, a breathy chuckle pass his lips making you imagine his body bending back in a chair and in his hair. And the thought alone made you embarrassed, how could you find someone you only met once so attractive you could imagine how he looked just from the sound of his laugh. Blinking rapidly you let out a chuckle as you take a breath in.

“Let's start with how much the freddy krueger pieces could be?”

“Eight hundred.” You hear him laugh out a thank god making you tilt your head.

“Okay yeah I can work with a eight hundred base line for eboth tattoos, now Freddy on one leg, what one the other?” you let your head fall onto your shoulder as you think, mind racing as you nod and take a breath in.

“Can we do a Tim Burton theme for the other one?”

“Hell yeah.”

An hour later you were more than excited to see the different sketches for thigh pieces Jungkook had drawn up. The two of you had decided that someday you were gonna have a horror movie and tim burton movie collage tattoos pieces, all starting with a small cover up. And though the drunk tattoo wasn't your first tattoo, the flowers on your shoulder a memory of that, the coverup was gonna be the biggest and most time consuming thing you've done. Jungkook for some reason wanted to work with you, and you were gonna turn the availability to get tattoos on your thighs when some other artist had denied doing it simply due to the fact your thighs were to plush to get ‘straight lines’, which in hences yeah it made some sense but also made none at the same time. It had you actually excited, and already decided your next paycheck would partially go into a tattoo saving fund, and everyone after that. Though it wasn't just the sketch he sent you that night that made you excited but also the way his tattoo hand was on the paper next to his artwork and also had your heart skipping a beat.

You feel sweat as you press your hand against the doorknob of the shop, making you huff as you pull it open and step in. Both of your hands sliding down your sides as you look to see Jungkook and another person talking at the pool table. He's wearing a black short sleeve shirt, unlike last time where long sleeves had covered his heavily inked skin. The image you were gettin alone had you freezing, your mind racing with naighty thoughts like the first time you saw him. Taking a breath you look at his arm and see the different designs, snacks, words in an X like shape and even an eye. Blinking you clear your throat as the doorbell rings as you shut it, making the two snap over to look at you. Jungkook's smile grew tenfold as he saw you, it surprised you but you could guess after the five days of bouncing ideas off and slight flirting on the phone as he sent photos he had somewhat grown fond of you like you did him.

“Y/n!” He called out moving away from the pool table as he pulled you into a hug making you slightly stumble as your face was partially squished against his shoulder. Your arms awkwardly wrapped around his waist. The musky smell was slightly sweet, almost dewy it had you closing your eyes as you let your tense shoulders dro[. Pulling away first you see his body was almost, if not more, relaxed as yours. “How are you? Follow me.” You nod, awkwardly waving at the other man who had a small smirk playing on his lips as he waves partially back at you. Decided it would be best to answer Jungkook's question now instead of later you clear your throat as the two of you pass a doorway.

“Okay, a bit tired if I'm being honest, I had a presentation this morning.” You see him nod as he opens another door, inside was a single chair and a TV. you look around a ton of art work along the walls. Stepping in you look around as he moves to start to set up his area.

“How was yours?” You ask as you move to stand next to the table, hand resting against it as he looks up and smiles.

“Good, I did mostly small work today. A dope ass goddess pieces on this one girl's shoulder.” His words had you smiling as he nodded for you to sit down. “Come one, it's all cleaned. I thought this back room would be better since you have to take your shorts off.”  You nod awkwardly as he sat down. His eyes looked at you as he moved around and pulled pieces of paper to you. “So these were the sketches we’ve decided on, right?”

“Hell yeah, these were my favorite, especially with the other works that youtube planned with them. I can't wait to see them all done.” You mumbled making him look up at you and smile.

“Okay, so I have a blanket that I can put over you when you take your shorts off. I'll help cover you up once you're all settled and the outlines are in the right place.” His words were direct and honest as he stood up and moved to a printer. “Also I’ll be letting you know when I’ll be touching you, andIll always ask for your permission before I do, okay?”

“Yeah, it sounds good.” You mumble, anxiety filling you up as he turns and smiles at you.

“Okay so I got the stencils printed, I can put them on while your shorts are still on, or you can take them off. Whichever you prefer. They just can't get in the way while tattooing, and again I have ablacket for you so you feel comfortable, but since they are low and the tattoos placement we discussed  they would get in the way.”

“Jungkook I've got it, I was expecting it so I wore a bigger sweater.” you mumble, anxiety slightly rushing through you as he nodded. “I’ll take them off now, get it done and over with.” He nods again as he moves and sits down as you strip off your shorts you had worn, your mind slightly racing, thankfully of the cute yet simple underwear your friend had somehow convinced you to buy. As you awkwardly stand in front of him, shorts folded at the end of the chair you look at him and nod.

“Okay the spray is gonna be cold.” You nod softly as he moved forward, and placed the paper on spraying it as he pressed down. You slightly jump as you look at him and huff.

“You said cold, not freezing.”

“Sorry, sorry.” He laughs,as he points to a mirror, as you walk, unknowest to you his eyes linger at your butt, his tongue sliding over his lips as he watches you walk and stand in front of the mirror.  You had no idea that he had been having the same thoughts about you as you have of him. Him imagining his hands around your thighs, even the thought of your huffed breath he had heard over the phone when talking to you about your tattoos had run across his mind in unprofessional ways. “You like the placement?” He watches you twist your leg around and nod, eyes looking over at him with a smile. It has him blinking rapidly looking away from your ass and down to the floor and back up to your face.

“Yeah I love it?” Your smile had his thighs shifting as you moved to the table, “So only this one today right?” You ask sitting down as he gulps when watching your thighs flatten out his eyes widening as he takes a deep breath and shakes his head. You watch with curiosity as he grabs a blanket and nods for you to lay down. Once you do he lets out a breath and smile, helping you adjust the blanket across your lap as you look and give him a small smile.

“Need the chair higher,lower?” His question had you shaking your head as you watched him glove up, taking a breath in. The sound of the tattoo gun staring up had you taking a deep breath in, the nervousness spreading across your spine as your hand messed with the popsocket on the back of your phone. Your hair was in a bun, and the feeling of the hair on the back of your head slightly being tugged in a weird way had you blinking, then the sound stopped as you looked down to see Jungkook's eyes peeking at you. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I'm just a bit nervous.” You close your eyes, blinking them open when you feel a gloved hand slightly knead into your thigh. You look to see his eyes already on yours, watching him place the gun down as he stands slightly over you. “Wh-what?”

“You don't need to be nervous at all, pretty girl.” His words were a whisper as you felt your eyes slightly widen as one of his hands lands next to your head. Your eyes move from his eye to his lip then back down again. “There's ways I can help...I have numbing spray..or..” He trails off his lid half closed as he watches the way your chest moves up and down. His free hand moves from its place near your hip up, a gloved finger moves to trace your jaw, down your neck to the color of your crew neck shirt. He looks back up at you as you feel a wetness in your underwear, thighs pushing together as he smiles down at you.

“Or what?” You smacked your lips together as you felt his hand at the collar of your shirt move down past your breast making you let out a shaky breath as he smirks down at you.

“Or I can..do something more physical.” His words were a bit of a whisper as you felt his body suddenly leave your making an unwanted whine that had built up in your throat past your lips. It had his eyes snapping to your face, your arm crossing over your eyes as you took a deep breath in, your knees bending up as you let out the breath. It was a sigh as you heard him slightly laugh, then suddenly the sound of gloves snapping and then the feeling of warm rough hands going between your thighs pushing them apart had you gasping. Looking between them you see his large doe eyes already on your face, his tongue running across his lips as his thumbs started to rub circles into your skin. “I can help you relax this way….if not its fine pretty girl.” His words had you drawing a shaky breath in his  you feel him moving around trying to get comfortable, when his lips press against your inner thigh. One of your hands reached out to press against his hair as he looked back up at you and pressed another kiss into your skin, teeth suddenly nipping at your skin making you gasp. “What do you say? Cause either way after I'm done with your tattoo we're gonna get some food together.” His words had you blinking when your fingers that once laid flat against his hair curled, the strains were soft. His hair being so smooth and the feeling of the individual strains made you pull slightly making a breath moan pass his lips. “Y/n, careful you might have me fall for you.” He breathed out making you roll your eyes as his lips started to trail down from your inner thigh, closer and closer to your underwear. The wetness was bringing a slight chill from the AC and his warm breath fanning over you as he crossed over to your other thigh had goosebump popping up into your skin. “Are you okay with this?”

“I mean you are saying you're gonna give me an orgasum to relax right?” You mumble, a slight teasing tone but a breathy moan after your words. It had Jungkook smirking, nodding as suddenly he pressed a kiss to you, the feeling of his kiss then his warm breath had you letting out a shuttery breath.

“That's the plan, gonna eat you out, tattoo you then feed you.In that order.” He mumbled, his words were met with you rapidly blinking as you felt his hand move to your thigh, rubbing as he pushed it down making you whine at the stretch. “From the fist time you walk in this week, to the fucking picture Ive been imagining myself between your fucking thighs, pretty girl.” He all but growled as he pressed another kiss as his other hand moved up to cup your hips, his fingers curling into your underwear as he looked up at you. “These fucking thighs.”

“I know hug-huge.” You hiccup when you feel his teeth slightly nip at you, making your body flinch as you feel his fingers curl under your underwear and start to pull down. He sat up, his board muscular body was somehow still crouched onto the leather seat tha your large body was squashed on. He looked down at you and he started to pull your underwear all down, lifting your hips and you look to see a slight glare on his face.

“I hope you mean that in a good way, cause I love how huge your thighs are. Would love to die between them.” His words had your eyes staring up at them, your lips parted as suddenly your underwear was thrown onto the ground. Your legs pushing closed suddenly making him huff as he looked at you. “Seriously, I love them. I've seen them twice in real life, and I legit died both times. So open up, and let me help you relax.” his hand pushes your legs apart again, you watch as his tongue once again sweeps over his lips as he fives down, his tongue licking upwards making your body shutter as he lets out a deep groan. His arms wrapped around your thighs, holding them down as his tongue kept licking, then he swirled the soft muscle around your clit making your hips jolt upwards. The sound of the chair moving, scraping against the floor when they moved, it had your cheeks heating up even more than they already were. You hand pressing against your lips as the other wraps around the blanket that was now bunches at your stomach.

Looking down all you could see was the back of his head, your stomach slightly in the way, making embarrassment swarm around your chest as you let out a whine. The embarrassment dissipates when suddenly jungkook lips wrap around your clit, it makes your hips lift as you hear a slurping sound having your whimper, fighting back moans.  The feeling of one of his hands moving away from your thigh as you hold your eyes open as you lift your hand, finally getting a glimpse of his dark eyes staring at you for a split second as you feel a warm finger pad against your pulsing entrance. Jungkook suddenly pulls his face away from you, sitting slightly up, though the sound of his shoe hitting the floor had you looking to see one of his legs now holding him up as the other was bent under him. Looking at his face you see drool and your essences smeared across his bright pink and swollen lips and his chin.  Suddenly the feeling of his warm, slightly rough finger pushing into you had you velvet wall clenching marking his already glissing parted lips fall completely open, jaw slacked as a gruttled moan escapes his chest.

“Fucking hell..dliosus and the way your grip my finger..fuck.” He all but whined as he leaned back down, the feeling of his finger moving in and out, as the lewd sound filled your senses. It had your hand reaching down to his hair as his tongue suddenly swirled around your clit again, your lips being held closed by your teeth as he glared at you. Pulling away as you whine softly, shaking your head as you try to bring his face back down, his finger still moving inside of you, another suddenly slipping in as your back lifted off of the leather. The sound of your butt unsticking from the leather along with a grunt from Jungkook as you head twisted to the side. “Moan, let it out. Stop being quiet.” He grumbled, rapidly moving his finger up and down as well as slightly sliding in and out of you. Your eyes peek over to look at him as you whine, your hand dropping from his hair onto your thigh, fingers brushing his arms that were still wrapped around you, holding you large thigh open.

“Jungko-kook..seriously.” You whined eyes glancing to the closed door behind him, the mirror next to it giving the fantastic view of his tight jean clad ass and large, flexing, thighs. Looking away from the mirror you look at his face, his large dark doe like eyes staring at you. The hungry look had you whimpering as you watched his head lean down, lips wrapping around your clit once more. You felt the pleasurable pulsing feeling building up into your stomach, it had you letting out a deep moan making him humm against you. The feeling had you almost crying out as the wet sound of his finger moving inside of you, curling upwards, having your hips jolting again and again. The sound of him groaning again as your hand wrapped around his arm that was wrapped around your thigh, had him sliding it slightly back to your hand was on top of his. Fingers intertwined with his knuckles, squeezing as tight as you could as you felt your toes start to curl, knees bending upwards, foot hooking around his shoulder bringing him closer in. The vibrating warm feeling pulsing into your veins had your eyes tightly closing as you let out a loud moan, a cry following as his name slipped past your lips again and again as your oragasm was pulled out of you.

The overstimulated feeling was suddenly spreading across you, it was slightly painful but it had your chest padily moving up and down as he pulled his mouth from you again. His eyes look at your face as his fingers pull out of you, his wet lips suddenly pushing against yours as you let out another moan against his, your arms wrapping around his shoulders. His tongue sliding, pushing, into your mouth as you slowly let your legs fall completely open as one of his hands land onto the top of your thigh as his hips press agains yours. The feeling of his rough jeans rubbing lightly against your sensitive pussy, your swollen clit throbbing as you whine when you move your hips up into him.

“Fuck baby, got me so hard.” he mubled agasin your lips, forehead pressed again yours as you hear and feel him slightly slip and fall against you. You could help the laugh that pushed past your chest as your arms tighten around him. “You look so fucking beaufiful when you came, like fuck want to see that every day.” His words had your heart rapidly beating against your chest, you felt his lips pressing away from your lips to your jaw. His lips brushing against your skin in sloppy kisses, the feeling of his teeth scraping against your skin as he stops behind your ear, having your finger curl into his top as you whine into his ear. “Wanna fuck you so bad.”

“Then why don't you.” he pulled back in surprise as he looked down at you, a wild hungry look in his eyes as he felt your hips jolt back up into you. He watched as your hand, though covered by your sweater, had him almost melting at the look of your chubby finger peaking past the grey sweater. It had his arms slightly shaking as your hand cupped around his bulge, the slight damp feeling from you grinding up into him. “Fuck your so hard.” Your words had his lower lip curling  between his teeth as he looked down at you, the feeling of your hand squeezing against him, slightly pushing and rubbing too had his whole being heated up.

“Fuck..if you dont stop I really will ruine you for anyone else. Everyone in the shop is gonne  know who this fucking jusicy pussy belongs too, who this fucking plush body belongs too. I fuck you, you are mine.” His words were full of a possessive tone, his words just as if not more possessive. It had you shivering as you looked up to his face. “I'm being serious Y/n.”

“Fuck me then.” Within a second he was off of you, pants and underwear off as he sat in his chair. You had heard the sound of his jeans and belt hitting against the floor as you looked over at him. His tattooed hand wrapped around his cock, which had your legs pressing togher, mouth slightly watering. Though he was a bit longer than average, it was how thick he was that made you want to beg. ‘Fuck.” You mumble, his free hand patting his thigh as he slowly sat up, looking over at the black leather chair you were laid out on, a wet patch was.

It had embarrassment fill your soul, and suddenly a thought of how many other girls had been bewitched by the tattooed god in front of you had your chest slightly tightening. Though you push it away when you look back over to see his jaw slack as he looks at you, you decies instead of sitting on top of his thighs like he was hinting he wanted you to drop to your knees. His eyes widened when your hand moved, sweater pushed back as you leaned forward. If this was all you were gonna get from him, you were gonna make sure he never would forget you.

You let some drool drip pass your lips onto the tip of his cock, eyes looking up at him as you press a kiss to his tip. It had his thighs tensing as your lips parted, his hand left his cock as his head tilted back as you slightly sucked at the tip. It had his hip jolting upwards as you slowly took him further and further, the stretch of his cock inside of your mouth burned your cheeks slightly. It had your pussy clenching in anticipation of how the stretch of him inside of you would feel, it had you growing more and more wet, the need to cum again filling your body.

The feeling of tears building up in your eyes as you look up at him, already seeing his half closed eyes on you as you felt yourself slightly gagged. Blinking you pull off of him with a pop, as you take a deep breath in, his hand moving to the back of your head pushing you back to the head of his cock, the probe at your mouth as you gasp as it pushes against your lips. The slight bitter and tart taste of his percum that was dripping out of his tip, lips wrapping around him once more as his hips jolted upwards, having him slip all the way to the back of your throat.

“Tap my thigh when you need to breathe three times.” his words had you humming against him, looking up at him you saw his eyes almost roll back at the sight of you. Hair bunched up at the back of your head in his hand, lips a bright pink and some massacre bunching under your eyes from the tears that were dripping past your eyes. The feeling of you bobbing against him as you suck again and against him, it had him moaning deeply, loudly as you were suddenly pushed down. Comepley flushed against him, you felt yourself choking gasping for air, but you tried to take a breath from your nose. Though Jungkoook enjoyed the sound and feeling of you choking on his cock he wanted you moaning on it. So he suddenly pulled you off making your hands that were latched against his thigh let go as you dropped to the floor. Gasping for breath as you look up at him, coughing as his hand grabbed you shoulder pulling you up and into his lap. Arms wrapped around your waist as his nose nuzzled against your temple, your legs though slightly bent were hanging off of the chair. Legs too big to actually stay on the chair, though at this moment you could care less. Jungkook was comforting you, reassuring you that you were doing amazing and it had your eyes closing as you leaned into him.

“You did so well, pretty girl. My pretty girl is doing so so well, do you think you could handle riding my cock?” His words were a whisper against your ear, your head snuggling against his shoulder as you kept taking deep breaths, the feeling of his cock brushing against your sweater had you whining as you pulled your head back. Hand moving to cup his cheek as your lips pressed against his making him hum as the feeling of him lifting your slight, the warm feeling of his cock brushing against your lip had you shuttering. You pull your lip away from him as he looks at you, your lips parted as your forehead pressed together.  “Fuck you feel so wet and warm already. I can't wait to be inside of you.” His  words had you pinning against him, as you felt him moving himself as you huffed at him.

“Please, please.” You mumble, eyes closing as you feel his bulbous head pushing against you gapping entrance. You feel his hands keeping you in place when you try to push yourself down onto him, it has you whining as one of your hands pulls at the hair at the nap of his neck. “Please.”

“Please, what pretty girl?” his question had you whining as you nudge your nose against his painting.

“Fuck me.” Your words had him chucking as one of his hands moved to your jaw making you nussle into the palm of his hand as he pushed you down making you jaw drop open. The stretch had your head falling forward, forehead pressing against his cheek as he let out a growl against your ear. The burning feeling had you shuttering as you felt your body go almost limp as you felt him bottom out. Eyes opening you look down, your breast and stomach somewhat in the way of your view, you didn't really care as you saw his stomach tighten against his shirt as your hand trailed from his neck down his chest to his abs. You felt them flex, as your hand pushed the shirt upwards, his breathing catching as your hand pressed against his warm skin.

“Ride me.” His words had you nod as you looked up at him, hand still spread across his stomach as you placed your feet somewhat flat against the floor, moving up and then going back down. Your movements were slow yet it had him and your cursing as his thick warm cock moved in and out of you. One of his hands landed on to the top of your thigh, looking you see the purple stenzel he had placed was smeared and was smearing even more as his hand gripped at your thigh. It had you moaning as you looked back up at him, his other hand resting on your back as you kept moving. Suddenly the stinging feeling of his hand smacking against your ass had you letting out a cry as you pulled your hand from his stomach. When you lift it back to wrap around his shoulder he smashes his lips against yours as you feel his hand gripping your ass, squeezing and kneading as you moan against his lips.

“Fuck.” You whine against his lips as you feel him thrust up into you the chair slightly moving from below the two of you making you gasp you you both almost fall making the two of you stop your movement. Eyes meeting one another as laughter tumbled past your lips, his hands cupping against your hips as he looked at you with a small smile as you giggled at him. One of your sweater covered hands cupping your mouth as you look at him.

“St-stop.” he laughs as his hands cup your jaw as you look at him with a tilt of your head as he brings you back in to kiss him again. “Everytime you laugh you clench around me.” His words had more laughter building as you tried to fight it, it had him groaning as he shakes his head at you. “Y/n.” He mumbles with a frown on his face, though it was a playful one from what you could tell with the gleam in his eyes.

“Sorry?” You wonder when his hips jolt back up again making you moan as you feel him move inside of your head falling into your neck.The feeling of him nipping and suckling at the skin of your neck making you skin shiver as you let out a breathy moan. “Also I think I'm too big for this chair.”

“Too big?” he wonders, his head pulling away from your neck and looking at you with raised eyebrows, your head nodding softly as he tutted at you. Suddenly you were lifted and flipped around, bent over the table you were once sitting on. His cock slipped back into you as he started to thrust into you once more. Though this time the angle was much different, and he seemed to be able to fill all of you, the stretch was new. Even slightly painful as he almost seemed to bruise his hip with how hard he was thrusting into you. “If anything is too big here, its my fucking cock. You are so fucking tight around me, almost as if you arent enjoying me fucking you.” his words had you shaking your head as quickly as those words left his lips. You feel drool pooling out of your mouth as one of your arms bent behind you, hand open as his hand laced with yours.

“Love you cock.” Your words had him freezing for a split second making you whine when you felt your second orgasm slowly disappearing as you feel his free hand kneading at your ass. “Jungkook please move.” you begged your hand squeezing his as he suddenly pulled out and snapped back into you, the sound of skin slapping had your eyes closing, cause he kept the pace he had started with. The pace was mind blowing, with how hard he was thrusting against you again and again, the feel of him going in and out again and again has your free hand gripping the edge of the table.

“Fuck pretty girl, love the way you ass jiggles everytime I thrust into you.” His words had you pinning as you felt your toes curl again, thigh tensing as you felt heat build in the pit of your stomach. The heat started to spread through your veins as you let out a moan of his name again making a chuckle pass his lips. “What are you gonna cum again? Is my pretty girl gonna cum on my cock?”  You clenched around him as your vision went white, crying out from him to keep going. “Where do you want me to cum?” He growled, chest pressing against your back, now both of your hands laced together above your head. His question had you whining as you turned your head to the side and looked to see his eyes one you. His lips pressing against your cheek as he kept moving, though every other thrust he would pause before thrusting back into you.

“Inside me.” You hear him let out a shuddered breath as you feel him still inside of you as you whine when you feel his warm breath against your cheek.

“You sure pretty girl?” he wondered making you nod as you looked at him and whine again and again as you let out a small cry.

“Please, cum inside of me.” Your words had him smiling down at you, one of his hands moving to lift your jaw and press a sloppy wet kiss against you.

“Fuck youre perfect.” His words had you pinning as he started to move his hips again, his lips still sloppy kissing you as you felt him snap against you again and again. The groans he was letting out were deep, and came out with each brutal thrust he did. Soon he all but growled against your lips as the feeling of his warm cum painting your walls had your body shivering at the feeling as you let out a huff of breath. His lips move against yours again, as you whine against him as he pulls out. “Such a mess.” His words had you painting as you dropped against the table, the feeling of his fingers pressing against your entrance pushing into you again making you whine and try to get away from the overactivity.

“Stop.” You whine making him chuckle as he pulled from you, a smack to your ass had you yelping, swatting behind you to try to move as you heard him chuckle.

“Gonna clean everything up, then..do you still want to get tattooed?” His question had you shrugging as you felt something against your cunt whipping, making your thighs shake. “If not that fine, I can always do private sessions at my place or yours.”

“Like a date?” You mumble, a teasing tone as he moves to flip you and move to have you sit back onto the table. His red cheeks look at you as he takes a deep breath in, hand moving to the back of his neck.

“Maybe..I mean yes. A date.” His words were direct and to a point as his hand cupped your cheek and pressed a kiss to your lips. “I want to take you out now actually..maybe go back to my place and watch T.v or something.” His words were whispered, he seemed nervous and it had you tilting your head as you wrap your arms around his waist.

“I mean you did just fuck the life out of me, so I really do expecat a cuddle session.” Your words had him smiling as he buried his head into your neck. “Too bad about the tattoo though.”

“I gave you two toe curling orgasms.”

“But Freddy Kruger looked cool.” Your words were teasing as he pulled away, pouting at you making you chuckle as you cup his cheeks. “Food then cuddles, then you are tattooing my thigh as soon as possible.”

“You're only gonna see me for tattoos.”

“I'll still pay you….your tips just gonna be sex.” You words had him throwing his head back as you both froze at the knock on the door.

“You own us a new fucking chair Jungkook!” A voice calls through, a teasing tone as you bury your head into his chest as you feel him chuckle. The sound clamming you as you look up at him his cheeks and the tips of his ears were a bright red as he looked down at you.

“Whatever!” He calls out as you feel his lips pressing at the top of your head, “So what do you want to eat?”

⊹₊ ⋆ “fill me, fill you, I got some love, feel me, feel you, I got some love,”

TAGS — boyfriend!taehyung, domesticity, spoon fuck, porn with tiny to no plot, fluff, ptd las vegas setting <3

WORD COUNT — 2 k

Las Vegas at night is so pretty, you think, the hotel has a beautiful view of the strip below and you like seeing the lights of the cars moving in and out of the streets. You can hear music being played from afar and hear the cheers of drunk people on the street as people go on and live their night life.

The moonlight shines through the glass and pours into the room. It's dimly lit and the room is quiet save for the sounds of people down below and the occasional hotel guest passing by the door. As for you, you're caught up in Taehyung's tight hold as he sleeps behind you pressed closely.

Taehyung had been utterly drained after the concert so the two of you went back to unwind. You both had a nice shower, ate some food, and cuddled whilst watching random Netflix shows. You'd say it was a pretty chill night in.

At some point you both fall asleep huddled close together with Taehyung spooning you from the back. You find comfort in his arms and snuggle closer out of habit. You both joked about how the both of you seem to have separation anxiety. Hence the reason you always sleep close together no matter the place.

You open your bleary eyes at one point in the night. You're confused as to why you woken up but make no move to get out of bed. You couldn't even if you wanted to because Taehyung's got his arms tightly wound around you. You reach over blindly for your phone and check the time.

"Two am?" You mumble, hissing when the brightness of your phone blinds you.

The TV is still on in the background and you're just laying there trying to figure out whether you want to go back to sleep or not. It's hot under the covers and you feel very uncomfortable given that Taehyung's the main source of all this heat. You wiggle away a little, huffing as you shove the comforter down and kick your legs out.

Taehyung grunts in his sleep, arm blindly trying to bring you back in. You lay there relishing in the cool air that feels so good against your hot skin. Maybe it wasn't fair to put the whole blame on Taehyung.. you were wearing his hoodie and warm fuzzy socks (in your defense these socks were extremely soft on your feet).

You manage to stumble out of bed (you don't have a clue how) and do minuscule things like go pee and get a glass of water. You come back minutes later, remote in hand intending to watch a little bit of TV now that you're more awake. Taehyung's awake in bed now too, eyes adjusting to the small amount of light from the TV as he sits there confused.

"Where did you go?" He rasps out.

"Was too hot." You simply reply and climb back into bed with him.

Taehyung flops back down and lays his arm across as he waits for you to get back in his arms. You shuffle closer and curl up against him with your eyes set on the TV. You can tell he's just as awake as you are now, he must have cut off any drowsiness and woken up just now.

You remain in pure silence just watching an episode of the show that's on and Taehyung just resting his eyes as he hums quietly. He gently strokes your back in a comforting manner. He goes from the top of your head all the way down to your back.

Truthfully you don't feel it given that you're in his thick hoodie. His little show of affection doesn't last long because he's letting his hand drop down to your ass. He cups a cheek with his large hand and gives it a gentle but firm squeeze.

"Tae." You mumble and reach back to swat his hand away.

Taehyung gives a closed eye smile as he cheekily runs his fingertip along your thigh. He goes up until his finger slides under the hem of your shorts and circles around the flesh of your ass cheek. You huff softly, giving in because he's probably in one of his moods now.

"I thought you were tired." You softly tease.

Taehyung doesn't answer straight away, he's playing around in there as he gently smacks the palm of his hand on your ass. He likes the feeling of your soft flesh rippling/jiggling in return. You hear him audibly swallow, adams apple bobbing in a way that has you staring.

His touch alone is enough to get you going but the fact that you're both so pressed up together has you weak. You're imagining all the things you could be doing right about now as your panties grow hot and your clit throbs just a little. Him playing with your ass doesn't help either.

"I was," Taehyung finally answers, "but now I'm bored." Code word for: I'm horny now.

You pout to yourself and quietly go back to watching your show. Your silence is taken as a 'go on' on his behalf as he scans your adorable face for any signs of discomfort. Once given a (subtle) green light he goes back to teasing you and just letting his hands run over your body.

Taehyung manages to grip the waistband of your shorts and tug them down. He pats your thigh and you aid him in sliding them off, you're left in your favorite pair of panties—frilly and cute. Taehyung runs his hands up and down your bare thigh, occasionally cupping your ass and giving it a gentle squeeze.

"Fuck," he swore quietly, "you brought them." He mumbled and played with the elastic band of your panties.

"They're comfy." You softly whisper and bury your face deeper into his chest. "Tae... please..?"

"I got you baby." Taehyung gently moves you to the opposite side of him, facing the TV as he slides up behind you.

You feel Taehyung up against your back as he spoons you once more like before. Your breath hitches when he dips his hand into your panties, his cold fingers press up against your soft folds. He runs them up and down, collecting some slick before using that to flick your sensitive clit.

"Ohh.." You moan softly, there's a low squelch in the background as his slippery finger rubs over your clit in quick motions.

Taehyung is breathing a little more shallow against your ear, his fingers move faster along your sensitive pussy. Occasionally he pushes his fingers in but doesn't fuck you with them, instead he pulls them back out and circles the wet digits around your clit.

The slide is so slippery you barely feel much stimulation but the occasional tingle down there. You whine impatiently and push your ass back against his hips, "Stop teasing," you whine.

"Teasing? Just getting you ready for my cock baby." He lowly grunts in your ear.

You bite your lip and reach behind you to stroke over his hard bulge, "I don't need to prep, can take you like that. Want it to hurt a little." You softly breathe out.

“You sure?” Taehyung doesn’t stop his ministrations as he continues to coax more wetness out of you. He’s unsure if he even wants to listen since he doesn’t want you to be hurting the next day. “Just a few more seconds baby,”

You suppress the urge to huff and throw a mini fit, but a part of you knows if you take him like that you won’t be walking at all. Taehyung gently fingers you open, sliding two fingers knuckles deep as he pumps them in and out at a slow pace.

He leans down to spread soft kisses down your neck, sticking to one spot he usually likes to leave his marks on. Your hand shakily slips into his shorts, mouth watering when your hand comes into contact with his throbbing cock. You gently grip him, stroking him slowly since it’s a dry fit.

“Fuck baby,” Taehyung pants as he moves his fingers faster, “eager to get fucked?”

“Please,” you bite your lip and cup his balls, “can’t wait anymore ‘m drippin’ for you..”

Taehyung grunts softly and manages to push his cock out of his boxers, the material sitting just under his balls. He doesn’t bother to fully strip them off and manages to snap your panties to the side where they dig into your fat ass cheek. “Hold yourself open for me,” he breathes out and strokes his cock with a free hand.

You bury your face in the pillow and reach behind you to hold yourself open for him. He curses at the sight of your glistening pussy, hole winking back at him as if it were calling out to him. You feel him moments later pressing into you, cock breaching the rim as he slowly pushes himself in.

Your mouth falls open and no sound escapes you. He’s stuffed deep inside, pussy feeling full and stretched out despite his small prep session. You grip the pillow tightly and squirm just a little as he bottoms out with a wet slap!

“Shit… did so good for me,” he mumbles out and strokes over your thigh idly, “gonna move now okay?”

“P-Please,” you softly moan.

He slowly works his hips back, cock sliding smoothly due to the excess slick your pussy gushed out beforehand. He gripped your hip tightly, holding you steady and firmly whilst he pumped his hips back and forth. Taehyung was softly panting against your ear as he rolled his hips quickly.

“So fucking good,” he moans out quietly, “fuck, you’re so wet for me.” He groans.

There’s an audible wet smacking noise every time he bottoms out inside of you. His balls slap against you in tandem with his thrusts and it makes you mewl quietly. Your toes are curled from how good this angle is, how full you feel. His cock does nothing but make you see stars.

“Taehyung–” you choke up, “r-right there,” you squirm and push back against him to meet his thrusts.

Taehyung hisses softly when your pussy tightens around him, “Shit baby loosen up, can’t move like this.” He said, grinding his hips into you and moving in figure of eights.

You whimper loudly and manage to relax a little so he could move more freely. You’re meeting him thrust for thrust as the bed shuffles with your intense movements. The TV is long forgotten now as soft moans and grunts travel through the now humid room. It stinks like sex and you’re both panting now.

He scoots forward to shove into you hard, hand tightening on your hip as he uses it as leverage. “y/n,” he moans out as his head flops on to the pillow and sighs in pleasure, “oh fuck baby I’m gonna cum.”

“I’m–mmm–close too,” you reach down shakily to rub at your clit in fast circles.

The desperation in your sloppy movements only bring your orgasm closer and closer. It comes barreling into you, your pussy quivers and throbs around his cock. More wetness coats his cock and creates a lewd squelching mess between the two of you. Taehyung’s mouth falls open as he mindlessly ruts into you for a few more minutes.

A guttural groan leaves him, hips stilling as he cums deep inside. His cock throbs for the duration of his orgasm and he’s left shaky and breathing harshly. “Shit,” he sighs, “shit.” Slowly he pulls out of you, watching as his soft cock slips out alongside a string of his cum and your cum.

You pant softly into the pillow, eyes closed and thighs shaky. The room is quiet save for your soft panting and Taehyung’s labored breathing. You both lay there bonelessly, too tired to get up and clean yourselves. The events of the day before catch up and once again you’re both tired out.

“I love you.” He softly speaks into the quiet room.

A tiny smile forms on your lips, “.. I love you too.”

here i come | jjk. (m)

➵ summary :  tipsy hide-and-seek turns into more when you and jeon jungkook choose the same closet to hide in.

➵ pairing : jungkook x reader

➵ genre :  college!au, smut, pwp

➵ rating : 18+

➵ word count : 3k

➵ warnings : sexual content, teasing, swearing, mentions of alcohol, tipsy but both parties are able to consent, dirty talk, breast fondling, fingering, bigdick!jungkook cause wbk, penetrative sex, unprotected sex (wrap it up lovelies) mentions of oral, slight name kink, begging, creampie

➵ a/n: i’ve always wanted to try this idea with jungkook and i finally have!! he just seems so perfect for this scenario. as always, your comments and feedback are appreciated! enjoy :)

↳ *read the second part!*

“32!..31!..30!..”

Dammit, you had 30 seconds left and had just made it to the second floor, cheeks flushed from running around and the slight buzz of alcohol making your insides giddy.

Rushing towards the first room that came into sight, you barge in panicked as Taehyung reaches 25 seconds.

Seguir leyendo

IMPORTANT!! DO THIS IF YOU KEEP WANT TO SEE SMUT FICTIONS!!

Firstly if you’re a writer and see this, please reblog to spread awareness and if you’re a reader, please reblog to support your favorite content creators!!

So the other day, I made a poll to see how many of smut fiction readers was aware of the community labeling issue, that me and some fellow writers have been dealing with

As you can see approximately 1/3 of readers still don’t know about smut works getting labeled, which means they have no idea some fictions don’t even show up in the tags for them. Here is how to fix this issue, please spread by reblogging!!

For android users

(Everyone say thank you @forjongseong for helping me with the pictures)

Open the tumblr app on your phone, if you don’t have the app, open up tumblr web page and follow the steps that I explained on for the IOS users part.

After you open up the app, follow the steps shown on the pictures below

Click on the small person figure at the bottom of your dash and go to your own page,

Click on settings and then account settings,

Then scroll until you see “contents you see”,

After you click on “contents you see”, change your settings to “show” for both mature and s€xual themes

And voila, you’ll never miss out on smut again!

For IOS users

Tumblr app on IOS doesn’t allow us to change the settings for the contents we see, so you must change it manually on pc!! Here is how you do it:

First log into your account and you will see this small person figure on the first picture, on the top left corner.

Click on it and then click on the settings.

After your setting page opens, scroll down on the page and you will see community label settings. (Second picture)

All you have to do is to click “show” for both mature and s€xual themes, and you will never have to worry about missing a smut work again!

colour me in: unhindered | jjk (m)

Summary: Half of him inhabits a beast; the other part is made of colours of suspiciously peaceful gardens. And you, no matter how fierce, will take all of what he grants you.

➳ pairing: Jungkook x reader ➳ rating: 18+ ➳ genre: fwb/f2l, college au; fluff, lots of smut ➳ warnings: oof. okay, bickering, oc a bit bitchy at first, jk is a little shit, eating ramen together <3, most of this is smut so… explicit sexual content: oral (f. & m. receiving), fingering, cockwarming, sloppy making out, quite a few positions, some spanking, spit, manhandling, unprotected sex, rough sex, pet names, big dick jk, dom jk, teasing, multiple orgasms, some choking, consent, squirting, he likes her tiddies and ass, praising, some thigh grinding, the good kinda crying, aftercare, showering together <3 ➳ word count: 12.2k ➳ a/n: this is a flashback !! please ignore how shitty the banner looks LOL i forgot i had to make one :’) but enjoy this piece of filth and let me know your thoughts once you’re done !! ALSO !!! this is part of my series colour me in, but this chapter can fully be read as a stand-alone. no knowledge required, just rivals f*cking !! <3 ➳ listen to: love on the brain by rihanna | full (collaborative) playlist 🤍

SERIES MASTERPOST | TAGLIST MASTERLIST | WIPs

There’s a limit to insolence. And what’s enough is enough.

Seguir leyendo

colour me in: unhindered | jjk (m)

Summary: Half of him inhabits a beast; the other part is made of colours of suspiciously peaceful gardens. And you, no matter how fierce, will take all of what he grants you.

➳ pairing: Jungkook x reader ➳ rating: 18+ ➳ genre: fwb/f2l, college au; fluff, lots of smut ➳ warnings: oof. okay, bickering, oc a bit bitchy at first, jk is a little shit, eating ramen together <3, most of this is smut so… explicit sexual content: oral (f. & m. receiving), fingering, cockwarming, sloppy making out, quite a few positions, some spanking, spit, manhandling, unprotected sex, rough sex, pet names, big dick jk, dom jk, teasing, multiple orgasms, some choking, consent, squirting, he likes her tiddies and ass, praising, some thigh grinding, the good kinda crying, aftercare, showering together <3 ➳ word count: 12.2k ➳ a/n: this is a flashback !! please ignore how shitty the banner looks LOL i forgot i had to make one :’) but enjoy this piece of filth and let me know your thoughts once you’re done !! ALSO !!! this is part of my series colour me in, but this chapter can fully be read as a stand-alone. no knowledge required, just rivals f*cking !! <3 ➳ listen to: love on the brain by rihanna | full (collaborative) playlist 🤍

SERIES MASTERPOST | TAGLIST MASTERLIST | WIPs

There’s a limit to insolence. And what’s enough is enough.

Seguir leyendo

THE HATING GAME - JJK

working together with your biggest competition was not something you saw yourself doing often. but fucking him one late night at office? never in a million years.

pairing — jungkook x female reader

genre — angst, smut

word count — 7.2k

warnings/tags — lawyer!jk x lawyer!reader, enemies2lovers, dom!jk, sub!reader, swearing, provocation, insults, petty arguing, vague mentions of murder/strangulation, jealousy, teasing, lying, denial, tension x100, improvisation, touching, so much sarcasm, explicit smut, light bondage, grinding, neck kisses, nipple play, tit slapping, begging, fingering, dirty talk, degradation, oral (m and f receiving), cunnilingus, choking, spitting, pussy slapping, tongue fucking, dick slapping (face), edging, crying, slapping (like once), spanking, penetrative sex, vaginal sex, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it guys), light pain kink, finger sucking, angry fucking, creampie, making out, cum eating, post-nut clarity, both very lost and confused by the end.

paired with this edit made by yours truly 🤭

a/n: hello and welcome to jahanara feeding into her office romance fantasies pt98583616 😭 please enjoy this very long and drawn out piece (similar to illicit desire) but more detailed, more descriptive and can be read as a stand-alone.

if you came from tiktok, hello and welcome to the dark side 😁 enjoy the long-awaited lawyer!jk au!

btw this fic has nothing to do with the book/movie called ‘the hating game’ the name just fit this ok 🙄

“We need to talk,” Jungkook’s voice causes your chest to falter as he enters his office, waiting for you to enter before shutting the door behind you and making home on the seat behind his desk.

“We can’t do this case.”

If you could burst out laughing right now, you would, but this was a professional work environment, “You invite me into your office, distracting me from my own work, just to tell me something I already know?” You make yourself comfortable in the seat opposite his, paying him a fake smile, “I don’t know why you’re panicking, we can easily get out of this. We can just say we have too much on our plate to take on a new case. There, done,” you shrug, leaning back in the seat without a care in the world.

Mr Jeon, your boss, thought it’d be a good idea to pair you up with Jungkook to work on a class case.

Why he’d even make that decision was beyond you. Neither of you got along well, trying too hard to one-up each other, spewing insults back and forth like there was no tomorrow. Failure to work well together in this case, you were both threatened with temporary suspension.

“Yeah, you’re forgetting one thing,” he says.

“What’s that?”

“My dad owns the fucking place.”

Yeah, your boss happened to be Jungkook’s dad, and honestly, it wasn’t such a bad thing. He was treated the same way as the other employees, sometimes a bit worse when it came to you.

You were his favourite employee, the absolute star of his team.

“He’s handed our current cases to another attorney so we can focus on this,” Jungkook groans, getting out of his seat to pace around your office as if he were going through a midlife crisis. He halts after a little dilly-dallying, “We should just take the suspension.”

"Pardon you, but I've got bills to pay, and I can't be having that suspension show up on my job record," you try to reason with him, but Jungkook didn't look very convinced. "Think about it this way…” you trail off, leaving your seat behind your desk to head over to him, standing confident in front of him, “When you're suspended, you're pretty much fired for an unfixed period.”

You were willing to work with Jungkook, just to get this whole thing out of the way, and there was only one way to get him on board.

Provoking him.

“I’m sure the Jeon Jungkook doesn’t wanna get suspended by his own daddy, right?” you taunt him, your voice getting quieter with each word.

Jungkook knew you were messing with him, and hated how you actually got under his skin, but with a defeated sigh, he agrees, “Fine, let’s win this case. How about we work on it over at your place? I’m sure you’ve got no plans for the weekend,” he scoffs, cocking a brow at your overly-confident form.

“I actually have a date this weekend,” you shrug, turning your back towards him ready to take your leave. “We can work on it later tonight, I’m leaving now.”

A date? There’s no way…

Jungkook is quick to rush to the door, blocking you from opening the door just as you reach out for the door knob. His arms were extended out to his sides, stopping you from leaving.

He needed to know who this guy was and why the hell he would go on a date with you of all people. “A date? Someone actually wants to sit and have dinner with you?” he questions, like it was the craziest thing he’d ever heard. “He’s gotta be deaf or blind.”

Now, with shit like this, you’d walk away, but Jungkook rendered you trapped in his office, “Listen you conceited asshole,” your index fingers goes to jab at his chest and you have to force yourself to ignore how built he was under his shirt, “I don’t like you. Never have, never will. We’re all a bit different outside of work but I’ve restricted you from seeing that side of me because you don’t deserve it.”

It was a simple and truthful explanation, you hated Jungkook beyond words, neither of you had a relationship outside of the firm. Your work persona would definitely not attract a guy with how much of a workaholic you were.

You needed this date, as a break from all the hardships these cases brought you.

Jungkook pondered your words carefully. Maybe he was a bit iffy about not having a relationship with you outside of work, he didn’t wanna be just a “work colleague” or that “annoying guy from work. He had way too much pride for that.

“Now if you could please stop hogging the door, that would be great. I don’t think I wanna spend another minute with you in your office.”

“Likewise, Y/N,” Jungkook sneers as he steps away from the door. It doesn't even register to either of you that this could be counted as an argument. How easily you both bumped heads with each other would have to come to a stop now that Mr Jeon was keeping a keen eye on you two.

As the day comes to night, you were still locked away in your office, reading away at your newly appointed case details and taking brief notes. The details were… gory to say the least, and exceptionally hard to read, but being a lawyer, you’d gotten used to it, having read the worst of the worst during your career. It was pretty much a skill to read such gruesome and ill details of murders, kidnappings and assaults with a straight face.

You were lucky not to be the only one reading up on gore so late at night, Jungkook waltzing through your office without knocking (as he always did) with a cup of coffee in his hand. He doesn’t say a word and instead sets the cup on your desk and takes a seat opposite you.

You thought you were seeing things.

Jeon Jungkook buying you coffee? That’s a first.

You don’t say anything, reaching out for the cup and bringing it close to your lips, about to take a sip, but you stop.

“You didn’t poison it, did you?”

As the man was getting comfortable in his seat, he deadpans, “Seriously? What am I, five?”

“Mmm, you act like it,” you mumble, shrugging your shoulders and taking a sip of the coffee anyway.

Thankfully, you were still up and alive.

“Have you had a look at the case yet? It’s a lot of information,” Jungkook says absentmindedly, shoving his hands into his pockets as he propped his feet up onto your desk; a move you’d witnessed on so many occasions, you’d gotten too tired to reprimand him for it.

You set the cup down and speculate over the mess of paper on your desk with a sigh, “Yeah.. I think it might be the hardest we’ve gotten yet.”

You pull out a photo of the crime scene from under the file, sliding it towards him.

It was a very clear image of strangulation on the victim, faded blood and marks of red around the victim’s neck.

All caused by his own father.

“So what are we? Defence or Prosecution?” You’d usually decide this part on your own, but you wanted to hear his thoughts first and ensure he was on the same page as you.

“Easy,” his eyes dip down to your desk, analysing the photo, “We’re defence,” he decides with no hesitation, pulling on his tie to loosen it slightly around his collar.

“What? You wanna go Defence? Seriously?” You thought prosecuting would be the most obvious route to take seeing as the evidence pointed towards the father of the victim being the obvious murderer.

“I spoke with Jimin about it earlier and he also thinks Defence would be the easier route for us.”

“Oh, so it’s just Jimin’s word against mine now?” you arch a brow at him, tilting your head to the side, awaiting a bullshit answer from him.

From the tone of your voice, Jungkook knew you were slowly getting worked up, and quite frankly, there was too much at stake to be arguing when the case hadn’t even started yet. “You know what, we’ll be the Prosecution if it shuts you up.”

As long as you got what you wanted.

“So who’s taking you on a date this weekend?”

Jungkook’s sudden question surprised you. You couldn’t think of one valid reason as to why he cared.

“Um, you probably don’t know him, but his name is Jung Hoseok—”

“—I know him.”

Of course Jungkook knew him; the pair went to law school together but parted ways after Hoseok got a job as a district attorney in the states.

He only returned a couple years back after becoming a legal director at their opposing law firm.

You regretted giving away Hoseok’s name. Now that Jungkook, your absolute nemesis, knew your potential love interest, he was probably planning to absolutely shit talk you to stop you from finding love to feed his bitter self.

“I know Hoseok pretty well, actually. He’s not really fit to be a boss if I’m being honest,” Jungkook recalls, remembering many times back in law school when leadership roles in team activities were up for grabs and Hoseok would always steer clear of them. “Surprised he’s willing to date a bitch,” he snickers, waiting for you to cuss him out.

“Listen, you’re tired, I’m tired, I don’t wanna talk about who’s a bitch and who’s fit enough to be a boss… and it’s definitely not you.”

“Oh yeah? What does Jung Hoseok have that I don’t?”

“Compassion, respect, authority, control, not to mention, he’s quite the attractive man,” you shrug with a sly smile, continuing to boast about Hoseok and at the moment, Jungkook was regretting even asking in the first place.

He could be all that and more.

“But our relationship isn’t very deeply rooted. We’re not in love or anything, we’ve only been on one date so our relationship is at the minimum right now.”

Jungkook didn’t ask for a dramatic reading of your relationship, and he’d just about heard enough, “Yeah, whatever. Can you cook? You should cook for us this weekend. You know, get the brain juice flowing or whatever it’s called,” he stands up abruptly, stretching his arms above his head before heading over to your couch, slouching against the material as he looks over at you, awaiting an answer.

“Why would I cook for someone I hate?”

“You don’t hate me,” he throws back at you, a sly smirk adorning his features, “You pick fights with me and always get competitive, because when you overcome me, it makes you feel better about yourself.”

You bite down on your bottom lip, pondering his words a little.

Maybe he was right to an extent. Nothing felt better than being put against each other and reigning victorious. Everyone in the firm knew how competitive you both were and always steered clear of any kind of opportunity to compete with you.

You sigh and roll your eyes, “Hmm… Maybe I might just have a thing for you, who knows,” you respond casually, shrugging your shoulders just to mess with him a little. “But that’s what you want, right? Another girl to fawn over you?” you taunt him, keeping your eyes trained on him as you recall the number of women that had bombarded your office earlier today after you were counted ‘lucky’ for working with Jungkook, ‘the most attractive guy in the firm.’

Now that made him fix his posture, sitting up for what could only be the most predictable thing he’d ever heard, “Oh my god, I knew it,” he laughs, almost demeaningly, “Everyone and their mum has a thing for me, you’re no different,” he shook his head in disbelief, a large grin spread across his face. “So that’s why you always argue with me, huh? Just so you can talk to me? That’s cute, especially since it’s you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” you question, slightly offended.

“Because it’s gonna be fun having the Y/N, my biggest competition, falling in love with me, Jeon Jungkook. Imagine all the headlines that would make.”

God, he’s so full of himself.

As much as you hated how egotistical he was, you wanted to continue your little play act, rising to your feet and walking over to Jungkook by the couch and once near enough, you grab the end of his tie, leaning down towards him and pulling him close to your face with a deceitful smile gracing your lips, “Oh Jeon… You’re so smart, I can’t believe you figured me out so quickly…” you whisper, voice as soft as ever and something Jungkook had never heard before.

He couldn’t deny, your hold on his tie was probably the most attractive thing he’d ever witnessed, but he would never flat-out admit it to you.

Jungkook lifts his hand to gently rest against your cheek, merely trying to see just how far you’d go to keep this act up, “Mhm, I bet you like where we are now, don’t you?” he teases, his voice dropping several octaves and matching the volume of what was once your voice, now barely there as your mind went blank and his eyes proceeded to dance between your lips and your eyes.

Your cheeks had heated up drastically under his touch and you weren’t expecting him to make a comeback like that, and you really weren’t prepared to take things any further, but your pride would take a major blow if you backed out now.

Besides, the setting was perfect for that kind of moment; a near empty building, alone in the office, lights dimmed down, both tired and stressed out..

Your lips were mere inches away from his own and you could’ve kissed him if you really wanted to, and maybe, maybe you did want to kiss him—

No, that was the tense air speaking.

Just improvise.

“Mhm, this is exactly what I wanted…” you whisper, giving his tie one last tug till your foreheads were touching, “But I’m sure your hand can make-do in better places, don’t you think?”

Jungkook’s brow twitches, and you almost miss it, but it was enough of a sign to let you know he wasn’t expecting you to keep up. It wasn’t a problem for him though, the man was just as stubborn and prideful as you were, there was absolutely no way in hell he was gonna back down.

Not until you do.

“And what about yours, Y/N?” he challenges, eyes briefly peering down at your hand still gripping on the end of his tie, “I bet you’re really skilled with your hands, aren’t you?”

The real fun begins when the hand that was once resting against your cheek, drops a little lower, making home over the dip of your neck and Jungkook could feel your skin burn under his palm.

Your heart was racing as you discreetly pondered what he meant by that and once you clocked on, your body had stiffened, but you needed to seem unfazed, “Of course I am, probably more skilled than you at this point,” you shrug, gesturing towards his hand near your neck.

If he had the balls, he’d touch you somewhere more scandalous.

“Oh, is that right? You wanna bring my hands further down then, Y/N?”

Jungkook was testing you and your patience. If he thought you were gonna pussy out, he was wrong.

Your left hand grabs onto his wrist, right hand landing flat against his chest as you pushed him back against the sofa, and without even thinking of your next move, you impulsively make home on Jungkook’s lap, straddling his thighs as you adjust yourself on top of him. He watched on, slightly shocked and a little amused at the lengths you were going through just to prove a point.

With your hand wrapped around his wrist, you drag his hand down your body, slowly reaching your chest and stopping, “How about this?” you whisper, your voice on the verge of the faltering.

“Could be better,” he shrugs nonchalantly, sitting up to pull his blazer off his body, leaving it elsewhere and going back to his previous position, “Try this…”

He begins to pull his tie off around his collar, leaving it beside him for later use and then reaching up to unbutton his white dress shirt until hints of skin peeked through, “It’ll be better if you touch me yourself, but I’m sure you already know that since you’re so ‘skilled,” he says, his hands resting over your hips.

How long was Jungkook gonna keep this up? You were running out of ideas and though this was all a game, you couldn't help but feel just the slightest bit turned on, but how couldn’t you? You were sitting on his lap, your near-skintight skirt rolling up your thighs and you were almost certain he could feel the slight throbbing between your legs.

With one hand placed on his shoulder, the other reaching down to slip your hand past his shirt, your palms making direct contact with his built chest, God, you’re all talk,” you roll your eyes, leaning in to whisper against his ear, “Why don't you put your money where your mouth is?”

Jungkook throws his head back, eliciting a low chuckle, eyes meeting yours again as his palms made home on your thighs, squeezing your flesh enough to warm himself up, “If we continue, this won't be a game anymore…” he trails off, trying his absolute hardest to ignore the growing pain of his hardening cock under his slacks, “I won't be able to stop,” he continues, knowing inside he wanted this too, but was more than willing to back off if you seriously didn’t wanna do this, “Is this what you want?”

Fuck, of course you wanted this. Your body needed an output, some kind of relief. Just this once, you were willing to set aside your differences for what, ten minutes of quick relief?

You adjust yourself on his lap, your lace-clad cunt snug above his growing erection and you could've sworn you almost moaned at the contact. "Can you feel that?” you whisper, referring to the throbbing between your legs. "Is that enough of an answer for you?"

"Jesus Y/N," Jungkook nearly groans at the closeness. If he continued this game, he would cross a line that would be hard to come back from, and he was willing and ready to deal with the consequences to come.

With one swift move, he rests his fingers under your chin, tilting your head to the side to make room for his lips to attach to your neck, gently sucking and biting along your untainted neck didn't whilst he kept you distracted by the new sudden feeling of his large hands rocking your hips back and forth over his erection.

You elicit a soft sigh, eyes coming to a gentle shut as you basked in the soft pleasure, your soaked-through panties bound to leave a mark of your mess on top of him.

Jungkook pulls away from your neck, leaning back to admire your state; your cheeks were flushed pink, hair a little messy and a sheer layer of sweat adorning your chest, resulting in your blouse sticking to your body and arched a brow at you, “Take the shirt off for me, will you?”

You don’t hesitate to oblige, unbuttoning your mesh blouse with your eyes solely focused on him, and it seemed Jungkook had the same plan to just stare you down as you pulled the material off your shoulders, your well hidden assets finally coming in to view and Jungkook’s breath had hitched in his throat.

He didn’t know what came over him, or if he was just high in the moment, but you looked absolutely unreal; a simple yet stunning black lace bralette over your chest, your cleavage on full show and and it was everything he’d imagined. He inhales sharply, resisting the urge to just grab you, but Jungkook was a man of class (sometimes).

He gestured for you to remove the bralette and you did, hands reaching for your back to unclasp everything and let the material fall to your lap, freeing your tits right in front of his face and he was impulsively leaning in, briefly flicking his tongue over your hardened nipples before pulling away just to leave a ruthless smack over the expanse of your tits, revelling in the way your skin would redden and how your body would jump on top of him.

If he was feeling nice, he’d give in to you, give you exactly what you wanted, but to be frank, he wasn’t in a nice mood. He didn’t know if he hated you the way he did before all of this but God, was he gonna give you a piece of his mind..

Jungkook briefly slips his hand under your skirt and reaching between your legs, eager to feel just how soaked you were through your panties and boy, he was not disappointed.

Just mere talking and subtle teasing got you this riled up?

Clearly yes, your thighs were shuddering between his hand and you were almost embarrassed to be sitting where you were right now, “What are you waiting for?” you huff, frustration evident in your tone as you pulled yourself up to slip off your panties.

“I’m waiting for you to beg.”

“I’m not begging you—”

As soon as your panties were off, Jungkook was immediately pulling you back down onto his lap, now getting a real feel of your slick dampening his dress pants, “You’ll beg me, otherwise we can just wrap this up and call it a day…” he trails off, firmly gripping your hips as he pressed you down harder on his hardening cock, forcing a quiet moan to slip past your lips.

“Come on, Y/N… you know what you want, just tell me,” he whispers, eyes meeting yours and drinking in the irritation in them.

God, he loved irritating you.

Giving in just this once wouldn't hurt you, but you weren’t exactly the begging type of person, “I need your hands…” you manage to muster, your poor cunt practically leaking over his slacks.

“That’s not how you ask nicely,” Jungkook taunts you, throwing in a disappointed sigh, “Enlighten me, will you? How bad do you want them?” He leans back against the sofa, his hands rolling the hem of your skirt up over your thighs so he could have a clear cut view of your pussy, swallowing sharply once his eyes catch a glint of your flesh shining under the dim lights.

"Fuck you.." you grit. Jungkook stating the obvious was embarrassing for you; who would've thought Jeon Jungkook would be the reason for your desperation.

You could tell from the tone of his voice that he was enjoying tormenting you, and today was not gonna be the day you beg for him; you had far too much pride for that.

Instead of using your words, you grab ahold of his hand, guiding it down your body and between your legs. Once the pad of his fingers were against your clit, you wasted no time in rocking your hips against them. "I— I want your fingers inside me," you whisper against his ear, hoping he’d cut you some slack.

"Oh Y/N..." Jungkook shook his head disapprovingly. He quickly pulls his hands away to fetch his tie laying next to him on the couch.

You knew exactly where he was going with this and you were right; he’d grabbed your wrists and forced them behind your lower back, using his black tie to restrain your hands, and all you could do was shuffle on top of him, “I’d be careful when moving, wouldn’t want you to fall back,” he taunts you, a grin plastering his face as he pulled on the restraints one last time.

Jungkook doesn’t even spare you a minute to get used to the tie, his hand making home between your legs once again as he moved the pad of his fingers up and down against your swollen clit agonisingly slow, “Don’t you know your manners, Y/N? What happened to saying ‘please’ when you want something?”

You were falling apart on top of him, your hands clawing at nothing as you tried to remain composed. You felt absolutely hopeless, and giving in didn’t seem so bad right about now.

“I fucking hate you,” you seethe through gritted teeth, grinding yourself against his fingers seeing as his lace was too slow for your own liking, “Please, Jungkook…” it physically hurt you to say those words, feeling your cheeks swell up in embarrassment, “I wanna fuck myself on your fingers…”

Most certainly pleased by your answer, he doesn't waste any time, thrusting his index and middle finger into you so fast, a gasp was ripped from your throat. “See, that wasn’t so hard, was it? Only a real slut would beg to get fucked by a guy she hates.”

His hands began to push in and out carefully, admiring your eventual fucked out state, "Fuck yourself on them, pretty," Jungkook instructs, gradually speeding up the rhythm of his fingers. "Or do you want me to curl them?"

It was a rhetorical question, already feeling him curl his fingers between your soft walls as you helplessly clenched around him.

It felt so good.

It was unfortunate your body was close to giving in, struggling to stay up on top of him but you tried to muster as much strength as you could to keep going, drowning Jungkook's digits in your slick as your hips moved up and down on his fingers at a similar pace to his wrist, “Jeon, I can’t..

"Oh? But you can argue with me, call me names, and make a fool of me in front of my colleagues?" Jungkook taunts, speeding up his fingers to a torturous fast pace that was sure to bring you closer to your high. "You can do all of that, but you can't fuck yourself on my fingers? What a pathetic bitch.”

He reaches behind you to untie the restraints binding your wrists together, letting the material drop to the floor behind you before he was picking you up and carrying you over to your desk, setting you down on the surface and pushing you to lie back ever so slightly as he dropped to his knees between your legs.

He split your legs apart, audibly groaning at the sight of your swollen pussy; clit peeking out and your tight hole desperately clenching around nothing. “Fuck… Look at that desperate pussy..” he mumbles to himself, fixing your legs over his shoulders as he leaned in, pressing the flat of his tongue against your cunt.

A content sigh left fell from your lips as he used the tip of his tongue to toy with your sensitive bud, causing your thighs to shake around his head. The repetitive movement had your body tensing and the moans you’d been keeping to a minimum now at the max.

“So— so good..” you whimper, gazing down at him. With your hands free, they moved to grab at his dark locks, shoving his head further between your legs till you could feel his nose repeatedly nudging against your clit and good god, Jungkook would go to hell and back to drown in your pussy for eternity.

He let out a muffled groan, sliding his tongue between your folds and sucking on your clit like his life depended on it, but he needed to pull away if he wanted to live to experience that.

When Jungkook pulled away, you whined, but he wasn’t gone for long, suddenly delivering a harsh slap to your cunt that made your body jump and left your eyes rolling to the back of your head.

It stung, but it felt so fucking good.

Pleased by your reaction, he did it again, this time only harder, “Oh, so Miss Lawyer likes getting her slutty pussy slapped?”

Before you could even respond, Jungkook was biting on his bottom lip, not wasting another second before he’d spat right over your aching cunt, forcing you to arch your back off the desk as he watched the bead of spit trail between your folds in awe.

He leaned in again, shoving his tongue into your aching cunt and feeling your walls clench around the wet muscle almost as if you didn’t wanna let go and he found it beyond amusing, pulling away almost immediately just to spite you as he stood up to tower over your body; mouth glistening from all the slick and you couldn’t deny he looked like a hot mess.

What you didn’t see coming, was Jungkook grabbing your face, slapping you one as he squished your cheeks within his hold, forcing your lips to pucker as he spat into your mouth, the mixture of his saliva and your slick seeping down your throat as you swallowed with no hesitation.

He chuckled deeply, “Should’ve known an A class whore like yourself was into this shit. What do you think the jury would think about that, huh?” He continues to tug on your face, forcing you to keep your eyes on him so he could watch you break down before him.

Jungkook pulls you up and off the desk, standing tall and confident in front of you as you tried to regain a steady composure, almost stumbling.

“I don’t know how they’d feel knowing the slutty prosecutor got on her knees for the heir of this firm,” he starts, reaching out to wrap his hand around your neck firmly and pulling you towards him, “We should risk it and find out, huh?” he breathes out against your lips, low and hoarse and you had to squeeze your thighs shut from the flutters you were feeling between your legs.

“I’d rather throw dirt in my eyes than suck your dick,” you spit, shamelessly lying through your teeth and Jungkook immediately knew you were playing games.

“You think you’re funny, huh?” His hands shift from your neck to the back of your head, gripping a hand full of your hair and urging you to get on your knees and you did exactly that, making it easy for him to get you down as you tried your best to conceal the knowing smile growing on your lips but all you did was lick your lips up at him, anticipation clouding your eyes as you gulped.

The subtle action alone had his dick jumping in his slacks and he refused to wait any longer before unbuckling his belt and pulling pants halfway down his thighs, leaving a thick and oblivious imprint of his cock straining against his boxers right in front of your face.

You didn’t realise it, but your body was inching towards him and Jungkook took notice straight away, doing you the favour of pulling his cock out from its confines to stand tall and hard before you.

You were meaning to reach out for him, but he beat you to it, wrapping a strong hand around the base of his cock as he pumped himself between his fist a couple times, squinting at the little bead of precum eventually dripping down the base of his cock and you could only stare on in awe.

“You want my cock down your throat, huh?” he taunts deeply, moving forwards so he could guide the tip of his leaking cock across your face, nudging your cheek and avoiding all contact with your mouth.

Right where you wanted him most.

“Say it,” he lightly slaps the tip of his dick against your cheek, dragging it down to your lips but not yet pushing in, “Say you’re a cock-hungry bitch who wants her face fucked by the man she hates so much…”

Submission was never your thing. You always showed yourself out to be a woman who always stood her ground, never taking shit from anyone. But now it was your worst enemy, proving you wrong on all of the above.

“I’m a cock-hungry bitch..” your words are there, but no confidence within them, “Who wants her face fucked by the man she hates so much,” you mumble against the tip of his dick, hoping he’d give in to you.

Jungkook shrugs, “Could be better, but what more do I expect from a whore?” He suddenly pushes the tip of his cock past your lips, taking you by surprise as he groaned deeply, basking in the warmth of your mouth as he slowly eased himself into you inch by inch until he completely bottomed out.

You couldn’t handle his immense size, already struggling to breathe and he hadn’t even moved yet and tears were brimming your eyes.

“Tight fucking fit…” he seethes, slowly pulling out only to slam back into your mouth with brute force, each thrust pushing against the back of your throat and though you started choking, you couldn’t bring yourself to stop him. You didn’t want him to stop; allowing him to use your head as assistance.

“Fucking made for my cock, aren’t you? A perfect fit..”

The only sounds that could be heard were Jungkook’s groans and the illicit sounds of your gagging and spluttering, a mixture of spit and precum leaking out the sides of your mouth.

"Gonna make better use of your pretty mouth.. and dumb you up so you'll never be able to throw all that fucking attitude at me again.." With no prep whatsoever, he impales your throat again, this time keeping your head at the very base of his cock, your nose brushing against his abdomen as your throat clenched around him, squeezing tightly to the point you could feel him throb.

“If this is the only way to shut you up, I’ll have you on your knees more often,” he looks down at you, watching the woman who stood so high on her fucking imaginary pedestal, now kneeling between his legs with her mouth stuffed full of his cock like a needy bitch.

Jungkook was damn near certain he almost came from the sight of you alone so he suddenly pulled you away from him, a thick and heavy string of precum connecting your lips to him leaving you a gasping, teary eyed, heaving mess.

“You’re so fucking annoying,” you grumble, slightly annoyed by the sudden withdrawal as you hastily stood onto your feet.

“Oh, Y/N.. What am I gonna do with you?” he questions, sarcasm lacing his voice as he took a couple steps towards you just to grab your arm and turn you around; pushing you down front first against the glass surface of his desk.

You could barely make out what he was about to do, the side of your face pressed up against the glass but God, he was so close behind you, you couldn’t help but push back against him a little, whimpering at the sliver of skin-on-skin contact with him and Jungkook was all for your eagerness.

He spits against the palm of his hand, using the heel of his palm to reach down between your legs and massage your weeping cunt, briefly letting his digits dip into you before replacing them with his cock.

At last.

“Oh— fuck.. Jeon—!” You’re more vocal now than you were ever before, his size deeming you absolutely vulnerable as he pushed into you slowly. The stretch was beyond humane, he was practically splitting you open and your tears were suddenly making another appearance.

Jungkook felt like he was going through the seven stages of grief; not expecting you to be so tight around him and already so addicting, it was like a revelation for him.

“Pussy made just for me..” he groans, a palm aiming to land a harsh smack against your ass cheek, making you jump and the ongoing stinging sensation turning the affected area a light shade of pink which was bound to darken overtime. “All fucking mine—” he grits harshly squeezing the flesh of your ass as he continued to thrust in and out of your sopping cunt, “Fuck, look at your tight pussy just sucking me in… bet you like me shoving into your cunt, huh?”

“Uhghhh yes, yes! I love it so much!”

You loved the pain.

Each powerful thrust caused your body to repeatedly shift against your desk, again and again his dick slamming so deep into your guts you wondered if it were even possible to experience such a thing.

You could tell he was giving you his all; his muscles were tense, every vein in his body was popping out just so he could take out his frustrations on you. He dealt with your ass for three years; constant bickering, competitions, insults, but fuck him, if he knew you what got you going, he’d have fucked you way sooner.

“Bet you wished I’d come in and fuck you at some point, huh?” A smirk was lingering over his features, knowing well what your answer was.

“God— yes!” Your back forcibly arches against your will as you nod desperately.

Truth be told, you did look forward to his visits in your office just to argue with you. Arguing with an attractive man who looked even hotter when he was mad?

Of course.

“And everytime I’d leave your office, you’d sit in your chair with a wet fucking pussy all day, hoping I’d come back in just to fuck you, right? But God, why didn’t I do that?” he mentally curses himself, digging his fingers into your hips as his pace faltered, indicating he was losing traction.

“Fuck you for not making a move,” you hiss through tears, gripping at the edge of your desk for stability as his thrusts became sloppy and messy.

He lands another harsh smack against your ass, making you help in surprise, “Shut the fuck up, I’m not done,” he seethes, picking up the pace and knocking all other backtalk out of your lungs, "Every damn day, I've had to deal with your shit; talking down on me—" his words laced with anger as he slams in to you, "—flaunting your stupid awards in my face and walking around like you own the fucking place."

He abruptly pulls out, turning you over to lay back on the desk whilst he spread your legs apart, his cock slipping into you once more as his free hand settled a harsh slap against your tits, “Now I have you under me, crying on my cock like a little bitch. Where'd that confidence go, huh?"

You couldn’t bring yourself to respond, to busy doing exactly as he’d stated. Your mind was hazy and your body was going numb, all you were capable of was squeezing your walls tightly around his cock as a sign to say you were close.

“Oh you’re close, huh?” Jungkook brings his hand down to scoop up the stringy mess connecting both your bodies, “We can’t have security walk in, can we?” lifting his hand again to shove three slick coated digits into your mouth in a bid to silence your moans as you came. “Come all over my cock like you were born for it.”

And thank god he did what he did because your pleasure filled cries would have woken up the entire city.

Your tongue lapped at his fingers, sucking off whatever was there before he pulled them out of your mouth, admiring the way they glistened under the dim lights.

You stared up at him in a daze, chest heaving and tits bruised red as he thrusted back and forth a couple more times before finally reaching his orgasm with a low bellow.

“Fuck…” he groans to himself and you could feel his warmth completely fill you up, some of it too much to the point white was leaking out of your sensitive cunt as he drained himself empty into you.

Once Jungkook was certain he was done, he slowly pulled out, his cock falling limp and his mess now prominent between your legs, noticing it was all slipping out so he did you the duty of using his fingers to push as much as he could back into you, the sensitivity making you shudder, “Can’t let it go to waste,” he chuckles, bringing his fingers up to his lips to sneak a taste.

It was the hottest thing you’d ever seen and he was pulling you to sit up on the desk before grabbing your case with both hands and kissing you with all his might.

It was unexpected but you were too in the moment to stop him. You could just about make out the distinctive taste of yourself and him on your lips and all you were wondering was how the hell you’d both come back from this.

Jungkook bit down on your bottom lip, dragging it out towards him before letting go and watching the plumpness bounce back, red and swollen like he’d left his mark on you.

“What did we just do..?” you whisper, finally drinking in the state of yourself and the absolute state of your office, papers everywhere and the smell of sex surrounding you.

Jungkook didn’t know what came over him, but he needed to reassure you one thing; “This probably wasn’t ideal but I don’t regret it,” he says, eyes glued to yours and curious to know if you felt the same way.

You didn’t know if you felt the same way, but you certainly weren’t feeling bad about it.

“You don’t have to say anything now, or put a label on it or anything, you can take your time,” he tells you softly, pulling away from you to pull his pants back up and tuck himself away. He was unsure whether you wanted to be alone or wanted to stay in his presence, but he figured he’d do what was safest, “Want me to clean you up and walk you to your car?”

Your hands adjusted the skirt that had been rolled up your hips, pulling it down to shield your thighs and the mess as you shook your head, “Oh no, that’s okay, I can take it from here,” you reply, this time giving him a genuine smile for his chivalry, one he’d never actually seen on you before and he wished he could see it more often.

Jungkook nodded and went to collect his shirt by the sofa, throwing it over his shoulder and heading for the door, “I’ll see you tomorrow morning then for some case work.”

“Yeah, you too…”

He curtly nodded and headed out of your office with a sigh. He didn’t wanna leave you alone after that, but he wanted to avoid any intrusive/pushy questioning and awkwardness.

How the hell would you both ever come back from this?

perm taglist: @aliceaflor5-blog @kookiecrumb @jjkeverlast @prettyghost @kooliv @koobsessed @gimmethatagustd @pb-n-juju @aslias17 @ririlovesangst @kootonins @taehyungseggs @dewamused @jungshook7 @jiminsneckkisses @moonfaery @fragmentof-indifference @hoseokteardrop

Please do not repost my works onto any platforms.

— film me | jjk drabble

pairing: jungkook x reader

rating: 18+ explicit

genre + warnings: established relationship, smut, sex toy, filming

“Faster,” Jungkook ordered calmly. The vibrations from your dildo were driving you crazy, and so was the large erection tenting his pants.

You wanted him.

Seguir leyendo

— trust issues | jjk

⊳ pairing: drummer!jungkook x model!reader

⊳ rating: 18+

⊳ word count: 2.2k

⊳ genre: bar au, non-idol au, strangers to lovers, smut & fluff

⊳ warnings: explicit sexual content, language, oral sex (f. receiving), fingering

⊳ summary: he was trouble. everyone knew it. you knew it too but you didn’t care. You were a player as well and maybe, even worse than him.

Sex to you was like an escape. You’d fuck men and kick them out after you were done. All of them, except him last night.

Every Friday night, he played the drums at the bar you worked at, and every time, he and his boys left with different girls.

He was trouble. Everyone knew it. You knew it too, but you didn’t care. You were a player, too, and maybe even worse than him. All of your exes and one-night stands were the opposite of him. Jungkook was exactly your type. Long dark hair, dark eyes, and an incredible body. You often imagined how that body would feel on top of yours.

“You know,” your friend said, taking a sip from the drink you just made her at the bar, “you’re like the girl version of him. I bet sex would be so bomb with him.”

Seguir leyendo

STAY | 15

Back at the dorms, Jungkook misses you madly. Hate, heartbreak, and longing mix in his heart. In public, though, he’s still cold and hurtful towards you – until he discovers who’s his new roommate.

index • previous • next

Word count: 9k

Warnings: smut, dub-con fantasy, attempted infidelity.

# angst, delirious masturbation (?), clumsy anal fingering, noona + mommy kink, Jungkook is kind of messed up in this one (but who’s to blame for that except me lol), scent kink, cum play, crying, awkward hyung-junior bonding!!

A/N: thanks to Generic Club Girl 1 for starring in this chapter.

Seguir leyendo

ruin you [masterlist]

pairing: jeon jungkook x fem. reader

summary: best friend!jk teaches you the basics of sex, and essentially ruins you for anyone else

genre: smut (pwp, until further notice)

warnings: virgin!reader, the classic “I’ll teach you to fuck” trope, more listed per each chapter

status: complete

part 1: oral sex (m. receiving); crying kink; finger sucking; cum swallowing [1.6k words]

part 2:  hickeys; making out; fingering; mirror use; finger sucking; spit as lube; sex toy (mentioned); crying kink; jungkook cums in his pants [2.2k words]

part 3:  pillow humping; male masturbation; facetime sex; mentions of breeding + public sex; tiny bit of praise kink [2.6k words]

part 4: loss of virginity, protected sex, oral (fem. receiving), fingering, making out, crying kink, light spit play, the “you want me? go ahead and have me” thing from his live [3.3k words]

jungkook spanks you n fucks ur throat in his recording studio over those ripped jeans of his....... Please n Thank you!

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x gn!reader

Genre: smut

Word count: 1098

Warnings: making out, teasing, oral sex (male receiving), hair pulling, cursing, cum swallowing, jungkook in ripped jeans, this isn’t proof read, at all.

a/n: my lovely anon, I know you sent this in February. I know it’s May. I’m sorry. I’ll be more active soon, but until then, enjoy the image of jungkook in those ripped jeans (which i cant find a picture or gif of - please send me one if you have it ☹)

“I need to go, Kook.” You laughed softly, trying to peel his muscular arms away from your frame. “I’m not getting yelled at by Yoongi because of you, again.”

“Yoongi isn’t here,” He mumbled, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck. His relaxed, soothing voice gave way to something you cannot help but describe as slightly whiney. Slightly. “You can’t leave me like this!”

A half hour prior, you had come to see your long-term boyfriend in his studio, after a few hours of him bugging you and continuously blowing up your phone. He usually became this clingy after a long week, something that had been happening way too often. So, to ease his conscience (and to give your phone a break from constantly being lit up with his messages), you snuck into the BigHit building, steering clear from any of the other members’ private spaces, knowing they would most probably snap at either you or Jungkook for ‘fraternising during working hours’ or something equally as boring.

Some way, somehow, an innocent farewell peck had turned into a full-blown make-out session, complete with a lusty-eyed Jungkook, not to mention his hardness pressing against your thigh as you straddled him.

“Quickie?” He suggested, his pout accentuated by his slightly puffy, pink lips. “I can get us both off and then you can leave.”

“Who said I was horny?” You teased, a giggle threatening to fall from your lips when you saw his exasperated features. “Maybe I’m just not in the mood, today.”

Even as you said it, you knew it was a lie – you were always in the mood when it comes to Jungkook – but if you agree to a ‘quickie’ you know you would probably spend the night in the studio, which sounds fun, but that couch definitely wouldn’t do great things for your back.

“Do you really not want to?” He inquired, trying to hide his fallen expression. “If you really need to leave, I can walk you to your car –”

“You’re going to walk out with this?” You murmured as a soft groan fell from his parted lips as you ever-so-slightly moved against his clothed erection. His hands came up to your hips, stilling your movements with a firm touch and clenched jaw.

“Don’t. Tease.” He ordered, trying to calm his heartrate, concentrating with closed eyes. “Let me walk you to your car –”

“Just let me get you off, then I’ll leave. I can’t let Jimin tease you again about being left with blue balls.” You mumbled, going from straddling his ripped-jean-clad, muscular thighs to kneeling on the floor. Before Jungkook could protest, you popped open the button on his jeans, mouth watering as you came face-to-face with his still clothed, throbbing erection.

“Baby, hold on…” He trailed off, trying not to squirm in his seat as you peeled off his jeans, his pale thighs coming into vision. Humming to get him to continue his train of thought, you pulled his underwear away just enough to free his length, then – without much thought –kitten licked the drooling precum that had beaded on the tip. A hiss left his parted lips, his hand automatically getting tangled in your hair.

“Hold on for?” You asked, using the continuously drooling precum to slowly pump his length.

“Not going to last long,” He muttered, doe eyes threatening to close from the pleasure being brought by the swift strokes of your hand. “It feels like I’ve been hard for hours.”

“Aww, poor horny little baby,” The teasing words fell out your mouth before you really had time to think about it. “Feel like you’re going to cum already?”

“Did I fucking say that?” He snapped, pulling on your hair slightly, making you slightly wince but mostly contributing to your suddenly painfully obvious arousal. Your hand faltered slightly; maybe you should have just had a quickie, allowing Jungkook to fuck you hard and fast bringing you both to your climaxes… He seems high strung enough to have you reeling from the snap of his hips.

Before you could say anything, the clock in his studio shone bright, reminding you that you really should have been home a long time ago.

“Fuck my mouth,” You begged, voice hoarse from your own arousal. “Please?”

Curses filled the air as he took in your request, pulling your warm, awaiting mouth over his cock. Jungkook cradled the back of your head firmly, but with a gentleness that reminded you that this was still your Jungkook.

Your tongue fell flat against the underside of his length, running up and down the sensitive flesh as he held you in place for a few seconds, just enjoying being sheathed in your mouth. His chest rapidly rose and fell, yet another tell-tale sign that he was indeed high-strung from being hard for way too long.

Using his free hand, he placed both of your much smaller hands over his thighs, tangling both his hands in your hair afterwards.

“Tap me if you need me to stop, okay?” He instructed, a slight crack in his voice as he struggled to maintain his façade. Humming in response to his request, you accidentally sent vibrations down his cock, jumpstarting his ascent to euphoria.

Holding your hot, wet mouth slightly above his length, he shallowly thrusted into your mouth before really sheathing himself into your throat. Groans and pants filled the air, surely notifying anyone withing the area that they probably should not come into this room.

“Fuck, Y/N, I’m so close.” He moaned, gripping your hair tighter as his climax approached. More curses and moans left his slightly swollen parted lips, giving you motivation to ignore the burning sensation in your lungs from lack of oxygen.

Small sounds of pleasure left him as he thrusted quicker into your mouth, soft mewls encouraging you to keep going despite the tears running down your cheeks, before he held you down onto his length as he spilled himself on your tongue.

Swallowing his load, you gave his softening length slow, timid licks and lingering kisses, making sure you swallowed every drop of his cum. Wincing slightly at the overstimulation, he leaned forward and kissed you, tasting his essence on your tongue.

jungkook spanks you n fucks ur throat in his recording studio over those ripped jeans of his....... Please n Thank you!

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x gn!reader

Genre: smut

Word count: 1098

Warnings: making out, teasing, oral sex (male receiving), hair pulling, cursing, cum swallowing, jungkook in ripped jeans, this isn’t proof read, at all.

a/n: my lovely anon, I know you sent this in February. I know it’s May. I’m sorry. I’ll be more active soon, but until then, enjoy the image of jungkook in those ripped jeans (which i cant find a picture or gif of - please send me one if you have it ☹)

“I need to go, Kook.” You laughed softly, trying to peel his muscular arms away from your frame. “I’m not getting yelled at by Yoongi because of you, again.”

“Yoongi isn’t here,” He mumbled, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck. His relaxed, soothing voice gave way to something you cannot help but describe as slightly whiney. Slightly. “You can’t leave me like this!”

A half hour prior, you had come to see your long-term boyfriend in his studio, after a few hours of him bugging you and continuously blowing up your phone. He usually became this clingy after a long week, something that had been happening way too often. So, to ease his conscience (and to give your phone a break from constantly being lit up with his messages), you snuck into the BigHit building, steering clear from any of the other members’ private spaces, knowing they would most probably snap at either you or Jungkook for ‘fraternising during working hours’ or something equally as boring.

Some way, somehow, an innocent farewell peck had turned into a full-blown make-out session, complete with a lusty-eyed Jungkook, not to mention his hardness pressing against your thigh as you straddled him.

“Quickie?” He suggested, his pout accentuated by his slightly puffy, pink lips. “I can get us both off and then you can leave.”

“Who said I was horny?” You teased, a giggle threatening to fall from your lips when you saw his exasperated features. “Maybe I’m just not in the mood, today.”

Even as you said it, you knew it was a lie – you were always in the mood when it comes to Jungkook – but if you agree to a ‘quickie’ you know you would probably spend the night in the studio, which sounds fun, but that couch definitely wouldn’t do great things for your back.

“Do you really not want to?” He inquired, trying to hide his fallen expression. “If you really need to leave, I can walk you to your car –”

“You’re going to walk out with this?” You murmured as a soft groan fell from his parted lips as you ever-so-slightly moved against his clothed erection. His hands came up to your hips, stilling your movements with a firm touch and clenched jaw.

“Don’t. Tease.” He ordered, trying to calm his heartrate, concentrating with closed eyes. “Let me walk you to your car –”

“Just let me get you off, then I’ll leave. I can’t let Jimin tease you again about being left with blue balls.” You mumbled, going from straddling his ripped-jean-clad, muscular thighs to kneeling on the floor. Before Jungkook could protest, you popped open the button on his jeans, mouth watering as you came face-to-face with his still clothed, throbbing erection.

“Baby, hold on…” He trailed off, trying not to squirm in his seat as you peeled off his jeans, his pale thighs coming into vision. Humming to get him to continue his train of thought, you pulled his underwear away just enough to free his length, then – without much thought –kitten licked the drooling precum that had beaded on the tip. A hiss left his parted lips, his hand automatically getting tangled in your hair.

“Hold on for?” You asked, using the continuously drooling precum to slowly pump his length.

“Not going to last long,” He muttered, doe eyes threatening to close from the pleasure being brought by the swift strokes of your hand. “It feels like I’ve been hard for hours.”

“Aww, poor horny little baby,” The teasing words fell out your mouth before you really had time to think about it. “Feel like you’re going to cum already?”

“Did I fucking say that?” He snapped, pulling on your hair slightly, making you slightly wince but mostly contributing to your suddenly painfully obvious arousal. Your hand faltered slightly; maybe you should have just had a quickie, allowing Jungkook to fuck you hard and fast bringing you both to your climaxes… He seems high strung enough to have you reeling from the snap of his hips.

Before you could say anything, the clock in his studio shone bright, reminding you that you really should have been home a long time ago.

“Fuck my mouth,” You begged, voice hoarse from your own arousal. “Please?”

Curses filled the air as he took in your request, pulling your warm, awaiting mouth over his cock. Jungkook cradled the back of your head firmly, but with a gentleness that reminded you that this was still your Jungkook.

Your tongue fell flat against the underside of his length, running up and down the sensitive flesh as he held you in place for a few seconds, just enjoying being sheathed in your mouth. His chest rapidly rose and fell, yet another tell-tale sign that he was indeed high-strung from being hard for way too long.

Using his free hand, he placed both of your much smaller hands over his thighs, tangling both his hands in your hair afterwards.

“Tap me if you need me to stop, okay?” He instructed, a slight crack in his voice as he struggled to maintain his façade. Humming in response to his request, you accidentally sent vibrations down his cock, jumpstarting his ascent to euphoria.

Holding your hot, wet mouth slightly above his length, he shallowly thrusted into your mouth before really sheathing himself into your throat. Groans and pants filled the air, surely notifying anyone withing the area that they probably should not come into this room.

“Fuck, Y/N, I’m so close.” He moaned, gripping your hair tighter as his climax approached. More curses and moans left his slightly swollen parted lips, giving you motivation to ignore the burning sensation in your lungs from lack of oxygen.

Small sounds of pleasure left him as he thrusted quicker into your mouth, soft mewls encouraging you to keep going despite the tears running down your cheeks, before he held you down onto his length as he spilled himself on your tongue.

Swallowing his load, you gave his softening length slow, timid licks and lingering kisses, making sure you swallowed every drop of his cum. Wincing slightly at the overstimulation, he leaned forward and kissed you, tasting his essence on your tongue.

Redamancy | JJK

Pairing: Athlete!fuckboy!Jungkook x smart-ass!female!Reader

Genre: College AU, E2L, Athlete AU, smut, fluff

Synopsis:

When someone learns that Jungkook has been secretly keeping a puppy in his room despite not being allowed to, he turns to ask the only other person who knows about his secret for help. And suddenly you two—who had long been bitter enemies—become closer than ever.

A/n: I had intended to make this a series when I first started writing it and posted Chapter One. But once Tumblr gave me a lengthy shadowban, my enthusiasm for the fic vanished. Now, nearly six months later, I'll post the complete version, including chapter 1, this week. It might happen tomorrow or in a few days.

Please repost this if you want to be included in the taglist; I hope you haven't forgotten about me or the fic. Thank you a lot. You guys are amazing.

@kooliv @sexymenandcuteanimals101 @tatyhend @idontevenknow75 @dunixxd @saweetspoiled @codeinebelle @telepathytae @faepurity @koobsessed @mermaidxhes @bebejungkook @sxtaep @janedukiesworld @outro-kook @grasstrainerjoonie @ziko @jungshook7 @zerocge @dodoneck @beahonomo @jiimtaee @nervoustyphoonpersona @fan-ati--c @koobsessed @nucleo-bang-tan @sincerelyflora @lil-sracha @sweetonkookieandtae @exactlygreatcoffee @bbtsficrecs @ellesalazar @btstoreadd @here4btsfics @02sunghoonie @sugaminh @kkjagi @femmesstuff @ricekrispyyyyy @runariya @loolylily @bbangtanlove95 @jkkkkkay

Before Dawn | kth.

banner by my love @kookiestarlight 🤎

↠ pairing : Kim Taehyung x Female Reader

↠ summary : Your love for Taehyung was something you often described as as a quiet emotion. He had very quickly become a part of the oxygen you needed to breathe. In his kisses, you found the promises of realness. In his embrace, you discovered your heartbeat, for the echoes of its steady sounds always mended your broken wings. The split second before his touch, every nerve in both your body and brain was electrified. It was the anticipation of being together in a way that was more than words, in a way that was so completely tangible.

OR when Taehyung shows his appreciation for you in the early hours of Sunday and you fall in love with him all over again.

↠ genre : established relationship au, idol au, boyfriend!tae, comfort au, pwp

↠ rating : 18+

↠ warnings : small allusions to sad feelings & anxiety, unprotected sex, female oral, fingering, breast play, making out, reader squirts, pet names, softdom!tae, praise kink, they’re both just hopelessly in love with e/o 🥺

↠ word count : 5K

↠ a/n : hello loves! i’m back :) here is a little something that was written for the “slow motion” couple, although it can be read as a standalone! this was my first smut that i wrote & so please excuse how bad it is (i did edit it, but it’s still quite rubbish 💀) thank you to @chateautae​ & @taegularities​ who beta-read this for me at the time. thank you to @jjksblackgf​ for having a glance over it too 🤎 feedback is always appreciated & happy reading, loves! 🤎

↠ song : i wanna be yours - artic monkeys

4am.

It had to have been 4am.

Less than an hour ago, a comforting quietness fell upon you and Taehyung. The two of you spent all day together in bed, skin-to-skin having a heart-to-heart. You held him tight whilst comforting him and listening to everything he poured out of himself. Whether Taehyung made sense or not, you listened to all he had to say. After being strong for so long, he finally gave permission to his vulnerable and fragile self to come out of hiding. To seek shelter in the sanctuary of your hold. You gave him advice, helped him write down his thoughts, but most importantly you graced him with soft kisses to let him know that he’s okay and that his feelings are valid. That he’s still here and that he’s not alone.

Seguir leyendo

—sweeter than sugar. (m)

⟶ pairing: jungkook x reader 

⟶ genre: ceo!jungkook / sugar daddy au + fluff / smut 

⟶ words: 22,258 oops

⟶ rating: 18+ 

⟶ summary: when infamous playboy jeon jungkook comes to you with a proposition that you know you should say no to, you can’t. because all you really know is that being spoiled has never felt so sweet before

⟶ warnings: lot’s of brand name dropping bc jungkook stays spoiling you!!, sprinkle of angst, unprotected sex, dry humping, grinding, oral sex (f receiving), fingering, face riding, handjob, standing sex, window sex?, riding, creampie

⟶ note: this is a repost of a fic from my old blog, just in case it looks familiar to anyone!

Seguir leyendo

—stay. (m)

⟶ pairing: jungkook x reader

⟶ genre: popstar!jungkook x groupie!reader + smut / sprinkle of angst and fluff

⟶ words: 8,083

⟶ rating: 18+

⟶ summary: jungkook wasn’t always so madly in love with you but the fact that you’re sleeping with two of his band mates too makes things a tad bit complicated.

⟶ warnings: multiple smut scenes, slight dom themes, oral sex, finger sucking oops, boob fondling, hair pulling ft. jungkook’s undercut, doggy style, missionary, thigh riding, spitting, jealous kook!!, unprotected sex, kind of slight possessive themes? but also just general sweetness tbh 

⟶ disclaimer: my time jungkook still has me in my feels! also, this is a repost of an old fic on an old blog.

“Stay with me?”

Jungkook asks this hopefully, of course, but he already knows the answer. It’s just that, lying there with you on the hotel room bed, there’s no other place he’d rather be ━ and there’s no one else he’d rather experience the moment with than you. Legs tangled together on top of the duvet with your fingers tracing circles onto his bare chest, Jungkook swears he’s in love with you ━ only, you’re not his to have. 

“I have to go,” You pout, though your fingers continue drawing constellations on his skin, treading down his arm and over the tattoos that adorn him. You’re focusing now on the lily on his forearm, around and around, sending his head spiralling. “Promised my friends we could hang out today. Besides, don’t you have Mina or Nina━” You wave your hand in the air to dismiss the thought━ “coming over soon?”

Seguir leyendo

candles & flames | jjk (m)

Summary: He wasn’t supposed to be yours. His foolery wasn’t supposed to target you. This wasn’t supposed to happen.

➳ pairing:Jungkook x reader ➳ rating: 18+ ➳ genre: enemies to lovers, royal!au; angst, fluff, smut ➳ warnings: so! they’re both royalty/high in society (gd should’ve called this ‘royals’), fuckboy jk, banter, past side character death mentioned, hints of fake dating but not really, angst!, the ending.., douchebag jk at times, crying, guilt, jk is sus too, bits of jealousy, society sucks, explicit sexual content: carriage shenanigans, sexual tension, fingering, oral (m. & f. receiving), mouth fucking, spit stuff?, manhandling, spanking, dry humping, dirty talk, angry foreplay but things get softer, he comes in her mouth <3, they’re hiding during all that <3 ➳ wc: 24.6k 😐 ➳ a/n: sooo. i love e2l and regency aus, but i haven’t written much/any of those, so they’re not my strongest suit. but hopefully y’all will still enjoy reading it, bc i did enjoy writing it. it’s just the beginning hehe <3 this entirely new genre/trope took some brainpower lmao so i’d love if you dropped by and told me what you think !! 🤍 

TAGLIST | MASTERLIST | WIPs

Jeon Jungkook’s sincerity doesn’t run as deep as his undeniable beauty.

Seguir leyendo

p&p | jjk masterlist

⛓️paired & pierced⛓️reader's pov✨smut✨

⛓️pairing: hotnerd!jungkook x popular!reader(f)

⛓️genre: smut, fluff, college!au

⛓️summary: When your professor assigns a collaborative midterm project, you’re paired up with Jeon Jungkook, the quiet grumpy smartass who keeps to himself and doesn’t fuck with popular kids like you. If you can win him over, he might give you a taste of the tatted and pierced body he’s carefully tucked away beneath those oversized hoodies.

⛓️word count: 5.3k

⛓️warnings: dom!jungkook, sub!reader, unprotected rough sex, daddy kink, good girl kink, she’s tight, he’s big, fingering, mutual masturbation, begging, edging, orgasm denial, cumshot, dick tattoo, not the soft jjk i usually write

⛓️paired & puppy-eyed⛓️jjk's pov

⛓️summary: When Jeon Jungkook agrees to be your partner for a class project, he doesn’t realize what that might escalate to until you show up at his door in a teeny-tiny crop top and cling to his tattooed arm like his naughty little kitten.

⛓️word count: 4.6k

⛓️warnings: dom!jk, sub!reader, daddy/kitten undertones, dirty talk, reader calls herself a sl*t one time, dick tattoo, many rounds of sex off screen😔

⛓️pastries & promises⛓️reader's pov

⛓️summary: After hooking up with the hot nerdy boy in your coding class over the weekend, you’ll use any excuse to keep his hands on your body all week long.

⛓️word count: 3k

⛓️warnings: catdilf!jk, dom!jk, sub!reader, daddy/kitten undertones, praise kink, dirty talk, oc is a horny lil brat, mention of getting wasted at parties, one instance of slut-shaming, oc makes an ignorant comment about earl grey tea lol, no explicit smut in this drabble

⛓️playboys & pancakes⛓️jjk's pov

⛓️summary: When your fuckboy model friend Park Jimin returns from Paris, Jungkook can't help but feel a little jealous and protective over you even though the two of you aren't technically dating yet.

⛓️word count: 2.6k

⛓️warnings: catdilf!jk, dom!jk, sub!reader, daddy/kitten undertones, dirty talk, oc is a lil brat, boy gets jealous🤭, soft cuddling, jimin is a tattooed fuckboy, no explicit smut in this drabble

if you guys have any specific things you want to see from the p&p couple, feel free to lmk and i might write a drabble for it if i have time!✨ here's a list of ideas for future drabbles✏️ also adding the teaser link here bc the amount of notes is memeable✨

We Are All Dreamers [M]

➬ Title | We Are All Dreamers

➬ Summary | Jeon Jungkook is a cocky bastard. Not only does he have the pride and insolence twice the size of his head, but he also has an anger that could open up the door to hell on itself. As he continues to refuse to believe on the soulmate system, he keeps on unknowingly hurting you, punishing you for what the universe has thrown at him in the past. Would he change his ways as he finally meets you? Or would you run away, giving him the exit that he had seemed to desire so greatly?

↳ Pairings | Jeon Jungkook x reader

↳ Genre | Enemies to Lovers!au, Soulmate!au, Smut, Angst

↳ Ratings | +18 / M for Mature

↳ Warning | Heavy angst at the beginning, slow burn, lots of misunderstandings but lots of make-up sex happening, virgin sex/first time, penetration sex, dom!kook, possessive sex, dirty talk, minor degradation, slight breast play, body worship, pussy eating (some biting might be involved), fingering (f receiving; vaginal).

↳ Word count | 16,5k words (I went a little overboard, I’m so sorry but I can’t help myself *cries*)

↳ Music Companion | Lone Wolf - Our Love | Evrdo - Images |

➬ Author’s Note | Written as a commission for @mindays​. I’m sorry this took so long. I also made a little twist from your request to add some (more) drama, but I really hope you’ll enjoy this. Thank you so much for commissioning me :)  | Also tagging @ladyartemesia​ for chipping in some ideas through the comments left behind on my post to help me out with this lol

Had someone ever asked you how often times you had spent hours and long nights researching and reading everything there was to know about soulmates, perhaps you would have died of embarrassment.

It is not so much that you are completely obsessed about it—particularly about finding yours—it is just that you have had too many questions about it to not be able to just sit in idle and wait until the universe would finally give you some answers or tell you more than what it had been showing you.

Dreams, sometimes vivid, mostly vague. Each one had been coming to you in broken fragments as a sign that your soulmate truly exists. That the universe had set you up with another human being somewhere out there for you to find.

They don’t always come to you every time you sleep at night yet its arrival had always been unpredictable, coming at the most unexpected times.

You honestly cannot remember exactly when the dreams had first started coming to you. It must have been somewhere around your early teen years, or maybe longer. Perhaps you have had them way before then, yet you simply did not pay much attention to it since you obviously have had no clue of what they were all about.

You had only begun to understand more about it as you grew older, when you started hearing about what people had said about soulmates and the signs given to each person whenever they had been paired up with someone else.

The only problem was, people had always talked about soulmates and the journey of finding one another as a wonderful experience that had people yearning to encounter their own. They had talked about them as a wonderful mixture between excitements and thrills, as the search and anticipation give people more purpose.

For you, this soulmate searching business had been nothing but frustrating, infuriating, and yet, somewhere deep down, you still have hopes of finding yours.

Most of the times.

Seguir leyendo

runaway series masterlist — JJK [m]

⇢ summary ; When your best friend’s brother, your first-ever crush, offers to help you explore your sexual desires, you just can’t refuse. Especially when it’s someone as irresistible as Jeon Jungkook.

⇢ pairing ; tattoo artist / biker!jk x reader  [ ongoing ]

⇢ cross-posted ; wattpad ao3

⇢ status ; ongoing

⇢ genre ; best friend’s brother au, fwb (they’re not rlly friends tho), 4 years age gap, smut, angst, fluff, slow burn

⇢ warnings ; explicit sexual content, explicit language / swearing, alcohol consumption, each warning is stated in the beginning of each chapter !

⇢ word count ; 30k [ updating ]

⇢ for updates : schedule

MASTERLIST ₊˚✧ TAGLIST ₊˚✧ PLAYLIST

‧₊˚ CHAPTERS INDEX

⇝ one : the offer [ 9.5k ] 

When your best friend’s brother, your first-ever crush, offers to help with your sexual fantasies with a trade of nights of lust, you can’t say no—especially to someone as irresistible as Jeon Jungkook.

⇝ two : habits [ 20.7k ] 

The offer with Jungkook begins.

⇝ three : after hours [ coming soon ]

‧₊˚ EXTRA 

⇢ runaway moodboard ! | runaway theories 💡 | runaway jk

⇢ ask my characters ! [ open ]

⇢ drabbles [ requests are open ! ]

⇢ don’t hesitate to send me an ask if u wanna leave sweet messages or theories !! &lt;3

⇢ FAQ ;

when do you update?

i don’t have specific dates i update, i mostly follow my inspiration schedule, but i do have a post where i update my process of writing !! it’s linked on my bio & up the post on ‘schedule’ 🥰 i always try to update the post as often as i can <3

how many chapters will this series have in total?

well…..i honestly can’t tell right now, mostly because i’m still thinking if this series will be super duper long or not :’) i think 10+ chapters, but we’ll seeee ♡

can i be on your taglist?

of course !! please fill the form on top of the post & i will be adding u <3

⇢ runaway tag ! [ updates, tags, asks, etc… ]

© 𝐀𝐑𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐃𝐊𝐎𝐎𝐊𝐈𝐄 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟐. all rights reserved; do not copy, translate or post it in another platform at any circumstances.