Billy Batson Can Never Grow Up Because It's Just Not Funny. Like Oh, This Guy Says A Magic Word And Then

Billy Batson can never grow up because it's just not funny. Like oh, this guy says a magic word and then transforms into a slightly buffer guy? I am snoring. I am tossing the comic away in disgust. He's gotta be a little guy. He's gotta be a little shit. He's gotta be an angelic ten year old. He's been to juvie. He doesn't understand taxes. He could kill a man. He chooses not to. He still sleeps with a stuffed animal. If a League member yells at him he will cry. He'll leave them contemplating their own existence. He'll put shaving cream in their shoes.

More Posts from Rabbit-with-a-grapefruit-spoon and Others

Jason and Tim: *literally the most traumatic experience known to man, one that changes how anyone would look at them (e.g. Jason digging himself out of his own grave or Tim blowing up the leagues bases)*

Dick *absolutely mortified*: and you didn't tell me earlier because...?

Jason/Tim: idk, it never came up.

Dick: that's something you bring up!


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"Bruce adopts Billy" this and "Clark adopts Billy" that, but let me tell you as someone who was an independently feral ten year old, Billy Batson would fucking bite them

Part 3 To Previous Comic And It’s Very Dumb
Part 3 To Previous Comic And It’s Very Dumb
Part 3 To Previous Comic And It’s Very Dumb
Part 3 To Previous Comic And It’s Very Dumb
Part 3 To Previous Comic And It’s Very Dumb
Part 3 To Previous Comic And It’s Very Dumb

part 3 to previous comic and it’s very dumb

this little twink is getting serious and criminal for love

i want you all to know that there is an artist (carmen papalia) who, after he started using a white cane, assembled a 12 foot long white cane and began using it in downtown vancouver. the length of the cane made it functionally useless as a device and the only purpose it served was making him an obstacle for sighted people. dare i say… 2019 goals


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Steve actually loves science fiction but it’s infinitely funnier to piss Dustin off by repeatedly mispronouncing the names is the characters in Star Wars because, ā€œIt’s Skywalker, Steve. Not Stair-Master! And his name is Luke, not Lucas! No one is named Lucas.ā€

ā€œI think at least one person is.ā€

ā€œIn the movie.ā€

Dustin has recently discovered Doctor Who and is kinda a dick about explaining it to Steve. He heavily implies that Steve isn’t smart enough for the show like Steve’s mom doesn’t have a friend in England that tapes the new episodes and mails it to them.

Steve could share that information with Dustin but he’s not going to. Instead, when Dustin brings up The Doctor, Steve says, ā€œWoah, Doc Hagan got a tv show?ā€

ā€œIt’s not a show about your dentist, Steve!ā€

If Steve is trying to round up all the kids and they’re being particularly annoying, he’ll clap his hands together and says, ā€œC’mon, Ghost-bangers.ā€

The first thing he did after facing the demo-dogs was to memorize the entire D&D monster guide. He could tell Dustin this but D&D seems insufferable to him and it’s going to be way more satisfying when he catches the kid bullshitting an explanation and can call him out.

Robin knows about the stack of HG Wells books shelved in the den and Eddie definitely knows something is up. But Dustin? Nope.

There’s literally a picture on the mantle in the living room of him and his mom dressed as Spock and Nurse Chappell at a Star Trek convention when he was eight. Dustin walks passed it twice a week and has never noticed.


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I’m actually a dumbass. I’ve identified as asexual for years and as Demi-romantic for at least a few months comfortably by now and I literally only just now realised why I like the childhood friends to lovers trope so much. Genuinely pretty much all my favourite ships are that or at least in a similar vain of friends to lovers and I never fricking realised. It’s not like it’s the nearly exact way that my brain processes attraction nooo especially not when its friends to lovers with years of pining added into the mix like no duh why did you think you liked it, it’s not like you have any other kind of type. I am very annoyed by myself cause I knew that my demi-aro-ness was why I didn’t like so much when characters will have known each other for a week and then fallen in love or whatever other bullshit like that. But I genuinely did not make this connection in the slightest, somehow amazingly somehow I missed it entirely.Ā 


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A Butler's Duty

When Alfred does his desire to ensure those under his care are well? That desire, that need? Is more than enough, that plus the ectoplasm in Gotham. He forms into a ghost in the Infinite Realms. This happens a few years before Danny opens a portal. More than long enough for Alfred to have grown into his strange new existence.

So when he heard of a stable portal to the living realm? Well he was curious. Did it lead to his dimension? And then well, he went to have a look. And found a young teen. Who looked so like Bruce. Who felt such a need to look after that which was his. And he couldn't help but need to look after the boy. In only a few short weeks the boy was already so tired.

This just would not stand! Absolutely not! so he left the portal and checked on his new charges house. And it was barely fit for anyone! So, he did what he always had. He took charge of ensuring the place was clean and orderly. Ensured their was good, safe food available. And ensured his new charges would be as well as they could. And if that included beating the idea that ghosts were sentient into Master Danny's idiot parents head? Well. That would only help him tell them sooner!

Young Master Danny was a stubborn young man. But that was hardly a surprise! He gave in, in the end. Alfred's cookies always won in the end. The prospect of safe food and a safe house? Worked wonders. Now, if Alfred could just figure out if this was his home dimension or not... Alfred could only give so much support after all. Only give so much advice. An experienced hero would be a better mentor. At least Master Danny was allowing him to help tend his wounds now.


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broke: time is in charge because he’s the oldest

woke: warriors is in charge because he’s actually used to leading a group of people with varying skills and abilities and strategizing to take down a larger force

bespoke: wind is in charge because if anyone tries to challenge his authority he uses the wind waker to make it so that every time they all sit around a campfire together, the smoke always blows straight into the face of whoever has tried to disrespect him. nobody has challenged him since.

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rabbit-with-a-grapefruit-spoon - i have a sharpened spoon
i have a sharpened spoon

any pronouns - ace/aro

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