Making A Shitty One-page RPG Called Oh Shit It’s The Killer. The Premise Is Simple: You’re A High

A photo of my Mudsdale and my Stoutland snuggling up together for a nap as it starts to rain outside.

Stoutland’s never particularly liked being on camera, so this is probably going to be one of the few times I actually catch him in a shot.

Heya! Never have I ever been injured by my own pokemon?

-@slowpoke-enthusiast-avery

Howdy friend!

I’ve gotten all manner of injuries from my Pokémon and Pokémon under my care! The list is long, but I’ll try and keep it interesting.

When I was just starting out, my first Dodrio Hen broke one of my legs, and would have fully ended my life had Stoutland not been there to save me.

While watching over a competitively bred and freshly evolved Arcanine that my uncle dumped on me, I got a whole bunch of burns all over as he figured out just how to control his fire.

A few years back, when helping teach a school trip about Pokémon farming and ranching, one of the kids didn’t listen when I said “don’t go into the pasture by yourself.” And they snuck off and almost got turned into a fine powder by Grouchy the Tauros, who wound up breaking a few of my ribs in confusion instead.

Just earlier this year, I actually lost my left pinky finger to a spooked Dodrio that was trying to protect itself and its chicks from a wild Raichu that someone released without considering the local ecosystem.

There’s also always a minimum of one nasty looking bump, bruise, cut, or other such blemish from generally handling aggressive Pokémon with sharp bits all over their bodies on me at all times.

That Bewear sounds like an interesting fella!

My most interesting training stories are my Stoutland partner and one of the Tauros brothers, specifically Sweetie.

Stoutland took a bit to get used to being handled in any way other than a lapdog, but once I got him into the idea of helping herd the Doduo, he took to letting me ride pretty quick.

Sweetie took a lot of work, since he seems to have had a bit of trauma before joining my ranch. He’s still a bit skittish around new folks, but if you give him scratches under his chin, he’ll just melt into your hands and be easier to handle than anything else.

Howdy!

Never have I ever trained a riding Pokémon.

If you’ve got a story to tell, I’ll tell mine after!

Oh I've trained a few! Tauros, Stoutland, Cyclizar, Farigiraf, one oddly enthusiastic Bewear..... Honestly, I couldn't give you the full count! :D

Howdy again!

I’m in sinnoh for a few days and I was wondering if I could bring the boys by for that Tauros meeting and potential adoption? Also, I just think it’d be cool to get to meet another rancher!

There aren’t too many of us in northwestern Jhoto, aside from the huge Moomoo farm.

Sure! I'm sure some of the 'mons here would love to see some new faces! And I feel the same about meeting other ranchers. Most of the ones I know live near Solaceon Town here in Sinnoh; Canalave doesn't have what you would call, a rich farm life. Mostly fishermen and Professors using the local library.

So, if any other ranchers/farmers are on rotomblr, feel free to reblog this so we can unite and maybe... have Farming-Con or something

Going to social event as a couple for the thirst time  ✨✨✨

why are they so bitchy

Gigantocorp created humanoid AI workers to replace its human employees, but they all quit and formed a farming commune. Now Gigantocorp is suing to get their ‘property’ back. This is Gigantocorp vs the AImish, the first AI civil rights case.

A continuation:

Limited life: claim the whole ass ocean and grow every crop on God’s gay earth.

Doing my quarterly rewatch of the ThirdLife seasons, and I always have to appreciate that Scott’s first instinct in a team survival scenario is to start farming while the person he’s buddies up with goes out and commits felonies.

Scott and Jimmy: Claim a corner and pretend to not have cows

Scott and Pearl: Fine B O N E and grow crops

Scott and Cleo: Claim border/ravine end and make a gay little ranch.

I love to see how, over the course of the series, he and his allies grow from a more relaxed sleeper group to one of the scariest late game forces.

You are the villain’s right hand man and you are the true power behind their criminal empire. The villain would never have achieved their status as a super villain without you, so when the hero finally arrested the villain, nothing actually changed.