I Am An Overly Emotional Unemotional Clingy But Distant Private Person Who Likes To Overshare At Any

i used to think that icarus’ death was just a tragic accident—the kind so prevalent in greek mythology, where the hero survives the most dangerous part but tragedy befalls in the most unexpected/preventable way as a result of hubris/arrogance/carelessness. but icarus’ fate was no accident. tragic, yes, but also beautiful in its inevitability: a tribute to the inexorable entanglement between love and death, desire and destruction, intimacy and decay — all of which are ultimately just forms of want and loss. after all, everything has a price, an equal and opposite reaction.

desire is synonymous with fire. it’s something i think mortals are only capable of experiencing in tiny doses: little fires in our guts, live wires down our spine, warm flushes across our cheeks. like taking very small sips of too-hot tea, desire must be drawn out over a lifetime of intimacy—lest it burn us up completely. but apollo feels things with all his immortal intensity: he is pure fire and light and heat. i am not sure there exists a purer form of love than that of the sun.

this is why icarus’ fate is no accident, nor another allegory on the dangers of hubris. it was inevitable from the start. the same way achilles’ virility and vitality was paid for with his death at such a young age, the heat from apollo’s fleeting, fatal moment of desire for icarus is the same as a lifetime’s worth of slow-burning love between two mortals.

i like to believe that icarus didn’t lose his life—not exactly. he just lived it all at once in a single, blazing moment of intimacy with the sun.

“It is an art of the most exquisite kind to touch someone’s soul before touching their skin.”

— a.y.

richard siken / salma deera / jen mazza / joy ladin

The wizard express, Corfe castle, Dorset, England

Walt Whitman, ‘Song of Myself’, Leaves of Grass

[Text ID: “and what is reason? and what is love? and what is life?”]

" Disable a few laser cannons. What is the big deal? All we gotta do is find that one little wire. Oh mama."

Old Hollywood Asks

12 Angry Men- What’s your favorite movie? 

2001: A Space Odyssey- What’s your least favorite movie? 

A Streetcar Named Desire- What’s your favorite movie genre? 

All About Eve- Do you like to watch movies with subtitles? 

Apocalypse Now- What are your thoughts on children? Do you want any?

Ben-Hur- What’s the story/meaning behind your name?

Breakfast at Tiffany’s- What’s one of your favorite memories? 

Breathless- What’s one of your least favorite memories? 

Casablanca- Do you want to get married? 

Cat on a Hot Tin Roof- What was your childhood like? 

Citizen Kane- Do you prefer to read books or watch movies? 

Dinner at Eight- What’s your favorite book? 

Double Indemnity- Who is someone you look up to? 

From Here to Eternity- Describe your perfect/ideal life. 

Funny Face- What’s something that can always make you smile? 

Gone With the Wind- How many relationships have you been in? 

High Noon- What’s your ideal way to get warm? 

It’s a Wonderful Life- What makes life better for you? 

Jaws- What’s something from your past that you wish hadn’t happened? 

Key Largo- What’s your favorite ice cream/cake/cookie flavor? 

La Dolce Vita- What’s a talent of yours that you try to keep hidden from other people? 

Lawrence of Arabia- What was your first job? Did you enjoy it? 

My Fair Lady- What’s one of your favorite memories from when you were younger?

North by Northwest- What’s one of your least favorite memories from when you were younger? 

Notorious- What’s one thing you like about yourself? 

Psycho- What’s one thing you want to happen in the future (preferably within the next year)?

Rear Window- What’s one animal that you want to get? 

Rebel Without a Cause- If you were to have kids, what would you want to name them/how would you choose a name? 

Repulsion- What’s something you like to do in your free time? 

Roman Holiday- If you could know the honest answer to any question, what question would it be? 

Sabrina- If you could be with anyone right now, who would it be? 

Shane- Honestly, how are you doing right now? 

Singin’ in the Rain- Are you currently reading anything? If so, what is it? 

Some Like It Hot- What would you tell your teenage self, if you could?

Sunset Boulevard- Who is someone that you can’t help but be happy around? 

Taxi Driver- If you could change one thing that has happened to either yourself or someone you care about, what would you change? 

The 400 Blows- What is one place you want to go to? 

The Apartment- What is something that has impacted who you are today? 

The Godfather- What is something that calms you? 

The Graduate- Are you religious/spiritual? 

The Maltese Falcon- What’s your favorite holiday? How do you like to spend it? 

The Man Who Knew Too Much- How do you show affection and love? 

The Philadelphia Story- What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?

The Third Man- Have you ever lost someone that you were close to? 

The Wizard of Oz- What’s something that helps you relax? 

Titanic- Have you ever been forced into doing something that you didn’t want to do?

To Have and Have Not- What’s something that not a lot of people know about you? 

Tokyo Story- How was your last relationship? Why did it end, and who ended it? 

Touch of Evil- Have you ever done drugs/drank alcohol? 

Vertigo- Have you ever been in love? 

Witness for the Prosecution- Give a random fact about yourself

Wuthering Heights- Do you like cards/card games? Which is your favorite? 

Gordon Parks, “Untitled, Shady Grove, Alabama ”, 1956

― Perks of Being a Wallflower (2013)

“Do you think if people knew how crazy you really were, no one would ever talk to you?”