Post 3

Life Lately

 I turned 18 in October last year. I graduated high school this June and I’m starting college on September.

I didn’t get to apply to my dream school in the city. My parents think that I will prioritize going to rallies and mobs instead of focusing on my studies. They’re not confident that they would be able to support me too.

Two days before my high school graduation, I received emails from two universities. One from a private university in my mom’s home province, where I wanted to take legal management on, and one from a state university where I will be taking a course where I do not really see myself in.

Some of my friends are going to take the program they’re interested in. Some of them will move to different cities and pursue the program they want, start a new life. I want what they have. I wish I could be in better circumstances but I know I have no choice but deal with the cards I was given.

Lately, my life feels stagnant. I have been pressuring myself too much, which I know is not good, but I don’t know what to do. I feel like the world is moving too fast and I could not catch up. Like I’m falling behind.

I also have a lot of worries lately. I failed a test on a job I was applying for. I was looking forward to get in because it will help financially. I know that I’m incoming freshman but I want to start saving up for the future.

With everything I’m feeling, I should learn how to take it easy. I should not be worrying. I’m young, I have a lot of time. I know I shouldn’t use my present worrying too much about adulting and the future. But at some point, I feel like I’m too old to be wasting time. 

"و لو أن إبليس يومًا رآكِ، لقبل عينيك ثم اهتدى"

"And if the devil were to see you, he would kiss your eyes and repent"

-farouq gouida

“Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back, everything is different.”

— C.S. Lewis

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.”

— Leo Tolstoy

If you can't heal someone's wound, don't touch it.

“I’d like to repeat the advice that I gave you before, in that I think you really should make a radical change in your lifestyle and begin to boldly do things which you may previously never have thought of doing, or been too hesitant to attempt. So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun. If you want to get more out of life, Ron, you must lose your inclination for monotonous security and adopt a helter-skelter style of life that will at first appear to you to be crazy. But once you become accustomed to such a life you will see its full meaning and its incredible beauty. And so, Ron, in short, get out of Salton City and hit the Road. I guarantee you will be very glad you did. But I fear that you will ignore my advice. You think that I am stubborn, but you are even more stubborn than me. You had a wonderful chance on your drive back to see one of the greatest sights on earth, the Grand Canyon, something every American should see at least once in his life. But for some reason incomprehensible to me you wanted nothing but to bolt for home as quickly as possible, right back to the same situation which you see day after day after day. I fear you will follow this same inclination in the future and thus fail to discover all the wonderful things that God has placed around us to discover. Don’t settle down and sit in one place. Move around, be nomadic, make each day a new horizon. You are still going to live a long time, Ron, and it would be a shame if you did not take the opportunity to revolutionize your life and move into an entirely new realm of experience. You are wrong if you think Joy emanates only or principally from human relationships. God has placed it all around us. It is in everything and anything we might experience. We just have to have the courage to turn against our habitual lifestyle and engage in unconventional living. My point is that you do not need me or anyone else around to bring this new kind of light in your life. It is simply waiting out there for you to grasp it, and all you have to do is reach for it. The only person you are fighting is yourself and your stubbornness to engage in new circumstances.”

(via amargedom)

showed my best friend a picture of Quinn Hughes and she said he lowkey looks like Luke Hemmings

i agree that happiness is a choice but i have also realized that not everyone has happiness in their options