Having Depression Makes Your Friends Seem Like The Coolest Most Put Together People On Earth Like Wow...

anyone else hate asking for help and would rather set themselves on fire than do it or is that just me

Baldur's Gate 3 x Disco Elysium

hey does anyone want to bleed out in my arms it has to be weird

Surprise! You thought you were getting one chapter today, but you're actually getting three!

(As in, one for Wings Outstretched and two otherwise unwritten moments from act 1 that I did here -)

Hehehe I wrote so much.

And we’re off! Next story is up on AO3, and updates should come at least once every ten days as with previous (I just realised I’m working off a tenday-based schedule, this was not intentional), and I will try to post here in case of a delay.

Things that work in fiction but not real life

torture getting reliable information out of people

knocking someone out to harmlessly incapacitate them for like an hour

jumping into water from staggering heights and surviving the fall completely intact

calling the police to deescalate a situation

rafting your way off a desert island

correctly profiling total strangers based on vibes

effectively operating every computer by typing and nothing else

ripping an IV out of your arm without consequences

heterosexual cowboy

Chapter 15!!!!

Bit of an odd time in the day for posting, but I'm going to be busy later and I didn't want it to be delayed so SURPRISE!

You may have noticed the chapter count has gone up to 17 – I'm aware I said it would be 16 earlier but some things got shifted around, so. It may still go up to 18 depending on how long the final chapter gets, we shall see.

And we’re off! Next story is up on AO3, and updates should come at least once every ten days as with previous (I just realised I’m working off a tenday-based schedule, this was not intentional), and I will try to post here in case of a delay.

I do love that in the epilogue when astarion is like “so it turns out killing people is actually fine as long as you’re doing it in the name of hero-ing” you can be like “yeah bro I tried to tell you that” and he’s like “yeah but I don’t listen to you when you talk”

Okay, there's going to be another delay for the next chapter. The problem with having a plan is I keep seeing the nice short summery paragraph I've written in advance, and I'm like, "oh that's nothing, that won't take any time at all." and then guess what. That paragraph had no detail in it on purpose. The detail takes time to write.

Also, I've been trying to get to bed at a reasonable time each night to maintain healthy sleeping habits, when I used to stay up late and let myself go feral over a word document, so that's slowing me down as well.

Ultimately, I'm giving myself time limits to ensure that it is finished eventually, because I want to prove to myself that I can finish something if I try - I just need to rework my writing habits into something more sustainable and stop expecting myself to be able to write so much in one day like I used to.

So, to get the point, I'm giving myself another 5 day extension on this one (aiming for the 14th) so I actually have time to finish it up properly. I'm considering maybe extending all the gaps between chapters to 15 days in future, but I'll leave it at 10 for now and we'll see how I do.

As always, thanks to anyone who just reads my stuff at all, with a bonus thanks to anyone who leaves kudos, or especially comments. Every time someone reaches back from across the void it makes it a lot easier to remember why I'm still doing this, why I shouldn't just give up, even when I frustrate myself with delays and procrastination (and do feel free to send me asks about anything to do with the story and characters, I love that shit).

I'm going to continue trying my best, but I'm going to try being a little gentler to myself along the way from now on - and I might wander away from More Graves and into something a little different a few times, as I try to re-embrace the fun that can come from being creative, and remind myself of the excitement of inspiration that helped me come up with this story in the first place.

do you all see my vision here

baldur's gate 3 is just. break the abuse and trauma cycle. being forced to believe a certain way is wrong. there is more outside of the small window that i perceived the world to be. i will create my own identity. maybe the people i thought loved me did not, in fact, have my best interests at heart. i need to find the clown's body parts so the drag queen can resurrect him. my destiny is not written in stone.