Eren’s First Time At Some Fancy Event?  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

”I just wanna make you feel okay, but all you do is look the other way.”

I feel u Levi.

Draco: When you said you did magic in bed, this isn't what I was expe-

Harry [holding up 9 of clubs]: Is this your card?

Draco [softly]: Holy shit

Duffers: so, Billy is dead and we finished this Harringrove nightmare haha-

Harringrove fandom: YOU let us in.

Duffers: oh no

Harringrove fandom: And now you’re going to have to let us stay,

Duffers: *sweating* oh fuck-

(Steve is getting Billy to cover for him at the video store)

Steve: Okay, pop quiz on working in the video store. What do you do if a customer starts choking while eating candy?

Billy: Look, if I have to cut a hole in someone's throat, I'll cut a hole in someone's throat.

Steve: Cutting a hole in people can't be your answer for everything. Next one. What do you do if there's a fire?

Billy: Follow-up question, did I or did I not start said fire?

lance: uhh….are you wearing my jacket?

keith: yes, and there’s a perfectly good reason for that

lance: what’s the reason?

keith: i’m gay

Harry: DO YA REMEMBER

Draco:

The Weasleys:

The Malfoys:

Draco, confused: What?... Harry we're in the middle of our vows-

Hermione, unable to contain herself: THE 21ST NIGHT OF SEPTEMBER

[on a date]

me: so, enemies to lovers or friends to lovers?

my date: actually, I prefer established relationships-

me, shoving breadsticks into my purse: I think we’re done here

Jjskajwjhsjwhs

*phone rings on dec 25th*

Steve: *sleepily* hello?

Billy: Happy chrimmus!

Steve: Billy? what the fuck -

Billy: Is chrismun!

Steve: It's 2am

Billy: Merry crisis!

Steve: I'm so tired

Billy: Merry chrysler!

Steve: please stop