Corrival Student: Oi, Cunt! Listen Here Ya Fanny

“People think they know you. They think they know how you’re handling a situation. But the truth is no one knows. No one knows what happens after you leave them, when you’re lying in bed or sitting over your breakfast alone and all you want to do is cry or scream. They don’t know what’s going on inside your head—the mind-numbing cocktail of anger and sadness and guilt. This isn’t their fault. They just don’t know. And so they pretend and they say you’re doing great when you’re really not. And this makes everyone feel better. Everybody but you.”

— William H. Woodwell Jr.

I think Pierce Brosnan may be my new face claim for Baron ♥w♥

sp as scottish tweets pt. 1: val’s family

this may be the best post idea i’ve had yet

val:

desmond:

melissa:

beryl & the twins:

alice:

fergus:

gordon:

Skulduggery Pleasant AU: Valkyrie is persuaded by kenspeckle to leave skukduggery and work with the irish sanctuary in a different capacity/deal with the magic/mortal-life divide differently.

[This ask is a prompt for this headcanons post]

First of all, let’s take a moment to appreciate this tag courtesy of the AO3 Tag Generator:

[image reads: “sappy scientific femslash”]

Surprising absolutely no-one, I am 100% here for Valkyrie and Clarabelle as magiscience wives. Lab partners, even. 

Like, sure, Kenspeckle could get Val to do something that isn’t either Skeleton Detective Assisting or Sanctuary Scientisting, but also. Clarabelle is right there y’all. And Val likes coats.

Ghastly would be delighted! He would make the best labcoats!

Now for the plot nonsense. Handwavey I-haven’t-read-these-books-in-many-years ye-gods-there’s-some-kind-of-second-series-I-haven’t-touched-isn’t-there? time, but I’d imagine some kind of complicated Darquesse related fuckery goes down anyway, because look at China. Being a librarian has not stopped her from being very much involved in drama!! I see no reason for Val to be any different.

I just typed “does valkyrie cain like math” into google and one of the suggestions along the way was “does valkyrie cain have a girlfriend”. oh my god !!! oh my god !!!!!

But anyway! I cannot remember if she likes math! I think the reflection likes at least one of the STEM things in school though. A Valkyrie+Stephanie teamup sounds like a good time.

Also, Valkyrie gets a dog at the end of the series right? She should still get a dog. The dog should have its own set of lab gear. 

Like, the goggles and the boots and the coat. Ghastly should be the one making the dog’s clothes. Ghastly should be chasing this dog around the shop with a teacup. 

Yes.

I feel called out by your post about Tanith because I have a big family and the first thing I do when I encounter my assortment of people in the ~12 age range is compliment their collection of injuries and battle scars. Also lowkey the best insight into Dexter is the little musings about his history and the small displays of restraint and mercy he demonstrates while possessed by the Remnant. Which is still out there somewhere. Just so you know. Darquesse let it go and it could be anywhere now.

Well, there's a difference between having a scraped knee from playing (or other stuff normal kids do) and having huge ass bruises, because you had to jump from a rooftop in order to escape from a vampire...

Yess, Dexter is one of my favorite characters. Compared to Tanith he wasn't as cruel while being possessed, but I think that had a lot to do with the Remnant. Still, he left Val to die when Samuel attacked and he kidnapped Alice. The only mercy he showed was not killing her.

You mean the remnant is still out somewhere? I'm not sure, but I think Darquesse killed it after ripping it out of Dex.

thank you @sw-incorrect-quotes for letting me draw this!

based on this 

What do you think China’s childhood was like? Every book, her view on it seems to change..

tbh it’s actually quite interesting seeing China’s different takes on her childhood, because in a way I don’t think she’s ever really recovered from it unlike Bliss, who got out at such an early age. Indeed, often when discussing her past, China always compares herself to her brother, portraying herself as weaker, slower in escaping - but the interesting thing is, she never really mentions what it was they escaped from, rather than just the mentioned indoctrination of all believers.

But the first time she really mentions her opinion of her childhood, and not just her general experience as a worshipper, she brushes it off, saying:

It had been a happy childhood. Completely insane, but happy. - MC

What’s even more interesting is through the rest of this extract, China keeps making jokes about her questions of faith + the general situation

True, she had generally had more fun in the old days... and she didn’t have to spend half her day praying. She’d never been able to understand why the Faceless Ones weren’t praying to her. - MC

But then, what I find interesting is the subtext in any of her memories of her childhood - they’re awful and yet she almost normalises them. And even when she admits to some of her troubling memories, they’re pretty watered down:

All though her childhood she’d had trouble sleeping, plagued as she was by the stories her parents would tell her of the Faceless Ones.

Doesn’t that make you feel happy? And China had said, No, Mother, it gives me bad dreams, and her mother’s face had changed in an instant and China had spent the next three days on her knees, praying to the Faceless Ones, begging for their forgiveness. - B

It’s a pretty horrifying image, a young girl (which China is very much implied to be in this extract) being forced onto her knees for three days straight because she dared to voice her fears.

Idk if it’s a coping method or something, but in a way, I see it as China almost blocking out the trauma of her childhood - we see her mention it occasionally, but most of the time she just laughs it off (which is really worrying)

I think something people often forget is that unlike some worshippers of the Faceless ones, China didn’t choose to be one, she was born into it - she had no choice, she was practically indoctrinated and it’s clear that some traumatic things happened behind the scenes that enforced her to stay obedient

What’s even more interesting is that when China leaves the church of the Faceless Ones, she doesn’t go straight to the good guys, she isolates herself and she also has some very interesting conversations about myths/fantastical elements in the world, with this being one example:

“I’ve heard nonsense. I’ve heard something that doesn’t even deserve to be called a rumour. - SP

Seems like another one of her coping methods up until TFO is to deny the existence of these gods, these legends, because in a way China never got over the indoctrination of the Church - if she fled and the gods were real, she’s damned. So if she brushes it off, just like her childhood trauma, pretending it’s not real, then she can cope - she’s not damned, which seems to be a prominent fear of her childhood

untroubled by half-remembered visions of doom and damnation + she had hidden her fears from her parents and suffered those nightmares in silence. - B

It’s interesting to see the relapse of faith in this most recent book - I’ve discussed my predictions for China in this post but I think it’s pointing towards an unraveling mind in many ways, as we also see China having a lot of flashbacks to her past as if she’s starting to relieve a lot of her repressed trauma - that could be because of Solace’s influence or something else, who knows..

Padme: We're having a baby!

Ahsoka: Congratulation—

Anakin: [Slamming adoption papers on the table] It's you, sign here.

I will die on this hill

time for a little sp meta

i’ve been wanting to do this for a long time, but it’s been rotting in my drafts box for ages and i just remembered

i’ve been thinking about it, and i think magic could possibly prevent sorcerers from getting cancer. possibly.

my reasoning, you ask? of course, cells would die more slowly, but it’s unrealistic to think that skin, blood and hair cells etc would do so, because then all sorcerers would be bald and skinless (that said, slower brain cell turnover might explain a few things).

so if these cells are renewing themselves a regular amount for centuries, it stands to reason that every sorcerer would get some form of cancer at some point due to the increased chance of cell mutations and therefore cancer. this is never discussed, so we can either assume that a) they are immune, or b) they’ve found a cure

i think that if they had found a cure, somebody like kenspeckle grouse would have leaked it to mortals for the greater good, but since that’s also never discussed, we can (again) assume that that’s not the case and consider that sorcerers are (possibly) immune to cancer