I Am Not The Divine Masculine Or The Divine Feminine I Am The Divine Comedy And You Will Address Me As

Last Stand of Dead Men - Chapter 60: One little word

Teacher: Stephanie could you take out the trash?

Valkyrie: *pulls out gun*

Teacher: NO, NOT LIKE THAT!

Percy Jackson and the Dad Debacle™️

I feel like Never is supposed to be the sassy best friend but he’s just straight up mean to Omen and it kinda makes me sad

Yelena Belova is a delight 🙌

me, quietly whispering to the ao3 page of an author who doesn’t even know I exist: I am obsessed with you

10. Dex in a tux at the requiem ball

11. talking about his cat Sabrina who showed her love by scratching him

because The Maleficant 7 and Armageddin Outa Here are also valid

Okay, listen up gang, what was your favorite Dexter Vex moment:

1. “Thanks Gladys!”

2. “Wilhelm, this is a private conversation!”

3. “Oh God I’m blushing, I’m actually blushing for you!” 

4. “They just want to hand me over which is actually pretty nice.”

5. the draugr / draugar explanation scene “They’re two different words.”

6. the t-shirt scene ya know

7. “the dead not-gender-specific persons??”

8. the cowboy dexter in the “apocalypse now” collection  

9. when they were about to jump down the hole in book 8 and skulduggery went: “first one at the bottom wins” and dexter was first to jump 

The original percy jackson series is about cycles of abuse and neglect, right. Were introduced to percy as a kid who has clearly been left behind by a school system that has given up on him, restless and unengaged and self-defetist because hes been given nothing that works for him and no one even tries to meet him where he is. Then hes told no, listen, your neurodivergence is amazing and you just need to be given something that actually utilizes your unique palatte. And thats obviously the uplifting idea rick wanted for his kids, right. But once we get to know chb the same cycles are happening there too. There are kids "left behind" there too for one reason or another, because their parents dont want to claim them, because their parents werent important enough to get a cabin. Do you get it, all the kids who dont fit the most common neurotypes get shoved into the same closet. Kids are being left in a cruel world to fend for themselves without the tools they need. Theyre dying because no one bothered to accommodate them. Its such an obvious parallel that the first chapter introduces a teacher whos written to be especially hard on percys disability and she turns out to literally be one of these monsters trying to kill him. Meanwhile sally jackson tells him she named him after Perseus because she wanted a redemption for a hero whos story ended in tragedy. Meanwhile every book in the series replicates a greek myth step for step until the moment they break the cycle. Annabeth, playing Odysseus, is talked down from her hubris and grounded by her friends. Percy, playing Heracles, meets someone wronged by the original Heracles and rights his wrongs by refusing to go down the same selfish path as him. Monsters are reborn because they are--as the books explicitly call them--achetypes. These kids are stuck inside the cyclical nature of mythology because thats what happens to mythology, it gets retold over and over again. But these are the kids who have to live it. The series ends with percy being offered immortality and he rejects it because he wants to use his godly favor to force them to break their cycle of neglecting their kids. The series ends with a declaration that we cant keep letting this happen. The very first book offees the same choice. It ends with percy refusing to keep the head of medusa as a spoil of war, refusing his heroic reward. He lets his mother have the head and use it to kill gabe. Isnt that fucking crazy for a kids book? Gabe wasnt a Monster. He wasnt going to Turn to Dust and Disappear in a narratively convenient way. He was a living breathing mortal dude and percy and his mom killed him without remorse. Break the cycle of abuse!!!! Dont let this happen again!!! Anyway thats why the original percy jackson series is Hey where are you going with our breadsticks

The war between the sanctuaries lasted roughly two months, so Val´s been on her period at least once during that time, right? 

I can so imagine her being even grumpier than usual and of course it has to coincidence with a mission where they have to hike for several days AGAIN. That´s downright annoying on a good day, but when she´s on her period Val is fuckin angry, because it HURTS and all she wants is a nice hot-water bottle and some chocolate. Instead she has to walk the whole freakin day. 

The other dead men are really confused. They can clearly tell she´s in pain, but they have no idea what´s going on. Even Skulduggery can´t tell. He´s been a skeleton for so long that he just doesn´t consider some basic human functions anymore. Anyways, it takes them so long to figure it out that it´s downright embarrassing. But once they figure it out, they make a point of buying her chocolate as soon as they are back from the mission and even after the war, after Valkyrie was gone for five years, Skulduggery continues bringing her chocolate once a month. Gotta keep the monster fed if you don´t wanna get chewed out yourself. 

Valkyrie just thinks it´s creepy that he knows better when she´s gonna be on her period the next time than she does herself. Like what the fuck? There´s observant and then there´s creepy, Skulduggery! She doesn´t mind the chocolate though. That´s always welcome.

Reblog this with your star sign and your favorite book in Phase 1 of Skulduggery Pleasant in the tags. It’s for science