This Is What Rasputin Would've Wanted.

I’m a pacifist like institutionally but I’m absolutely certain that violence solves at least some problems on a much smaller level. I don’t believe in wars or nuclear weapons or military campaigns I do believe in the power of that guy who punched the nazi in the face so hard his entire media presence immediately crumbled to dust

A random list of weird things I read in GOT/ASOIAF fics, in no particular order:

This one where a dude decided ravens weren’t cool enough and replaced them with eagles. I know I’ve complained about this before, I WILL do so again, eagles are all eye, no brain. Pigeons can actually do the work but no one loves them I am going to use pigeons in one of my works.

The one where Robb physically assaults Sansa after rescuing her from the Lannisters because she, get this, refused to marry a Lannister. You know, the disgraced house that she was held hostage and abused by, that one. For some reason the narrative was trying to blame HER for the conflict, rather than her brother, who was trying to marry off the PRINCESS OF THE NORTH to the house he had already defeated.

The ones where Oberyn “rescues” Sansa by marrying her himself and then Ellaria is just fine with it and becomes basically Sansa’s maid/grooms her alongside Oberyn. If I had a nickel for every fic along those lines I’d read, I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird it happened twice.

The one where Sansa killed her rapist(a Lannister OC) and his supposed good guy son was all mad at her, instead of just being like, “Oh, shit, my dad was a rapist, good thing he’s dead.” I’m starting to suspect this fandom has a misogyny problem.

The one where Catelyn was, like, randomly evil? You know I’m not a Catelyn fan. She is not invited to my dinners. But this one had her being all evil and stupid and decided that Barbrey Dustin(?) was supposed to be the good mom to the stark kids. It was really dumb.

The one where Arya and Sansa switch personalities and Sansa is forcibly married to Jaime Lannister and decides to just have sex with him. When she’s, like, twelve. I wasn’t going to like the fic anyhow bc it’s by that author who likes to pretend quitting a fic is the same as finishing it, but that one was really dumb.

The one where an OC sensed a “secret evil” inside Sansa and decided Sansa was OPPRESSING HER RELIGION by inviting her to a sewing circle. Bear in mind, Sansa had literally just seen the OC, smiled, and invited her to hang out. Amazing. Simply amazing.

There are a lot of fics out there where Sansa randomly decides she was wrong and she IS a warrior with sword after all, and they just make no sense and bother me so much.

There’s this weird thread going thru certain pieces of fandom where they seem to think the problem with book/season 1 Arya is that she doesn’t just submit and become a little tradwife, rather than the fact that she’s an obnoxious little jerk who throws tantrums and treats the people around her unkindly for no reason. Like, there’s a lot to criticize about Arya, but her rejection of traditional gender roles isn’t one of them.

Presumed incompetence. It’s so weird, but despite the narrative having to go out of its way to kill Robb, capture Sansa, do the whole Arianne plot goes wrong thing, etc, etc, fandom seems to have taken this stance that the Starks and the Martells and the other “good guys” are somehow incompetent and stupid for, ya know, having ethics.

Presumed competence. Tywin is a bad lord, father, brother, and son. Danaerys is a literal slaver who only alters her trajectory when she can’t afford the slaves she wanted to buy, as well as a self deceptive hypocrite. Yet many fics out there would have us see both of these different sides of fascism as somehow pragmatic and heroic. In reality, they’re both shitty at their jobs, and even Danaerys is, while sympathetic, not a particularly good person.

Presumed Ned Stark good guy. Ned is a complicated dude, despite fandom’s large dismissal of him as a “too good for this sinful world” tragic hero, and I wont argue that he definitely will do the right thing if presented with an opportunity(unless the right thing involves treating his eldest daughter with actual care and consideration). However, this is also a guy who lives in a country with a large slave soldier penal colony made up of mostly non-violent property crime offenders, who plays favourites amongst his children, and has not only held a teenager hostage since the boy was a child, but also forces him to attend what basically amounts to rehearsals for his own murder. So, yeah. He’s complex.

The idea that the old gods are superior to the new is kind of straight up disputed by the books, yet fandom keeps churning out fic after fic where Sansa(and it’s almost always Sansa despite the fact that she canonically worships both sets of gods) repents of her sin of coming from a multi religion family and turns completely to the old gods. Which is just dumb. They both kind of suck in different ways.

in hysterics

What does the arab in your carrd mean? Is it like afab and amab?

.. i’m palestinian

I will never not be OBSESSED with the Famous trope + Found Family trope with the Party 😭 The headlines would be so chaotic? Like:

Famous Rockstar Eddie Munson is seen eating lunch with two time Pulitzer winner Nancy Wheeler, Highest Paid Photographer Jonathan Byers and Successful Entrepreneur Argyle Alvez. How does he know these people???

Three time Grammy Winner Eddie Munson seen in a McDonald's with World Renowned Astronaut Dustin Henderson and New York Times Best Seller Will Byers-Wheeler and Mike Byers-Wheeler. What the actual fuck???

Eddie Munson, seen in a Chicago Bulls game looking confused as hell, mere seconds after finding out his second album just went Multi-platinum, with his husband, Steve Munson. Also seen in pictures, Eddie Munson hugging point guard Lucas Sinclair and his wife, Max Sinclair. How???

MSG Sold Out Performer Eddie Munson seen in Chicago Medical Center with World Renowned Surgeon Dr. Erica Sinclair. Our insiders say that the rockstar is FINE and was only having lunch with the doctor. What in the multiverse is happening???

Eddie Munson and his husband seen in line at the book signing of rising Linguistics Author Robin Buckley. They ended up laughing so hard when they reached the author, they almost got kicked out. Turns out they all knew each other???

Rock Star Eddie Munson bringing packed lunch in pajamas to a small Chicago preschool where husband, Steve Munson and known friend, Jane Hopper works. Why??? How??? What???

Third most followed person on Instagram Eddie Munson, just broke the internet by posting a group picture with Nancy Wheeler, Robin Buckley, Jonathan Byers, Argyle Alvez, Dustin Henderson, Lucas, Max and Erica Sinclair, Mike and Will Byers-Wheeler, his husband Steve Munson and family friend Jane Hopper. HOW DO THEY ALL KNOW EACH OTHER?! WHAT A WEIRD GROUP?!

The more people speculate, the more they say shit. Like people ask them how they know each other and they all just throw out the weirdest answers.

Nancy gets asked in a press conference how she knows Rock Star Eddie Munson? Nancy answers with, "I was driving myself to California when I was 19 and I picked him up as a hitch hiker along the way. We’ve been friends since then."

Robin gets asked in a lecture how she knows the Sinclair Clan? Robin answers with, "I go way back with Dr. Erica. She once saved me from Russian Doctors trying to cut my toe nails."

Eddie goes on an interview in National TV and the host asks how he's friends with Argyle and Jon? Eddie answers with, "I got kidnapped by a killer clown when I was 17. They saved me by crushing the clown's still beating heart with their own bare hands."

Steve gets bombarded with questions online of how he knows Nancy, Robin, Jon, Argyle and even Eddie (his husband)? Steve answers with, "We were stuck in detention every Saturday when we were in senior year. We all became friends when Eddie Munson started singing Don't You (Forget About Me)."

Will and Mike gets asked in an interview about their friendship with Basketball Star, Lucas Sinclair? Will says, “Lucas once gave my dog CPR, ultimately, saving it’s life and we’ve been friends since then.” and Mike just goes, “Who???”

Erica once got asked how she knew Genius Astronaut, Dustin Henderson. Erica rolls her eyes, “That boy owes me his life. Ask him, not me.”

Dustin gets asked how he knows Eddie Munson. Dustin goes with, “Eddie once saved me from a feral army of bats and almost died. I’ve never let go of him since then.” The fans think this one might actually be true, they’ve seen the scars on Eddie, they’ve got theories and Dustin just gave them a puzzle piece.

Argyle got asked in a Business Magazine how he knows this weird, interconnected group. Argyle says, “Oh dude! Those are my life long friends! It started with a pizza van, a dead man, and a road trip to Utah. There was also a bald girl involved. In the end, the real treasure really is the friends we make along the way.”

Jonathan gets asked how he knows Eddie Munson. Jon gives the softest, sweetest smile and says, “We were in a satanic cult together.”

Jane Hopper gets asked once in public (how she knows all these famous people), someone filmed it and it went viral on Twitter. El says, verbatim, “Oh. It all started when I was kidnapped by an evil scientist who tested stuff on me like I was a lab rat. Long story short, they saved my life and they are my family.” By then people already don’t believe any of them because they all give out the most ridiculous answers. Hopper still grounds her for that even though she doesn’t live with him anymore. (Owens, who hasn't called them in 15 years, reached out with a warning).

It's absolutely wild to me that girls and women are expected to wear bathing suits that look like that. That in some cases don't cover more than underwear. And when inevitably they feel uncomfortable having their whole ass and thighs out around strangers, we treat it like this is a self esteem issue that should be solved through body positivity. Maybe we should focus less on trying to force people to believe they should be comfortable exposing themselves and more on, idk.... normalizing bathing suits that allow some dignity? Male swim trunks literally go almost down to the knees. You have to go to a speciality store or order online to find a suit designed for women like that. And for that matter, even cisgender men shouldn't be expected to feel comfortable walking around shirtless in public.

If you like the standard swimsuits and enjoy wearing them, good for you. It's just absolutely wild to me that that's the default we presume everyone should be comfortable in.

au where Steve is a famous Disney kid and Eddie is a teenaged singer-songwriter. They get pushed together at events because they're close in age, but they just quietly dislike each other.

Steve's got a new show starting, a spinoff of the one that made him a household name. They hire a newcomer, Robin Buckley, to play his best friend and the two quickly become BFF in real life.

The show runs for two seasons but when it comes time to renegotiate contracts, neither star is interested. They're older now, ready to live life on their terms and not the company's, or in Steve's case, his parents.

As soon as the finale airs, Robin and Steve celebrate by going to a gay club. A few weeks later, an interview is released where Steve comes out as bi and talks about how his parents mistreated him; how they worked with the network to pressure him to be a perfect "all-American" kid even off screen.

Meanwhile, Eddie's an impossible level of famous. He's had number-one hits, won a Grammy, headlined an arena tour, achieved every dream he had for himself as a kid growing up in a trailer park in Indiana. He's not shocked by the news that Steve is leaving Hollywood, but he's flabbergasted that the guy isn't straight. When Eddie reads the interview, he gets this weird pang in his chest, almost like regret. But he never even liked Steve.

Steve isn't in the news again and Eddie doesn't think of him for a long time.

Steve goes to college. He loves it. Not because he's great in his classes, or anything, but because he's free to be himself for the first time. He makes friends and goes to parties and relaxes. He and Robin share an apartment.

After a few semesters, Steve decides to take a couple of theater classes, and is quickly cast in campus productions. In the vague anonymity of college theater he rediscovers his love of acting. No one has expectations of him, no one forces him to perform. He graduates and slowly starts appearing in small roles in Indie films, gathering critical acclaim. He feels good. Happy. Hopeful.

Eddie is blissfully unaware of Steve's career resurgence, experiencing his own musical highpoints, until the day where he's scrolling Twitter, sees a Variety headline that's getting a bunch of attention, "Steve Harrington in talks to star in Max Mayfield's first film." Eddie's livid.

"Maxine, what the fuck?" He growls when she answers his call.

They grew up together in the same Indiana trailer park. When she moved to Hollywood to start a career as a screenwriter, Eddie was by her side. And when her first script wound up on the Black List, his involvement on the soundtrack and original songs sealed her production deal.

She gives a long suffering sigh. "Munson," she grumbles. "I know you have a weird history with this guy, but I swear he's the right choice."

"He's a stuck up rich boy who's never been in trouble in his life."

"He's changed."

"Doubtful," Eddie sneers.

"Look. I'll set-up a meeting. Come hang out and you'll see what I mean." Before she hangs up she adds, "Call me Maxine again and I'll end you."

They invite Harrington to Eddie's recording studio. His hopes are not high for this meeting, so he's already a little thrown when Steve Harrington walks in, all grown up. He's in a crimson sweater, tight jeans, hair grown long so that it flops around his face in tousled waves that actually look genuine, windswept and golden. Eddie's eyes instinctively trace the scatter of moles on Harrington's face and neck, a pang of something hitting deep in his gut. Fuck, this dude is beautiful.

"Harrington," he greets, sticks out his hand. Eddie barely hears the answering, "Munson," because instead of a handshake, Harrington pulls Eddie in for a hug. Muscles bunch under the sleeves of the sweater, against Eddie's chest, and he's assaulted by the scent of cedar and sunshine and Steve. Eddie's not prepared for any of this.

They make small talk, Harrington sharing about going to college, falling in love with theater, Robin Buckley who he calls his soulmate. Eddie's head rings with how wrong he was about this guy; the pretty kid he grew up alongside who seemed to have the world in his hands. Max was right, he's perfect. Except.

"Let's get down to it, Harrington," Eddie says. Can't bring himself to call him Steve yet, feels that will somehow change everything and he's not ready. "I'll admit that Mayfield had the right idea about you, but can you sing? Play guitar? You have to perform my music, dude. That's not a small ask."

Harrington smirks, asks for a guitar. He gets it settled across his lap before he speaks. "I started taking piano lessons when I was 4. Voice and guitar at 7."

Eddie belatedly recalls that Harrington's parents were the worst kind of stage-parents, pushing their cute kid to perform even as he sobbed about wanting to play soccer with his friends instead of going to auditions. He has a moment of shame that he forgets as the other man begins to play. It's one of Eddie's biggest hits, a ballad about a teenaged broken heart from a kid whose name he can't even remember.

Harrington's hair flops in a swoop over his forehead, his fingers move across the strings with ease, skill. His voice is a rasp, close mimic to Eddie's own, but not quite deep enough. Goosebumps spread across Eddie's arms, his neck, and warmth pools low in his gut.

Steve finishes the song, looks up, cheeks glowing pink, honey eyes bright. Eddie's fucking gone for this guy. He wants so badly he might choke on it.

"Good?" Steve asks.

Eddie's embarrassed suddenly. Unsure. He tugs at his hair. "Yeah," he laughs. "Good."

He reaches out to take the guitar, the one Steve's already handing to him, and their hands brush. Eddie flushes. Their eyes meet and Steve smiles. Eddie's thoughts are consumed with the desire to kiss his plush pink mouth.

"You wanna get dinner? Just you and me?" Steve asks.

"Yeah, Steve," he laughs. "I'd love to."

🎬🎸🎬🎸

Fifteen Months Later

"Former Teen Heartthrobs Make Love Connection?"

Fans of musician Eddie Munson and former child star, Steve Harrington, were in for the surprise of their lives last night as the men arrived together for the premier of Harrington's new movie, Small Town Sins, written by up-and-coming screenwriter Max Mayfield, featuring original music by Munson. While Harrington's performance and the movie itself are garnering quite a bit of positive buzz, it's being overshadowed by gossip about Harrington and Munson's budding romance. They walked the red carpet together, pausing for photos as a duo, holding hands and flirting. When asked for confirmation of their relationship, Munson answered, 'we're bros,' before winking and pulling Harrington close.

There's a TikTok video embedded below the article, showing the men being interviewed on the red carpet. Their arms are loosely around each others' waists, and when their eyes meet they catch and hang for a beat.

"So, longtime fans of both of yours are going feral online right now because of the rumors that you two used to hate each other. Is there any truth to that?" An off-camera voice asks.

The men laugh. "We've always been great friends," Eddie answers.

"Eddie thought I was stuck up," Steve giggles.

"I did not." Eddie slaps at Steve, who gives him an affectionate smile.

"Liar," Steve answers.

Eddie leans into the camera like he's telling a secret. "Harrington here was afraid of me."

"Fuck off, I was not." They wrestle around for a couple of seconds.

Steve shrugs Eddie off, straightening his suit jacket. "Okay, maybe I was a little intimidated back then, but then this morning you found a pretty rock and cried about it."

Eddie shrieks, swatting at Steve until someone in a black suit and name tag shoos them down the red carpet.

Eddie walks off first, so he misses Steve withdrawing a hand from his pocket and saying, "Still have the rock, though." He flashes the red, grey, blue striped stone at the camera.

His gaze drifts away, landing somewhere in the distance, hazel eyes soft and heart-wrenchingly fond.

after dealing with the tunnels, steve takes all the kids back to the byers house to wait for any news about will or el or the lab. he's finally crashing from the adrenaline rush, and the concussion is making itself known now full force.

he's pretty much dead to the world and collapsed on the couch. dustin and lucas are sticking close by, worried he's gonna just up and die on them when hopper finally makes it back.

steve is only hearing every other word when he finally gets jostled to sit up, and he feels rough hands on his face, trying to open his eyelid.

"look alive, harrington. you know where you are?"

steve grumbles, annoyed that he's being woken up like this, "yeah, yeah. i'm at the byers."

his head was gently placed back on the couch, "heard you got your bell rung by that hargrove prick."

steve sighed, deep and heavy, already feeling himself slipping away to dreamland, "better me than the kids. take a plate to the dome, any day. "

there was a snort somewhere in front of him and he felt a hand ruffle his hair, firm yet careful, "good boy, don't do it again."

it took a moment for the words to settle in his rattled brain, but as soon as hopper was walking away, steve was suddenly feeling very awake. a heat crept up his neck as a mortifying wave of arousal swam in his gut.

"good boy."

"good boy."

"good boy."

oh no.

--

years later, after starcourt and russians and dual confessions of being not-so-heterosexual, steve and robin became friends.

months after, when they sat around steve's empty mansion, drinking his dad's expensive liquor, robin had to ask, "how did you find out?"

"hmm?"

"how did you find out you were, y'know...whatever you are. swing for both teams and such?"

steve snorted, " 'and such' she says. i think we both need to be drunker for that conversation."

robin poked steve's side, "come oon, i told you my crush. throw me a bone here, steve-o."

he relented because, of course he would. he may have only known robin for less than a year, but it was scary just how much he was willing to show his true self to her so quickly.

"this stays in the room. you tell absolutely no one, or you'll wish you were sucked up by the giant flesh monster when you had the chance. "

she does some complicated hand sign to convey her loyalty and waits.

".........hopper said i was a good boy for protecting the kids, and i got a boner."

silence.

steve kept his eyes shut as the moment grew longer when he flinched at the slightest intake of breath from his best friend and prepared for the worst.

"man, the daddy issues run deep, huh?"

steve choked on saliva and hit her with a pillow, "THAT'S all you have to say!?"

robin was in tears, weakly defending herself against the pillow assault, "i'm sorry! mercy! it's just that it makes soooo much sense!"

steve didn't stop hitting her until they were both out of breath, laying next to each other and panting.

"i'm sorry your first man crush died."

steve hit her face with a pillow.

".......joyce is actually kind of hot so i get it--"

"SHUT UP!"

--

the very next year, after the murder of innocent teens, a manhunt, and the final battle won against the upside down, found steve sitting in eddie's lap.

after weeks of dancing around each other, cautiously flirting and yearning from afar, steve and eddie got their act together.

eddie dragged a hand up steve's neck and into his hair, his fingernails scraping softly against his scalp. it sent shivers down steve's spine, causing him to moan and let eddie slip through and suck on his tongue. steve bucked his hips up against eddie's in pleasure.

they separated, a string of saliva still attached to their lips that only broke when steve leaned forward and let his body sag completely onto eddie's. they stayed like that for a while, just listening to the other breathe, not wanting their little bubble to pop, and for reality to reach them.

eddie adjusted steve a bit, so he sat properly in his lap. steve, pliant and malleable, let it happen. it made eddie huff in amusement, nosing steve's temple and kissing his cheek, "you're such a good boy for me, aren't you."

steve immediately tensed and then let out a bark of laughter, "oh, thank god!"

eddie, rightfully confused, just blinked, "uhhh. mind sharing with the class what the fuck that was, harrington?"

steve just beamed, "i don't have daddy issues!"

"........WHAT?"

--

(after steve forced himself to explain his queer awakening, now embarrassed for speaking with no impulse control, eddie snickered uncontrollably into steve's chest. much to his chagrin.

once he calmed down, his smile turned devious and asked, "does this mean i'm gonna have to fight the chief for your affection? not sure i'm strong enough to do it, princess, i might have to forfeit."

steve struggled to suffocate him with a pillow, mostly because they were both laughing so hard.)