Classic

God I wish I was crab with knife, I bet crab with knife doesn’t have to deal with pornbots

hello gremlins i made a discord server because i want to make friends join it if you please

https://discord.gg/hVxYqUTj

you have been SNIFED, reblog to snif the next person

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

In the 22nd century, the word homeschooling was replaced with homosexualing. My mom ordered a teacher for me from an organ market and she told me, “Tomorrow you’ll be homosexualed,” and I was homosexualed for three years but Sauron only taught me Tic-Tac-Toe tricks.

Not a dream

This guy from uni hit me up and started hitting on me and he kept telling me that I have such an innocent look to me and look way younger and that he thought I was 19 tops (he is 23 and I am 25 actually) which immediately gave me a bad vibe, long story short he followed me on Insta and we kept chatting there and then he randomly attacked me about having a public IG profile and not being bothered about having 3k followers, most of which I don't know personally, and when I kept telling him it really wasn't a problem for me and that I like my followers and 3k wasn't that much to begin with, he hit me with a "you're way different than I thought," and said stuff like he guesses that I am not as innocent as he thought (wtf dude) and that he doesn't approve of the content I post ?????? and doesnt't see a point of the two of us talking anymore??? like, okay creep, I'd rather not be talking to you either and I was just being polite to you but insulting my followers who have never done anything wrong to you and have been nothing but nice, respectful and supportive to me??? Fuck off

not to mention that this is what he deemed to be my scandalous posts

At the age of 16 everyone gets teleported into a small room. In front of you is a table with all kinds of meals from apples to gourmet meats. Whatever you take a bite of will determine what superpower you’ll get. You are the first Person to take a bite of the table itself

as dumb as slime videos may be, they satisfy my childish desire to make potions out of all the makeup in my house