...no Exactly, And I Can't Do Anything But Stare As My Whole World Fall Apart. No One Can Help Me, And

...no exactly, and I can't do anything but stare as my whole world fall apart. No one can help me, and all I can do is stare blankly as the walls crashes down one after one. I am buried in my own thoughts, mind, and problems. I create even more problems in my head and it drives me crazy, it leaves me empty, non caring and on the edge of a breakdown all the fucking time.

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I'm a paradox. I want to be happy, but I think of things that make me sad. I'm lazy, yet I'm ambitious(naah...I'm just lazy I guess). I don't like myself, but I also love who I am. I say I don't care, but I really do(atleast I think I do). I crave attention, but reject it when it comes my way. I'm a conflicted contradiction. If I can't figure myself out, there's no way anyone else has...

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alreadylost...