* TALK DIRTY TO ME

Howl’s Moving Castle (2004) dir. Hayao Miyazaki

“I’m much happier at 53 than I was at 23.” (x)

୨♡୧

Kitty getting a massage

(via)

Rintaro Suna exercises his wrists every day to keep strong and hard hands capable of blocking any ball on the court. Fingers also have an important weight in blocking performance, and to exercise them he just needs your pretty wet pussy and a couple of pleas to make his long fingers move faster inside you.

No one would know his secret.

pink is a good color and that’s that

literally fucking sobbing and crying rn because of the lack of bertholdt writing on this site 💔 any headcanons w/ him would be greatly appreciated!! maybe some of the other aot boys too (sfw or nsfw i’ll take whateva)

♡ 𝐒𝐅𝐖 + 𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒 

♡ ft. eren, jean, connie, reiner, bertholdt

♡ warning: contains a bunch of random/silly shit and explicit content (mdni)!! edging, dacryphilia, knife play, anal, choking, hair pulling, unprotected sex/creampies, oral, masochism, face slapping

I JUST NEED TO SAY THANK YOU TO WHOEVER SENT ME THIS!! someone finally said it 😩 bertholdt needs more attention and im here to serve <3 i couldnt help but add the other boys and some nsfw … oops 🧍🏼‍♀️

BERTHOLDT

• always has this cute, kinda nervous half smile around everyone. but whenever he sees you, he gets this giant, adorably bright grin!!! it’s like he saves it just for your eyes <3

• sends you good morning and good night texts, along with random voice messages throughout the day

• the voice messages can be about the most random things, but they’re SO funny 😭

• one time you got an audio from him where he was whisper-yelling into the speaker, his voice all distressed

“i was at a stoplight with my windows down, playing music, and some old guy started waving and stuff, like dancing to it?? so i smiled at him and turned the volume up, BUT THEN I REALIZED HE WAS BLIND AND LOOKING FOR THE CROSSWALK—“

• sings to himself when he’s alone. it’s either about what he’s doing at the moment or just some random "la la la"-ing. does it quietly and with the softest voice ever. ANGELIC.

• he watches you get ready as if it’s the most interesting thing he’s ever seen. he stands at the bathroom door like 🧍🏻

• THIS IS HIM PLEASEEEE

• the more excited bertholdt gets about something he’s talking about, the more he “talks” with his hands. LOTS of arm gestures and body movement!! he might accidentally hit someone in the face with his elbow if they’re walking by LMAO

• holds open doors, pushes in your chair after you sit, and tries to never let you pay for anything. if you reach for your wallet at a restaurant, this man is nearly falling out of his seat trying to stop you. bertholdt tries to chill out because he doesn’t want to come off as overbearing, but he just wants to service you 😭

• carries ponytail elastics in his pocket or backpack in case you need one. he pulls them out at the most opportune moments like a magician 🪄

• when he hears something that confuses him, he'll stick out his bottom lip and it looks like he's pouting. he’s honestly just thinking really hard

• sits on the couch with a pillow in his lap or in his arms. it looks super cute ngl. this giant man hunched over a small throw pillow and just coddling it

• when you lean against his shoulder, he leans back

• cries over the sad ASPCA commercials </3 whenever the song “in the arms of an angel” starts playing, his eyes automatically tear up

• bertholdt is extremely cautious when making turns that expose your side of the car to oncoming traffic. he whips his head around at least 5 times to make sure no one is about to run a red light. he’s like 👀

• loves to give manicures for some reason! he’ll 100% paint your fingernails if you let him. it’s so relaxing to him!

• bertholdt just thinks your hands are really pretty 😌 not to mention they’re so small compared to his and he loves it seeing the size difference!! it makes him melt omg

• when you refuse to kiss him, he gives you these sad puppy dog eyes and bites his lip like a child would if they were in trouble. it’s the CUTEST most irresistible expression ever and he KNOWS it

• always instagramming his meals because he’s so enthusiastic about them. it might sound weird but it’s actually the most adorable thing ever whenever he does it!! he gets so excited

• snorts a little when he laughs really hard

• gets hot and bothered when you stand up for him. seeing you take the initiative like that — rare or not — just gets him going for some reason 😭

• a switch, but soft dom a lot of the time!! although, on some special occasions, he can get a little more carried away

• has the most lovely happy trail 🤤 it accentuates the sharp v-line of his hips, and he’s a little self-conscious about it — but seeing you kiss your way down it before giving him head helps him feel a bit better

• wants to try anal really bad but poor boy is super scared to ask, so he keeps it to himself :(

• gets stuck between two mindsets. he goes from “she is the most perfect person ive ever seen and i want to keep her happy and safe" to "she's such a dirty slut who deserves to be fucked nonstop and i need to see her cry pretty little tears”

• won’t tell you he has a crying kink though 🙄

• LOVES HAVING HIS CUM ON YOUR FACE. whenever you suck him off, bertholdt slips his dick from your mouth to coat your cheeks with his seed. he makes sure to swipe the tip of his cock against your face, making sure to spread his cum until it’s just a shiny film on your skin <3

• when bertholdt has a bad day or is extremely stressed — be careful when you tell him he can be rough with you, because you’re going to get more than you bargained for

• your smaller body is no match for him, so bertholdt can flip you into different positions with ease. he mounts you and pushes into your cunt violently, moaning at your cries and muffled whines, knowing that your stomach has to be bulging from the sheer size of his cock

• stuffs your cunt until his dick is completely swallowed up, pressed tightly against your cervix — watching you struggle to take it all sets bertholdt off. he feels so bad, so dirty for thinking that, but he can’t help it 💔

• his oral fixation is OFF THE CHARTS. when you let out pitiful cries and whines, bertholdt gently grabs your jaw and pushes two fingers into your mouth

• he loves watching your drool dribble down your chin and his knuckles; it keeps you from being too loud as he stretches you out, cock slipping inside of your warm, sloppy cunt and filling every last piece of space inside you

• mommy kink, but y’all already knew that.

• you’re just so hot and ready for him that he can’t resist abusing your pussy every once and awhile 😌

• the next day you’re like 👩‍🦽 where’s my handicap parking space

• when bertholdt subs, he’s an obedient sweetie pie!!

• literally the definition of a pretty drooly boy who will do just about anything for you without hesitation <3

EREN

• he waves at random people while driving just to see if they'll wave back. he insults them if they don't

• “fucking crusty bitch, that’s why your wife doesn’t love your baldheaded ass”

• uses his laptop keyboard as a plate for chips sometimes. he knows it’s bad and doesn't care 🙄

• he saw you paint your fingernails once and said it was pointless because the polish would chip off … but then you wake up the next day and catch him at the kitchen table like 💅🏻

• HE’S THE SPITTING IMAGE OF THIS WHEN HE GETS CAUGHT

• gets addicted to painting his nails black after that … the hypocrisy ✋

• when he’s leaving work or wherever he’s been, he texts you that he’s on his way home and asks if you need anything!!

• when you two sleep in the same bed, eren needs to be touching you in some way. if you try to scoot away from his grasp, he moans, moves over, and proceeds to cuddle you. literally can’t sleep without feeling you next to him

• NOT A MORNING PERSON

• if you try to wake him up, he mumbles “fight me” before pulling you back into bed. it always ends up in a wrestling match

• sends you hardcore porn and says “me and u <3”

• uses hello kitty bandaids. don’t ask

• gets overwhelmed with so much love and emotion for you sometimes and doesnt know how to handle it?? so he just… kinda thinks about you all day and imagines what your wedding would be like

• eren is actually a very kind and loving person — this man cares about the people around him beyond belief. he just makes so many sarcastic remarks and rude jokes that he comes across as a bitch 💀

• has a “good luck condom” in his wallet and refuses to take it out

• sends you super long texts of all of his random thoughts in the middle of the night for you to wake up to

• “just found out babies don’t have kneecaps wtf 💀 ok goodnight”

• “flushed away” is one of his favorite movies because he thinks the female rat is hot

• acts utterly surprised and amazed whenever he sees you naked. sometimes he pretends to faint for no reason 😐

• smiles with his eyes before his mouth. its so obvious when he’s about to give one of those giant smirks because his eyes crinkle at the corners a bit and they look so happy!!

• you turn him on so much one day that he makes a thirsty tumblr post about it. it gets like 5,000 reblogs from how nasty it is 👩🏼‍🦯

 • the first time you tried to ride him, eren orgasmed the second he bottomed out. you both just stared at each other in awe. the pussy was that good ig 😩 (he refused to try again for months out of embarrassment lmao)

• won’t sub very often, but when he does, he’s the biggest brat in the bedroom. pretty interesting to hear lots of teasing come from somebody who falls apart whenever you shove your fingers down his throat

• thinks that women should be edged and have multiple orgasms at least once a day. definitely wants to apply that belief to you

• daydreams of having you between his legs and slowly jerking him off <3

• maid costume kink. end of story.

• there’s nothing eren loves more than picking you up and bouncing you on his dick like a doll, right until you can’t form coherent words. seeing you get dumb from his cock … yeah, he’s weak at the knees

• though he can be soft sometimes, eren likes initiating sex with more aggressive movements — not feather-light or fleeting touches. it just doesn’t get the desperation of the situation across as well

• he wants to simply shove a hand up your shirt or down your pants, press his fingers into the flesh of your thighs and then grab at your cunt, more rough than typical sexual advances

• eren likes it when you rake your fingernails down his back, making him hiss between his teeth. and then, right after, he gives you the most predatory smile as he pounds into your cunt even harder

• because maybe if he keeps fucking you like this — forcing every last orgasm out of you — you'll dig your nails even deeper into his skin and properly feed into his masochism

• face slapping is also a secret indulgence of his. he doesn’t want to do it on you though; he wants it to be done on him 😳

• when eren starts getting rowdy, feel free to slap him across the face. it’s almost funny how quick it shuts him up. he just smiles at you after, satisfied and giddy, before calling you all sorts of derogatory names. slap him around as much as you want, because he loves it

• the sharp sting of pain paired with your pussy sucking in his cock — he’s in heaven

• in fact, eren just loves your pussy

• he can’t get enough of it. the way it rubs his cock — the inside of it velvety smooth, paired with the spongy texture of your g-spot — fuck, he loses his mind

• it grips the tip of his dick so nicely, stimulating the nerves there and making him toss his head back, leaving his jaw open and brain whirling

• honestly, if eren had less self-control, he’d be a drooling mess. he’s definitely pussy-whipped

JEAN

• his resting bitch face is constant. no doubt about it. i feel like it would kind of be funny though, like he looks so deadpan sometimes

• you tell him to stop looking at you like that and he’s like “🤨 this is my face”

• im sorry to say it but we all know this man has dry humor

• gets infuriated when he washes a spoon and the water splashes back on him. has to leave the room to calm himself down

• he got banned from tiktok after posting a video of connie falling off a hoverboard and busting his ass. he’s held a grudge against the app ever since

• can’t help but smile a tiny bit when you both make eye contact. he gets embarrassed though and whips his head away at the speed of light 🙄 you have to tell him to stop being a lil bitch

• runs away from lush employees at the mall so they don’t tell him what every soap does

• always says he understands why the grinch wanted to live alone with his dog 🧍🏼‍♀️

• jean likes it when you fix his bedhead — because his mullet can look like a nest when he wakes up — but pretends it annoys him, telling you to stop doting on him. still, when you look up at him and see the tiniest little quirk of his lips… you know he’s lyin ✋

• one time during the night, you stole all the bed sheets and left jean without any. when you woke up, this man was shivering with half of his body in a pillowcase LMAOO

• HE WAS LIKE

• poor guy wasn’t living, he was SURVIVING

• somehow knows your menstrual cycle better than you do. when you start, jean pulls up with the pads and tampons. you ask him how he knew and this man just shrugs, putting on that disinterested façade … truly an enigma

• HATES KAHOOT WITH A BURNING PASSION. the bright red screen after you get a question wrong fills him with rage. he doesn’t want the people behind him to think he’s a fucking idiot

• he’s one of the top students in his graduating class though, so 💅🏻

• a morning person. a lot of the time, he’ll be awake before you. he perks up a little when he notices your eyes open, and can’t help but let out a dramatic sigh. “there she is”

• has a tongue piercing 😏

• dislikes public displays of affection and prefers to do everything — besides hand holding — behind closed doors. sometimes he will steal a kiss from you in the store though because you’re just too irresistible!! your lips are one of his biggest weaknesses </3

• in private? jean is 100% a kiss fiend. he’s always finding reasons to peck you on the lips or jaw. not to mention how heated they tend to get… yeah, he’s also a make-out junkie

• jean might not seem like it, but he tends to get distracted when he’s doing a task he’s not interested in

• you’ll see him doing some online schoolwork, leave the room for ten minutes, and come back to him watching “top 10 unexplained ocean mysteries” on youtube

• CHEMISTRY IS BORING OKAY

• sends you pics of the grass when it’s super green because he thinks you’ll like it for some reason

• jean’s favorite way of cuddling is when he’s lying on his back with you right beside him, resting your head on his chest. one of his hands need to mess absentmindedly with your hair, and he always tangles your legs with his. don’t take them away because he will COMPLAIN

• jean got his tongue piercing without telling you — and you only realize it when he eats you out one day. it’s a wonderful surprise to say the least 💫

• whenever you offer him oral, jean rubs your face against his clothed cock before making you suck the head through the fabric, licking and pressing into it even harder until you're desperate to taste him

• and how can he say no? after all, his favorite thing is using your throat like a cocksleeve, like his personal little fleshlight

• jean tries not to push your head when you suck him off — he doesn’t want to gag you — but his cockhead feels so good when it touches the back of your throat, and he just has to experience that shock of pleasure again. so he uses a hand to push you down until your nose touches his pelvis. you can feel his dick so deep into your throat that tears start to drip down your face, and the image has him shaking

• if jean’s feeling a little nice, he’ll rest his heavy cock on your tongue while you fuck yourself with a dildo that's suctioned to the wall

• enjoys giving oral too; jean isn’t much of a people pleaser and doesn’t give a fuck what anyone thinks of him. but when it comes to you, your pleasure is one of the first things on his mind. so in order to treat you — and only you — eating your cunt is imperative to him <3

• not to mention that jean loves every aspect of it. he melts at the feeling of his tongue on your clit, circling and flicking against it, messing with the hood. he makes sure to absolutely abuse your sweet little bud, closing his lips around it and sucking until you’re close to cumming in just a few minutes. he lets one of his fingers do swirls inside your pussy the entire time, laughing breathily against your clit when you sob out his name and try to rock against his face

• not only does jean like cumming in you, but he likes cumming on you. your face, chest, stomach, thighs — wherever. but his favorite place is right on your pussy

• jean can’t explain it, but something is so hot about it: shooting his cum right against your cunt, not even trying to stuff his cock into your hole first — the thick strings dripping down your clit and sliding in between your folds, getting you all filthy

• he uses the head of his cock to smear the remnants around your opening, lubing it all up until it’s clenching around nothing but his cum

• jean gets hard again in like 2 seconds 💀

• okay, i know everyone depicts this man as a dom, but catch him on a good day and you might be able to change his mind

• not on purpose, of course SMH. jean will start out being on top and acting all tough, but when you manage to take control by pinning him down and grinding against him … oh, how the tables have turned 😈

• edge him and he becomes a rutting mess, panting like a bitch in heat as he moves his hips back and forth, humping his cock into your hand without a thought in his stupid, empty brain

• has a firm hold on your shoulders when you pry your fingers away from his dick, and he just whines in frustration

• the sound makes your pussy go 💢💢💢 DEADASS

• jean also likes having his hair pulled while he sucks on your tits. i mean, it’s long and grown-out for a reason, right? why not tug on it and get his cock a little harder?

REINER

• sweet, sweet man whose love language is physical touch

• tries not to be clingy, but he thrives on physical affection. always likes to have a hand on you. he’ll rest a palm on your leg when you’re watching a movie, or put an arm around you doing pretty much anything else. when walking in public, he likes to have a hand on your lower back or your fingers brushing against one another

• holds your hand while he’s driving. no idea if he even realizes it, but he rubs lil soothing circles onto your knuckles with his thumb

• okay, i know he’s tall and broad so he might not look it, but reiner is such a cuddle bug. he cant get enough of cuddling, EVER

• reiner likes to wipe away your "eye crusties"/“sleep crust” or whatever you prefer to call it. the first thing he does when you wake up in the morning is make you close your eyes so he can gently swipe both thumbs along the inner corners

• lowkey gets irritated if you wipe them away yourself 🧍🏼‍♀️

• one time he tried to get rid of a boner by thinking of two guys kissing but got harder instead

• when reiner was a kid, he was at a party with pieck, bertholdt, porco, and marcel. they were all playing truth or dare when porco dared him to go home. the cringy memory still haunts him

• mentions how scary being a baby must be because you can fall asleep in a crib and then wake up at walmart

• not an early bird or a night owl. he’s just in a permanent state of exhaustion 😁

• the side of his neck is extremely ticklish, and every time you kiss him there, he leans his head into it a bit with a smile because your breath is tickling him

• has the biggest soft spot for animals. don’t take him to the shelter with you because he’ll want to take every cat and dog home with him

• doesn’t laugh often. he usually chuckles softly or exhales a sharp puff of air through his nose whenever he finds something funny. but when he does laugh, OH MY GOD ITS PERFECT. LITERAL MAGIC TO THE EARS — it’s deep, a little rumbly, but still so musical. it could eradicate covid and end world hunger

• films stupid tiktok videos like this with you

• gets embarrassed buying condoms so he goes through self-checkout 😭

• sometimes pulls you into him and slow dances with you while you’re both alone in the house, humming a tune and swaying back and forth <3

• very insecure. not the person to be like “im gonna control you around other men/women because you’ll like them better than me” type of insecure, but more just like… he hates himself. so he doesn’t know how to take compliments :(

• whenever you call him perfect or handsome, reiner’s face flushes, and he gets a little awkward — he fidgets a little and struggles to look you in the face, but it’s so cute!! even though he doesn’t know how to accept it, his eyes are sparkling with SO MUCH LOVE and he wants to murmur thousands of thank yous

• lets you press your cold toes and hands against him to warm them up. if that’s not love idk what is

• always bites his lower lip to suppress his groans. it makes him look so pathetic and innocent

• whispers a soft “oh fuck" whenever he’s about to cum

• doesn’t dom all the time, but when he does, he’s so passionate about it. reiner is completely focused on getting you dripping wet to the point where he’s able to push inside you without any sort of resistance holding him back

• has an affinity for LOUD nasty sex. the type where all you can hear are moans and whines, the squelching of a dripping pussy being plowed into, and the bedframe hitting the wall. can’t get enough of it. the more perverted sounding, the better

• KNIFE PLAY KINK.

• loves to pin your arms above your head as he fucks you in missionary

• one of his worst fears is hurting you, so reiner won’t be rough in bed unless you ask for it. but if you do… LORD HAVE MURTHY 👵 👓 🤏

• he tosses you onto the bed, immediately crawling on top to give you a violent, bruising kiss. marks up every part of your body with hickies and swipes of his tongue. when you try to run a hand through his hair, he pushes it away and pins it down. it’s his “no touching” rule

• reiner is strong as hell, so he can manhandle you into any position without an issue. sometimes he’ll throw you around a little aggressively, but he always apologizes for it <3

• g-spot orgasms are hard to achieve, but reiner draws them from you so easily. his fingers actually make you cum faster than a vibrator would. it’s one of his talents ✨

• and the actual fucking? get ready, because that was just the foreplay 🥴

• this man pushes as deep inside as he can go and grinds your hips together as hard as possible. reiner doesn’t half-ass rough sex; he fucks you in earnest as you cry and whine, struggling to take him, but loving it so so much

• in doggy style, sometimes he’ll put a hand on the back of your neck to keep your head down, pressing your cheek into the mattress. once you’re a begging mess and close to cumming, he grabs you by the hair — with just the perfect amount of roughness — and cranes your head back to make you watch the way his cock pushes in and out of you

• it’s so funny though because he’s a man of duality. he can go from being rough to a brainless little fucktoy. his subby side? so soft and whiny and needy

• reiner has nipple piercings and they’re extremely sensitive. this makes nipple play secretly one of his favorite things

• he’s a little hesitant to admit that, considering the whole feminization of the kink … don’t judge him </3

• you have no idea how much he loves it when you run your tongue over them to feel the cold metal. his body literally shakes and he has to clench his fists to keep himself from writhing too much

• can cum from only his nipples being touched

• degradation kink!! god, reiner can hardly control himself when you call him your “stupid slut” or a “pathetic whore”

• it’s not well established, but reiner has lots of kinks. isayama told me

• reiner always keeps a bottle of advil on hand because sometimes he gets too carried away and your cervix hurts afterward LMAO

• poor guy feels SO bad, but don’t worry, you’re treated to plenty of kisses and orgasms to help with the pain <3

CONNIE

• NOT SUBTLE AT ALL. you can say “don’t look, but that guy over there—" and SWOOP, connie’s head flings back and he stares the person straight in the face

• THIS IS HIM

• it’s on purpose too 😐 he knows damn well it’s not necessary

• STICKS HIS FINGER IN YOUR MOUTH WHEN YOU YAWN JUST TO RUIN IT.

• has the best laugh!! it’s so contagious. but when connie thinks something is really funny?? he cackles like a witch. sometimes it sounds like he’s 2 milliseconds away from getting on a broom stick 🧙 ITS GOOFY

• sometimes he’ll pretend to drop an invisible pair of glasses, and then when he bends down to “pick them up,” he starts twerking

• “jinkies!!! i dropped my glasses… and this fat ass.”

• he also pulls his pants up to his ribcage and tucks his shirt in so he looks like an 80 year old man 👴

• eats handfuls of grated parmesan cheese and makes his animal crackers fight to decide which one will spared

• has at least 15 internet tabs open at all times. straight chaos. his laptop is begging for mercy

• bites you for no reason??? you could be doing homework or something and all of a sudden he’s sneaking in from behind and biting your shoulder

• devours salt and vinegar chips until his tongue hurts. you have to listen to him complain about it until his tastebuds heal

• EVERY TIME connie farts, he looks around like he’s scared and then does an impression of this girl word-for-word

• “did you guys hear that? 😟 im scared 😰 i don’t know what was that guys and i didn’t do that—” KNOWING DAMN WELL HE DID IT

• connie will bark out of nowhere and look at you like his heart is broken until you bark back

• a total lovebug … chaotic, but a lovebug nonetheless!!

• demands kisses all the time. says he thrives off them

• speaking of kisses, connie LOVES giving them!! whenever he gets home from work, he drops all his shit just to grab your cheeks in both of his hands and kiss every inch of your face <3

• always gives you his hoodies to wear. he just likes sharing, okay?? 🙄

• likes holding hands. likes holding hands. likes holding hands. likes holding ha—

• BELIEVE IT OR NOT… connie is a hard dom. HEAR ME OUT 😤

• yes, he’s funny, silly, and has the sense of humor of a baguette. but it makes that personality switch in the bedroom so much more alluring

• connie goes from acting like a total idiot to staring at you with this wicked lopsided grin, shoving you onto the bed and making a show of unlooping his belt

• it’s kinda mean too, because he unbuckles it slowly — just to make you think you have time to apologize for being a brat earlier

• but in reality? connie has already made up his mind. so don’t look confused when he whips his dick out and orders you to kneel at his feet, his tongue running along his front teeth and his dimples showing out of delight

• and connie is such a dick, because he’ll purposely provoke and tease you — waiting until you say something bratty

• his reason for doing so? he now has an excuse to shove your pretty little face up against the wall and force his fat cock into your drippy pussy, punishing your hole while groaning at your pathetic whines

• his movements are always sharp and hasty as he bends you over, pushing deep into you and pumping a good amount of his pre-cum into that perfect pussy — along with a thick load of his seed

• cums a whole bunch too <3

• makes you thank him afterwards 😌

• connie is just so dirty. he wants the nastiest things; wants his fingers wrapped around your neck as he slips into you, wants to watch your face screw up when you let out a strangled cry. wants to shove his fingers into your mouth when your jaw falls half-open during a particularly hard thrust. he wants to leave you bruised, wants you to climax so many times that your pussy is swollen and beat up

• also… edging king 💯 he likes to ruin your orgasms fr

• sometimes connie will stop sucking on your clit just to rest his cheek on your inner thigh and grin — or he stops fingering your pussy, only shrugging when you say you were about to cum. he doesn’t give a fuck. he’s in control of your pleasure, not you

• and it’s crazy, because once everything is said and done, connie is so much more… connie?? like he starts cracking sly jokes and the atmosphere is suddenly so much lighter

• ten minutes later he’s watching tiktoks and nearly pissing himself from laughing like??? pick a side dude, you gonna act tough or what 😭

source: cottagecore magazine

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