Eye Surgery For Pi!

in an interesting case of linguistic convergent evolution, the english words scale, scale, and scale are all false cognates of each other

Art vs real☺💜

i should not be allowed to make fake warning signs

FIRST REIADO FIC PUBLISHED ON PIXIV IN 2023 WE WON

havent drawn enstars at all this year but i'll be damned if i dont celebrate my boy's birthday!!!

[TL] PYSCHOBREAK/Chapter 3

[ This post uses Ois~su ♪ ]

Rei: Umu. I did some research regarding it, and I found that no one in RhythmLink requested that we take part in the experiment.

Koga: Huh? W-whaddya mean!?

Rei: I asked and it seems that it was a machine we spoke with. No real person knows about the experiment— that is the story they are sticking with.

It is unusual for myself to put on a serious face, but this time I feigned total ignorance…

It was rather bold of me, to tell a lie.

Kaoru: Yup. The higher ups thought we were behaving recklessly and were all up in arms about it.

Adonis: Umu. We were flooded with messages asking what HELLSING was.

Koga: I-I’m startin’ to feel kinda scared…

Guess I’m speakin’ with hindsight but we was probably too hasty ‘bout gettin’ involved with a questionable experiment.

Rei: So it seems… We realised we were losing popularity and tried to regain as much control as we could as quickly as we could.

And it all snowballed from there. In reality, I am as much of a fool as I thought I was— I must reflect on this.

Kaoru: You can reflect later, but first we need to focus on the problem at hand.

Rei 2: Eh? Where’s the problem?

Ain’t this turnin’ into a good thing for you guys?

Kaoru: Okay? Fake Rei-kun, can you shut it? We’re having an important conversation right now, alright?

Rei 2: Haha, someone’s in a bad mood~! If your lack of sleep is gettin’ to ya, why dontcha sleep with me, Kaoru-cha~n ♪

Kaoru: Wa, nononono….You’re just being creepy and gross now. Adonis-kun, you deal with him.

Adonis: I’d rather not either. Please don’t pass him to me.

…Despite his appearance, the fake Sakuma-senpai is nothing like him.

As things are now, fake me probably has a different personality too.

Adonis 2: ...

Rei 2: Our recall ain’t perfect yet, ‘n we still got a long way t’go. But hey, we’re still collectin’ data from you as we speak—

Sooner or later​, we’re gonna be so similar to you that even your parents won’t be able t’tell the difference.

Adonis: Is that your purpose?

Rei 2: You oughta be usin’ keigo, kohai. Even though we’re brand new, you still gotta pay respect to us.

Rei: I actually feel rather lonely when someone speaks to me in keigo. It's distant.

Rei 2: You’ve gotten soft, real me.

Well whatever. Becomin’ ‘real’ is instinct, but not our purpose.

We don’t have a sense of purpose.

Like I said earlier, we’re machines, wooden dolls, puppets. We ain’t got a heart, jus’ programmin’.

To feel, to think, to desire—

And dreamin’ too, is an annoyin’ flaw unique to you humans.

Rei: I believe that is what makes humans so fantastic.

We should move on. Questioning these fakes is not worth our time. Let us leave these machines behind and begin exploring the inside of the facilities.

Though it seems they have already disposed of any evidence, perhaps we can locate some documents here and there. Then we can discover why this has taken place.

And before you ask, I have already reported what we know so far to ES and the RhythmLink higher ups, and have been given permission to search the facilities.

Adonis: As always, Sakuma-senpai is fast at covering all his bases.

Rei: That’s one of my strong points. Of course, we are far from experts, and I don’t expect to find much–

But what else can we do in this moment?

Rei 2: Whilst you’re doin’ that, we’ll carry on with idol activities in your place.

Koga: Haa? Get over yourselves, you ain’t real.

The fans are confused ‘cos of you. They don’t wanna see fakes that only look like us from the outside, you bastards.

Rei 2: Confused? But from what I saw, there were a lot of really happy fans?

It’s pretty funny once you realise but–

When fans saw what HELLSING was up to, they was so happy, cryin’ too, goin’ “The real UNDEAD are back!”

Can you guys even afford a detour by checkin’ out the facility?

Whilst you’re worryin’ ‘bout things that don’t matter, we’re replacin’ you ♪

Koga: ...

[ ☆ ]

Chapter 2

[TL] Flashback/UNDEAD Climax Directory

(Visuals set to change)

Character(s): Rei Sakuma, Koga Oogami, Kaoru Hakaze, Adonis Otogari, Keito Hasumi, Tomoya Mashiro, 'Hajime Shino'

Description: Rei and the rest of UNDEAD are set to relive their past in a "certain experiment". Though, the events that lead to the formation of their unit seem to be different from what they can remember...

Read below!

BIOHAZARD/Prologue

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 1

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 2

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 3

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 4

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 5

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 6

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 7

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 8

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 9

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 10

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 11

BIOHAZARD/Chapter 12

PSYCHOBREAK/TBR

[TL] BIOHAZARD/Chapter 5

[ This post uses Ois~su ♪ ]

Time: That night

Location: In living quarters of the AIIE experiment grounds

Rei: Uwaa, we’re having a sleepover with all of UNDEAD~♪

Fufu. The SS preliminaries was the perfect opportunity for one, but Kaoru-kun was thrown into a desert and separated from us.

I’m happy that the four of us can have a sleepover together peacefully– gah!?

Koga: ...

Rei: Koga? Don’t throw an omanjuu at me? Is this your way of telling me you want to play?

Koga: Stop bein’ so happy-go-lucky, vampire bastard. The hell you mean, pajama party.

Rei: Oya, how nostalgic. Could this be that you want me to call you ‘wanko’ for the first time in a while?

Koga: I ain’t callin’ you that for nostalgia purposes, I’m insultin' you.

Rei: How troubling. Please don’t take your frustrations out on me.

We’ve all given our consent to take part in this experiment.

We can’t complain now, can we?

Koga: We was basically forced to? If it hadn’t been us, it woulda been like, Ra*bits who haven’t done nothin’ wrong.

Then we’d hafta live with the knowledge that them lot are now the victims whilst we watch from the sidelines.

It’s better for our own mental health to just do it for real, right?

‘Cos I don’t like this at all. Don’t forget that.

Kaoru: Ahaha. It’s definitely a little off putting and shady sounding, but it makes for an interesting story, right?

AI idols and stuff– no, technology and science in general has come a long way. Really, it’s like an old sci-fi movie.

If this was just a movie, or even just someone else’s problem, I think it could have been a lot of fun.

Adonis: I also don’t feel great about this but I am interested in terms of the development of science and technology.

This is the future we thought of when we learnt about Voc*loid and drawing AIs, and it’s becoming a reality right in front of our eyes.

We’re now living in a near sci-fi world that people from the past could only imagine.

It’s like a dream, whether that’s a good or a bad thing.

I’m excited.

Kaoru: Ahaha. That totally has the vibe of a boyish heroic novel.

I don’t particularly like that sort of thing either. At the end of the day, I’m still the son of an academic who reached for the sea in search of romance and mystery.

Adonis: I also dislike jumping into areas I don’t know about.

Rei: If we think realistically, if we had refused to take part, there was the likelihood of RhythmLink turning their backs on us.

I suspect they would be rather unpleasant in the matter.

This is a necessary step so we are not thrown to the side. The compensation is rather impressive, and, in simple terms, profitable for us.

Well, we made quite the sum of money during the SS, so we have some to spare.

If an experiment such as ‘AI idols’ is successful, implemented, and announced to the world, won’t they look to us as we were the test subjects? Doesn’t that make this all worth it?

Koga: But this doesn’t solve the problem we’re havin’. They’re just killin’ time, it literally has nothin’ t’do with our situation.

This better not turn into a goose chase, wastin’ time runnin’ ‘round lookin’ stupid.

Rei: Umu. We should all brainstorm some ideas in order to solve the root of the problem, as Koga said. Fortunately, we have been blessed with plenty of time to do so.

Kaoru: Mmm… I was kinda on guard when they said experiment, but if they’re just asking us to stay the night here?

Rei: Umu. We will be given medicine, which will cause us to sleep for about half a day. In that time, via the devices connected to our heads, data will be collected and compiled.

During the time we are not asleep, we will exercise to prevent our bodies from weakening, and eat to keep up our energy levels. Let’s all get on, the four of us.

The testing period will last approximately one week. During this time, any other forms of work are banned, as the extra stimulus may skew the results.

Our phones will be confiscated, and we will be separated from the outside world.

Kaoru: Kinda feels like being a prisoner or a hospital patient… Welp, this’ll be easy money if all we’ve got to do is laze around.

Rei: Umu. I suppose we can take it easy. We will be paid regardless as to whether the experiment produces useful results or not, so it’s not a complete waste of time.

Fortunately, this location is better than a hospital or a prison.

Look, there are some cards and board games we can use to kill time. Let’s play until it’s time for us to sleep.

Koga: Ain’t you bein’ too relaxed ‘bout this whole thing?

Rei: That’s a good thing, is it not? I’ve been acting unusually mature since my youth, so I do not have many experiences like this. Such as having a sleepover with friends of the same age—

That’s why. I can’t be sure of the future, but I know I am very happy right now ♪

[ ☆ ]

Chapter 4

1850s Tumblr Dashboard Simulator

👸🏻 girlbossladyjane Follow

It really makes me sick to see people giving money to penny weeklies when Franklin's expedition STILL has not been found 😭 There are good men out there trapped in unimaginable temperatures and literally all that's needed is a little more funding for another rescue mission yet all you guys seem to care about are your vulgar little stories...

🧔🏻‍♂️ queerqueg Follow

the franklin expedition is dead as hell

👸🏻 girlbossladyjane Follow

Disgraceful thing to say but I'd expect nothing more from a M*lville fan

10,558 notes

👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 hartgrindisreal

Sorry for posting so much about Tom Gradgrind/James Harthouse from Hard Times lately. It turns out that I was getting arsenic poisoning from my wallpaper? Anyway I took a seaside stroll and I'm normal now. Check your walls y'all

#whyyy did i assume they were committing unlawful actions together like where did i even get that from lol #hard times isn't even that good by dickens standards tbh

659 notes

🎨 asherbrowndurand

Just painted this

2 notes

ss-arctic-girlie-deactivated18540927

RIP Napoleon... you may have been unable to conquer Alexander's Russia but you sure as hell conquered Alexander's bed

🖼️ preraphaelitebro Follow

HERITAGE POST

📝 shakespearesforehead Follow

How does this have less than 100k notes you could literally not avoid this post back in the 20s lol

82,170 notes

🌄 loyalromantic Follow

poets just aren't dying young in mysterious water-related incidents like they used to :/

#as useless and degenerative as i find 'the living poets' and i'm glad we're finally moving on from them #i have to agree with op in this respect

6,884 notes

🎀 thefopdiaries Follow

I finally got a daguerreotype of myself ^_^ Porcelain urn for scaling

📜 bartlebi-thescrivener

i think i hauve consumption

112 notes

🐋 whaler4life

They found oil in the ground??? WTF. THIS IS LITERALLY THE WORSTTTT. FUCK MY LIFE FOR REAL THIS TIME

11 notes

🌿 naturesnaturalist Follow

I swear this website has 0 reading comprehension skills. Darwin NEVER claimed we "evolved" from apes like if one of you guys actually bothered to open his new book you'll see all his arguments are backed up by evidence. He actually makes a lot of sense

#sure there's nuance like i don't fully agree with all of it #but his general theory of natural selection seems pretty sound imo

56 notes

🤵🏻‍♂️ byronicherotournament Follow

🙈 butchbronte Follow

Of course these are the finalists lmao this website is so predictable. Anyway vote Heathcliff if you dont i'm going to assume you're a phrenologist

📖 sapphichelenburns Follow

It's not problematic to acknowledge the fact that Heathcliff was a brute like he literally killed dogs in case you forgot. #rochestersweep

🙈 butchbronte Follow

I love the implication here that Rochester never did anything cruel either. He literally locked his wife in the attic and lied to Jane about it 😭 like that was a pretty significant thing that happened

📖 sapphichelenburns Follow

And? God forbid women do anything

#why'd you have to pit two bad bitches against each other #anyway i'm not attracted to men but still went with rochester #bc in terms of living quarters thornfield hall > wuthering heights easily

8,027 notes

👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 hartgrindisreal

Not the Russian tsar dying immediately after hartgrind became canon

#i know dickens hasn't technically confirmed it yet but like. SOMETHING was strongly implied ok #see: my previous post #dickensposting

522 notes

👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 hartgrindisreal

LORD HELP ME. THE BODY LANGUAGE. THE WAY THEY'RE LOOKING AT EACH OTHER. AHHHHHH

#this installment!!! im-- #dickensposting #i can't fucking cope #dickens wants to KILL us he wants us DEAD....

2,309 notes

⭐️ newamerican

Hi guys sorry I haven't been posting lately it's been so difficult getting to California 💀 I'm finally here now though just need to find a pickaxe and soon I'll be digging! :-) wish me luck lol

#gold #gold rush #gold rush grind #california #adventure

0 notes

i love the scene of adonis noticing that rei was depressed post-crossroads and all the discussions of adonis being particularly clever / observant throughout the story... it really hammers home the adonis and rei parallels. both emotionally intelligent people who feel othered and who are driven by their love for humans and desire to help even strangers to the point of self sacrifice. the major differences between them are caused by adonis' crippling self esteem (which is something he's slowly but surely learning to improve) and rei being treated like a god (something that's also changing as rei allows himself to be fallible)