I Want To Be Someone’s Favourite PLEASE

i kiss you on the mouth and end my turn

the framing of "we can tell early humans had compassion because we've found skeletons of disabled people who made it to old age" kind of boils my piss a little bit because it kind of fundamentally assumes that compassion is the only possible reason to live in community with disabled people. and idk about you but I don't like the direction that logic tends to lead people

You guys are so sweet to me when I’m dysphoric and it’s really cute when you’re like “I’ll always see you as a boy” “you’re the cutest boy don’t worry <3” but I really need someone to crack me in the jaw and call me a faggot

Like rough and violent affirmation honestly. Tell me I sound so stupid calling myself a girl and then shove my face into the dirt when you fuck me idk

i love like, pseudosex

erotic vampire bites, magic ritual that feels Very Good to participants, multi-person fusion, mind-meld, sexy mitosis, consensual mindfuck, love-hivemind, being tfed into something or other, that sort of stuff

its hot

pushing people away just because i want them to chase and make me feel wanted.

wanting to feel good and everything around you being bad is exhausting

anyway

i cannot fucking deal with you anymore lol i feel like such an afterthought in your life and you're practically in the center of mine

“do you want to talk about it?”

no, i want to kill myself because of it.

I hate that there's no way to be disabled that people will accept.

If you show joy, or acceptance in your disability, you're not really disabled and no one will take you seriously when you do complain and well it can't be that bad and oh I'm sure you're used to it.

But if you're miserable then you're whiny and annoying and people hate that it's "all you talk about" and its always ugh you're always tired and can we please stop talking about this it's making me depressed and oh I'd kill myself if that happen to me.

If you're happy you have everything figured out and don't need help anyway but if you're miserable you're a whiny bitch that can't just suck it up. There's no winning