Andrew Is So Real For Thinking Neil Is A Hallucination Cos Now That We Have Outsider Pov On Him It's

happy birthday neil josten and his little fox paw doodles and his fraying-at-the-hems shirts and his scary ahh smile and his electric blue bambi eyes and his unsettling demeanour and his inability to half-ass anything except for school and his fearlessness and ruthlessness and his love for maths of ALL fucking things and his zombie cowboy halloween costume and his bad temper and his smart mouth that only knows how to talk mad shit, lie, and kiss andrew and his pretty face and his four minute mile and his favourite colour being grey and his five-something languages that he speaks and his fierce devotion to exy and the foxes and jean and his insane aura and his general nonchalance and his breakfast burrito that he hid behind and his napkin that he ordered a hit on and his stalker binder and his keys and cigarettes. i will never love another the character the way i love neil josten.

The whole "house husband Percy" agenda the percabeth fans are pushing disturbs me so much. You have no idea.

1. Is Percy not allowed to have ambitions and dreams of his own? Annabeth has her architecture. Let Percy have his environmentalism, and 'saving the sealife' hobbies that who knows-could potentially turn into a job with the right connections.

2. It's pushed by the same crowd that refuses to acknowledge that Percy is smart, let alone that he's canonically smarter than Annabeth. The same crowd that thinks he's a seaweed brain (aka stupid), and needs Annabeth to be the brains for him. It gives the impression that accomplishing anything in the mortal world is too much for Percy - he's incapable of it, he should just stay at home and do the house cleaning/child rearing and let Annabeth do all the higher thinking.

3. It also follow the dangerous trend of Annabeth's abusive tendencies in isolating Percy from his friends/family. She's already isolated him from Jason, Reyna and Rachel - the last via emotional manipulation (actively making him uncomfortable to even mention her). Imagine a life where Percy stays at home most of the time - only with Annabeth. She brings in all the money, and therefore has even more control over him. Any money he needs to see friends - bus/plane tickets, money for a vehicle/gas etc. he has to ask her permission for it. In the world we live in, money is everything. Can't do anything without it. Annabeth will have all of it, and Percy would be completely dependent on her. He wouldn't even be able to get a phone or laptop to communicate with them without asking for Annabeth's money and permission.

This is not to say that all marriage where one member is a stay at home spouse is controlling and abusive. That isn't the case. But in HoO, Annabeth has shown alarming abusive and controlling tendencies - both in controlling Percy's social life and restricting his autonomy and powers. Giving Annabeth financial control of his life would be disastrous and perfect grounds for her existing abusive tendencies to become far worse.

i think grover pointing out to percy that annabeth's yankee's cap is the only thing she has of her godly parent makes percy realize how important it is for demigods to have symbols of their parents with them. and i would really love to see it all come full circle when percy battles with ares later on in season one, and after he wins, he demands that ares leave them alone so they can return the bolt and that he gives clarisse another spear to make up for the one he broke. which would be an amazing way to set up percy and clarisse's 'i have a lot of respect for you/you're an annoying bitch that i tolerate/if anyone messes with you, i'll cut them' trope for later seasons.

crazy to me how much everyone loves being loved by kevin.

he asked neil ONCE if he wanted to talk about riko, and neil 'felt it like a balm to every bruised inch of his skin'. he has it in him to care so much and the foxes don't realize it 'cause his default setting is bougee bitch. but then he cares, and it shows, and they go 'oh wow. this feels awesome. kevin day cares about me.' like no wonder jean moreau was so down bad and defensive of him it's giving "imagine being loved by me" from hozier's talk

The way Neil Josten switched into Nathaniel in order to process and handle the abuse and trauma of being found by his father's people and the reality of his looming death will never not fuck me up, he literally said I can't handle this but maybe the Butcher's son could. And then. And then!! The way those two versions of himself coalesce into Neil Abram Josten (legally recognised) after Nathan is dead and the truth is out? The Neil Josten we see in The Sunshine Court has all of the attachments of Neil Josten, the slow unraveling of family and care but all of the hard edges of Nathaniel, unflinching from the reality of the world he lives in and the decisions he has to make to keep his life. Nathaniel would never have stuck around long enough to care about Jean Moreau and call a hit out on his abuser. Neil would never have trusted those resources available to him (or potentially the trail it could leave) in order to deal with the problem in one brutal but efficient move. But Neil Abram Josten reforged could, would and did.

You just don't get him like I do.

Wymack pulled a bottle of vodka out of the bag and put it down beside Kevin. “You have ten seconds to inhale as much of this as you can. I’m timing you. Go.” It was alarming how much a man could drink when he needed an emotional crutch. Wymack had to pry the bottle from Kevin’s desperate fingers afterward.

Kevin was silent for an endless minute, then said, “You should be  Court.” It was barely a whisper, but it cut Neil to the bone. It was a resentful goodbye to the bright future Kevin had wanted for Neil. Kevin recruited Neil because he believed in  Neil’s potential. He brought him to the Foxes intending to make a star athlete out of him. Despite his condescending attitude and his dismissals of Neil’s best efforts Kevin honestly expected Neil to make the national team after graduation.

“Good thing you’re not there anymore.” “Jean still is.”

“Let Riko be King,” Kevin said, with the exaggerated enunciation of the thoroughly sloshed. “Most coveted, most protected. He’ll sacrifice every piece he has to protect his throne. Whatever. Me?” Kevin gestured again, meaning to indicate himself but too drunk to get his hand higher than his waist. “I’m going to be the deadliest piece on the board.”

Before he stepped on Kevin tapped the butt of his racquet against the floor and passed his stick to his other hand. He stroked to half-court head high and left-handed and the crowd went wild.  

about to cry bc this lyric reminds me so much of the twins:

"Little Andy soft in your newborn skin,

Only one little Andy will you return again?

I believe we can renew,

and you could be my brother again"

like don't think about aaron thinking this about andrew ://// aaron and andrew love each other so much ik it in my heart of hearts

This fucking sucks I’m going to [ remembers suicide jokes are bad for your mental health ] find glendower

I hate how the booktokification of the “unhinged woman” genre has completely reduced the concept of female rage to just “girlboss” without taking seriously how important it is to unequivocally portray female rage.

Throughout the history of literature, we’ve been given countless instances of women in despair and in sadness but save for a few writers (take Euripides, for example), we’ve rarely ever been given angry women who aren’t the villains or the foil for the perfect poised passive princess. Female rage has constantly been subdued and erased or warped into “she’s just batshit crazy” in pretty much every society.

And now that publishing and media marketing has reduced women showing rage in books to the “white hypersexual girlboss with a knife”, instead of uplifting the way women are allowed to have more dimension and sympathy in their visible anger than ever in literature, the media still isn’t taking this subgenre seriously.