Teenage Liu Qingge Time Travels To The Future. Let’s Say The Abyss Years (TM), As Any Good LiuShen

SV AU where Shen Qingqiu manages to convey to Luo Binghe, before sending him into the Abyss, that he's not rejecting Binghe it's just that his Heavenly Demon heritage means that he absolutely MUST go into the Abyss and do something (not particularly defined) because Binghe is the only person who could possibly do it and it is related to his destiny and the fate of the whole entire world, somehow.

So naturally Luo Binghe takes this to mean that there is an Extremely Important Mission that he must accomplish in the Abyss, and that he can't come back until he figures out what it is and does it.

It can't just be Binghe's own trial-by-fire training, because how could that be important to the fate of the rest of the world? (Binghe does not know he is the protagonist of a novel.) So it also can't just be making it to Xin Mo and then getting back out again, even though leaving and going home is what Binghe personally desires most, because how could there be any purpose to him going if he just rushes through and does nothing except try to leave?

End result: Binghe takes longer to leave the Abyss because he concludes that his reason for being there is to end the eternal suffering of its inhabitants by changing the nature of the domain to be less rampantly hostile. Which, it turns out, is harder than just escaping.

Genuinely don't know what it's called but there's a particular way of violating reality that doesn't work. For example, I am willing to accept an omegaverse university AU of nearly any fandom you care to name (except, for some reason, Sherlock, because I have an inexplicable hatred for unilock). However, a lot of Star Wars university AUs specifically fail on this aspect: they make Anakin an engineering PhD student and Obi-Wan something like literature or classics, and then they make Anakin his TA or GA.

You can't do that. Absolutely not. Anakin is unqualified for that and a university would not do it in any case. A university would literally hire a junior or senior undergraduate workstudy student to do as much of that work as possible first. They would do NOTHING other than do that and make the prof do all his own grading.

Is there a name for "I will accept [wild fantasy premise] but not [ordinary wrong thing]?" Please tell me there's a name for this. Probably someone who studies lit will know? I'm a systems person I don't know from lit theory just like Anakin

tomarry fic where post-war, harry keeps traveling back in time to kill voldemort early and prevent everything bad from happening. but he can't do it so he decides to come back and do it when riddles older but he just keeps making excuses every time.

harry, stepping into wool's orphanage: i- god, he's just a baby, i can't kill him, what's wrong with me? i'll come back when he's older

harry, stepping back into wool's orphanage: he's just a kid, i can't do this- he's about to get his hogwarts letter! and he's so small and cute and- okay. another time.

harry, stepping into hogwarts: he's...weirdly attractive. fuck. i'll kill him when he gets ugly.

harry, stepping into borgin & burkes: HE'S EVEN MORE ATTRACTIVE, GODDAMNIT-

riddle, seeing the same man have a breakdown in front of him multiple times throughout his life before disappearing and reappearing looking exactly the same despite years having passed: WHAT IS HAPPENING

Dark Lord and The Master of Death Harry Potter

binggeyuan modern!AU based on this prompt where shen yuan and luo binghe live in the same apartment building, but have never met each other. SY is more-or-less his regular shut-in self, and keeps very odd hours, which means that he happens to be wide awake the first time LBH gets back to the apartment building at 3 a.m. after some manner of illicit activity and realizes he doesn't have his fucking entrance key. LBH hits one apartment number after another into the intercom, fully prepared to dazzle his way into getting one of them to open the door for him, but the intercom is old, and people come and go from this building often enough that most people don't bother getting it set up, and he's having no luck.

finally, just as he's about to give up and bully his way onto mobei-jun or sha hualing's couch for the night, someone picks up. he doesn't even remember which specific apartment number it was, he was just entering them mechanically. immediately, LBH pulls on his smoothest affect (sure the intercom has no video, only shitty, garbled audio, but that's no reason to let the universe catch you slipping) and prepares to give the sob story performance of his life. before he can even get a single word out, however, there's a crackly, almost indiscernible "Open!" and he hears the click of the entrance door unlocking before the intercom call is ended. he stares at the intercom for a minute, somewhat wrong-footed, but then shakes himself out of it in time to catch the door before it locks again.

SY, for his part, was broken out of a binge-reading spiral by the intercom call, and fully did not realize how late it had gotten. he assumed he had ordered something that was arriving earlier than expected, and kept an ear out for a knock on his front door from the delivery person for a few minutes, but then got sucked back into the target of his current literary criticism.

the next time LBH gets locked out, he starts in the general number range he remembers striking on the last time, and pays closer attention to the numbers this time. he's curious if his little philanthropist will be so accommodating again. SY orders a lot of packages, okay! the one time he didn't pick up the intercom he had to wait an extra three days for his ultra-rare, limited edition merch, which he will not be going through again. this time, though, when the intercom picks up, LBH is prepared. he starts talking immediately, playing up his stress at being locked out, how sorry he is to be a bother, and how much he really, really appreciates it. SY fully blue screens at this unanticipated display of emotions, blurts something out about how it's not problem and of course he's happy to help out a neighbor in need, then hangs up (after unlocking the entrance, of course). it is perhaps fortunate that the intercom has no video, and thus he can not see the look on LBH's face.

LBH gets more and more consistent pushy with his calls, curious how far this little philanthropist will go for him. he knows his apartment number, of course, he could just knock and introduce himself, but he'd rather let him come to him. LBH starts interjecting little questions here and there, trying to glean any information about his mysterious benefactor. SY, meanwhile, is lighting a daily candle for this poor little bun somewhere in his building, who has truly the worst luck in the entire world! who ever heard of a gang of pickpockets stealing someone's keys not once, but twice in the same week!

LBH gets comfortable with the state of things — as ever, too comfortable. nothing good can last forever. one night, after a long and utterly shitty day, for the first time in ages, he loses his key for real. he's tried to avoid reaching out to SY at any time when he's not 100% in control of himself, but there's nothing for it. he punches in the numbers for the unit he knows by heart at this point, and when it picks up, he sighs tiredly, and waits for SY to speak first. after a moment of silence, the call drops, and the door remains locked. LBH is almost shaken entirely out of his malaise. not even a word? he puts SY's apartment number in again, but this time it doesn't even pick up. he stares at the intercom in unpleasant shock for a few minutes, then punches the wall next to it and leaves. he spends the night on mobei-jun's uncomfortably small couch, staring unseeing at the ceiling above him. at least the other man doesn't ask him any questions.

their easy rapport broken, SY starts to worry when he hasn't heard from his unfortunate little neighbor — maybe he's moved out? hopefully to a place with a more accommodating security system... after a full week, his worry ramps up even higher. he wants to believe his neighbor just found a system to keep track of his keys that works for him, but statistically, it seems unlikely. feeling like the most awkward, overstepping idiot on the planet, he scribbles off a few short notes, and sticks one by the the intercom, one by the mailboxes, and one in the laundry room. his neighbor will have to go at least one of those places, certainly?

to my keyless neighbor - hope you're well! i was worried- if you ever need me, you know where to reach me. you weren't a bother- - XX4

the next time LBH stops by the apartment (he's been avoiding it by couch-hopping as much as possible, to the great aggravation of his friends) he carefully avoids looking at the intercom. as such, it's actually sha hualing who spots the note first. (she bullied her way into an invite to make LBH actually go home.) she crows out a harsh laugh, snatching the note off the wall and holding it up dramatically, cackling about "rom-com shit". LBH isn't really paying attention, until he catches a glimpse of the apartment number at the bottom. eyes flashing, he snatches the note out of her hand, and reads it over once, and then again. after a moment, he turns to sha hualing, and tells her to go home, that he's got plans, actually. she gapes at him for a moment, then scoffs and turns on her heel, flipping him off as she goes. whatever! she didn't want to babysit his mopey ass any longer anyway!

LBH spends a few frozen moments running over his options, torn between calling right now just to see if his philanthropist will pick up this time, and giving himself a chance to freshen up, and maybe make a good enough showing for himself that whatever it was that caused him to be ignored before will never happen again. ultimately, he decides on the latter, but rushes through all his preparations as much as he can while maintaining sufficient attention to detail. he wishes he had the materials to make something truly spectacular, but his apartment is showing his absence over the past week. he settles on a meal that just barely feels sufficient, and finds himself more anxious than he can remember being in years at this point, staring at his philanthropist's apartment door, two levels below his.

he raises his fist to knock, tentatively at first, too quiet to hear, and then once more, louder. a muffled voice comes through the door, and a few moments later, it cracks open to reveal a man just a bit shorter than him, with a rumpled shirt that looks like it has just been haphazardly thrown on and hair that might not have been brushed in days. he's... really cute.

LBH and SY just kind of stare at each other, frozen, for a bit, until LBH proffers the food he's brought, and SY's archaic etiquette subroutines kick in, and he invites LBH in before he can even think about. his immediate wince makes it clear he had not meant to do that, but LBH is not above making a situation work to his advantage, and graciously accepts, stepping into the somewhat cluttered apartment before SY can recover from his slip-up. they still have not exchanged names.

ultimately, they get themselves figured out. LBH introduces himself, and SY follows suit. there's a beat of silence as they both realize that this does not actually clear up anything about how they know each other. LBH finds the words to explain his own part in this are slow to come, so he finally just hands the note, neatly folded, to SY. SY's face colors, but he overcomes it to fussily poke at LBH about how worried he was, when the other just disappeared! LBH stops for a second, hearing that, then slowly responds that it was SY who cut him off first. SY gapes at him, then demands to know when he did a thing like that! he set his intercom call sound to caramelldansen and max volume so he'd be sure not to miss it!

LBH gives him the date, and SY flushes again, then looks away, muttering something unflattering about a "qingge". LBH feels a wash of jealousy, that he's misread the situation and SY is already spoken for, but SY goes on to explain that he had been stuck overnight at the hospital - for nothing major! pretty routine actually! - and the friend that was staying with him must have picked up, then hung up when he couldn't figure out who was calling.

LBH sits back, somewhat at a loss. so it... wasn't because SY was tired of him? SY sputters, waving his hands about. absolutely not! he might be slightly forgetful, but binghe is clearly a wonderful young man and it's not like SY has much else going on in his life!

LBH determines to himself then and there that the only way to ensure such a thing does not happen again is to make sure that he is the one staying with SY the next time he's in the hospital.

The Snape Family - 1970

sharing a very sage bit of advice from The Simpsons' own John Swartzwelder that i've been trying to hamper down in my writing and drawing alike. let your inner crappy little elf do his worst

Advertising peaked at the Discovery channel “Boom de Yada” commercials

AU where, after dying in PIDW, Yue Qingyuan wakes up in the past when Luo Binghe is still just 14… and of course, he immediately goes to kill him.

Unfortunately, he still has his protagonist halo, so something interferes, and YQY ends up being confronted by the other peak lords about why he suddenly decided to try and murder a random Qing Jing disciple. Now, YQY can’t just say that he’s a demon, because he’s not sure what methods will work to reveal that, since he doesn’t know how LBH hid his his heritage the first time around — so he comes up with excuses, ones that he hopes will at least get LBH out of the sect before he becomes too powerful. He’s a poor cultivator, he always gets into fights, the other disciples always accuse him of stealing things and he doesn’t get along with them, so they should just throw him out of the sect —

What he forgets to account for is the fact that Shen Jiu is there, listening to all of this, and hearing YQY list off all the traits he sees LBH as sharing with his younger self as reasons he doesn’t belong at the sect. He knew YQY didn’t care that much about him, not after he’d abandoned him when they were children but… it still hurts to hear it spoken about so explicitly. If YQY didn’t owe him a debt for saving his life, would he be saying the same words about SJ?

So, SJ stands up to defend LBH. Sure, he might have been silently hoping the kid would quit or get himself killed, but SJ is nothing if not spiteful, and YQY? He just made things personal. LBH is his disciple, not YQY’s and by the time SJ is done with him, he’ll be fit to be his successor.

YQY is now faced with an impossible situation — use his authority as sect leader to go against SJs wishes and get rid of his future torturer… or wait and see what happens. Surely he’ll get bored of Luo Binghe eventually and start hating him again… right?