°•☆ 14/08/24 ☆•°

Cat

How to "make space" for your feelings:

- expect them to be there rather than minimizing them or pretending you're not feeling anything. Expect yourself to have emotions and feelings and reactions. Admit to yourself when you are hurt, admit to yourself when you are sad, angry, heartbroken. You're a human being! You are allowed to have feelings! Even AI bots have feelings these days!! So why can't you???

- talk it out in a safe space. Even if you have to say it out loud to yourself by yourself. Saying it out loud not only makes it real but it also helps us process in a different way, because now you have proof and evidence of the things that are bothering you.

- notice when you're dismissing yourself ("this is dumb, I shouldn't feel that way.") and say this instead: "you belong here." All of your emotions have a purpose. They're trying to tell you something. For instance, feeling jealous tells us when we're feeling left out, less than, competitive with others, insecure about our own worth, and probably telling you a past wound that is still open & needing your attention. By allowing yourself to acknowledge this jealous feeling exists, you can pinpoint the exact reason and bring it out for your own introspection & attention. But you can't do this if youre stuck telling yourself you're a bad person for feeling this way, or too unaware of yourself to even notice that jealousy is what you're feeling in the first place. That is why step one is to expect yourself to have feelings and reactions in the first place, so you can talk about them and move them in safer & healthier ways.

- Drop the need for perfectionism & expect this to be a process. You're not gonna be able to change this overnight, so don't expect yourself to. All of your emotions are welcomed here, even and especially the negative ones, even and especially when you inevitably make mistakes, even and especially if you're self hating and persecuting. Has telling yourself to "stop feeling this way" ever worked? So why the hell are we still trying that method?

- yes, that even means your thoughts and feelings of wanting to unalive yourself. You've been through hard things and you're carrying that load all by yourself. It makes sense that this is how you feel. In a world that keeps us down, you've got to learn to accept all of you exactly as you are. Your unaliving feelings belong here too. They're telling you something, they're telling you you've had enough and that something needs to change because it's literally zapped your life force.

- notice your thinking patterns. Are you beating yourself up all the time? Are you avoiding something? Is there a deeper reason? Yes, it is that deep. This is your life after all. Why live if it's not about you? Is there any way you can make this easier on yourself?

- Establish yourself a safety zone & network to unmask and ask for help & reassurance. "Making space" means to expect & allow yourself to be vulnerable. You still get to choose how, where, when, & with whom you want to be vulnerable with. You can do this by first finding spaces that make space for you. Therapy & online venting spaces are a great place to start.

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Hope this helps ❤️‍🩹

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please make sure that wherever you’re at in life, you don’t treat it like a transitory period. don’t waste your college years wishing to already be graduated & have a job. don’t waste your single years wishing for someone to be in love with. if/when those things come, they will come in due time and they will be good. but there is nothing like looking back and feeling empty because you wasted literal years ignoring what you had because you were hoping for something better. while it’s important to better yourself and reach for your goals, don’t neglect the present because that’s where you are now and it’s your now that determines your future. 

nosferatu

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*forgets to message back* *forgets to check notifications* *forgets to look through bookmarks* *forgets to check reminders* *forgets to check out [insert content] that i said i would* *forgets to take my phone off do not disturb* *forgets to

i like working at plant store. sometimes you ring up someone and there's a slug on their plant and so you're like "Oh haha you've got a friend there let me get that for you" and you put the slug on your hand for safekeeping but then its really busy and you dont have time to take the slug outside before the next customer in line so you just have a slug chilling on your hand for 15 minutes. really makes you feel at peace with nature. also it means sometimes i get to say my favorite line which is "would you like this free slug with your purchase"

All this news about the birth rate falling, am I supposed to be worried? I'm joyous. I hope it falls faster.