Latest Posts by sublimedetectivemusic - Page 2

the way hozier titles a song "i, carrion (icarian)" where he sings about the self-destructive idea of sacrificing himself by flying into sun to save his relationship, and compares himself to 'carrion', the decaying flesh of animals, often a word used for roadkill. to then go and write a song called "abstract (psychopomp)" about how holding an animal whilst it dies mirrors the mercy of ending a failing relationship, similar to a 'psychopomp' - a deliverer of death. and we watch as hozier turns from 'icarian' to 'psychopomp' when he realises that prolonging suffering is crueler than just letting love die. i'm both in awe and crying on my bedroom floor.

and the way a carrion crow is also a symbol of death ?? and how 'carrion' sounds like 'carry on' the way icarus kept going ?? and how he sounds envious of his lover's courage in "abstract" ?? how when the sun is gone - "streetlights in the dark blue" - he can no longer blind himself and is forced to look at the corpse of his relationship ?? how to love is to let go ?? how can he keep getting away with this i'm sobbing ??

His Dark Materials is a franchise that tackles so many branches of physics and even creates a universe where the main course of study is experimental theology which is all about identifying and explaining dark matter while also adding dimensions to string theory, the multiverse theory, and the very concept of the human soul. At the same time, it aggressively calls out the problem with the state being controlled by the church, how people are condemned for being different and religious fearmongering stops the chance at growth both on an individual and a societal scale. It’s a franchise where the heroes of the story are two children who aren’t allowed to know the prophecy they’re a part of, who save the world unwittingly simply by doing what they believe to be right. Meanwhile, the person who thought he was the hero all along, the person who rallied an army from multiple universes to FIGHT. GOD. HIMSELF. is ultimately consumed by his own ego and forced to take a back seat when he realises he’s just one tiny piece of a much larger story that’s true heart is his own daugher. The child he abandoned, the child he didn’t know or care to know how to look after. It’s a franchise about finding love even when your biological family abandon you, it’s about looking evil in the eye and seeing your own mother, it’s about good and evil not being black and white but instead a complex and cruel mixture of both. It’s about the two worst people you know banding together at the last second to save their daughter with their final breaths. It’s about exploration and learning how to grow through experience, it’s about kindness being shared across the multiverse, exchanging stories with strangers and saving the whole world by doing something perfectly ordinary and receiving no reward.

Oh, and it’s also a franchise rich with fantasy, with giant talking polar bears, witches and ghosts, angels and daemons, and a mammal-like species from another world that travels exclusively on roller skates. 

And it fucking. rocks.

holding my own face in my own hands and screaming “there is no connection without an open heart! you must be brave! you must be honest! you must be true!” in the mirror

the angel staying over at my house asked for a nightlight in their room and i told them buddy, don't you produce your own light? what're you gonna do with more? and they said they wanted to see why people like it so much. and also that the nightlight i own is blue and they're been trying to understand color. anyways i think they've stared at it for an hour now

“Trollet som grunner på hvor gammelt det er“ by Theodor Kittelsen

“(Troll Wonders How Old He Is)”

Day 24093 This is my house. I won’t allow anyone to harm it. There should have been no more intruders after the last one. I do not want these people here. They will leave-

Day 24095 They are siblings. They are loud. Always singing and talking and stomping. As if they must be louder than anything else.

Day 24106 There are bolts on the door now. Bolts and hideous, gaudy new locks. How dare they-

Night 24112 I was going to fill the night with terrors. But he woke up screaming before I began. She came running from the other room. They sleep right across the hall from each other, with the doors on a crack. …they are young, are they not, to be living on their own. Was I ever so young?

Day 24114 She has fixed the squeak in the door at the top of the stairs. It never squeaked when I still lived.

Day 24121 The noise of the doorbell scares them. But they get so many deliveries. It is a good bell. It has worked all these years- I can see one of the men coming now with his packages, trudging up to the door. …perhaps if I knock before he is here, they will come and look before he can sound the bell.

Day 24129 He is planting flowers in boxes on my windowsills. I always wished I could have some flowers.

Night 24137 She is afraid of the dark. I could see it in her eyes when she got out of bed. …I lit the lamps for her.

Day 24142 They have moved the couch to the sun spot a little to the right of the window. That is where I used to have my armchair. It is the only sensible place for it.

Day 24163 Sometimes the noises of the world are suddenly too much for him. He winces and tries not to sway his head. This is my house. …I can keep it calm and quiet for a while.

Day 24178 She just got a phone call and now they are both laughing. Laughter is a good sound, isn’t it. They said this house has been good luck…

Night 24205 They are singing in our kitchen. He found my cookbook in the gap at the back of the kitchen cabinet and now they are trying to cook. They wanted to start with the soufflé. They don’t even know how to make béchamel! I turned the page to the casserole instead.

Day 24236 This is my house. These are my boarders. I won’t allow anyone to harm them.

if you think about it, every time we tranquilize animals to transport them safely to another place, we are the sleep paralysis demon

HOLD ME LIKE WATER

OR CHRIST, HOLD ME LIKE A KNIFE

Anis Mojgani, from “Here I Am”, Songs from Under the River: A Collection of Poetry

"mortifying ordeal of being known" shut up let's talk about the miraculous kindness of being remembered

i want art to feel EARNEST. this disgusting, near pornographic level of tongue in cheek meta humor is making me sick to my stomach. i don’t know how many more movies i can take about clever subversions and the movie winking at you to say “we know it’s a little silly, but…” where is the whimsy? why can’t we believe in the pretend you’ve created? why don’t you have enough faith in it? in my ability to believe?

if it sucks hit da bricks <- litany against sunk cost

take it easy but take it <- litany against burnout/apathy cycle

fuck it we ball <- litany against perfectionism

now say something beautiful and true <- litany against irony poisoning

You think math should relate to the real world? What are you, some kind of physicist? Get the fuck out of here

On mother's day

Mum

I'm sorry

i love you i swear i do i just cant say it. i dont remember the last time i did. i do remember when i promised myself i never would again and now i cant anymore

im sorry and i know you are too i know you love me. you do say it. and you want me to say it back. you hug me and want me to hug you back. you kiss me and want me to kiss you back. i cant. im so sorry.

it hurts and i know it hurts you too. i know, because it kinda was the point. it was payback for hurting me. i was a kid and scared and powerless and the only thing i could take away from you and dad was myself. so i did. as punishment. i didnt know i was punishing myself too. i didnt know i didnt know any better im sorry.

and when we left him i thought we'd be fine. but we're not. we're so obviously not. we're alone with each other and i dont know how to love. and you dont know a lot about me.

you gave me my life and have been with me almost every second of it. and there's so much you don't know. so much i've kept from you. i kept myself from you for too long. i dont know how to give myself back.

and i don't know if you'd want it. if you'd like it. me. if you'd like me.

i remember you wanted me to do ballet, like my cousin. im sorry im black belt now. i remember you wanted me to go shopping with you. im sorry i couldnt care less about it. (i AM sorry. you like it so much and i just dont.) i remember every time i've had to put makeup on and how pretty you say i look. im sorry the mirror makes me want to cry.

im sorry we dont care about the same things. its not that i dont care about you. its not the only way you can care about me.

i remember when i wasnt too excited about doing my hair and you said i might as well have been born a boy im not a boy im just not a girl in the ways you want me to be

i know it hurt that you are not going to my graduation party im sorry, it hurt me too. it hurt me to. I hurt me too. im sorry dad's gonna get mad when he finds out he's not going either. im sorry he hurt us so much.

i remember when you said im cold. im not. i just dont know how to feel out loud. not anymore. not in front of you, anyway. and today you said you hope to at least be invited to my wedding. im sorry i dont know if im ever gonna get married.

but if i marry a girl, would you go?

please go.

im sorry this was such an awful mothers day.

im sorry im sorry im sorry i know im not what you wanted but its all i can be

please understand please love me please forgive me

x your only daughter

I always feel so worried about anyone I know who's 22-23 because I know those ages are the most hyped up yet shatteringly lonely times for most young adults when they expect so much from themselves and have been set up to fail at the same time but don't see that yet because they did everything they were supposed to and have probably started to feel so lonely and don't understand why seeing friends is suddenly getting way harder and time is going faster than ever

Those are like the speed batting ages where you are swinging so hard so fast trying to get this and you're striking out and even when you do hit you realize your just running in a circle and it starts to weigh on you and no one else is acknowledging it.

If you're 22-23 it's okay keep going, please try and remember to eat and sleep well and that there's nothing for you to win at, and you're not done changing no matter how set things feel

Why don’t I hear more about undead beings coming back to warn people? It’s always zombies wanting to drag people down to join them in the grave, ghosts seeking vengeance, spirits trying to chase people out of their domains - but if you died horribly and were left rattling around some spooky mansion for eternity, wouldn’t you want to stop people from blundering into the same death you had?

You feel a cold breath on your neck as you get in the car. It won’t leave until you fasten your seatbelt. An unseen force catches your foot as you pass the fourth step every time you walk up the stairs. During a renovation, you find out the wood is rotten. You can never find a pack of cigarettes - even ones guests bring disappear from their pockets and are found weeks later on the lawn, empty. Your daughter is giggling and laughing at something unseen, chasing after it away from the cliffside on your family hike. You don’t know why, but you feel compelled to leave a spare hairband and some stickers on a picnic table as you leave the park. Tribute? A thank you? The items are gone by next time you visit, and you swear a happy child’s hum follows you home on the breeze.

…More preventative hauntings. It just makes sense.

chapter 26, crooked kingdom

what the actual fuck was going on at this show

[x]

29.3.23 Guadalajara, México

Credit: Julio del Toro Calvario

Art from: amordeveranostd

oh and also "she's american".....

they really got "the ballad of me and my brain" and "inside your mind".....cant recover....

Kaz shrugged. “Kill us, and you’ll never find Kuwei.” Van Eck appeared to consider this. Then he stepped back. “Guards to me!” he shouted. “Kill everyone but Brekker!” Kaz knew the instant he made his mistake. They’d all known it might come to this. He should have trusted his crew. His eyes should have stayed trained on Van Eck. Instead, in that moment of threat, when he should have thought only of the fight, he looked at Inej. And Van Eck saw it. He blew on his whistle. “Leave the others! Get the money and the girl.”

— SIX OF CROWS, Chapter 45

The idea of english as a mother tongue is so strange to me, in my head english is how ppl communicate when there’s no way in common to communicate, so english as a mother tongue sounds a bit like idk email as a mother tongue ykwim? Like english to me feels like the stuff that’s used to fill the empty spaces between languages

Do you think I have forgotten about you?

Robbers (2014) | About You (2022)

Lyra had lied to Iofur Raknison with her words; her mother was lying with her whole life. The Amber Spyglass, Chapter 30: The Clouded Mountain (x.)

HIS DARK MATERIALS (2019—2022) 1.07 The Fight to the Death | 3.07 The Clouded Mountain

@lgbtqcreators creator challenge | adaptations

“You know all those stories that say the greatest love is the one that you can’t live without? The one you’re prepared to die for? That’s not right. That’s not what love is.”