MESMERISED
Me with Brennan Lee Mulligan because he's so pure I love him
do you ever see a person and you are overcome with incredible fondness? and you just think "oh." but not in a romantic or sexual way you are just filled with warmth and it makes you happy, it just does. and you think "i'm so happy you exist. i'm happy you are somewhere out there in the world, doing your thing". it's love but also not entirely
like people are lovely and i feel it in my entire chest like a burning candle that smells like roses and a sunny day
"Only I get to reduce them to this" SCREAMING NAOBDOBKSBKEV OMGGGGGG
When the heroes asked to meet with you, you thought the situation would be dire, otherwise the heroes would never have dared to ask for your help, but when they explained their predicament you could not help but laugh at just how ridiculous it was.
I'm gonna say it!!
you're telling me I get to stay in a room all by myself. I get to DECIDE THE TEMPERATURE, I get to feel clean and refreshed, I CAN EVEN SHOWER WITH THE LIGHTS OFF for a delightful sensory experience. I can't be the only shower enjoyer the activity as a whole is just so incredible
I easily get headaches and I'm super sensitive to light, and however much I like how the sun makes everything look so pretty and how being warm is a very needed thing for me, having events in winter or fall/autumn is so necessary for so many people, especially neurodivergent and/or disabled people.
i will do my best to put this into action, myself in my own city, but i really want to see pride events that take place in months other than June. yes I understand the historical significance of these events taking place during the month of June, but the problem is summer time is not an accessible time of year for many disabled people. extreme heat and exposure to sunlight for long periods of time can cause many people to get sick or even need to be hospitalized.
psychotic people, people with heart conditions, people with autoimmune disorders, people with inflammatory bowel diseases, autistic people, schizophrenic people, people with fibromyalgia, people with POTS, people with ADHD, diabetic people, people with arthritis, and many, MANY other neurodivergent people and people with other chronic health issues struggle in hot weather. there are people who have seasonal affective depression that hit them the hardest during summer months. some people are taking medications that make them sensitive to heat and/or sunlight.
it becomes harder to navigate when you're hot and tired. for people who fatigue and exhaustion issues, they can become instantly drained of energy from sweating and standing in the hot sun. some people faint if they get too hot, some people vomit, some people need to be rushed to the hospital. there are a lot of health complications that can arise from someone overheating, or getting too much sunlight. dehydration becomes a massive risk during hot summer months, which can make anyone sick, but can be especially devastating for disabled people.
there usually aren't very many indoors events during pride month, due to the small amount of businesses which are willing to host such events on their property. while many queer businesses owners jump at the opportunity, and thankfully so, queer-owned businesses are far, far outshadowed by non-queer owned and operated businesses, which often leads us floundering to find safe places to hold events indoors during pride month.
i'm not suggesting replacing them, but rather fighting for events that take place outside of just june. this will benefit everyone for a multitude of reasons, but we especially owe it to disabled folks who can't celebrate outside or attend the parades like they want to. it's great to celebrate during the summer, when many people have plenty of time off to attend events. but for a lot of disabled, neurodivergent and chronically ill folks, summer is a very dangerous time of year. i understand the historical significance of when we celebrate these events.
I had been skipping a lot of school, since I was struggling with depression, so I missed an English exam, which, at the time, I was not good at, at all. I think this specific incident was in like year 9?
I had to sit outside the classroom the next class to do the test, and I just didn't know how to do it, so I just cried. For the whole hour. I didn't even write a single word. The teacher came out before the class fully ended and lectured me for a bit for doing nothing, and she said a line that I will remember forever: "Crying won't help you with your GSCEs"
If you don't know what GSCEs are, they're exams that you have to do at the end of secondary school, and they're mostly pretty important, I couldn't do Psychology in college this year because I got a 1 (basically like an F or something) in English in my GSCEs. You usually do tons of mock exams in year 9, 10 and 11 for your core subjects (English, Math and the sciences[chemistry, physics and biology]) and for your chosen subjects which you chose in year 8 (I chose photography, textiles and French)
Like what? You see your student crying, and instead of comforting them or asking what's wrong, you tell them that crying won't help with their GSCEs? They fucking know that?
And yeah I understand if she wanted me to stop crying so I could get back in the class on time, or if she was frustrated that I didn't do anything, but that's not an ok way to deal with it. She's a professional. She should be able to deal with it professionally.
After class ended, she held me up after class and lectured me. I went mute. I didn't talk at all. I just shrugged when she asked me "Why didn't you write anything?", I didn't give her any verbal answer.
This moment has stuck with me for ages. I ended up not going to class for a whole year and a half because of my depression and school struggles. I had to go into a small building in the school to just actually have attendance in school and be able to kinda get through my GSCEs. I also didn't get to go to prom in year 11 because of my poor attendance (which I think is bullshit, BTW, having poor attendance shouldn't mean you can't go to prom).
I've finished my first year of college this year, and I feel so much more supported. I had an option to get counselling (which I did get in the end, not when I needed it, but you know, it helped a bit with some trauma[I will say that I was most likely higher up on the list due to my previous attendance and obvious mental health issues]), and the teachers are understanding and kind (most of my secondary school teachers were nice, though).
I really struggle with things like presentations and being on camera, and I struggled doing a lot of my English presentations. I did get through them, and I think I did well on my English :). I had done all of my English presentations at the time of this situation, and my Business teacher was aware/notified that I struggled with it, I had also talked about my social anxiety with her in a class thing about social anxiety.
So I had to present my business to an audience of like 2 people instead of the whole class, and I got up in front of the classroom, and I couldn't talk, which isn't really uncommon, it happens a lot, so the teacher restarted the recording, and I couldn't do it again, then I just started crying because of how frustrated I was, so the teacher said to go sit down while one of there other kids set up for their presentation.
She came over and gave me some tissues and comforted me, and reassured me that I could do the presentation another day.
I did the presentation another day and I actually got through it. It was awkward and nerve-wracking, but I had so many accommodations to help me.
That is how you support a student. That is how you get the work done. I really appreciate her support and her kindness and understanding.
Both situations I will remember. Secondary school was a horrible experience. I've talked about the secondary school situation before a lot, because it genuinely affected me. It really made me feel small, and it made me feel like I was useless. There's a huge difference between intent and impact.
If you got this far, hello! Thank you for listening to (well, reading) my nonsensical rambling, I'm sorry if this makes no sense whatsoever, but I hope it's somewhat coherent :)
Mhm. Mhm. Same. Fr.
sometimes I feel like a little kitty cat
Can you Americans not take sweets into the movies?
So uh yeah
not to talk about doctor who but remember being a lonely depressed teenager and hearing him say ‘900 years of time and space and i’ve never met anyone who wasn’t important’
They/she + Any neos Kpop Fan Good omens fan If you couldn't already tell, I'm gay 🇵🇸
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