It's All So Tiresome

🍞 lately ...

recently, i've been trying to avoid digitally keeping track of my productivity. it's quite a difficult thing for me to tackle, as i've been heavily relying on my devices for pretty much everything! gradually, i will be moving more towards non-digital methods, such as traditional journals and planners.

the most distracting thing that i am aiming to tackle is my reliance on my phone. my screentime has been crazy and i'm not proud of it, considering that most of that time was social media. due to this, i am going to start using my phone as a tool; to transform its purpose from just being a distraction to being used to make productivity an easier process. it will be a difficult transition, so i don't expect myself to achieve this goal overnight. instead, i will take specific steps towards this goal. as of lately, i've been deleting instagram when i find myself getting looped up in the algorithm. i am aiming to get to a point where i can delete the app and only download it once a day to check any messages, then delete it again. i still use it for communication with friends and family, so i don't see myself deleting it permanently any time soon.

in general, i've also just been trying to avoid digital methods of productivity! it's not as big of a priority as avoiding my phone, but so far, i think i'm doing well! i have learned that if you write your goals down on paper, you will feel more inclined to work towards it, so i've been using my planner and journal recently! i used to use todomate for my daily todos, but i found that i am more successful when i actually write my tasks down on paper. i still use notion and google sheets on my laptop, but not as much as i used to. setting my goals on notion didn't help me much since i would rarely ever read them again. so now, i use notion as a kind of a database (?) for my ideas. i might explain more about it in a future post! as for google sheets, i've been using it to make trackers for myself. for example, i used to use yeolpumta to keep track of my study time but i eventually found it to be inconvenient because of how frequently i would have to unlock my phone to start and stop the timer. now, i just keep track of how many pomodoro sessions i complete, then record it on my google sheet tracker at the end of the day. this way, i am able to put my phone out of sight and out of mind!

lastly, i have been using google calendar for time blocking. but i have realized that i often don't commit to my schedule, so i am wondering if time blocking in my planner might be better. i might try it out soon! i want to make a big post before the start of the next quarter about some productivity tips, so i'll be testing different methods and report on what works for me!

Insane to me that certain comic book creators who shall not be named dismissed Jonathan Harker as a "milk sop" and a boring character. White-haired avenger with ambiguously vampiric superstrength Jonathan Harker. Most violent and unhinged member of the vampire hunters Jonathan Harker. Ran at Dracula with a kukri knife without skipping a beat and then tried to climb out of a window to pursue him Jonathan Harker. "Like a living flame" Jonathan Harker. Calls his bond with his wife "the holiest love" and determines that if she becomes a vampire, even if Dracula calls her to his side, "she shall not go into that dark night alone" Jonathan Harker. You know. That one.

i went to a tiny counterserve diner once and accidentally poured sugar instead of salt all over my hashbrowns and was eating them sadly anyways. the waitress took them away and started making me another one and I tried to protest, but she just snorted and said "we're not catholic here". now every time i'm doing something painful out of obligation i think about how that is not repenting, this body is not a catholic establishment, there is no nobility in suffering.

describing my relationship to someone by introducing them to people as "an old wound"

it was never anything grand that vincent painted w those strokes like its running molten silver and gold that hes seeing when looking at faces and barley and wheat in fields and skies above them. everything was beautiful rivulets and ridges and dancing in front of his eyes bc he saw it as beautiful as simple things often are. and then he communicated that because he had to. the plus side of training your eye to find beautiful in the mundane and simple things you only need to get out of your bed and house to see is that you then Have to tell people about it somehow otherwise you will die drowning in air. what a dear life to live that is and how easy it is to decide for that to be the way you live it

Reblog for a larger sample size for no sample size at all, because obviously nobody will vote

"Stuck in the timeloop as a punishment" is cool and all, but stuck in the timeloop voluntarily though? Oh, brother. Stuck in the timeloop cause you just can't move on. Stuck in the timeloop even if you know that it's not real and whatever should've happen already did. Stuck in the timeloop even if doesn't makes you happy. You just can't bear the thought of not being able to see them ever again. Stuck in the timeloop even if you know you should move on. Stuck in the timeloop even if you know they would want you to move on.

But maybe just a little while longer.

This is a masterlist to help you , elevate your mindset. It only works if you actually implement it , just watching videos and daydreaming, will not.

I'm always open to suggestions to add any videos to this , just send me an ask or a comment

how to master your emotional intelligence

"friends" to watch out for

you are a queen , u were born one

bye bye lazy girl era

the song jia effect

overcome your phone addiction

acceptance and change

learning to value

not taking risks , is the biggest risk

the perfect student

your enemies are secretly addicted to you

creating a successful mindset

mindset is everything

being your own dream girl

stop being lazy and pathetic

I always forget that when some people ship characters it's because they want them to fuck and not because they think they exist as twisted parallels of each other. "we all have the same goal, to see them fuck." I personally have the goal of coring them like apples and showing them they're the same or could have been under different circumstances.