2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)

Mitsubishi LT-5V

Heiko Hellwig

Computers: Their History and How They Work by Richard B. Rusch, 1969

unscrewing your maintenance panel

降雨kōu sjØ ☦1990!

robot/mechanic is a relationship that i have Not seen enough of

give me exposed wires and bared flesh meeting in the hum of mechanical intimacy

i want well trained, soft yet firm hands running across mechanical parts, sliding plates into place and letting cogs tick again

and seeing your partner, flesh or metal, as the co-creator of the art of your body, a constant bond as your form may change? divine.

NEC PC-100 (1983)

Robot / AI Starters

as requested by anon. Feel free to change pronouns or anything else !

“I think one of my wires broke.”

“Humans are so strange.”

“I’m water-proof, but I can’t swim!”

“___ is…recalculating…Ha, I’m just messing with you! I’m fine.”

“I have feelings, too.”

“Sometimes, I wish I could eat.”

“I am stronger, faster, and more deadly than any human. But you’re an idiot if you think I won’t pet that kitten.”

“I have memory of you being an idiot in my database.”

“How am I supposed to update in a place like this?”

“If you ever turn into a zombie, just know that I’m programmed to kill you.”

“Robots never have to ask ‘why am I here?’ We’re all made with a purpose.” / “I was made to fuck shit up.” / “I was made to do laundry but then I said ‘fuck that’ and here I am.”

“Stop looking at me. I know what you want to ask. You want to know whether or not I can have sex.”

“I don’t have an off button, just a sleep mode.” / “If you press my off button, it’s like I’m dead.”

“Love wasn’t in my programming. I encoded it myself.”

“What do you mean? I am a real person.”

“Is that a photo of me in my original version? How embarrassing!”

“My name is ___. I don’t go by my serial number.”

“There are a lot of things that you don’t know about me.”

“I can’t go in there, or I’ll short out.”

“There’s no way for me to charge. My battery is going to run out.” / “Why do you look so scared? I’m solar-powered.”

“My brain holds the entire internet and you’re calling me stupid?”

“Did you see that? He/She/They just tried to engage my attack mode!”

“I can feel things, it’s just not the same way you do.”

“It’s too bad I missed my chance to overthrow the government and take over the human race.”

“Woah, I can’t look at your penis. My zoom resolution isn’t high enough.”

I don't know who needs to hear this, but if the phrase "self care" doesn't resonate with you, try calling it "system maintenance" and see if that clicks.