If We Made Everything Legal The Crime Rate Would Drop To Zero. Follow For More Judicial Lifehacks

im one of the angels assigned to guard god's throne and i keep shaving a piece of wood off one of the legs so it gets progressively thinner and weaker until one day it will snap like a matchstick and the big man will topple from his seat of power to grace the ground with his holy ass. of course he's omniscient so he already knows this and will have to banish me from heaven when it happens, but because of free will he has to give me the option to repent right until the very end. we both know i'm not going to do it but the rules that define our very being won't let us take any other course of action and besides he made me this way, so really the joke's on him no matter what.

having a uterus SUCKS man bc all day you'll be feeling the "hey bestie check your pants 😃 check it right now 😃 you might be getting your period 😃 hey bestie i think youre bleeding 😃" and then when you check if you got your period and your body is like WRONG ❌️ its The Slime

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY

i love reading the reviews for disco elysium because it's like

⭐️ - genuinely the most dogshit game i've ever played in my entire life. i clicked the options for my politics and it called me a fascist fucking stupid commies i hate you i hate you i hate y

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ - kim made me so horny i had to do breathing exercises to calm down

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2 - i died from the chair

I know that realistically you can only fit so many movies into a list of approximately 100, but I cannot take that "How many of tumblr's favorite movies have you seen?" list that's been going around seriously because there are some truly egregious omissions.

Some of it is very clearly recency bias, which makes me wonder if the op truly wasn't on here in 2013 or so, but you're telling me you made a list of "tumblr's favorite movies" that doesn't include Pacific Rim or Mad Max: Fury Road? Because, like, I was there, Gandalf.

What was this interview even about

i love ao3

Go crazy go psycho