Latest Posts by teatreeandaloe - Page 5

Lmfao NOOO 💀

What's your favorite food at McDonald's?

I thought we've been over this? Aren't you the same girl who suggested I build a McDonald's in my factory? I don't think you understand how unhealthy their "food" is, and I use the term loosely because it isn't food fit for human consumption. It's 40% pink paste, 20% GMOs and 40% human DNA. And it makes you overweight.

Do I look like I eat McDonald's to you? That photo alone is giving me heartburn.

💀👀👀

I just started my period and I'm cramping so I'm laying in bed watching your sexy self act crazy on tv, eating sugar cookies, and drinking ginger ale to help my stomach

Ew. TMI.

But yeah, feel better.

Truuu

What's one of your favorite songs?

Coolio's Gangster's Paradise, it's such a classic!

💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃

Can you please post the Willy Wonka song you used in the "when your candy sells" meme you made Mr Wonka? Please 😊😊😊

Ah, here it is. Excuse the language.

Benji Ceez & Rich The Kid - Willy Wonka

I got sunburned :(

Ouch. Put some ointment on that and you'll be fine.

I close my eyes too tight

I hide in the shadows of my mind

Behind the doors of my heart

And wonder why he never woke up

Why people are ice cold

Then I slowly remember the reasons for why

I would rather be alone

Than to be around those who do wrong

Take advantage

And disarm

So I'll keep sculpting

Because it's the one thing

That doesn't bring me harm

I have nothing else to say

I'm not good at expressing my emotions

I wish people would do better

And love each other more

That's all

~ Edward

So cool!

#gettinganewcanesoon 🎩

I mean this upmost serious:

Could you record yourself reading some book?

My dear man, you could read a dictionary and it would sound heavenly.

Of course! What book would you like me to read? I was thinking Charlotte's Web as I happen to like that book.

Did you plan for all the kids to get hurt in ur factory.

The Oompa Loompa songs were a bit too detailed.

I’m on to you sir!

No, I didn't, life just has a funny way of serving karma. They wouldn't listen to my warnings so they paid the consequences. My Oompa Loompas are very talented at improvising songs, they're quite intelligent and creative. Seriously, those snot-nosed brats weren't harmed, merely altered. Ha.

I have this theory that you're bipolar. Mainly cause when you go from being cheery to angry and petty quick. Every time the kids say something annoying you snap at them. When Augustus fell in your chocolate river you looked mad and like you didn't give a fuck then when the sucky thing sucked him up you had a smirk on your face and didn't do anything cause you wanted to see what would happen. You could've easily told your oompa loompas to get him out. You seemed like you really tried to warn all the kids except Augustus. Is it because he's fat? At the beginning of the tour you sarcastically body shamed him. You lowkey got a dark side lol

I don't understand anything you're saying. Each child was a complete brat and their parents were equally irresponsible for contributing to their kid's downfall, a lack of discipline, parenting and all that stuff.

Example, Augustus and his mother are the same size, if you get what I'm saying. If she had told him to put down a cookie or two years ago then maybe he wouldn't have been so tempted and greedy at the factory. And I was the true victim here, I had to drain my poor chocolate river and replace all the contaminated chocolate. That cost me a lot of money. So I don't want to hear about how I'm such a terrible person for supposedly taking a little pleasure in their pain.

I'm sorry for our little fight earlier. This new herbal tea I'm drinking has me acting strange. Emphasis on herbal. I think Alice spiked it

All is forgiven. And since we're apologizing, I'm sorry for telling Edward that you're a no good gap tooth tea-drinking scallywag. Heh.

I'm not sorry for my comments about Alice, though. I stand by them, and now you see what I mean for yourself. She's clearly got you tripping off the herbs. What is it this time? Opium Poppy? Tsk tsk.

Ok chefboyarwilly

Homemade dinner guaranteed to taste better than ya mama's cookin'!

Indian style chicken and vegetable tray bake; sweet potatoes, courgettes, peppers, onions, cauliflower and fennel to start, tossed in oil, cumin and turmeric. Chicken pieces marinated in garlic, ginger, garam masala, homemade smoked chilli sauce, and lime juice. Roasted for 45 minutes then added broccoli, chopped garlic and tomatoes. Finished off for another 15 minutes and then served with a few dollops of raita (yogurt, mint, cucumber and coriander). And to wash it down, Verdi Spumante white sparkling wine, imported from Italy.

Look at those beautiful, bright colors. Those crisp veggies. That succulent, tender chicken.

Who said I can't hold it down in the kitchen? No one? Oh, I thought so. Ha.

why would you want willy to know you stank gurrr

If a girl's coochie smells like tuna fish is that bad for men? Asking for a friend 😅😐😶🤐

I think m-maybe that's a q-question for your gynecologist, dear girl.

...Heh...yeah. Gynecologist.

I'm not a doctor. I'm a chocolatier. I make chocolate. 'Kay?

The shade you be throwing at Alice, Mike, and Augustus on here and the way you be responding to your dad in the comments be KILLING MEEEE LMFAO YALL FUNNY AF 😭😭😭😭

And when mad hatter was yelling at you and Edward through your asks and you were like "oh..." I died. And Some girl said you get her wet and your dad said he hope they ain't a minor, please come get your dad. It's the chaos for me 💀💀💀

You know what they say, if you don't like my shade then step out of my shadow. That Alice is something, though. A drunk. Hmph.

As for my dad, unfortunately there isn't much I can do to deter his behavior.

Fight fight fight!

Would you like to be friends? 😁😄😃

Ha ha...no.

Because you see, most people aren't going to put the same amount of effort in that I do...and that is the biggest form of rejection to me. The worst kind, actually. Friends let you down, or people you trust betray you and steal your secret chocolate recipes, why should I want them? Besides, The Buckets, Hatter and Edward are my dearest friends. I have no more tolerance for others. Maybe you should ask Edward, he told me that it gets lonely up in that stuffy castle sometimes, and unfortunately I can't visit often. He lives quite the distance and my factory is demanding.

It's Willy Wonka though lmao

Your page growing fast af. One of your posts from bout 2 days ago got 90 something notes already wtf 😂😂🤣

I don't know! But that's magnificent!

Coca bean is weird

Cocoa here!

So... Have you ever been outside while it was raining and just stood in the rain?

Ah...no. Rain makes you sticky and sick, why would you stand in it intentionally?

We might need to discuss a few of your life choices, Cocoa Bean.

I just wanna see your bedroom pweaseee mister wonka 😔😢

I normally wouldn't allow my privacy to be intruded on, but since you said please and my room is in order today, I will this once.

Before you ask, the walls are not made of chocolate, they are designed to LOOK like chocolate. Otherwise it would melt and collapse and that would be terrible to wake up to. Haha!

No insult to your hair, and your hair is great (it looks so silky...)

I'm just weird and sometimes get thoughts like that when I look at people.

For some reason I think that Charlie Bucket likes spiders and snails and all that stuff. Or at least tolerates them.

Hm, you're a very strange little cocoa bean...

Ugh, no! Absolutely not. I wouldn't ever allow Charlie to bring those furry little creepy crawlers into the factory. I'd have my Oompa Loompas exterminate them at once! Bugs and insects are not to be around my precious chocolate, or anything else for that matter. That's just disgusting.

You good

Dear, tumblrs. If you have asked a question or commented on something of mine and I haven't responded, I am terribly sorry. My asks are backed up and I get at least 20-45 notifications at a time, some of which I hadn't noticed until this morning while eating my breakfast. It's a really fast pace to maintain between answering questions and running the factory.

Heh....so sorry.

Lmfaooooo y'all better leave this man dafuq alone

I wanna touch you in ways that are too inappropriate to say 🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂

I see...

And I'd prefer it if you kept your dirty fantasies and your sticky little fingers to yourself, 'kay?

Sure, I don't really care for names either.

I don't do much. I'm just there, I talk a lot of weird stuff, and I like cats.

Nevermind anonymous then, I'll stick with calling you Cocoa Bean. Yes, I like that much better. It's got a chocolate-y ring to it.

Silly question:

Are you bad at math?

No, I'm actually really good at math, to my own surprise.

I have always hated numbers until they had to be incorporated into my business (pricing, costs, investments, income, salaries, etc). Maybe that's why I'm good at math after all.

Good night Willy

Round and round and round she goes, where she stops, nobody knows! Ha ha!

Welcome to the Chocolate Factory, the place where if she doesn't like chocolate then I don't want her. Ahaha! I kid, I kid. But seriously. Look at this baby stir.

While some of you are closing your tired little eyes to sleep, we're up whip-whipping it, boxing and shipping it! ✨

Goodnight world.

Ok then here you go:

It's the cover of take me home, country roads by Kira Lise. She put that whole thing in a minor key. It's so sad but so beautiful and makes me longing for something I can't explain

Even though you were right about it not being my cup of tea, it is a very beautiful song.

I listened to this cover and then the original. I kind of prefer this version. It's more somber, puts you in a headspace that the original doesn't, in my opinion.

What's a secular song that get you lit? 😂

Gets me what? Nevermind, I had to Google what "lit" means. You kids and your slang are always changing.

One of my guilty pleasures is Knuck If You Buck by Crime Mob, but I rarely listen to it due to the horrible, filthy language...

Thoughts? 😭😭😭😭

Ha ha ha, yes! Everybody wave and wiggle!

So your eyes are not purple? I mean that's fine of course, but I liked to think there's some kind of magic behind your eyes.

Oh, well...I'm sorry to disappoint you. But there has always been magic behind these eyes, rest assured, dear! It's how I create all my delicious chocolate, you gotta have the vision and the magic! ☺️

So I talked to Tarrant last night about the get together as you requested and he would like to know why do you dislike Alice and not want her to come, what do I say? 😨

Oh, dear Edward! Poor boy, I shouldn't have asked you to talk to him, I apologize. I dislike Alice because she got drunk with a blue caterpillar at the last get together and made a complete fool out of herself (and offered some of my Oompa Loompas a sip of her "Trippy Juice"). No need to be nervous dear boy, I'll handle it from here.