The-crying-shadow - Crying-Shadow

Getting bored and remembered I can actually post stuff

So there's death... obviously. It's kind of sad depending on the circumstances. But after a while, you move on, right? I mean, you're supposed to move on.

Anyone who is stuck on the death of someone or something for over a year is honestly forcing themselves to be stuck on it at that point.

Because it's natural to move on from it. You don't stay stuck on it that long naturally.

But I was thinking about love and why it seems to hurt more when it dies. Half of the time, it leaves a deeper scar.

Love dies too, like everything else does.

So I kind of started kind of wondering

Why does it hurt longer when love dies? Why does it leave more permanent scars? I eventually came up with an answer that actually satisfies me.

Love dies twice, and three times. Then it can die a fourth a time.

Everything else that dies, dies once. However, love can continue to infinitely die forever. It can stop abruptly. You could just never love anyone again, and it won't die for you again. On the other hand, you can continue to love. It can continue going down the wrong path and die repeatedly. Or you can quickly find the right path, but it IS highly unlikely... It's going to continue until you either stop doing it or you find someone perfect.

That last time I'd really had a crush was in I think fourth grade. Until then though, I never really had a crush on, or loved someone. I mean, I've loved people still. But not romantically. I can't say it's impossible for me to feel romantic love because I'm sure I still can. I still feel the emotions everyone else feels. However, I can't help but notice everyone else's constant want or need for love, when I feel fine without it. If anything, I steer away from it...

I don't know why. I just don't follow the concept of love. It's not even that I find it foolish, or stupid, or ridiculous. It's simply the fact that I harbor no feelings towards the idea of love. I don't feel the need for it anymore, I don't feel the need for a relationship anymore.

So to be honest, if I end up being single from my days now in high-school until I die, I might not have a problem with that.

One of my friends asked me why I don't just try to heal myself

And I never came up with an answer

But I already had an answer, I just didn't want to sound stupid

I don't do it because I know I'm not done hurting

So I'm not going to fix myself if I'm not done breaking

The only way I can be fixed is if I'm finished breaking until I get broken down again

The only thing is, I don't think I'm going to stop breaking

And if I do it won't be soon

The other thing, if I'm going to break again then why should I rebuild myself?

Why should I take anywhere from days to years to rebuild myself when it only takes a few seconds to be broken again

And the worst part is when one part of you breaks it's almost guaranteed the rest will too

Rebuilding a person can take 10 years, breaking a person can take 10 seconds

Thats the exact reason why people would rather destroy me then help me

Which is why I thank all of my friends for being good people to me even though I'm always the depressed person in our group.

I kind of want to text you but I don't want to bother you.

I miss you though:)

Too bad, Waluigi time!

I don't know what this means but it's Waluigi Time now because we say so

I was literally thinking the exact same thing